Chapter 2: It’s Cold Out Here
Applejack gave Fluttershy a quick nuzzle both to focus her attention and to keep her going. She didn’t fault the poor dear for being worried; her own mind was still pondering what Shining had just said. Still, a few things needed to be done first. Thinking could come later.
If Applejack could compare the Clementine to something she recognized, it was the tractor that had been in her family’s possession for almost twenty years. The faint aroma of old metal parts and grease clung to the air in a thin sheen. Other than the occasional odd look, the pair of them weren’t given too much attention. People scrambling back and forth with bags or parts in their grasp reminded her of Rarity when she being a fussy ninny. Fluttershy wasn’t watching where she was going, leaving her to take the lead.
“And you got a room fer both of us?” she asked their guide, the resident quartermaster.
“Yeah, yeah,” he grunted. The skinny human kept running a hand through his hair. Currently it was slicked into some giant cowlick. “You both were cleared for private quarters. Right here.”
The man looked up from his datapad and clicked a button on the door they stopped at. “This entire section of the ship is the living quarters. Until the time comes when we arrive on Magnasanti, this will be your living quarters to do with as you wish.”
Applejack had peeked in other rooms in the long and boring corridor, and what she saw was the same, if gutted, example. There was little more than a pair of bunk beds—fit for humans, of course, a small desk, and closet space. It felt like the size of her bathroom back home.
The quartermaster handed Applejack a datapad. “A general map of the ship, including off-limits areas, event list, and a list of terms for the duration of your stay.” He inhaled deeply, causing Applejack to snigger slightly; it looked like he had been giving the same instructions far too many times this day. “You are only hereby permitted on board until we dock in Magnasanti, you are not carrying anything hazardous or unlawful such as... etcetera, etcetera, all unscheduled pit stops or detours at your request will be denied unless reasons listed in that datapad are given and validated, and you agree to not put forth any legal action against Organic Corporate Operations for any reasons listed below up to and including the following reasons for delay, also listed below, war party assaults on safe shipping lanes, and chesterbursters. Understood?”
Applejack had been scanning the flat datapad carefully balanced on her hoof. What was a ‘sudden gravitational mass shadow’ supposed to be? “Mind if I get back to you on that? ...Wait, what!?” Yet before the quartermaster could answer for his choice of words, he had left to attend to his duties.
Fluttershy had been nosing around the room while the quartermaster talked. At least she was proactively doing a little investigating. She’d hardly said a word since Shining’s warning. “Ah know it’s not the most comfy—”
“It’s fine,” Fluttershy said quietly. Applejack blinked, surprised. Being quiet she expected, but Fluttershy never interrupted others.
“...Okay then.” Although the majority of their luggage had been loaded into the cargo hold, there was plenty of closet space to store. After a few brief moments that were only filled with the stowing of bags, Applejack tried again. “Listen, ah know all this, “ she gestured around, “is a lot to take in, sugarcube. If you ever need to just talk...”
Fluttershy did not reply. She was looking at the doorway, which someone currently occupied. He was a tall man with bronze skin. Grease and grime covered his blue-collar clothes, and welder goggles hid his eyes. A smile decorated his face.
WIth a slight nod, and a little lengthening of his smile, he left. No hospitality at all. Applejack snorted and bit back a retort. Most people were like Ana and Sam so far; friendly or indifferent. Those without manners or who just didn’t like ponies, while expected, were becoming increasingly more common.
The farmer smashed a hoof against the button that forced the door to close. Sleep would not come easy tonight.
The scent of warm earth and animal fur was pleasant and welcome to Fluttershy. To her it reminded her of the forests and plains, of the running animals for which she shared her affinity for compassion. The foods and kibbles stored behind oaken doors sustained them, and the heat of sleeping bodies hung in the air.
The hearth in Fluttershy’s cottage was alight with flickering flames. Two large, overstuffed armchairs were pointed towards the fire, but one of them was filled. Looking back towards the door nervously, she swallowed, steeled her shaky nerves, and hopped into the adjacent chair.
He was a rather dignified looking unicorn dressed entirely in white, although red stitching along his lapels and tophat seemed to glow in the firelight. His charcoal fur made his red eyes stick out all the more. He was currently nursing a wineglass with some unidentified amber liquid. Without even shifting to greet his guest—it wasn’t even his house—he pushed an identical glass across the tabletop between them. Fluttershy stared at the fireplace. The heat and warmth of it or the presence of her home was no comfort at all.
“Back so soon?” he asked politely. He had a very calm, soothing tenor. “Come now, my dear; no need for bad manners.”
“This is my house,” she replied.
“In more ways than one.” He tipped the glass to his lips and drained a portion, sighing contently. “Are you afraid of me?”
The smells. The warmth. The sense of peace and calm. Everything that she could hold onto and form a bastion of comfort vanished into smoke and disappeared into the evening. “Why do you keep coming back here?”
“That is not an answer.” She could feel his eyes staring at her. The side of her face began to itch. “You’ve never asked me to leave.”
True. Without looking for him, she grasped the wineglass and sipped. It reminded her of the wine at Cadance’s and Shining’s wedding, pleasant with a peach aftertaste. “No...”
The stallion looked at her over the rim of his glass as it hung halfway to his lips. The crackling fire cast shadows all across his face so much it was a surprise when he gave her a sorrowful smile. Setting his glass down, he removed himself from his chair. The floorboards squeaked noisily under the weight as he walked towards her own chair.
His eyes reminded her of so many other unpleasant things. The color alone was enough to make her stomach dry heave out of reflex. She swallowed down the bile that instinctively rose to her throat. She sniffed loudly to suppress the impending waterworks that were clawing at the corners of her eyes. Still he waited patiently in front of the fire for her like a proper gentlecolt until hot, traitorous tears fell from her eyes in mass.
“Shhhh... It’s okay.” Without even realizing it she was in his comforting embrace. The steady thrumming of his heartbeat soon drowned out the sound of fire eating the last little bits of ashen logs.
“S-s-sorry,” she hiccuped, “for getting your suit dirty.”
His comforting hoof stroked her head affectionately. “It is not the slightest bother, my dear.”
She continued to sniff and cry her eyes out while pressed into his chest. Ordinarily such a thing would make her blush and stammer, she realized. She’d never let any stallion, or even a mare for that matter, get comfortable in her presence like that. What an odd thing to think at such a time, and yet as she lay cradled in some noble stallion’s warm embrace, she still felt safe.
The last tears soon dried, but he continued to soothe away the pain and whisper sweet nothings in her ear. As she left his grasp he removed a kerchief to dab at her eyes. She must have looked terrible. Already she could feel the impending rat’s nest her mane had become, and crying for no good reason would have left her looking just awful. Rarity would have a field day if she ever caught her in such a state. “I’m s-sorry for that.”
“Oh, it’s nothing, little one. There is no shame in acknowledging weakness. Don’t think for a second myself or your friends think any less of you for that.” She let him finish cleaning her up. Stepping away, he sat on his haunches and and awaited the lady’s needs. She almost smiled. If Rarity had ever had a stallion be so attentive, she’d be over the moon.
“I see him whenever I close my eyes... When I sleep. When I’m awake...” She clutched her head and shook it hard enough in hopes the memories would fly off into some darkened space and be forgotten forevermore. “Make him stop. Please, make him stop...”
Is this what she had been reduced to? Begging some stallion as if panhandling for bits? Hurt still tugged at her heart when he shook his head. “Bitter memories are one thing that time cannot erase so easily, Miss Fluttershy. It takes patience and healing, and even then, a scar always remains. They won’t leave no matter how far you go, little one.”
Flashes of memory burst into her mind. Canterlot strewn with panicked screams and rubble in the streets. The stench of burning flesh that summoned carrion for a disgusting and abominable feast. Rarity, howling in agony to the smoky skies choked with ash of buildings and the fallen. A corpse still warm to the touch, its skin burnt while a pair of eyes bled accusations into her soul.
Fluttershy gave a squeak of pain as her flanks impacted the hard hard floor, ripping away the memory. The blankets ensnared her in their tight, serpentine grasp. With a shake, she removed them and backed her rump into the corner. The end table shook slightly, the little trinkets on the surface rattling at the contact.
Her eyes were drawn to her sleeping friend, yet Applejack did not wake. She slept like the dead. That was A-okay, but Fluttershy had to force herself to put down the limb that so desperately wished to shake her awake.
Her breaths were coming in staccato gasps. In the small sleeping compartment every sound came crashing back. This place was small, very unlike her own home that had the smell of earth, a warm fire, and Angel’s furry hugs. She shut her eyes to stop the swaying, yet everything seemed dizzy and moving. Feeling bile in her throat, Fluttershy’s eyes landed on the door.
Out... Too cramped! Need to think!
The door opened with a hiss. Fresh, cool air hit Fluttershy and she gasped for breath. As she cantered out the door, a fresh wave of vertigo hit and the ceiling became the floor. Pain shot through her side and jaw.
“Ow...” she moaned. Angel must have left one of his projects out again. Blinking back the blurriness and getting back on all four shaky hooves, she saw it was not one of Angel’s ill-gotten construction pieces and instead more plated flooring. A tiny splotch of red clung to to the silver, joining the miasma of mars that stained the floor. She put a hoof to her cheek. It stung, but it wasn’t bad.
A loud hiss blasted her from behind. “Eep!” she squeaked and backed her rump into the opposite wall. No snakes or angry chimera heads. Just the door closing...
Fluttershy closed her eyes to get her breathing under control. It always seemed to help, not being able to see, even though not seeing danger was generally frowned upon. Rainbow Dash always told her to never be scared. Being scared just happened to be something she was very good at.
She took a deep breath and relaxed, the very same mental exercise Cadance and Twilight performed.
In...
Out...
Inhale...
Exhale...
Slowly but surely, her limbs ceased trembling, yet the still image of the Dratalli still hid in the back of her mind. Fluttershy shook her head to clear the image.
She blinked. Light streamed in through an open double doorway farther down the hallway. As she perked her ears instinctively, she heard light clicking sounds. Someone else was awake. Looking down the opposite end of the corridor confirmed all other doors were firmly closed. The gentle, lifeless hum of the ship’s interior mechanics was the only constant other than the high thrumming of electric emergency lights.
“Applejack...?” she questioned softly as if her already demure voice and the wall were no obstacles to her call. She chided herself. Of course she couldn’t hear her. She was asleep on top of everything. Why would she need to wake her friend anyway? It was just someone else up. Even Angel got up in the middle of the night to get a drink sometimes. No need waking Applejack. It was best if she got all the sleep she could. As long as it was someone else, or better yet somepony else.
Just not something else...
The lightest hoofsteps echoed almost noiselessly across the narrow interior. Her head was hunched low enough to let the tips of her bubblegum-pink mane drag on the floor. There was an earthy scent in the air. It smelled familiar, but was unlike anything she could remember. As she approached the doorway, her legs locked up. A shadow had passed in front of her, casting a very human-looking silhouette. Despite confirming it as not some horrible creature that bred nightmares and ate fillies, that old sense of fear was back.
Unoiled metal protested loudly from within; whoever it was had sat down. ‘It’s not some monster, silly filly. Just a person who can’t sleep. Like you! Maybe you both have something to talk about...’ She couldn’t stop those eyes from coming back to the forefront of her mind.
“Someone there? You alright?” The insomniac moved again, the shadow craning its neck; its owner had noticed something. “You crying?”
Fluttershy dabbed at her eyes. No tears, only dreams. Bad dreams. Maybe a few pitiful moans as well. “No...” she managed to squeak out.
“Come again?” Male? He sounded nice enough, if a little groggy. The insomniac set something down.
“No.”
“Was that a no?” he asked.
“N-no. I mean yes!”
He paused in contemplation, his shadow scratching his chin. Fluttershy stood just outside the open doorway. She could smell other scents now. Grains, water, and salt, mostly. Looking up, it all made sense. Printed in neat black letters above the double doorway were the words: MESS HALL.
Fluttershy slowly peaked her head around the corner. “Hey there,” came the response. Dozens upon dozens of tables were neatly aligned to her right. The tables themselves looked like they were white a long time ago, but had been stained a murky gray over the years. Steel bars held each one to the floor with the help of several large metal bolts. The bars curled outward, ending in a plastic bench for crewmembers to sit on.
The only occupant in the room sat at the table closest to the door. He wasn’t too old, possibly middle-aged if she had to hazard a guess. Certainly younger than the soldier she met the previous day, but plenty older than Ana. He was dressed in a simple gray shirt that looked like it had seen several days of consistent wear. The cargo pants looked like they received the same treatment, as the dual empty toolbelts attested. Draped over his broad shoulders was an orange coat and it also came equipped with several pockets, these ones bulging with devices. Underneath his shaggy black bangs and curly beard were warm brown eyes. A disarming smile snuck through all the fur.
“...H-hey...” Fluttershy pawed at the floor nervously. Looking at anything other than him, she examined her left. It looked like the cafeteria she had in school down to the shelves locking away their precious contents. Rainbow Dash had made weekly attempts to nick food from the pantry during flight school, just to see if she could.
That same earthy scent caught her nose. It made her head buzz with energy, clearing away the fog incurred from sleep. There was fresh coffee in a pot on the counter. The man turned his head and spotted what she was looking at. “Want a cup? I’ve already made a fresh batch. Don’t think I’m up to finishing a pot on my own.”
He seemed nice. Not mean at all, just kind of big and scary-looking, just like Harry the Bear. “Okay.” Fluttershy swore she whispered, but he still heard her. The table creaked noisily as he adjusted his weight and walked to the pot with long, even strides. He opened one of the cabinets and removed one of the cups, grabbing the pot on his way back.
“Name’s Henry Stanford.”
Fluttershy carefully took a step inside. It was soon followed by another, then another. Without even realizing it, she had joined him at the table. “I’m... Fluttershy.”
He chuckled merrily. He sounded nice; another good sign. Maybe she was right and he just wanted some company. Fluttershy hopped up onto the bench only for her hooves to slide wildly across the surface and slipped backwards. The cry of alarm and fright was already past her lips before she stopped moving altogether. All she saw was the flickering fluorescent lights as she lay suspended.
“Careful; table and seats have been worn smooth by now.” She didn’t even see him move! Henry was halfway over the table, a large, calloused hand wrapped around her foreleg, the only thing keeping her from tumbling backwards and cracking her skull on the hard floor and certainly not staring into the eyes of Dratalli looking over her.
Henry pulled her forward just enough for her to get situated comfortably, or as comfortably as she could. The long, flat surface wasn’t quite right for ponies. Nothing on this ship was. “Thank you, Henry.”
He gave her another bass chuckle, his eyes glittering like beetles in all that hair. “‘s nothing. Just watch out for yourself. The ship’s safe enough, but it’s the things you don’t see coming that hurt the most.”
Soon the warm smell of coffee greeted her as he poured her a generous amount. Nodding gratefully, Fluttershy tipped the cup to her lips before asking, “What time is it?”
“I’d say about four,” he said quietly. Danger averted, he seemed lost in his own thoughts. “Alarm’s set for five for most of the crew to wake up, so don’t worry about waking them just yet. Still, there’s always someone up. No rest for the weary.” He took a strong draft, draining half of his cup in just a few gulps. His own cup had been sitting there for a while if it had cooled off so much. “Sorry, no proper mugs on this boat.”
“Oh? Oh! No, it’s fine.” Fluttershy down a few sips of her own. Well, it was the earthy scent she detected. Not much could be said for taste. It was like Sugarcube Corner’s chocolate-covered coffee beans if they’d been left out for about a month.
Something must have shown on her face. “Yeah, blue collars don’t normally spring for the little perks. Good coffee is one of them.”
He continued to nurse his own cup, eyes off in the distance. Fluttershy sat there quietly as she took gulp after gulp. It certainly wasn’t the best, and definitely not what she was used to, but she could get used to it with a little time. Having little else to do, she eyed her companion a little more. He did kinda look like a bear. He had a strong jawline and a wide nose that looked too large for his face. The curly brown mustache hairs made it look like a mountain poking out of a forest.
“Can’t sleep either?” Henry’s voice jolted her out of her observations. The best course of option was to, of course, sink as deep into her cup as possible and hope he didn’t take offense for the stareing.
“No...” She downed another nip only to realize her cup was empty.
“Here,” he said, pouring her another cup and refilling his own.
“Thanks.”
“Not a problem, Fluttershy...” Henry trailed off again. “I can never sleep right on these boats.” Fluttershy tucked a lock of hair behind an ear to see him better. He had his head in a palm as he stared off into a wall. He didn’t seem sad or upset. “Just never felt right. I don’t like space. Even if there’s people right down the hall, I could never feel right. It always feels too different, too wrong somehow.”
He set his cup down. He hadn’t even touched a drop since his refill. “No matter how much I get along with the crew, I can’t shake it. It’s cold out here...”
Fluttershy tightened her grip on her cup. Why was he telling her this? The feeling of isolation was apparent on the ship from the start. Despite dozens coming and going when she and Applejack packed up for the night, most didn’t give them a second thought. It made her feel like being in the middle of Ponyville Square, with all of town mingling on the eve of the Summer Sun Celebration... and still feeling so very alone.
Down went another draft of lukewarm coffee down her throat. Henry had tightened his coat around his form. Well, this had gotten a little too personal really fast. Unless he was talking literally, in which she was grateful she had a nice fur coat to help her stay warm.
“Um... do you have any friends on the ship?” Fluttershy asked timidly.
He shook his head slowly. “Nah; just a grunt who goes where the work is. No family.”
“My friend Applejack helped me a lot.” Henry perked up, brow curled in confusion as he tried to guess where she was going with this line of thought. “She helps me when I feel like that. Sometimes I feel so alone I think no pony can help. She even tells—”
Back to the cup. He didn’t need to know that. No siree.
Her new friend had guessed the source of her discomfort. The warmth of his hand touched her hoof. She could feel the residual heat from the cup radiating off him. “I... heard what happened in Equestria.”
Fluttershy flinched. Henry removed his hand, seemingly unsure if he offended her in some manner. The nightmares came and went as quickly as Ponyville weather changed. Dratalli invasion, the blood, the losses. Those eyes staring back at her...
Nevertheless, he continued. “I understand; I really do. War, no; I’ve never been through that, and please don’t take offense when I say I hope I never do.” At least he was honest. Fluttershy didn’t want to force that on anypony or anyone else. Even a Dratalli. Even if they deserved it.
He rubbed the back of his head as if enough pressure would reveal the answers. “It’s that need to run, even if you don’t know why. I can’t say it’s going to be better, but...”
Henry trailed off, words failing him. The barest hint of anger puffed at her chest. How could he possibly know what she went through? Or even suggest it? So what if she ran away from Equestria! No more monsters, no more memories, no more monsters, no more memories no more memories no more monsters no morememoriesnomoremonstersnomorememories—
‘They won’t leave no matter how far you go, little one.’
The waterworks were already coming before she could stop them. White hot tears streamed down her face and she hurriedly wiped her face with a forehoof. “I’m sorry; I don’t know why that happened. I’m... not used to the coffee and the bed’s really uncomfortable.”
Something soft dabbed at her face. Henry had pulled a handkerchief from one of his many pockets and dabbed at her eyes gently. For a moment he opened his mouth to say something, only to close it as words failed him. Together the sat in silence, only the cold he dreaded so much nipping at her mind.
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Edited by: TheSynn