//------------------------------// // Chapter: 7 Second Verse // Story: Empty Pages // by Blind Gardener //------------------------------// The very next day, Twilight decided to go visit the guard kitchen again for more pancakes. She was sure her brother would be here again, and her daily journal had stated that she had felt very happy sharing the pancakes with Celesta. She was looking forward to repeating the experience enough times to remember it. With this on her mind, Twilight firmly strapped Dame Smarty Pants of the Collared Rose, in her elaborate knight's uniform, onto her back, making sure that the jousting stick was in place. She would get her revenge for her brother reading her checklist! Unless he had read it again. With that she charged the door to the pantry. *whump* Twilight impacted with the door, which was unimpressed with her filly like strength. She rebounded, landing on her rump. She then began to rub at her muzzle, teary eyed. After a moment, she picked herself up again, turned, and gave the door a solid bucking with both of her feet "Take THAT door!" The door was unimpressed, but now Twilight's hooves hurt just as much as her nose. With a sigh she reached for the handle to open the door with her teeth. It was out of reach. She strained to the tips of her hooves to reach for the handle but she was too short. She could have just opened it with her magic, but that seemed unsatisfying, especially in the role of noble steed that she was playing for Smarty Pants. Everypony knew earth ponies made the best noble steeds. Pegasi were the daring, brash, loud mouthed warriors. Unicorns were the dark and mysterious magicians. Earth Ponies were solid and dependable. Twilight wanted to be solid and dependable. She knew she wasn't. She was forgetful and distractible and twitchy. She wasn't the least bit brave nor mysterious. She had heard the adults talking about her, and was starting to think that maybe her magic had something to do with whatever they thought was wrong with her. Maybe if she was an Earth Pony she would be more normal. Not liking this turn of thought, she turned back to her vile nemesis, the door. She had an idea for how to deal with it! She threaded some string quickly through a button with her magic. "You may think you've won, foul door, but I shall be victorious in the end!" Twilight declared, "Smarty! Prepare the grappling hook!" She used her magic to twirl around a piece of string, then make like Smarty was throwing it. It wrapped around the handle, and she pulled down. The door came open at last! Twilight did a happy little hoofy victory dance, then strode confidently into the storeroom. It was dark, and a little bit spooky. Brother wasn't visible this time, just a bunch of dusty boxes of turnips and celeriac roots. She saw something slinking through the shadows, and pressed herself tightly against a box. She cocked her head to the side as though listening to Smarty talking, but remained where she was. A rat about half large as she was, in a tiny chef's hat, walked past her chittering to a trio of smaller mice and rats. Twilight squeaked in surprise, and the rat turned to glare at her over the edge of its tiny glasses. Then it turned back to giving the others a tour. "You were right, Smarty, it was nothing to be afraid of. There's nothing dangerous in the princess' castle." Thus reassured, Twilight made her way to the door to the kitchen. She pushed it gently open, and glanced in. There was a unicorn in trainee armour and a larger male pony. It had to be brother! She barreled through the door. "AHA! Vile reader of checklists! Dame Smarty and I are here to take revengance!" She charged the other pony. He squealed as Twilight pushed him down and poked him with the lance. "Gah! T...Tickles! Quiddit!" He announced. The larger pony glanced at her, and snorted. "I remember you, little filly looking for your brother yesterday, right?" "Yup!" Twilight said eagerly, bouncing up and down on the poor pony under her hooves to a chorus of 'ough, gah, oof' The large pony nodded. "Cadet Trainee, make this filly some pancakes, and send her on her way." "Y...Yes sir" The cadet said from his current position under Twilight's hooves. "Let me up please?" Twilight hopped off of her victim. Soon enough Twilight was once again seated with pancakes. She smiled at the pony who made them, then cut into one. She took a bite... They tasted wrong. She frowned, remembering the lesson from yesterday. The pancakes were wrong, it wasn't brother! Suddenly Twilight was incredibly embarrassed. "You alright?" The other pony asked gently, placing a hoof comfortingly across her back. "Yeah, it's just... the pancakes aren't quite right." Twilight responded sadly. "Well, I'm really better at pineapple turnovers..." The other pony said earnestly. "Oh! I've never had pineapple turnovers before! Maybe next time?" Twilight asked brightly. "You know... that might be nice. Sure!" The guardspony trainee said. Twilight hugged the other pony. Brother was a guardspony, after all, so in a way all the guardsponies were family, right? They certainly seemed nice enough. So she didn't need to be embarrassed. This way she could also try all sorts of new foods too! She giggled happily as she kissed the other pony on the cheek and darted off "See you next time, 'brother'!" She needed something else to call her real brother. A name or something. Surely he had one, right? Shield? No, that didn't sound right. Maybe Shiny? Because he always had a shiny mane? Yeah! That would do it! Whistling happily, she trotted off to her lessons with Celestia. Meanwhile Shining Armour was slaving away in Celestia's private kitchen, making pancakes. Over him stood an elderly chef with a moustache that draped on the floor, and a hat that brushed the ceiling. "More pancakes" The pony demanded. "The Princess is seeing visitors." "I know. The visitor is my sister" Shining said, heatedly. His face was covered in flour, and he was exhausted. The Princess' appetite seemed endless today. This earned him a whack from the cold hearted beast. "Silence. The Princess said you are on punishment duty. The goal of this is punishment." The elderly pony said. "You are off kitchen duty once you can pluck this pebble from my hoof!" With a grunt Shining Armour twirled around, and grabbed the pebble in his magic. "THERE. Can I go now please?" "... Nopony's ever just... just done that before." The head chef stared at his hoof. "Can. I. Go. Now. Please?" Shining growled through taut teeth. "Yes... I suppose so." The head chef responded, sounding almost sad. "You have made enough pancakes for the rest of the month." "Thank you. I am going to go take a bath." Shining grunted, pushing through the door to leave. "Yes. You do that" The other pony continued to stare at his hoof, turning it over and over in front of his face. "Am I getting slow?" A few days later. "Right" The older kitchen master said to the new recruit, his eyes gleaming with mischief. "In a few hours, trainee, a young filly is going to come barging through that door. She's Twilight Sparkle." "T...Twilight Sparkle? Isn't she the most powerful unicorn in, like, ever and Celestia's personal student?" The trainee said, sweatin bullets. "Yup. The one and only. Now, she's going to confuse you for her brother, Shining Armour. You know him right?" The kitchen master said, a sinister smile on his face. "Y... Yeah, everypony knows him, he's the best of us." The trainee said "Erm, why is she going to confuse me for him? My coat is red and I'm a filly." the recruit said. "Because, Guardspony trainee Stamina. That's all the reason you need to know. Anyway, Shining will be pretty disappointed if you upset her" The kitchen master said, with a soft growl "Don't question it." Stamina gulped loudly. "Your mission is to keep that filly entertained, feed her whatever food you can cook up, and to try to enjoy yourself." The kitchen master's voice took on a wicked edge. "Fail and earn my ire, the ire of your princess, the ire of the most powerful unicorn in recorded history, and the ire of Shining Armour. Good luck, recruit." He laughed a dark and evil chuckle. "Y...yessir" Stamina stammered, staring at the door as though afraid of some threat from tartarus coming out to skin her to her hoof shoes. The kitchenmaster merely grinned to himself, enjoying the new twist in the old game of trainee baiting. Elsewhere Shining Armour was off of punishment duty at last, and highly appalled by events that had occurred in his absence. "You're telling me that there's a betting pool? ON MY SISTER" He demanded, stomping through the recruit barracks. "Yes, we're betting on how long it's going to take her to figure out you're not in the kitchens." one of the Trainees told him, while cowering in the corner. "This. Ends. Now" Shining said, grabbing the book in which the bets were recorded. It only took a few moments to render it to confetti. "All bets are off, you got that?" "Y...yes" The unfortunate book keeper said, "I got it." "Good. Now put me down on five bits for that reporter, Phoenix Quill, to try sneaking in through Celestia's toilet next." Shining said, more calmly. "Um..." The book keeper gestured to the torn up book on the ground. "That held... all of the bets." "Oh. Well then" Shining said rubbing the back of his head. "I'll be back later. No more bets on my sister, kay?" "Kay..." the bookie watched Shining leave. "So.. Five bits on her working it out by the end of the week?" One of the trainees asked cautiously. The bookie turned and hit the other trainee over the head with what was left of the cover of the book. "No." He said simply. Later, at home, Shining was staring quietly at Twilight while she played some game with Smarty. She seemed to have seated the doll he made her behind a table with a teapot that looked suspiciously like a smaller version of Celestia's. "Um... Twily?" He asked gently. She turned her adorable eyes to stare at him. He couldn't help but smile warmly. "Yes Shiny?" "You know I'm not in the kitchens anymore, right?" Shining asked carefully, ears in the back position. She nodded, eagerly "Yup, I know! They don't cook the same as you do!" She grinned eagerly, ears attentively forwards. "But they're almost as nice as you, so it's O.K" "So why are you calling them brother?" Shining asked cautiously, ears now unguarded. "Well, because guardsponies are brothers in arms, right? So they're all your brothers, so they're all my brothers right? Also, if I call them brother, they feed me" She smiled with that look of innocent mischief that only children can manage. Shining started laughing. "Ohhh you little glutton." He pushed her over. "I bet you haven't told Celestia yet, you little glutton." He started tickling her playfully and she squealed in response, wriggling like a seaworm. "Eek! Glehehehe! I'll tell Celestia! I promise! Glehehehe! Stop tickling!" She squirmed happily. Many miles away, Celestia was in a small white room, with scorch marks on the walls and a baby dragon in the center. She was holding a picture of a certain filly. "This is Twilight. Repeat after me. Twi. Light." "Mama" The baby dragon responded. He hiccuped and a jet of flame struck the wall. "No, Twi. Light" Celestia said, shaking her head. "Twi...light?" The dragon asked. He cocked his head inquiringly to the side. "Very good." Celestia said, patting the dragon on the head. "She's going to come visit soon." The dragon's face contorted into happy smile. "See mom! See mom!" He cheered, waving his claws in the air. Celestia rubbed her face gently with a hoof. "Nooo. See Twilight. See Twilight" she corrected patiently. "See Twilight! See Twilight!"