Chapter 1
Keeping the Demon in Check
Garden Rave remembers the day she first saw Discord; clear as that blistering, afternoon sky. Her filly-hood teacher took the class on a tour of the Canterlot Castle’s garden. It was unusually hot out that day, at least for March, and still being a budding art hobbyist at the time, she was impressed by the skill of the sculptor in their art. However, in comparison to him, all the other statues were all a bit drab and similar to one another. Somehow, she knew that he was no ordinary statute. He was too unusual and real. She had to ask to see if she wasn’t imagining this feeling.
“Ms. Peachbottom, who’s the artist of Discord?”
“Oh! ...um,” she looked around for the artist’s name on the plaque to no avail, “That’s a great question, Garden. Though I’m afraid I don’t know! Now this next statue is a skillful,” and Garden tuned her out.
While everyone else was walking away, following the teacher on her little tour, Garden stayed behind, still staring at Discord.
“He seems so triumphant,” she idly thought. “I wonder why I feel… connected to him?”
Little did she know that the connection she felt was the red string of fate.
Years later, with the addition of a loose-leaf writing sheet with a five petaled lilac blossom cutie mark, Garden wandered to the foot of Discord’s statue, and sighed in frustration and fatigue.
“Honey, I’m home,” she tiredly chimed and chuckled sadly.
Celestia was just finishing up the long day, and Luna was preparing to begin the night. A tired squirrel clawed up it’s tree for the night. A nightingale was singing far off in the distance. A couple bunnies hopped into a bush. Everyone was ready to go home, and Garden felt envious of that luxury she felt was denied to her.
“It’s not fair, Discord. I figured out today that even though my special talent is teaching, it’s better that I don’t become one after all,” she began bitterly, “Today, I got really mad at that one colt that I’ve told you about. You know, the one that tends to wander instead of doing his work. Well, today he was flirting with one of his classmates and with my stupid temper, I got in a verbal fight with him. It got really heated and before I could stop her, Rave decided to make her first official appearance in quite sometime,” she went on, shaking with emotion, “And I was getting all excited thinking she was gone from me,” her voice cracking with tears. She pressed her hooves to her neon orange eyes, trying in vain to stop the tears from falling. Dark blue swirls, a physical manifestation of raw sadness, were making their slow tumble out of her horn.
She forced herself to continue, “I don’t want to pass on this disease to another soul like it was to me. This cycle of hatred and anger needs to stop with somepony, so it should be me. But why do I have to be chained from my dream?!” she screamed with a stomp of her hooves and eyes squinted shut. The swirls were beginning to pool around her, creeping slowly toward Discord’s statue. He was growing anxious for freedom at long last.
Lifting her head, she took a deep breath and continued, “I mean, I get that it’s a bad idea to even risk spreading the beast to somepony else, but it still sucks that I have give up the dream I’ve been having since I got my cutie mark! Why did those...those monsters have to do this to me?! Why couldn’t they be the ones to be done away with this demon?! Why was I gifted with these abilities, but never able to use them as they should be, just because they couldn’t stop their urges?! And why can’t I control even myself?!” she screamed to the whole universe, and especially to herself.
That’s when Garden finally opened her eyes to see that she was being buried in the blue swirls. She realized that she wasn’t just feeling sadness, she was drowning in it. The swirls were growing so dense, that what little light she had was fading fast. She needed to get out of there. Fast. She was so petrified with panic that she couldn’t move. Her mind racing too fast for sense. She had never let it get this bad before. She usually was able to keep the swirls from spilling out long enough to vent them into one of her crafts. But, swirls were more crippling than she had ever experienced before. She had no choice but let the raw emotion swallow her whole.
Memories of all the pet birds that she had accidentally killed from letting the swirls get out of control, came flooding. Memories of all the ponies that had tried to comfort her when she got like this as a filly. Her Magic Kindergarten teacher trying to hug her, walked right into the swarm, without seeing them, and was knocked out for a few seconds. Her best friend trying to do the same. She was only brushed by a single swirl, and didn’t stop crying for a solid 20 minutes. Her first memory of her father and sister fighting. The red lightning that he struck her with by accident, he meant to only get her sister. The first time that Garden tried to tell her family about the swirls, and none of them believing her. All the memories that brought her pain and shame and guilt came flooding back all at once. Everytime she had said something she didn’t mean, done something she now wish she hadn’t, all the names she had been called in passing, the lost friendships, her family that had been so close to destroyed and will never be whole again; every negative thought was strangling her.
“Please,” she shakily choked, “Please just make it stop…”
The swirls were creeping up Discord’s stand now. They would surely set him free at long last.
She wanted nothing more than to get out of that pain. She shoved desperately through the bitter thoughts, trying to find some memory, some sliver of knowledge to keep from dying. Her whole life flashed before eyes, scanning for something to at least ease the pain.
“Garden,” her mother had once said, “Whenever you are sad, you just go away for a bit and let all the tears fall that need to be let out. It’ll pass.” Her mother. She had said many wise and strange things to her youngest daughter.
“After you were born, I laid there on the bed while your father and the midwife were fighting. I was so tired, and I thought that I couldn’t possibly fulfill my silent promise to you to give you a younger sibling. I swear I heard a soft, child’s voice say to me, ‘No, Mom, I want to be born too.’ So I gave birth to your little brother after all. I guess that message he gave me from the other side used up his ability to talk when he came to this world.”
There were many other examples of Garden’s mother, Sea Sunshine, talking about “the other side”, and about a being far more powerful than all the alicorn princesses combined, and who was working all the time to keep Equestria from falling apart. If a being that created everything in the universe, and that works to this day to keep the world together and working, wouldn’t such a being help a pony when they couldn’t help themselves? It was a long shot, Garden had always brushed off her mother’s words in the past, but she was short on options. She put her head in her crossed forehooves like she often saw her mother do, and prayed with everything she had left.
“Please, if you’re really out there, please help me. I can’t do this alone. I feel so lonely and scared. Please release me from this fear and guilt.”
All of a sudden, a spark inside her heart ignited a fire that exploded into a blaze. A yellow flame that felt so vast in it’s peacefulness, that somewhere in her head Garden thought she should be nervous. But she was too eerily calm to even care. The calm was too complete, too steady to be from Garden’s own will, and she knew it. She looked down to see her heart glowing through her fur, flickering with a flame that moved like a candle, yet was as big as a bonfire. Remembering the swirls, she searched the area, to see that they were all gone, and nothing had changed. She practically melted with relief. Getting up, feeling lighter than air, Garden trotted home finally able to sleep.
Discord: Damn you, Miss Heather! I will be free, yet!
Me: Key word: yet.
Garden: Heather, you’ve got enough of a self-insert as is. Go away.
Me: But it progressed the story! >:3 *mischievous giggle*
Garden: *rolls eyes*
That night, Garden’s sleep was deep, but her dreams were divided.
Garden walked heavily into an enormous, empty, and dark throne room. There was nothing in there except for a throne on the back wall, and a gargantuan mirror that almost took up the whole left wall. She was trying to hide from her own guilt, away from prying eyes.
“No one must ever know I’ve done,” she said, “No one must ever know about her existence.” Turning towards the mirror, she looked regretfully at her reflection and continued, “Am I a good mare, or am I crazy?” She hung her head and sighed, “Why is there such a fine line between the two?”
“Don’t even try and pretend that I’ve left, my friend,” a chillingly familiar voice said inside the mirror. Garden flinched away from what she saw in the mirror. She didn’t want to believe what she saw. “You keep on forgetting that you will never get away from me,” the image laughed cruelly. It looked a little like Garden, it was her at all. It was the demon.
“You’re just a face in a mirror!”
“I’m the face that you will forever have to face.”
Garden walked away from the mirror, “You won’t be able to live much longer,” she stomped her hoof, “I swear, I will be rid of you tonight, Rave! You’re just a bad dream!”
“This isn’t just a dream, friend,” image laughed and stepped out of the mirror. Sliding out of the image like it were water, the ruffled version of Garden’s mane and tail, the rumpled fur, the piercing red eyes with black corneas, the warped flower of Garden’s cutie mark, all came into reality. “It doesn’t matter what you want to believe, I’m here to stay, even when you die,” the twisted copy sneered, and advanced on a fuming Garden, who whipped around to face her.
“You will die, and my silence will assure you will be forgotten.”
“You can’t hide me away, I’m inside you. I’m part of you!”
“I don’t need you, like you need me,” she said, advancing on Rave, standing firmly at her full height, “I will become complete as you wither away!”
In answer, she seemed to grow a little bigger, standing taller than Garden, and smiled a demented smile to reveal a set of fangs. “I will live inside you forever!” she yelled in Garden’s face, making her back away. Rave pulled out a chain from inside her chest. It changed to the floor, giving her a chain long enough to lasso a pony, “And there’s nothing you can do to stop me!” Like a black mamba, the chained whipped towards Garden in a flash, burying the last link deep within her chest. The sheer force of the impact sent her stumbling back, giving a yelp of pain.
Biting back the sting, Garden continued to back way, but retaliated, “Can’t you see? It’s time for you you to die!” a little of her fear creeping into her voice.
“No, but it is time for you to leave,” she said advancing victoriously.
“If I die, you die too!” she was growing desperate, as she bumped into the wall opposite of the mirror.
Rave grabbed a bit of the chain, “You’ll die in me, I’ll be you!” and wrapped it behind Garden’s head, pulling her closer.
“Damn you, Rave! Set me free!” she screamed desperately.
“Can’t you see, you are me!” she screamed back, laughing.
“No,” she shook her head, “NO!” and shook it harder. “Just go rot in Tartarus!”
“See you there, Garden!” and she pointed her sharpened horn at her throat, ready to strike, red lightning fizzling around it.
“Be still,” said a deep, booming, yet calm voice that sent chills down both their spines, and Rave fled inside Garden. The damage had been done, and now Garden’s heart was chained to Rave, and she was powerless to free herself.
“Fear not. I’m here to save you,” startling Garden out of thought, and looked up to see a young stallion standing before her. He wasn’t remarkable in any immediate way: his almost navy blue mane and tail were short and unassuming, and his coat was a slightly lighter blue. The only thing that made this stallion exceptional, was his cutie mark: a dark red heart with a white cross inside it, but not the kind common among medical ponies, and Garden felt nervous in his presence. She could sense that this stallion knew her better than anypony else, that he knew about that one time that she did something she knew she would get in trouble for, and blamed it on her little brother, something that she was deeply ashamed of.
He cupped her face gently and said, “I say again, I’m here to save you, and you are never beyond repair.”
In a moment, all the stress in Garden’s shoulders left her, and her heart slowed to a contented thump. Thump. Thump.
All of a sudden, several ponies entered the throne room, which was slowly growing lighter, making them easier to see. They were all ordinary Earth ponies, with average, unassuming cutie marks. However, they all had these wings made of the soft reflection of candle light. Garden had only heard of angel ponies from her mother a few times, it was different to see them for herself. They were all singing a gentle but moving tune as they lifted themselves and Garden up through the disappearing ceiling into the clouds, with sun just barely starting to rise. They sang all the while about the glory and beauty and infinite wisdom of God.
As the angels set Garden gently onto a cloud, the Messiah stepped onto the cloud and walked towards her with a flame burning within his chest; much like the blaze that had been in her in front of Discord’s statue, with a warm, comforting glow. He stopped in front of her, staring warmly into her eyes, like husband might admire his wife, or a father might look in favor on his beloved child, but even more completely loving and intimate.
Lifting a hoof up to his chest, he plucked the fire within him, and moved it towards Garden, giving her a chance to stare in wonder and awe. There it hovered, it’s sluggish flickering and blazing form dancing in her eyes.
“I offer you my spirit and my strength with it,” the Messiah tenderly intoned, “Do you accept it?”
“I do,” she whispered, still wonderstruck.
Slowly, he moved his spirit to her chest, and delicately pressed it into her chest. The flame consumed her heart, cleansing it from all the years of heartache, every regret washed away, and for a moment, Garden felt more complete than she could ever remember feeling. The flames rose, and rose higher, until they morphed into angel wings. The wings flapped of their own will, joined with her will. Into the multitude of angels she flew, joining the final verse of the song, throwing her whole heart into the crescendo, until the abrupt end.
In the breathless silence that followed, a small applause brought the attention to the protector of the night, Princess Luna, and everything faded into a place filled with white nothingness.
“Princess Luna! So I really am just dreaming, that’s a little disappointing.”
“I’m sure it is. Sorry to interrupt such a pleasant dream.”
“N-no, thank you for ‘dropping by’,” she chuckled nervously.
A chuckle that Luna shared to ease the lilac purple unicorn’s nerves. “You have such a lovely singing voice, you must be the pony that she mentioned,” she mused quietly.
“...That who mentioned, your majesty?”
“...Nevermind, I’d like to formally ask thee to make an appearance at the Grand Galloping Gala this year,” she stated, slipping a little a bit into her Royal Canterlot Voice. Despite Garden’s training in dealing with upset parents, she was a little unnerved from the volume so close to her face.
“‘An appearance’, your majesty?” she asked, feeling uncertain.
“YES!” Luna exclaimed, making Garden visibly wince. She cleared her throat and consciously went back into her normal talking voice, “I mean, yes. My sister put me in charge of finding the entertainment for the night, and I’ve been looking for a singer.”
This surprised Garden into silence for a moment, as she tried to wrap her head around, what that entailed exactly.
“Oh! So you want me to sing at the Gala?” Luna nodded. “What an honor! I’d love to, your majesty! Is there any particular song you would like me to sing?”
“Yes, there is one…”
The next morning, dazed and amazed, Garden Rave found herself standing in Canterlot Castle’s ballroom. She was about ready to faint from the amazing and terrifying opportunity for her to show off one of her lesser known skills. She had prided herself in having a decent voice in the past, despite being turned down multiple times to solo, during all the choir concerts she was part of in college. But to get the attention of the returned Princess Luna, and being asked to perform in front of hundreds of ponies. It took all of her willpower to not let her emotions get the best of her. But her head was spinning so fast!
“Good evening, everypony,” Luna announced, making sure to keep her voice down enough to frighten anypony.
“Good evening, Princess Luna,” intoned a red-tan Earth mare, as she bowed to Luna, along with the other ponies there.
“Ms. Harshwhinny, this is your new lead singer, Garden Rave.”
She looked Garden up and down with a critical eye, giving no noticeable sign of approval.
“Ms. Harshwhinny,” Luna interjected in the uncomfortable tenseness between the red-tan and lavender ponies, “I would love to stay, but I must go to bed for the day. Would you take over from here.”
“Of course your majesty,” she assured with a low bow, “Ms. Rave here,” Garden flinched at the name, “Is well taken care of.”
As Luna regally walked out of the room, Garden turned to Ms. Harshwhinny and pleaded, “If you could, Ms. Harshwhinny, would you mind calling me ‘Garden’ or ‘Ms. Garden’ instead of ‘Ms. Rave’?”
With a huff and a slight glare, she replied, “I don’t see why you insist on breaking such a rule,” Garden gave a flat look at the floor, “However, since you are so polite about it I suppose there will be no problems in bending this rule, Ms. Garden,” she sighed in relief, “But know that I am not your friend, and I will not bend anymore rules for you!” Ms. H snapped.
“I don’t expect you to, ma’am,” Garden half chuckled, “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome, Ms. Garden. Now allow me to introduce the ponies on this group so far,” she rushed, muttering about how overly long she would have to work on this project.
Royal Riff, Garden’s back up singer, and a slightly more well built stallion, was quiet and easy to talk to. Everything about him, from the faded lavender coat and wispy, snow white mane and tail, spoke of gentleness, but too average to stand out.
Goldshy, the piano player, was quiet, only saying enough to acknowledge Garden’s presence and coldly refused to say another word. His coat was a dull tan, and his mane was an off-white cream. His eyes were a sharp green, that seemed to silently judge you.
Noteworthy, was an earth pony, stallion that was the most unremarkable of all the stallions, at least to anypony other than Garden. She recognized this pony as the Messiah from her dream the night before. The only difference being that Noteworthy’s cutie mark was two sets of one-eighth notes. The thought of what the presence of this pony might mean made her heart pound.
“This is Noteworthy, and he in charge of the sound system. Mr. Noteworthy, this is the chosen lead singer, Garden Rave,” Ms. H rushed through, now quite done with making all the formal introductions, muttering about how she should be more efficient in the future about introducing everypony to each other, as she trotted off to take care of something.
“Good to see the Princess was so timely in finding somepony to be the star.”
“I’m only surprised to see that she’s planning so far in advance.”
“Yeah,” he chuckled, “Pretty early, if you ask me. Though I’m never against having the extra money for all the bills.”
“Indeed,” she said adding her squeaky, hiccupping giggle, raising a hoof in modesty.
“Even when she was getting all excited over my wings, she looked kind of mean!” Garden giggled in remembrance of her “professional” gushing. She was back at the foot of Discord, as she seemed to do more frequently lately. “I guess she not named ‘Harshwhinny’ for nothing,” and she couldn’t help but giggle harder at the memory. Then her thoughts wandered back to Noteworthy
“Noteworthy has quite the appropriate name, too, doesn’t he. Kinda weird how he looked so much like the pony from my dream, right? I don’t know, it just seems kinda… well, noteworthy the timing of me meeting him. Note to self: definitely keep your eye on the blue one.” A long pause. “Huh… and to think that I would have been scared of his blue coat just yesterday,” she half whispered in disbelief at herself.
She looked down at her chest, remembering the flaming heart that she saw appear earlier that afternoon when her wings of light appeared for the first time in the real world, and she smiled crookedly.
Putting a hoof to her chest, she said, “He really did set my heart on fire. And I’m changing far faster than I thought possible.”
Meanwhile, at the entrance to the castle gardens, a dark blue unicorn stallion was convincing a friend of his to keep the garden clear of the nightly guards, so he might have a “romantic evening.”