Chapter 6: Saving lieutenant Robert.
Ponyville was completely silent while the Royal Guard was in sight. Then, when they left, everypony began talking at the same time.
Rainbow Dash managed to raise her voice above the ruckus so Twilight could hear her.
“Twilight, we can’t leave him to his own like this! I don’t care what Celestia says, he’s not evil!”
“How can you trust him more than Princess Celestia?!” Twilight replied, shocked, “For all we know, he could have been lying or using some magic to make us believe he’s friendly”.
“I don’t know, sugarcube. He seemed a nice and honest fella” affirmed Applejack.
“He used a weapon on those guards, how is that nice?!” exclaimed Twilight, waving the technoglove with her magic in front of them.
“Darling, I must agree with Rainbow Dash and Applejack in this matter” said Rarity, “those colts acted like barbarians towards him and Lyra. It is only right to defend a damsel in distress. We can’t just abandon Robert after such an act of bravery!”
“Yeah! He isn’t a meanie, and he’s our friend, isn’t he?” added Pinkie Pie, far more serious than usual.
Fluttershy muttered something inaudible. After a few seconds she gathered enough courage to say it loud enough to be heard.
“I saw him lose his temper when Angel made him fall down the stairs. He was really angry and could have really hurt poor little Angel, but he calmed down and only scolded him... I think a bad pony wouldn’t have done that. I’m sure Princess Celestia is just worried because she doesn’t know him, so we should tell her that he isn’t evil” then the shyness overcame her again, “I mean, if that’s okay with you...”
“Please, Princess Celestia knows you all. Help Robert, you are his only hope” Lyra begged.
Twilight remained silent for a whole minute, looking troubled, before she came to a conclusion.
“I still believe that Princess Celestia knows best,” she raised her hoof when she noticed that her friends were about to argue back. “However, I think we should go to Canterlot. We welcomed him and became his friends, and good friends should support each other even when things are looking bad. We have an hour to make ourselves ready, then we leave so we can arrive there before tomorrow morning”.
They all left for their respective homes, but then Twilight remembered something.
“Lyra, will you come with us?” she said as she glanced back to the unicorn.
“I would love to, but...” she replied with sadness, “I don’t think it would be a good idea. I mean, you are the Elements of Harmony and the saviours of Equestria, while I’m just an unicorn. I think I will stay here until you come back... The Mayor will want to know about Robert, won’t she?... Somepony has to tell her”.
“Are you sure? You were the closest one to him, you could...”
“It’s okay, really. He promised me he would be back and I’m sure you’ll help him keep his promise” she said with a sad smile.
As Lyra left, Twilight felt a knot in her stomach. All of her friends wanted to go against Princess Celestia’s orders! She couldn’t believe it was really happening. She was afraid of the punishment the Princess may inflict upon them for “betrayal”, she was afraid of what Robert may hide and, above all, she was afraid of discovering that her beloved Princess Celestia wasn’t infallible and perfect. The simple thought of Celestia being wrong over something made her shiver like a small filly lost in the darkness.
Only when Spike opened the door of the library for her did she notice him.
“Spike... What do you think about all of this?”
“I don’t know... I think we shouldn’t have written the letter to Princess Celestia in secret. He was friendly, but he could have been acting the whole time. Princess Celestia is really wise and she apparently knows about humans. Maybe he is some kind of evil creature like Discord and he was waiting for his chance to attack?” he shrugged, “the best thing we can do is go there and tell Celestia our version of the story”.
“We will need somepony to take care of the library while we are in Canterlot”.
“Eh... No offense, Twilight, but we never receive customers so just put the ‘closed’ sign” replied Spike, rolling his eyes.
“... You are right”.
While Spike ordered the books and made sure everything was fine, Twilight inspected the technoglove. She was very intrigued, as Robert must have had it since she opened the chest for him ten days before, ‘what makes this artifact worth the risk of being caught?’ she thought. She asked Spike to wear it, but his claws were too small and only had four fingers, so he couldn’t manipulate it. Then she decided to use her magic to create a telekinetic hand. She tried flexing the fingers, but nothing happened. After a few minutes of trying a female voice coming from the glove startled her.
“Reminder: the technoglove isn’t meant to be used as a normal glove. If you are doing so, please remove it. If you want to deactivate this warning, touch your thumb with your index twice. If you need help, make a fist three times”.
“Spike! How do you make a fist?!”
“You make a fist when you close your claw!”
Twilight did so and the female voice appeared again.
“Are you a new user? Make a fist once for yes and twice for no”.
Twilight chose yes.
“Do you want gesture commands or voice commands? Make a fist twice for gesture and say ‘voice’ for voice commands”
“Voice!”
“The menu will appear now, read the number of a headline aloud for further information”.
From the back of the glove a small light appeared, which generated an hologram with a menu. Twilight managed to suppress her excitement in order to properly operate the glove.
“TECHNOGLOVE V1.8 MENU
1. Safe use
2. Basic functions and commands
3. Specific functions and commands(opens submenu)
4. Tuned accessories.
5. List of multimedia
6. Settings.”
“Oh, right, it’s written with his letters, where’s Pinkie when I need her?” she thought aloud.
“I can read that” said Spike.
“What? How? Since when?”
“Pinkie Pie taught it to me yesterday, I think it’s easier than Equestrian.”
“Wait, you learned it in one day?”
“I learned to write in Equestrian a week after I said my first words, I’m just that awesome”.
“Okay, what does it say?” asked Twilight.
Spike began translating everything to Twilight so she could properly operate the technoglove.
‘If the safe use goes first I guess it’s important’.
“Safe use”.
A recorded voice began listing all the potential dangers that could happen if the glove was used wrong. It was a very extensive list, but it also explained briefly what each potentially dangerous tool was meant to do, so Twilight learned all of the things the glove could do. After ten minutes the record ended and the menu appeared again.
‘I don’t want to use it... yet, and I know most of the functions and what these accessories are so...’
“List of multimedia”.
“MULTIMEDIA MENU
1. All multimedia (1 items)
2. Holovideos (0 items)
3. Records / music (1 items)
4. Images (0 items)
5. Text (0 items)
6. Others (0 items)
0. Back”.
“All multimedia”.
“Reminder: you can say the number instead of the full title. There is only one item, do you want to reproduce it?”.
“Yes”.
““I can’t take this anymore. Kato and John are dead. We’re...” Matheus’ message was played by the glove.
“Oh, sweet Celestia...” muttered Twilight when the message finished and the menu appeared again. Twilight, being one of the most cultivated mares in Equestria, had read about suicide many times. However, the idea of somepony taking his own life was so alien to Equestrians that she had always thought that suicides only happened in fictional stories. That is why listening to Matheus’ last words before he killed himself was such a traumatizing experience. Spike and her hugged, seeking comfort in the mutual contact as they literally cried on each other’s shoulder.
“Spike, this... This could be the proof that Robert wasn’t lying the whole time. We must bring this ‘technoglove’ to Princess Celestia”.
They spent most of the hour checking the basic functions of the glove one by one, to focus their minds in something unrelated to Matheus. Twilight discovered that the glove was meant to be used by humans without training with vocal commands and the help of the menu, whereas a trained user manipulated it with quick gestures. She also learned that the glove recharged itself with solar energy, and that the batteries get low really fast when you use the electromagnet a lot. She decided to look for another technoglove in the sealed chest. She was already lifting it from the now unsealed chest when she heard a knock upstairs and a voice.
“Twilight! We’re ready!” said Rainbow Dash.
“We’re coming, hold on a second!” she replied.
She put the first glove in her saddle, put the other in the chest and close it, not bothering in placing a magic seal. Both Spike and her left the library to meet their five closest friends, patiently waiting.
“Alright, let’s do this” said Twilight with more confidence than she felt, “in order to arrive in Canterlot before the guards we will need the balloon”.
“Are you crazy? Balloons don't fly faster than carriages pulled by pegasi, unless there’s too much wind to fly safely!” said Rainbow Dash.
“Yes, that is why you and Fluttershy will pull the balloon, and when you are tired me and Rarity will create wind with our magic”.
A few minutes later they were crossing the sky. She wrote a new letter for Princess Celestia, telling her about their impending arrival, which Spike sent with his flames. When Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash made their first stop, Twilight told them about Matheus’ message in the technoglove, but she didn’t play it, as she guessed that it would be a bad idea, especially with Fluttershy listening.
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While the Elements of Harmony raced time, Robert pondered in his cage. While he was in Ponyville he had just followed the current, only thinking about the present. Being trapped in a flying carriage with nothing else to do forced him to wonder about his fate and mourn about his past. He missed home, he missed his three colleagues who he would never see again and, above all, he was afraid of a world he didn’t belong to and couldn’t understand.
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Twilight and company arrived in Canterlot during twilight, which prompted Pinkie Pie to make a few puns about her unicorn friend. The pegasi and the unicorns were exhausted after working so hard. Two royal guard pegasi approached them when they were near the castle and told them to wait until they were given a landing spot. Two minutes later the same guards pulled the balloon to the designated place. Many unicorns, all of them wearing the Royal guard armor, were waiting for them.
“Miss Sparkle” greeted an older stallion with a more ornamented set of armor, “Princess Celestia has commanded us to escort you. Her Majesty awaits, shall we depart?”
Twilight nodded and they followed him, surrounded by a wall of guards.
“Isn’t all of this a bit... excessive?” asked Twilight.
“Princess Celestia has put all the guard in state of alert,“ he explained. “Apparently, something dangerous has been caught near the Everfree Forest and it is being carried here. That is why we’re taking more security measures than we usually do”.
Soon enough, after navigating through a maze of corridors, they stopped in front of a small door. The unicorn knocked with his hoof and a golden glow surrounded the door, opening it.
“Come in” said Princess Celestia with her unmistakable voice, “My loyal guards, you are dismissed” she added a few seconds later.
The royal guards saluted and left. Twilight and her friends crossed the doorframe and, as soon as the last one had crossed, the door closed behind them and they felt a strong magical force. Before they noticed they were surrounded by something white, big and warm.
“My little ponies,” said Celestia, hugging all of them with her wings, “I have been so worried. To think that you would meet such a terrible creature... Is that why you’ve come so quickly?”
“Well... Yes,” answered Twilight, “Uh... It’s hard to talk like this, could you please release us?”
Princess Celestia opened her wings and the six ponies plus dragon regained some personal space. She gazed at them with a warm smile, awaiting.
“Princess, we are here because we don’t understand what has Robert done to justify three guards with license to hurt civilians going after him”.
Celestia’s smile turned into a serious frown.
“Humans are a menace to everything Equestria stands for. As soon as my trusted guards bring him here Luna and I will personally determine what his presence in Equestria means and which course of action we must follow”.
“You talk as if you have met humans before, but he said his group was the first to ever leave their home, how is that even possible?” asked Twilight.
“Because a long time ago, there were humans living in Equestria” Celestia revealed, “they were beings of chaos and evil, so destructive that they ended annihilating themselves. That is why I fear that he may be the first drop of a devastating storm”.
Celestia’s revelation left all of them astonished.
“B-but... How is it that nopony knows about them?” asked Twilight.
“Because, after they were all dead, Luna and I made sure no creature would follow their steps to self-destruction by destroying all the evidence of their existence”.
“Are they really that bad?” asked Fluttershy, hiding her face behind her mane “Robert was kind to everypony...”
“Humans are miserable little piles of secrets” Celestia said with coldness, “Nevertheless, now that he can’t do any harm he will be judged with fairness. Fear not, for I wouldn’t be better than them if I judged him for what he is instead of who he is... You really came all the way to Canterlot just to say ‘Princess Celestia, please don’t annihilate the human!’? Really girls, where do these rumours of me being like that come from?” she said, trying to sound playful.
“The thing is, we may have found evidence-” tried to say Twilight.
“Everything related to the human will be discussed during the trial, which will take place after the sunrise, not now. You must be tired and hungry after such a hasty travel, so I have ordered my royal chef to prepare enough food for all of us”.
Princess Celestia stepped aside, letting the ponies see the room behind her. It was rather plain and simple, with only a table big enough for ten ponies, chairs and a little window. The table was full to the brim of delicious looking meals. A basket full of gems stood between the salads and the pastries. The ponies expressed their gratitude and began eating.
“I think it may be too much food” commented Fluttershy.
“Everything is divine!” exclaimed Rarity.
“Emeralds!” shouted Spike before feasting on said gems.
They ate and chatted about everything and nothing. Celestia was again kind and warm, the coldness in her voice when she spoke about humans had totally vanished, and soon the ponies overcame their initial apprehension and began talking with ease. Excluding Twilight and Spike, none of them had ever seen Celestia eating outside formal events, so they were surprised by the huge amount of food she ate. Even with Pinkie Pie on their side, known for being able to eat several times her own weight, the Princess had eaten more than the other six ponies together. Princess Celestia was about to begin with the desserts when the door opened again, revealing the other Princess, who was wearing a light blue pajamas and levitating a cup of coffee.
“Good evening sis...” she muttered before yawning, her eyes half-closed.
Princess Luna took a seat and a sip of her coffee before noticing the unexpected company. When she did, she almost choked on her own drink before she managed to swallow it.
“Wha- how? Oh, it’s you” she said, realizing who their guests were, “We weren’t expecting such a palatable company!”
“That sounds like you want to eat them,” remarked Celestia with a smirk, “enjoyable or nice would be better”.
Luna nodded as she levitated a few fruits and pastries to join her coffee.
“So, what brings the Element’s bearers here?” she asked after the ponies had greeted her.
“You may want to finish drinking or you will choke again” said Celestia.
“Is it that serious?”
“It is. They found a human in-”
Luna lost control of her magic and her cup of coffee fell to the floor, breaking apart.
“Thanks goodness I didn’t tell you near any expensive carpet” said Celestia with a frown, “Yes, they found a human in the Everfree forest and I want both of us to judge him to determine if he poses a threat to Equestria or if there are more humans somewhere.”
Luna nodded with a serious frown, and then she began eating.The mortal ponies had to wait fifteen minutes more until both Princesses finished having dinner, or breakfast in Luna’s case. The Princess of the moon, while less voracious than her older sister, had also eaten enough food to satisfy three regular ponies. Later on, Twilight would explain her friends that the two alicorns spend insane amounts of energy on a daily basis, so they need a proportional nourishment to avoid their bodies weakening. She also mentioned that, before Luna’s return, Celestia could eat up to ten times her own weight everyday.
As if on cue, a gentle knock on the door was heard by all of them as soon as the princesses finished eating.
“You may pass” said Celestia.
An earth pony guard opened the door and bowed.
“Your Highness, sergeant Edge has arrived with a prisoner and awaits new orders.”
“Good, lead us to him, if you please” the Princess of the sun replied with a kind tone.
The guard bowed lower and then reacquired a firm stand, waiting for them to get up and follow him. They travelled through the endless corridors, the guard leading the way, Twilight and her friends in the middle and the princesses in the back; until they stumbled upon a heavy wooden door. They crossed it onto a balcony facing to the mountainside. In the middle of it was the cage with Robert inside.
“You again? How did you manage to arrive before we did?” he asked when he saw Twilight cross the door. He opened his mouth to say something else but then he noticed the Princesses and became silent.
“Twilight, I thought you mentioned that he couldn’t talk,” Celestia stated
“He couldn’t until a few hours ago,” she answered with a trace of nervousness, “he recovered his voice just before he left.”
“Guards, open the cage” ordered Celestia.
Robert left the chariot as soon as he could, as the cage was too small for him to stand up or lay down and he was beginning to feel very stiff. He made eye contact with Princess Celestia, but her overall appearance, especially the flowing mane, was distracting him too much for his own good. ‘Do I have to kneel or something? I really should have read more about pony etiquette’ he thought as the ponies approached him. Princess Celestia was too close for his liking, her eyes were the same level as his and her stare was unsettling. He felt as if her eyes were reading his mind with the wisdom of ages.
“Human, your presence here is unexpected and unwelcome. You’ll reside in the ambassadors’ quarters until the sunrise, when you will state your intentions and answer the questions we may see fit to ask,” she stated with a cold voice, “guards, lead our guest to his chambers and make sure that he is given a proper dinner.”
An unicorn guard motioned to Robert to follow him. The human did so, hoping he hadn’t messed up by ignoring some kind of rules regarding royalty, like kissing their horns or something like that. He apparently didn’t, as nopony reacted negatively while he followed the guard. He was led to a luxurious room with a sumptuous bed, a huge wardrobe with a mirror, a bookshelf, a desk and a private bathroom. He peered through the window and found a marvelous sight of the city and the lands beyond. The door closed behind him and he suspected that he had been caged again. He opened the window, but when he tried to stick his head out he collided with an invisible wall. He opened the door and found a pair of guards standing on its sides.
“Do you know when -OUCH” he had tried to cross the doorframe, subsequently bumping his nose against the magic field and falling down arse first. The guards glanced sideways, their faces immutables, “...as I was saying, do you know when will my dinner arrive? I’m starving.”
“In less than fifteen minutes,” answered the guard on the right, “be careful with the magical field, the more you hit it the stronger it hits back.”
“Thanks for the info” replied Robert as he closed the door, “狗屁! My nose! Fucking magic, how does it work? Joder.”
He muttered a lot of profanities in all the languages he knew while he inspected the room. He was impressed when he found human clothing in the wardrobe, but further inspection revealed that it was a mix of clothing for something with a bigger and more muscular torso than him and something with wings and tail. ‘I will take a wild guess and say that they have taken clothing for minotaurs and small dragons and put it all here... I miss my slippers...’
He was halfway through the wardrobe, having only found two pants and three shirts that fitted him reasonably well, when he heard a knock in the door.
“Come in” he said out of habit.
A female pony dressed as a handmaiden trotted into the room, balancing a tray on her head. He took it from her and put it on the desk. When he turned himself he found the pony staring at him, mouth agape.
“You... probably expected to find a pony or something, right?”
After a few seconds the mare nodded. He shrugged and began eating. A few seconds later he heard the mare leaving and closing the door. Then he noticed that he was eating meat, a juicy steak to be precise. ‘No wonder the poor girl was so shy. On the other hand... at last! A decent piece of meat!’ The only meat he had eaten prior was something suspiciously similar to dog food that Fluttershy gave to the carnivorous animals she took care of. After greatly enjoying his dinner he played with the window’s magic field. He discovered that he could throw objects and they would be ignored, unless he coated them with his saliva. He spent half an hour throwing spitballs and seeing how they bounced back faster each time until one painfully hit him in the right cheek.
After that he went to sleep, feeling like an idiot for hurting himself like that.
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Extra to compensate for the tardy update:
Alternative ending for chapter 5.
Robert felt a pony pulling him with his hooves and recovered his senses.
“TAKE YOUR STINKING HOOVES OFF OF ME YOU DAMN DIRTY PONY!!!” he screamed, his voice hoarse but intelligible.
The three guards took a few steps back and one of them said “He can talk!”
“He can talk, he can talk, he can talk, he can talk, he can talk, he can talk, he can talk” said Daisy, Lily and Rose at the same time.
Robert got up and, with all the power of his lungs, shouted “I CAN SING!”
“Ooooh help me Twilight Sparkle” said Nurse Redheart in distress.
A weird music was played somewhere and the three “flower ponies” sang in chorus.
“Twilight Sparkle, Twilight Sparkle
Twilight Sparkle, Twilight Sparkle
Twilight Sparkle, Twilight Sparkle
Ooooooh Twilight Sparkle”
“Twilight Sparkle, Twilight Sparkle” said Lily alone.
“What is wrong with me?” asked Robert
“I think you’re crazy” replied Twilight.
“I want a second opinion.”
“You’re also lazy”.
The ponies repeated their chorus, circling Twilight as they praised her. Then one of them did breakdance and Lily said “Twilight Sparkle, Twilight Sparkle” in a silly pose.
“Can I play the piano anymore?” asked Robert
“Of course you can” replied Twilight
“Well I couldn't before” said Robert to the shock of everypony, as a piano appeared and he played it.
Then Celestia killed them all before Matt Groening decided to sue The Hub and Hasbro.