//------------------------------// // Chapter Four - Plumbing, Magic, and Other Unfortunate Things // Story: Starswirl // by Dino Days //------------------------------// Twilight stepped through the doorway- and through Starswirl, who was too distracted by the yellow pegasus to move out of the way. We all know that Fluttershy takes care of animals, but Starswirl had no such preconceptions. All the talk of pest control frightened the slightly senile wizard, who assumed she was a ghost hunter and/or an exorcist. He examined her, wondering how a shy, adorable pony like her could get into such a nasty business. Fluttershy hung back as Twilight entered the castle, her legs shaking as though they were having trouble holding up her body. She stayed that way until Twilight pulled her in with her magic and shut the door. “Alright,” Twilight started, placing the pile of junk on the floor. “I read as many books as I could find in the local bookstore on the subject of ghosts as I can. Which isn’t much. Written Script really has to expand his inventory. What do the ponies in town do for books?” She coughed. “Um, anyway, like I was saying, I read all about ghosts, so I went out and bought a bunch of things that the books say will be useful in ghost-vanquishing. Hold this.” Twilight tossed the pony skull to Fluttershy, who shrieked and jumped behind a tapestry. The pony skull bounced on the thankfully soft carpeting of the floor, landing in an upright position. Twilight was too absorbed in her book to notice. “Now, we just need to start the chant and we can bind the ghost in this skull!” Twilight said. “Then we can do whatever we want with it. I cast my vote in the ‘throw it in the river’ corner.” She sat and drew a circle around the skull in chalk, then began chanting. “Gnitnahc gnidnuos-nital suonimo-” A small purple blur, covered in pots and pans for war, streaked out from a hallway. “Twilight the ghost is trying to burn the castle down you gotta do something!” it shouted as it raced past Starswirl. Oh wow, he was here this whole time? The little dragon ran up to Twilight and hugged her leg. “He set fire to the library and threw books all over the place to use as kindling! He’s a monster on a rampage! We have to stop hi- oh, hey Fluttershy, what are you doing here?” “...I’m not sure.” “Burned down the library?!” Twilight exclaimed, rushing up to check on the damage. “What does the ghost have against knowledge?!” Starswirl floated up through the ceiling to the second floor. Fluttershy and Spike shared a look before running after Twilight. Now, you’re probably wondering why Starswirl remained in the castle for so long. After all, he’s already frightened and angered a princess, and scared her dragon assistant, not to mention the fact that what he believed to be a ghost hunter was currently in the princess’ employ. You see, before Starswirl settled down to study in the princess’ expansive library, he had attempted to make his getaway, only to discover an invisible barrier of some sort keeping him from wandering more than a few metres from the castle. A few minutes of detective work later, and he found his journal, lying abandoned on the couch in the living room. He was unable to touch it, and quickly deduced that it was an anchor of sorts, keeping him from wandering too far. Which sucked, if you were to ask for his opinion. As long as Starswirl was stuck in the castle with the upset princess and dragon, he was going to keep an eye on them. The princess kicked open the door to the library and gasped. Starswirl had left the library in more of a mess than he realized. Books were strewn all across the floor, and the remains of the burned tapestry had been spread across the room by a breeze from an open window. “Oh my,” commented Fluttershy, who had just caught up to Twilight. “Have you considered... moving?” Starswirl floated around Twilight as they performed rituals and incantations in the vain hope of getting rid of him. While they were preoccupied with this, he occupied himself with testing the limits of what he was capable of. He first attempted to communicate with the princess. He spoke to her, then, when that failed, tried speaking directly into her ear. When that failed, he stuck his head inside of hers—a less exciting prospect than he had hoped, as it was too dark to see in there—and shouted. There was no response. He then tried using a quill and ink. She had some ready, laid neat and tidy on a desk in her library, and it would only be a matter of picking up the ultra-light feather, dipping it in the ink, and writing. This, however, was more difficult than he expected. His hooves weren’t capable of lifting, only a slight pushing, and the quill went fluttering to the floor. His attempts at magic were similarly ill-fated, and he ran out of strength before the quill could even be dipped into the ink. His attempts at writing had reminded him about his magical dilemma, and he spent a short amount of time attempting to solve that particular problem. He quickly gave up, however, when he realized he had no way to study his own magic without using it, and vowed to return to that line of research eventually. This is infuriating, he thought as he abandoned his magical musings. I feel so impotent. I can’t communicate properly, I can’t use magic, and I can hardly affect the world around me. Is this what Earth Ponies feel like on a daily basis? Starswirl came from a different time. When his testing of himself failed to stave off his boredom, he turned to exploring the world around him. The princess was performing some sort of ritual with a tree branch topped with a gemstone, the little baby dragon holding up the piece of wood as she chanted something in a long-dead language. Fluttershy was sitting with her back to a wall, looking back and forth in fright. Starswirl floated up to her and went to examine her. She was pretty, with a long mane and bright blue eyes.  Her being a pegasus baffled him. Weren’t most ghost hunters unicorns? Starswirl passed his hoof through her face, and the mare flinched a bit, shivering. “I guess I can affect the world a bit,” he muttered to himself. He floated straight through her, and she shivered some more. He took satisfaction knowing that he could actually affect other ponies in some way, even if it were only a momentary chill. After he passed through her, he found himself in the wall. He examined some metal rods that he had found when he was passing through the wall earlier. The wizard passed a hoof back and forth through them, wondering about their purpose. Were they structural? Being from a time long passed, Starswirl wasn't aware of the concept of ‘indoor plumbing’. As he passed his hoof through them, he felt something loosen. The rod started to bulge at one end, and he backed up. “Uh oh." The pipe burst a moment later. Fluttershy jumped up and screamed as the pipe burst inside the wall, startling her. After seeing what happened with the pipes, Starswirl stayed far away from the electrical wires he found.   Twenty-three ancient rituals, fifteen talismans and a four-minute rant on how rude it was to haunt people later, and nothing had worked in expelling Starswirl from Twilight’s castle. It had gone on until late into the night, and the moon was high in the sky. Spike had fallen asleep and now lay curled up by Twilight’s side. Fluttershy, surprisingly, was doing rather well, considering she currently sat in a haunted castle. Surprisingly well for Fluttershy doesn’t mean much, though. She was hiding underneath the table in the large dining room they had moved to, the tablecloth hiding her from the world… just as she had been since the twelfth ancient ritual, involving the seventh talisman—one of Zebrican make—and a small yet delightfully colourful explosion. She occasionally spoke up when Twilight said something to her. For her part, Twilight was lying on the ground, frustrated. “Nothing is working! There are so many books on ghosts, and they’re all wrong!” She flipped through the book she was holding in her magic. “W-well, how would you know if it worked?” Fluttershy asked from the confines of her table fortress. “What if it left and we didn’t notice?” “That’s actually a good point,” Twilight conceded. “I guess I assumed something dramatic would happen when it did work.” It hadn’t worked. Starswirl was floating above the trio, talking to himself. “...and that third talisman was broken, you could clearly see the scratches on the inscription. The fourth talisman wasn’t even magical, it was just a necklace, my mother had one just like it. And...” He went on like that for a while. Needless to say nopony heard him. Fluttershy crawled out from underneath the table. “So, do you think it’s gone?” she asked, nervously glancing from side to side as though that would help her figure out whether or not the invisible ghost was still around. “Maybe,” Twilight responded, sounding unsure. “There’s one more book here. I’d feel better if we cast the spell in here first.” She opened the last book and started to read. Fluttershy shuffled her hooves. “Um, Twilight? I should probably go take care of my animals...” Twilight looked up from her book, a small frown on her face. “Huh? Oh, yeah, I guess you do,” she acquiesced. “Listen, Fluttershy, I’m sorry I brought you into this. I guess I was just afraid, and with everypony else busy, I wanted to have somepony by my side during all this.” “But you do have somepony, Twilight. What about Spike?” She glanced at the little baby dragon. Spike was snoring loudly beside Twilight, still wearing his pot-and-pan armour. “Um, I guess not,” Fluttershy said. “It’s okay, Fluttershy. Go,” she urged. “We’ve been here for hours and no ghost has made an attempt on my life yet. I’ll be fine.” Twilight didn’t need to tell her twice. Fluttershy quickly opened up a window and flew out, not wanting to walk through the dark lower levels of the castle on her own. Twilight sighed and put the book down, ready to cast the last ghost-banishing spell she had. Her horn glowed as she charged her magic and shaped the spell in her mind, a bright magenta light practically pouring off in waves. Starswirl watched. “It’s not going to work,” he commented. “That spell requires much more power than you’ve got. May-” A bright flash of light blinded the two as the spell was finished. “-be if this castle was on a leyline, you could succeed,” he finished. Twilight shrieked and whirled around, staring at Starswirl with wide eyes. Starswirl looked behind him, confused, then turned back to Twilight and pointed to himself. “Can you see me?” “Ghost! Why are you still here?! That was a banishing spell!” “I don’t feel particularly banished.” Starswirl looked at himself. “But you can see me, which is new. I guess it partly worked.” “Get out of my house! Or am I going to have to stop you again, Som...bra...” Twilight trailed off as she looked over the floating wizard. His pointy hat, long, flowing beard, and cloak were not the crown, fangs and cape she expected from Sombra. In fact, Twilight started to realize that the ghost in front of her wasn’t Sombra at all. “About that...” the ghost started. “I’m... not actually Sombra...” Twilight’s jaw was agape as she realized who she was talking to, her wings drooping to her side. “I’m really very sorry,” Starswirl continued. “I thought it would be funny.”