I stared at Sombra as he walked into the kitchen. "Clothes this time?"
I shrugged and bit into some strange fruit. "They're dry."
Sombra shook his head. "Is that really the only reason you weren't wearing them?"
I nodded. "Damp clothes are--"
"Ask me...." Sombra walked over to the counter I was standing at and hopped onto a stool. "I could have dried them in two seconds."
I bit my lip. "You could have mentioned that." I set the fruit down and stretched my back. "Is there anything else I should know?"
Sobra grabbed a fruit from the counter and set it before himself. "I was king...I am a powerful unicorn...I have a curse that--"
I clapped my hands together. "Okay, start at the curse?"
Sombra snorted angrily. "It's tied with the pony I was--"
"Then dont." I turned to the pantry. "Honestly, if you don't feel comfortable--"
Sombra slammed his hoof into the counter. "I don't understand what the flying blue piss dragging pegasus you're saying! Shut up!"
I turned to him, glaring as best I could. "Okay! Okay! German? No? Stop me when you understand me! Polish? No? Good...terrible at it. Russian? No--"
Sombra leaned back. "Why do you speak Cervid?"
I stared at him, dead on. "Are you kidding me? Russian?" I growled angrily and scratched my scalp. "It's not whatever you just called it! It's Russian! Dirty filthy evil language!"
Sombra shook his head and bit into the fruit. "It's the language, or a match to say the least, for the Deer Tsardom's trade convoys. I don't mean to assume, but I'd say most deer speak Cervid."
I groaned softly, keeping my mouth shut and distorting the sound as I rubbed my head. "God damn it. And you traded with them? Great...because I love speaking the language they forced on us."
Sombra cleared his throat. "Then don't. Just--"
"I can speak Russian better than English." I rubbed my eyes and turned back to the counter with a can of beans, simply labeled Beans. "Fuck. You're a piece of shit, you know that!?"
Sombra held a hoof up. "I'm not making you speak anything!"
I rubbed my eyes, my body shook as I was flung back to home. "It's just not a good language. I don't like it."
"Did a deer kill your family? I don't really--"
I hit the counter with the can. "Can we get back to point?"
Sombra set his fruit aside. "It would seem like yours might be more pressing."
I leaned against the counter and propped my head up with my hand. "If I tell you-- I can't speak that right now. If I tell you, you going to tell me what happened to you?"
Sombra sighed heavily. "Story time...lovely."
I stood up and held my hands out, showing off the room. "We're here until the ice thaws at least a little, do you have a better idea?"
Sombra rubbed the counter with his hoof. "Mine is shorter." He looked towards the door. "A friend of mine died, I tried everything I could to bring him back--or rather to keep him with us. His death wasn't exactly clean." Sombra shifted his hooves down the counter. "I tied his spirit to a crystal, inlaid that crystal in armor to give him form. The crystal grew weak, I added more, and more, worked my nation hard, turned workers into slaves just to get more, went mad...." Sombra closed his eyes. "I know he died, but everything after that is a bit of a blur. I suppose I probably tangled with some forces I shouldn't have trying to keep him alive." Sombra rubbed his head. "I'm skipping details, I know. But I feel there's much you wouldn't understand."
I looked at the obnoxious black unicorn. "Magic is fable in my home, so I do think simplicity is best."
Sombra shook his head. "Some of the things I leave out aren't to make things simple. Some are just-- I can't remember." He put his hoof to his horn. "I remember making a deal with something in one of the bore mines, all the power I would ever need at the cost of something. I don't even remember what."
"Sanity." I leaned my back against the counter. "I think mine is much, much easier." I set the can down and took a deep breath. "I was a barber, people found out I was gay. They burned my shop. I killed the men who did it, and one who aided." I rubbed my mouth. "It's why I'm here."
Sombra tapped the counter with his hoof. "So, your plan was to turn me in for your bounty?"
"Original plan, yes." I turned to face him. He looked confused. "What?"
"Where did you kill?"
"Konigsberg, Russia."
Sombra's stare turned into a bemused glare. "And you're afraid they'll catch you?"
"Extradition." I rubbed my neck. "I tried to go to Poland, Germany, America, and those nations weren't on the best of terms. But each time I looked it up, the state was trying to find me." I tapped my fingers on the counter. "I killed six people, I didn't try to hide it. Political dissenters and refugees may have safety, but a murderer has no protection."
Sombra grunted and jerked his head to the side. "Murderer is a strong term.... Seems like belated self defense."
I shrugged. "Call it what you will, they were looking for me."
Sombra stared at me. "And you're afraid the Princesses would turn you over?"
"Someone, maybe not them directly." I scratched my head and held my can tight.
Sombra sighed lightly. "I-- I am a King."
"With no kingdom, and no chance at returning, and the hatred of a nation."
Sombra's face fell flat into a neutered expression. "I could rebuild. You know, not all of the ice storms were my fault, I took away the capital, yes, but--"
"You think you're going to appeal to the princesses?" I laughed heavily. "You'd have a worse chance than me!"
Sombra looked worried, his eyes narrowed towards my can. "I present myself to Celestia Herself, unarmed and clear minded-" his eyes began to smoke pure black again. "-I could get a chance-" the smoke thickened, green glow coming from the corners, "-I could--"
I slammed the counter with the can, snapping him awake. "Wake up!"
Sombra popped his eyes open. "What? What happened?!" He looked around the room, the smoke clearing from his eyes. "What?"
I scratched my neck, the stubble rather prickly. "You do this thing where your eyes catch fire."
Sombra's eyes flashed open, his mouth completely flat. "Hmm...."
"The curse?"
Sombra's eye twitched as he turned away. "Something I should probably deal with.... Been--I don't even know how long." He rubbed his horn.
I tapped my fingers on the counter. "Odd question, but can that curse stuff cause nightmares?"
Sombra slowly turned back to face me. "Have you--"
"This morning, yes. Three before I could actually wake up." I rubbed the side of my neck. "Should I be worried?"
Sombra sighed slightly. "Yes and no. It means my magic is returning, it also means that I'll be a bit more volatile."
I grumbled softly and tossed the can from hand to hand. "Any idea how we fix this?"
Sombra rolled his eyes. "Who's we?"
"You, and I." I set the can down and slid it towards him. "I help you reform, or repent, or whatever your plan is, you vouch for my safety."
Sombra smiled at me. "Ulterior motives even when offering to help save my mind." He laughed heartily, sounding like some Disney villain. "Oh my...I do like you, I don't think I've said that, but I can appreciate subtle evil."
I shrugged. "Not really evil, more realist."
Sombra laughed again. "Perhaps, but the deviousness--"
"Did I say I'd leave after?" I stood up and stretched my arms. "You're the first pony I've actually talked to for more than a day. You're one of the few people I've talked to for more than a day. And if I help you, I do expect something back."
Sombra stared up at me. We sat there, locked for a few moments. "Friends?"
I shrugged. "Until one of us stabs the other in the back. Which, I will try to avoid. I can only try so hard though."
Sombra continued to stare. He slowly let his eyes cross and stuck his tongue out. "Celestia damn.... I'm sure you'd have a problem not stabbing my back."
The room went completely still. I stood there, arms in the air. I let out a sharp giggle. "Was that a joke?"
Sombra fixed his face and turned away. "No!" He stormed out. "Isolation is making you mad!"
I started to snicker. "Oh shit, he fucking made a sex joke." I covered my mouth. "Oh god...perfect." I walked out and hung my head out into the hall. "Jokes are good! Keep you normal, not glowing eye'd maniac!"