A True Hater Of Equestria

by cheayhotbeef


Sun stars

"Hey Luna, if you control the moon, and Celestia controls the sun. Who controls the stars?" Jet asked Luna, who only facepalmed.
"I control the night, which includes the moon, stars, and comets. Why do you ask?"
"Because the sun is a star."
"No it not. You have no idea what your talking about." Luna hugged him for his stupidity.
"Fine. What's a star then?"
"It's a fixed point in the sky that glows and emits it's own power and light."
"What's a sun."
"A ball of fire." She said looking confident.
"Wrong."
"What?"
"The sun is a star at the center of a solar system. A solar system is created when an object revolves around a star. This planet is orbiting that star and that makes a sun." Jet smiled
"So your saying I have the right to move the sun?"
"Yah. But only if you have the power to move it."
"Are you saying I'm not strong?" Luna got defensive.
"No. I'm just asking how big the sun is and how big the moon is." Jet resumed hugging her. "In mass"
"The moon is 7.35 x 10^22 kilograms. The sun is 1.989E30 kg." Luna spoke proudly.
"Nice. Do you want to watch the sun set twice today?"
"What do you mean?"
"I'll show you."
Jet and Luna traveled to her castle. At ground level, they both watched the sun set.
"It's all the way down, now what." Luna asked. Jet jumped on her back and pointed up.
"Let's fly up to the top tower." She went inside the castle and took the airlift which was air pushing up a long shaft. Luna stood inside, closed the door, then pressed a button. A gust of air shot out from the grid-looking floor. There must've been a large fan. She then spread her wings which immediately made them both reach the topmost floor.
They then jumped off a balcony and flu up the shadowy part of the structure. When they reached the highest point on the castle they didn't expect Celestia to be there starring directly into the sun. Jet shielded his eyes with his hands as they landed.
"Interesting, I didn't know you could experience the sunset twice. Thanks Jet." Luna placed Jet on the ground, who immediately stood up.
"No problematic enigmas." Jet replied.
"What's going on?" Celestia looked confused.
"Jet just showed me how to see the sun set twice in one minute. That's amazing!" Luna hugged Jet who only lifted her up like a baby.
"It also works with the moon rise and set. Speaking of the moon, are there days where the moon is red?" Jet asked.
"No." They both said together but then looked at each other.
"Jet, may I ask you a question?" Celestia asked.
"You just did." Jet pointed out. Does this count as a father joke?
"Ha Ha very funny." She fake laughed. "My friends, Twilight Sparkle, was questioning my knowledge. And was wondering if you could possibly be more smarter than me." Luna turned around and noticed this request.
"Silly grandma, of course I'm more smarter than you." Jet emphasized the word 'more.'
"Grandma?" She asked
"It means you're old."
"Uh-hu. So are you up to the challenge?" Celestia, well, challenged.
"Eh." Jet said yes.
"Ooooo this is going to be interesting. I'll prepare the challenge." Luna flu away leaving Jet with Celestia. 5 second pause.
"Do you like bananas? I like big, juicy, tasty, bananas" Jet saw her hold back a laugh.
"Is that the best you could do?"
"Fine. Uuuhhh, do you wanna know some facts about the sun?" Celestia nodded.
"Ok, the sun produces its own energy using its heat. Because of this extreme heat, nuclear fusion can happen. Nuclear fusion happens at the core of the sun. It's natural hydrogen gas gets squeezed so much that it's atoms convert to helium. The energy Is produced because some of the hydrogen's mass is converted to sunlight."
"Wow. I didn't know that." Celestia expressed interest. "Do you have any more info?"
"Yah, but it's just numbers and shit." Jet said without changing his smile. Celestia's smile fades at his words.
"Excuse me?"
"I only know the truth."
"No about your choice of words."
"Language? Did you know any words that dont have a rhyme?" Jet hoped that Celestia would forget his way of speech.
"Orange doesn't have a rhyme." Celestia said with intention of surprise.
"It does."
"No it doesn't.
"Door hinge rhymes with orange." Jet stumped her. After three seconds of thinking, Celestia resumed.
"How about purple?
"Nurple." Jet spoke with unease hope she wouldn't ask what it was.
"What's a nurple?"
Doe. "It's the act of twisting one's nipple. It's sorta slang." Jet said as Luna returned.
"I've gathered some cards and there answers." Luna announced.
"Ok, but I want something if I win." Jet said.
"What?" Celestia responded.
"I said, I want something if I win."
"I know but I was wondering what that would be." Celestia facepalmed with her hoof.
"I want a cauldron."
"And for me if I win, I want you to sing a love song."
Jet only nodded with a fake sad face.
Three hours later.
"I can't believe I lost." Celestia said. "And the category was sun!" She started to get angry.
"Loser." Jet taunted.
"Leave her alone." Luna requested. "She sad and wants to be alone." She got defensive.
"I'm sorry, is there anyway I can make out with you?" They both look at him with 'I can't believe you' faces.
"I'm sorry again, I get all period when I win against a bad more worst player than me." Jet shot at Celestia.
"Ignore it. I'll take him away." Luna whispered to Celestia. She then stopped comforting her and moved close to Jet, who was lying on the ground looking at the sky..
"The night wonderful, makes you wonder 'how could anyone reach that? It's impossible.' But humans did so. Around 30 years ago, we sent a human to the moon, and planted a flag there. We did the impossible." With this statement, Jet closed his eyes, not sleeping.
Luna just stood there in shock. Had humans really been to the moon, without magic? It took so much energy to banish her to the moon plus a lot of recoil on Celestia. How could they do it? These were all questions that Luna wanted to ask him but didn't want to disturb him.
"Sister, good night." Celestia left the tower and into her room.
Luna lifted Jet's arms and layed under him snugly falling fast asleep.