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// hope beyond? 
// Story: Being of Two Minds 
// by cosmofur 
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Gentle Breeze stepped into the Ponyville Clinic to find the lobby mobbed with guards. They had arrived at the same time as a new shift had started and their commander was debriefing them right in the main lobby. 

Very conscious of all the eyes watching her, she threaded her way between armored bodies of all sorts. Lyra and Bon Bon followed behind, seemingly even more nervous at the unusual sight than Gentle Breeze was. Most of these guards had come in from the outer cities and towns and had not been in Canterlot, but rumors were quickly spreading that the ‘patients’ in this hospital and angry furrowed brows followed each move the three mares made.  

Finally they made it to the reception desk, where a nurse pony was waiting for them. She gave them an uneasy smile and asked for their names.

With a tiny quiet voice the tattooed unicorn told the nurse, “I’m Gentle Breeze, here for treatment, and these two are the kind ponies who are letting me stay with them for now, Lyra and Bon Bon.”

The nurse quickly found Gentle Breeze’s name in her schedule, “Oh good, you’re a bit early for your treatment. Nurse Tender Care should be out shortly. Normally I’d ask you to wait here in the main lobby, but with all these guards here, you might feel better waiting upstairs? There’s some chairs for patients families just outside the treatment rooms. I’ll make sure Nurse Tender Care finds you.” She pointed on a map of the clinic where they should wait.

Before leaving though, Gentle Breeze caught the nurses eye again and asked, “Could you tell me what room my husband Red Wood is in?”

Another glance at her papers, and the nurse told Gentle Breeze. “Your husband? Hmm. OK Mr Red Wood is in room 221 in the same wing as your treatments on. You’ll have to pass near his room on your way. As long as the floor nurse agrees you can stop to visit, but don’t stay long, you don’t want to miss your treatment.”

Gentle Breeze smiled brightly at the nurse and quickly moved to the stairs. As the three mares climbed to the second floor, Bon Bon asked, “Why does  your husband still needs to be in the hospital and not an outpatient like you?  Did he get hurt?”

Gentle Breeze froze for a moment as the implication of the question struck her for the first time. “I don’t know, last I saw him we were having our first treatment together, and he had only been under the Cults control for around one day. I haven’t seen him since then. Sompony told me he helped Princess Twilight save some foals, but no one seemed to know more than that.”

The layout of the hospital wing they were on, was two long corridors with the patient rooms down the outer sides and the space between the two hallways used for utility rooms, offices and nurses stations. Red Wood’s room was about halfway down one side, but just a few paces beyond his room, signs and a temporary barrier detoured all foot traffic through a pantry to the other hallway. Stationed at this barrier were two stern looking earth ponies who gave the three mares cold stares as they walked closer. 

Luckily they didn’t have to cross over to reach Red Wood’s room, it was the last open door before the blockade. 

Lyra stepped in first while Gentle Breeze paused a moment to gather her thoughts. Before she could really clear her head, she heard Lyra say, “Oh! He has a private room. That’s nice, but I would prefer somepony to talk to.”

Gentle Breeze stepped in with Bon Bon following. As Lyra said, it was a private room, with the usual generic utilitarian furniture centered around a large hospital bed.  Gentle Breeze wasn’t there to critique the design elements though, her eyes locked on the sleeping stallion in that bed. 

Red Wood looked small and shrunken by the large bed. Gentle Breeze had started to fear he had been hurt and would be hooked up to all sorts of pipes and tubes, but currently he seemed free of these. But he looked ill. His face was full of wrinkles and was gaunt looking. His breathing seemed ragged with drawn out unhealthy snores punctuated with broken gasps as if he was choking. 

Bon Bon and Lyra stood to the side together, whispering quietly while Gentle Breeze stepped closer and wondered out loud, “He looks so weak, do you think we should wake him?”

Suddenly a firm but friendly voice answered her from the door. “Oh dear, if you could that would be wonderful!” 

The mares turned to the voice and Nurse Tender Care stood there. She nodded in greeting to Gentle Breeze and asked, “Are you family?” towards Bon Bon and Lyra.

Lyra smiled and just answered “Nope!” with a grin on her face.

Bon Bon waited a heartbeat to see if Lyra would elaborate, when the green unicorn didn’t she face hoofed and added for her, “Gentle Breeze is staying with us, and we wanted to keep her company.” 

Nurse Tender Care smiled, “That’s nice, times like these, it’s good to have friends nearby.”

Gentle Breeze asked, “What’s wrong with my husband? Why does he look so sick?”

The nurse looked over at the stallion in the bed. “It’s a real shame. He had only just had one treatment when he risked his life to help save a bunch of colts and fillies, but rather than be welcomed back as a hero, he ran into a crowd of very scared ponies. They yelled at him and blamed him for the horrible things happening. “

Bon Bon asked “Did they hurt him? Was it a mob?”

Tender Care shook her head, “Not seriously, at least not physically, but that evil spell, the Cult’s curse, it was weakened by the first treatment, but not yet isolated or safe. In order to keep Cult members from diverging secrets, when the spell detects its being attacked, it tries to kill its host. Even in it’s weakened form, the spell was able to use the harsh words of the mob to spin Red Wood into a magically enhanced deep depression.”

Lyra asked, “But why don’t you remind him of the foals he saved or play him happy music or something?”

The nurse smiled sadly again, “We’ve tried, but the spell locked him in his own mind. He can’t hear or see us. It’s like he’s trapped in a nightmare, while the spell withers his body.” 

With a gasp the three mares moved closer to Red Wood. Gentle Breeze held onto his hoof and with her other hoof rubbed his head. “Please wake up!” she cried, “Red Wood! Wake up!”

Bon Bon asked, “Have you tried slapping him?” 

Before she could move though, the Nurse quickly said,  “PLEASE DON’T! We have tried physical stimulation, anti depressants and magic probes but we’ve not yet been able to break through the spell’s effect.” 

Lyra meanwhile took out from somewhere her harp and started to play it close to Red Wood’s head. She started softly, but with each strum of her strings, she increased the volume and speed until it started sounding more like a hard rock guitar riff than any recognizable mellady. 

Nurse Tender Care gave Lyra a hard glare and the unicorn lowered the volume, then for several minutes she watched the three mares attempt to awaken Red Wood. There was some hope that friends and family might be able to do what mere medicine couldn’t and break through to the Stallion. But she couldn’t stay long, so with a cough to draw attention to herself, the nurse said to Gentle Breeze, “You have your own treatment scheduled in a little while. Don’t rush, we can put it off for a few minutes. But when you’re ready meet me in room 244, it’s just across and down a bit.”

Gentle Breeze had tears streaming down her face at this point, but nodded quietly to the nurse before returning to the vain attempt to awaken Red Wood. 

The only reaction they could get was when Gentle Breeze touched his hoof, he moved his wrist to scoop her hoof into his. There was no other reaction, and with the nurse gone, there was no pony to ask if that was just a reflex of some sort. 

For several long minutes Gentle Breeze holding Red Wood’s hoof, but they knew the time was limited, so gentle she moved his hoof to the side, and with a quiet gesture motioned for Bon Bon and Lyra to walk with her outside. 

Outside in the hallway, they once again saw the two royal guards a few steps away. Still giving them leary glances. The three mares suspected the wrinkles on the guards faces was due to the noise they  had been making. Before anypony could apologize a new figure stepped between the two guards and looked out curiously.

It was Spike the dragon, he looked side to side until his eyes focused on Bon Bon and Lyra. Then Spike looked over his shoulder and called out, “It was just a few ponies from town, your Majesty, nothing to worry about.” Then he turned back to the three mares. “Please, the Princess Celestia is tired and you shouldn’t make so much noise in a hospital!”

“Sorry Spike!” Lyra told the dragon in a bright tone. “We just trying to help Gentle Breeze wake up her husband.”

At the same time, Bon Bon and Gentle Breeze stuttered, “Princess Celestia?”

Before Spike could reply a light motherly voice came from the private room beyond. “Ponies from town? Is it the element  bearers or their families? “

Spike turned to answer, “It’s one of the local musicians, Lyra and the town candy maker Bon Bon.” Spike paused while looking at the last mare, taking a moment to remember her name. “And Gentle Breeze, she’s one of the Cult victims ummm right she’s Red Wood’s wife.”

Princess Celestia’s voice rang softly from the room she was still in, “Oh my! Twilight mentioned that Red Wood’s wife had been found alive. That is amazing. Please Spike let them in. I wish to talk to them.”

Gentle Breeze and the other mares had heard the Princess’s request and before Spike could repeat it, they looked back and forth and give each other nervous nods in agreement. 

Spike bowed and said, “If you ladies will follow me, it would please the Princess if you would meet with her.” 

Lyra messed up Spike’s spikes with her hoof and grinned “Oh Spike you don’t have to ask us twice!” with her tail held high, she jointly trotted past the two frowning guards and into Princess Celestia’s room. 

“Wait for me Lyra!” Bon Bon followed, walking much more sedately but clearly anxious to see the Princess. 

Gentle Breeze paused, a little more than uncertain if she should go forward. A few days ago she was a sworn enemy of the Princess, and now she was being invited into her hospital room, like they were … Even in her own mind Gentle Breeze couldn’t come up with a good term to explain her feelings, other than she knew it was odd. 

The two guards continued to frown at Gentle Breeze and that started her moving. She nosed past them, and gave Spike a nervous look, and received a reassuring smile in return. Feeling a tiny bit better, Gentle Breeze turned the corner and entered Celestia’s private hospital room. 

Ponyville Clinic didn’t have the need or resources to keep an Alicorn sized guest room on standby at all times, so the private room Celestia was in, was no bigger than the one Red Wood had been in. The furniture was perhaps newer, a price tag and ripped remnants of packing paper was still stuck to the sides of the larger than normal bed and every flat surface was covered in flowers. 

But currently Cestia wasn’t using the bed, she was laying on a large embroidered cushion set by the window. Her head stood straight and looked strong, but there was a large number of bandages wrapped around her barrow and an IV drip on a wheeled stand followed her. 

Lyra was already bowing down, and Bon Bon was just lowering herself after gasping “Your Majesty!” when Gentle Breeze stepped into the room. The Princess and the former unicorn’s eyes met, and for a long moment Gentle Breeze didn’t know what to do or say. The Princess seemed to be probing her somehow, but there was no glow on her horn and nothing like normal magic was involved. When the moment passed, Gentle Breeze started to bow like Lyra and Bon Bon were. 

“There will be no need for that, please stand.” Celestia stopped them with a light musical tone of voice. She continued “indeed, my little ponies, please take up some of the spare cushions and join me here by the window. This is a rare treat for me.”

“Treat? Your highness?” Bon Bon asked.

Celestia motioned to the sky outside her window, “Do to my weakened condition, my Sister is lowering the Sun tonight. Don’t you think her sunset is lovely?” then in a lower conspiratorial voice she added, “Though I do think she using a bit too much blue and not enough pink, if you ask me.”

For several minutes the four equines watched the sky darken. When the colors faded and the moon started to raise Celestia turned her attention back to the three mares.

“Dear Sweetie Drops, or do you prefer Bon Bon? I glad to meet you, I’ve been a fan of your candies, especially your wonderful cake toppings for years. Princess Twilight has written me several times over the years, complimenting your confectionery. And of course last time I had Pinky Pie plan a formal party at the castle, she insisted on using your special chocolates.”

Bon Bon was speechless, the Princess knew her? Twilight had written about her candies!? Sputtering she bowed again and squeaked out “You’re so kind your highness!”

Turning her attention to Lyra, Celestia’s eyes opened wide for a moment. “Oh dear! I remember you. You were a friend of Princess Cadence!” Then Celestia frowned, “Or was that all part of the Changeling's queens’ tricks? I understood there was a spell involved…”

Lyra gave one of her rare frowns. “It was a bit of both, Chrysalis used me, but I did, uh, do know Cadence. We weren’t very close friends and I doubt she would have picked me for a bridesmaid. She’s older than me but we met at your School for gifted unicorns.”

“But you’re much too young to have been in the same classes as Cadence, how did you meet?!” Celestia asked. 

Lyra explained, “It was there when Twilight Sparkle was your student in the school. I know you taught her advance lessons, but she had to take the same core classes we all had to take for the more common stuff. I doubt she would recognize me in a crowd, because, well you know, how she really didn’t pay attention to anypony else back then. But Princess Cadence would stop by a few times a week to walk her to your castle or her home.”

Lyra continued, ‘Twilight being Twilight, she would stay late much of the time, trying to get the teachers to give her more homework, or to prove some new theory. So Cadence would wait for her, and I stayed with her, we started talking regularly. She really loves music, and we hit it off, even went to a few concerts together. I guess that Chrysalis some how found about that and tracked me down to use against Cadence.” 

Lyra frowned more deeply, ‘It was horrible, she took me to use against Cadence and for a while she would have a changeling look like me, but when Shining Armor’s shield went up, only Chrysalis was strong enough to keep in disguise under the shield. So Chrysalis blasted me with her green magic,and I just had to do what she told me to do. I didn’t really come back to myself until days later.” Lyra turned her head to hide tears.

Gentle Breeze looked at Lyra in amazement, she had taken the green unicorn as being a bit on the silly side, light and carefree. She now didn’t know what to think.

Celestia though responded immediately, wrapping a wing around Lyra and pulling her in for a hug. “My Little Pony, I so sorry, you are probably one of the few ponies, not cursed by the Cult that really can understand what the victims are experiencing.  Chrysalis mind control spells are not the same as the Cult’s but both are of the worst type of evil magic. The type that leaves innocent ponies with fear and guilt that they really should not be burdened with.”
After a few moments, Celestia guided Lyra to stand on her own hooves again, and turned her attention to Gentle Breeze.

Celestia said to her, “Dear Gentle Breeze, you certainly are a Pony I am most curious about.”

Gentle Breeze looked up confused, and waited for the Princess to explain.

“I have fought previous outbreaks of the Cult since before the time of Discards rule. Yet in all that time I have never met one of the Cults  Priestesses, at least not alive. I am very curious about the inside knowledge you must have.”

Gentle Breeze blinked at the comment, then replied. “I try to help anyway I can but I’m sorry your majesty, my job as a Virgulinos was far from being a Priestess. There were leaders who some called Priests, but my fellow Virgulinos and I were but tools for them. We performed rituals for them. Don’t get me wrong,  I’m not trying to make excuses, we did this rituals willingly, under the Cults spells it truly felt like we were doing good, being helpful. But our rule was to execute other ponies directions. Not only didn’t we have any real authority, we had less freedom than most.”

“What do you mean, less freedom?”

“Virgulinos were valued in the Cult because we were expensive to train so we were not allowed to leave the camp, I hardly ever got to do outside and there were sacrifices a pony has to make to be changed into what I am.” 

“Sacrifices? What sort of Sacrifices? Like  your horn?” Lyra asked this, wincing at the flat spot on Gentle Breezes head.

Gentle Breeze put a hoof up to where her horn once was. “The took my horn by force, but they made me think it was a willing gift. The tatoos on my body are to redirect the ley lines so I can still channel some forms of magic, but Virgulinos real purpose is the act as magic batteries for the elders, they cast the real spells, and we store and refine the magic of the spells, allowing them to cast spells far above their own strength. The needles that lay these tattoos penetrated deep inside me. The lines run inside as well as out.  But that not really what I was talking about.” Gentle Breeze turned to looked at her flank, but not at her cutie mark.

“Go on.” Celestia urged Gentle Breeze to continue.

“Much of the magic the Cult uses is a type that until I joined them I never heard of it, they call it Tantric Magic which gathers power from intimacy, mostly of the physical kind. As a Virgulino I was expected to take every opportunity to gather power, to maintain a sort of physical high. I also was expected to always be ready and willing to lend my body to any any cult member’s pleasure, male or female. A Virgulino was too valuable to the Cult to be allowed to take time off and have a foal.” Gentle Breeze looked up, her eyes were wet with suppressed tears. “I’m not a full mare anymore. I can never come to season again.”

Celestia bowed her head, “Tantric Magic is not completely unknown. While any school of magic is in itself not good or evil, other than in how it is used. Tantric by it nature discourages ponies from long term commitments to each other. As Harmony between ponies can be harmed by this, I have discouraged it’s study. Even as well read a magic expert as Princess Twilight, has only the most dry and technically abstract understanding of that magic school. Perhaps I was wrong to restrict the study of Tantric Magic so much. If the Cults has gained so much power from its application we are now at a disadvantage due to ignorance.”

Celestia continued, “As for your loss, I am very sorry to hear they hurt you in such a personal way. Your first opportunity for motherhood was taken from you so cruelly. Still when this evil war is over, with luck you and Red Wood could start over, perhaps adopt, if you wish to raise another foal. But before that can happen, there is much evil that need to be corrected.”

Gentle Breeze whispered, “There some evils that can’t be fixed Princess. The Cults magic made me believe that the pegasus killed my new born colt. I know now it was their pet monster that did it. I hate myself for ever working for those monsters.”

Spike who had been listening all along asked “What? No one has told you yet?”

Gentle Breeze turned to the little dragon and asked, “Told me what?”

“Your Colt didn’t die in that attack that took you away. He’s here in Ponyville, Fluttershy was watching him when Red Wood was summoned away with Twilight.”

Gentle Breeze fell on her haunches in shock. “Don’t joke with me about that! I saw the blood, I tried to hide him, my baby, but there blood everywhere. They told me he died.”

“Who told you? The Cult? The monster that attacked you, sweated blood to drive ponies mad in fear. Your son took no injury.” Celestia asked. 

Gentle Breeze started to reply when Spike interjected again. “Oh right, Fluttershy went to Canterlot, she asked the Cakes to watch Banyan for her when sh….”

Gentle Breeze turned and let out a loud cry of “WHAT! Banyan is my SON?!” Then she collapsed on the floor gasping, tears falling from her eyes in rivets. 

“Huh?” Spike wondered, “I’d thought she would be happy?”

Celestia shook her head at Spike, but sported a small smile. “This sort of emotional shock was not what I was expecting to be talking about with you my little pony. “

Bon Bon and Lyra were now holding onto Gentle Breeze, supporting her head and comforting her. Celestia started to cover them with a wing, but then withdraw it, considering and thinking about the situation. 



Without another word the three mares bundled together and slowly walked out of the Princesses room. Lyra and Bon Bon, gave hasty and somewhat uncouth bows in Celestia’s direction, but Gentle Breeze was in too much shock to even acknowledge the Princess.