Prince Blueblood gazed down at the kingdom of Canterlot, the sun finally new and bright as it woke up the ponies of Equestria. He rested his front legs on the balcony that looked over the moat surrounding the castle. From this height it was quite easy to stare out into the kingdom, and it was likely that nopony could see him. He stared into the mass of buildings and began to wonder where Fancy’s home was located.
Blueblood closed his eyes a moment, retracing the path his carriage took in reverse, though even from this height it was impossible to spot Fancy Pants’ home.
The Prince heard the door to his room open behind him. He turned his head to spot Sunny.
The helper adjusted his glasses as his eyes moved from the empty bed to the balcony. “You’re up early, Prince Blueblood.” The unicorn stated. He walked slowly to the direction of the balcony, across the purple marble floors. “It’s a bit chilly this morning though. Are you warm enough up there?”
It was only when Sunny said those words did Blueblood realize his skin was beginning to feel a bit cold, his body bare aside from his fur. He shook his head anyway, deciding he didn’t want to leave the balcony.
“I don’t normally see you get up this early,” Sunny laughed as he hopped onto the balcony. “Normally you’re a heavy sleeper. I’ve had to rip the covers off of you more than once.”
“I didn’t sleep too much.” Blueblood mumbled as he ran his hoof through his mane. “I tried, but I just kept constantly waking up.”
“You got home late as well.” Sunny pushed past the white curtain to step onto the balcony where Blueblood was seated. “Would you like to go get some coffee and breakfast with me? The chef has honey and oats this morning for everypony. I know you enjoy honey quite a lot.”
“If it’s alright with you,” Blueblood looked away from Sunny as he fumbled with his hooves. “I’m not feeling all that hungry…I think I’m actually feeling a tad ill.”
“Really?” Sunny asked as he pressed his hoof to Blueblood’s forehead for a brief moment. “You don’t feel too warm. Is everything alright?”
Blueblood opened his mouth briefly, though he closed it again a moment later. He looked away from Sunny and onto the marble floor of the balcony. His belly twisted up inside of him as he shut his eyes.
“Sunny… Do you know what it’s like to be jealous? Romantically I mean.” Blueblood asked the question, but didn’t look at his butler when he did so.
“That’s an odd question.” Sunny raised his brow at the prince, who was currently looking away at the moat beneath the balcony. “I’ve felt jealous before, yes. There were plenty of times where I liked a mare and she told me she liked somepony else. It tears you up inside for a while.”
Blueblood felt his cheek, the spot where Fancy Pants had pressed his lips against nearly a week ago. His lips were rough yet warm on his skin, so comforting and brief that Blueblood thirsted for more.
“Did you ever confuse affection with just…perhaps being friendly?” Blueblood felt his hoof, the same one Fancy kissed on several occasions. He thought about how Sunny told him it was common, something everypony did.
“Once or twice, yes.” Sunny chuckled, though his brown cheeks were starting to flush. “I had a mare who I crushed on for months. I tried flirting for what felt like eons… turns out she liked mares and didn’t even have the faintest clue what I was suggesting when I constantly complimented her.”
Blueblood buried his muzzle in his upper legs as he gazed off of the balcony.
“She knows him so much better than me,” he grumbled, his cheeks flushed the more he thought about how much Fleur had been able to care for Fancy Pants like it was second nature. “How can she just be all over him like that so naturally?”
The thought about Fleur being able to be there for Fancy Pants and be confident in what he was doing made him redden deeper. She grabbed his hoof a dozen times without even hesitating.
“What was that?” Sunny questioned, Blueblood’s muffled words hard to make out. “I think you’re warming up quite a bit now, so perhaps you do have that fever.”
“No, I’m quite fine.” Blueblood stated firmly. He sat his body up as he rubbed his face with his hooves. He tried his best to keep his mind off of the previous night, but his mind kept itself at bay, always drifting back to the shore of his worries.
“Prince Blueblood, why do you ask all of this?”
Blueblood heard the door to his room open once more, however he kept his face buried in his hooves. He didn’t answer Sunny and instead simply shook his head.
“Who could that…” Sunny mumbled, though Blueblood heard his butler stand up quickly. Blueblood watched as he rapidly smoothed out his wrinkled green sweater. “P-Prince Shining, how wonderful to see you so early!”
“Shining?” Blueblood felt his heart sink deep into his chest as he turned around. He saw Shining Armor standing in the doorway, his body bare of any armor or special attire. Blueblood stood up suddenly, his legs a bit wobbily from sitting for so long.
“Blue!” Shining took a step forward, though he quickly brought it back to stand in place. “You’re here! That’s…that’s really good.”
“Prince Shining, it is quite a bit rude to barge into other’s rooms.” Sunny spoke as he walked away from Blueblood. He frowned at the prince as he trotted up to him.
“I’m really sorry, Sunny.” Shining Armor bowed his head to the servant. “I’d like to talk to Prince Blueblood alone…if that’s alright with you, that is.” Shining’s smiled looked strange, as if it pained him to keep it on his face. He took a quick glance at Blueblood, though soon turned away. “We have some things I’d like to discuss.”
Sunny blinked before he glanced back at Prince Blueblood. Blueblood hesitated, thinking quickly for any possible excuse to get out of this, any way to run and…
He looked into Shining Armor’s eyes. His mind wiped for but a moment. A feeling of longing wrapped itself around his heart. He had worked so hard to avoid Shining Armor for weeks, but now that he was here…
He missed his friend.
Blueblood nodded to Sunny, his chest feeling icy.
“It just happens I was headed out anyway.” The butler told Shining Armor. Sunny bowed his own head before he threw Prince Blueblood one final glance, his steps slow as he moved out the door. “I’ll check later to see if you want to join me for lunch, Prince Blueblood.”
The door sounded final as it swung shut to the prince, as if it were sealing him in with his friend. He found himself frozen for a brief second, Shining Armor taking a hesitant step forward on the purple marble floor. The step felt like thunder that made Blueblood want to run and hide someplace safe, someplace far away.
“Hey there, Blue, how’s it going?” Shining Armor chuckled as he approached. It was as if he was trying to sound casual, but his words came out gingerly. They tiptoed around being truly comfortable with the situation. “I, uh…I thought I would give you a visit.”
Prince Blueblood took his first step from the balcony. He took a moment before he put his hoof down inside his room, and, unwilling to show any sign of weakness, he kept his posture tall while he trotted up to the other.
“It’s…good to see you.” Blueblood answered, his words a bit less solid that his looks. He didn’t want to look into Shining Armor’s eyes. They were soft and full of worry that the prince wasn’t ready to deal with.
“Blue, I…” Shining took a step forward, though Blueblood took one back. It was almost without thought that he did so, for Shining looked down at his friend’s hooves, though thankfully he didn’t say anything. “I wanted to run into you someplace more casual, y’know, like in town or the maze or when eating…I really didn’t want to come to you directly like this, but I felt like I needed to.”
“I…I didn’t…try to avoid you.” Blueblood bit into his cheek. He felt like Shining was writing the word “Liar” all over his body with just his eyes. His breathing became tight. “I’ve been busy with Fancy Pants.”
“Fancy Pants…” Shining Armor mumbled. The blue haired unicorn took a moment to press his hoof to his forehead before he began to shake his head. He must have seen Blueblood take another step back, because his face instantly softened into worry. “No no no, I’m not mad, I just…”
Shining Armor groaned as he shook his head. Blueblood bit harder on his cheek, his friend silent for a few moments.
“It’s…it’s okay if you want to spend more time with Fancy Pants than me.” Shining lifted his hoof, hesitant to reach out and touch the other. He put it down when Blueblood looked away. “It’s just…you’re my best friend. You’ve always been my best friend, and you’ve hardly talked to me in the past month since we came back!”
Shining Armor’s voice was raising, though he didn’t seem angry, more upset than anything. The muscles in his forelegs seemed tense as he pushed them into the marble floor.
“I just…you and Cadence…”
“Cadence,” Shining shook his head again, emotions turning to frustration at the simple name. “She let it slip last time she even got a look at you, you just yelled at her and ran away?”
“Cadence just…” Blueblood’s words became hard to form in his own mouth. He closed his eyes, the sensation of Shining’s stare rough on his skin. “I wasn’t thinking back then. I was upset and something slipped. She just came up to me and started talking like… like she knew everything about me!”
“Because she does, Blue!” Shining Armor took another step forward, this time less hesitation in his actions. “We both do, we know everything about each other. I know that you and Cadence and me used to sneak away into town and eat all that crap your dad wouldn’t let you have. I know that you broke your leg once when we were screwing around in the maze and you didn’t want to blame it on me so you tried to hide it. I know that you hated every single one of those lectures your father made you listen too!”
Fond nostalgia was blanketed by Shining Armor’s worry and frustration at his friend. Any joy he might have taken in talking about the memories was covered in thick growing anger. Blueblood had backed up enough that when he looked to his side he saw his large mirror. It may have just been his imagination, but a brief moment when his chest hurt, he thought he saw a spark of Blue on his horn.
“Fancy Pants has been…” Blueblood couldn’t think straight, and he suddenly wished more than anything that he didn’t feel so alone.
“Why is it always Fancy Pants?” Shining held out both his hooves helplessly when he snapped, his eyes stabbing Blueblood through the heart.
Blueblood clasped both his hooves on the side of his head, holding his breath as he shut his eyes firmly. He could hear Shining Armor take a breath of his own, however he exhaled it quickly. When his hoof touched Blueblood’s, it felt like ice.
Blueblood remembered in an instant the first time Shining Armor held his hoof. It was when he was crying about his father yelling at him saying he shouldn’t spend time with his guards so much. Shining had butted into his room and saw him, refusing to leave until he found out the reason. Shining had held his hoof the same way back then, so comforting and compassionate, it had been the first time Blueblood felt his heart actually skip for the royal guard.
Right now, his heart was still.
“I’m sorry I’m yelling,” Shining Armor bit firmly into his lip as he looked at the prince. “I know you… I know you hated it when he yelled. I shouldn’t, I really shouldn’t.”
“Shining…” Blueblood lowered his hooves slowly. He realized his own legs were shaking, the fear gripping at his heart. He wanted to speak more, wanted to say anything to make the situation easier.
“You’re my best friend, Blue.” Shining Armor held Blueblood’s hoof firmly in his own. “I don’t want to lose you. Is it because you’re mad at me? Because we left and you…you had to stay here?
“No… No it isn’t because of that…” Blueblood’s voice was timid, quiet even. His body was still trembling. “I can’t…I can’t tell you…”
“Why not?” Shining’s voice was rising again, but he quickly calmed it down as he shook his own head violently.
“It’s too late now!” Blueblood snapped, his voice breaking. “You and Cadence got married, and it hurt… but now I…”
Fancy Pants popped into his head. Fleur at his side every moment laid in his mind like a seed, growing and tangling around his thoughts. It reminded him of Cadence. It was happening again. Everything was just falling into place like clockwork.
There was a brief silence as Shining Armor relaxed his posture, looking tired.
“You never wrote. We tried to write so much but you just never…” Shining Armor shook his head. “I know things went from normal to us being gone fast. Cadence and I got married so fast and then moved away even faster. I just want to know what we…no, what I did to make you so distant. I know it was my fault. You can tell me. I can take it.”
Blueblood remained silent as he stared at Shining’s face, the unicorn sighed, his face vicious with his curiosity at the same time.
“Ever since me and Cadence got together you’ve been so distant. Did we ignore you too much? Did we really make you feel that awful that we…? Please just tell me, Blue.”
Silence.
“Please, Blue…” Shining Armor trailed off, though the second he began to lower his head, Blueblood grasped it in his hooves, firmly lifting it to stare into Shining’s eyes.
“Blue, wha…”
It was rather sudden and unexpected, but when Blueblood pressed his lips to Shining Armor, the world seemed to stop for a brief moment. The kiss was rough, yet soft. Shining Armor didn’t seem to fight him, he simply seemed frozen by his own shock. Blueblood kept his eyes firmly shut, blocking out the rest of the world for one moment.
It tasted bitter.
It was Shining Armor who pulled away first. He did so by grasping Blueblood’s hooves over his own, pulling the Prince’s face away. There was a silence between the two as they stared into each other’s eyes, that brief moment where thought couldn’t function for either stallion.
This was something Prince Blueblood had dreamed of for as long as he could remember, to look into Shining Armor’s eyes after a passionate kiss, to feel the lips against his. Why did it taste so awful?
“Oh.” Was all Shining Armor could say, his voice not angry or upset, just in shock.
“Fancy…” Blueblood mumbled. The prince’s eyes widened suddenly as he pushed himself off of his friend. His chest beat so hard it nearly hurt, beating and beating that awful drum. His vision became blurry as emotions began to overtake him.
“Shining, g-get out, now.” Blueblood stuttered as he turned away from Shining Armor. He looked into the mirror once more, his eyes watered so badly that he couldn’t see his own reflection. His head began to hurt, his horn began to ache as he tried not to breathe.
“Blue, wait, what was… why did…” Shining Armor took a step forward. “I mean…”
Blueblood clamped both hooves on either side of his head, his eyes shutting the world out as he grinded his teeth together. His face was burning, his lungs gasping for air that he wouldn’t let in. His head began to ache, and when he opened his eyes he could see a hairline crack in the mirror beside him. His mane was ragged, his eyes wide, and he looked like a wild beast.
He began shaking his head. Another step forward from Shining Armor. He turned around, backing away two steps. Shining flinched back, Blueblood’s stance defensive as he hunched down. His eyes were blurring as his breathing became quick.
“Stay away from me!”
“Blue, I… You never told me that…” Shining took a step forward again, his hoof close to Blueblood’s shoulder, getting closer and closer with each second. “Look, we can talk, okay? Just calm down and we can…”
"GET OUT!” Blueblood screamed, shattering the mirror with what felt like the sound of his own voice, though his horn glowed a fiery blue. He watched glass rained down in a dangerous explosion. He could hear Shining yell in shock, though it wasn’t from the glass, it was from the fact that he was being pushed back with such force that his body flew back several feet. It was as if he had been hit by an unstoppable force that had smashed up against his body, throwing him to the ground with a thunderous slam.
Shining sat there, coughing and gasping for air. His eyes quickly found Blueblood after a brief moment of disorientation, attempting to get to his hooves despite his shaking legs. Though the wind had been knocked out of him, he still attempted to take a step towards the prince.
In seconds, two royal guards came rushing in, alert and ready.
“Prince Blueblood, we heard screaming, are you alright!” The guard yelled, panic in his tone as he scanned the room. “T-There’s glass everywhere!
“Get out!” Blueblood yelled, the other guard helping Shining to his hooves. He could feel the fire burn his horn as he screamed. “Everypony out, right now! I don’t want anypony in my sight no matter what!”
“Yes your highness.” The royal guard who helped Shining up nodded his head. “Please let us at least clean up the glass at least, it’s dangerous, are you hurt?”
“No, wait, Blue!” Shining yelled at Blueblood. The prince had already turned his head away, his body numb to the world around him. “You can’t just shut me out again!”
“I’m not hurt… go ahead and clean it up. I don’t give a damn.”
Blueblood held his breath as he nodded his head, Shining Armor being led out of the room. Blueblood couldn't tell if he was fighting the guards or not, for his mind was screaming too loudly to even think. The prince held his head low as he walked quickly to the bathroom, slamming the door behind him with his hoof.
He looked down to his leg and realized blood dribbled out of him, staining his snow white fur with crimson tears that matched the ones coming from his eye. It was only now that he began to feel the pain of the cut, wincing as he put his hoof over it. The cut went up his upper leg to near his shoulder where the shard must have hit him in the explosion. Thankfully it didn’t seem glass was embedded into him, but simply hit him on it’s way out.
When he touched it, it began to leak onto his free hoof. It was blood, it was real, and it was his. As he stared at his hoof his breath began to catch, trembling and breaking from the inside as he wrapped his legs around himself in an attempt to hold his crumbling body together.
And without warning, tears sped down his cheek.
“Calm down… calm down calm down calm down calm down.”
The cut thankfully didn’t seem very deep, nor very long. His horn still ached with the burst of magic that had erupted from it in his moment of panic. The anger and terror that ran through his body was still freshly imprinted on his heart. When he touched the horn he flinched, more tears spilling from his eyes. It was sore, tender even.
He shakily moved in the direction of the tub, crouching next to it before running water, making sure it was warm before putting his leg under. The red liquid washed from him, though it was only moments later when it returned.
As he stood up, he grabbed a towel from beside him. He stared at it a moment before pressing it up against his face. He opened his mouth, making a muffled cry that was difficult to hear. He tried to clamp his mouth shut, tried to remain silent and suffer alone, but the cries came out regardless.
Tears continued to stream from his eyes, though he sniffed as he put his hoof up against his face. He couldn’t look at himself in the mirror, knowing his face must be a mess, his nose already beginning to run as he bit firmly into his lip. In all his emotions and anxiety, he felt alone. He felt beyond alone, as if he were the last pony in the universe.
“Fancy Pants…” He whimpered, his lips sour with the taste of Shining Armor.
Right now, more than anything, he wished for the embrace of Fancy Pants. He hadn’t let himself think such things until now, locking the thoughts away in his heart, knowing it was only a bomb that would soon explode, leaving him hurt once more if he simply let it detonate inside of him. Each tick sent a shiver down his spine.
Prince Blueblood pressed his own hoof to his lips, closing his eyes. The thought of Fancy stopped his tears for but a moment, a single second of peace in the whirlwind that was his mind.
He wished more than anything that Fancy Pants had been the one to steal his first kiss.