Gong Yi Tem Ponies

by TrombonePlayingPony


The Battle with the Kraken

Captain Sweetie Belle of the Crusader Pirates stood at the helm of her ship, the wind blowing through her mane. First Mate Scootaloo sat in the crow’s nest, searching the horizon for any signs of plunder while Engineer Applebloom worked below deck on the cannons.

*     *     *

“Remind me why you are captain again?” Scootaloo grumbled from the laundry basket tied to a pole she sat in.

“Cause you wanted to be the first to swing onto enemy ships, and Applebloom is good at fixing things.” Sweetie Belle explained from her spot on the cardboard box below. “Besides, I’m the most tactile of us all.”

“Ah think you mean tactical.” Applebloom poked her head out of a hole in the top of the box.

“Ya, that. Anyway…”

*     *     *

First Mate Scootaloo looked over the ocean with her telescope before shouting “Land Ho!” Soon they had landed on a small iguanish island and went to the nearby tavern for a drink. The bartender was obviously a local based on his accent.

“What can I get you ninas?”

“Apple juice. Three of them please.” The bartender quickly slid down the table three boxes of juice, the straws having already been pierced through the pain-in-the-flank spots in the top. They sat there, sipping happily before the bartender spoke up again.

“You three wouldn’t happen to be looking for adventure, would ya?” The girls grinned at each other before nodding at the nice human. “Well, word is there’s a secret treasure on an island not too far from here. No who has ever gone to get it has ever returned.”

“They never came back?” Applebloom questioned.

The bartender nodded. “Nope. Not hide nor hair of them was seen again.”

“This sounds like a good adventure to me!” Sweetie Belle declared. “Where can we find this treasure?” The bartender reached under the bar and pulled out a map, a dotted line leading from the island they were on to a big red X.

“The trip is filled with danger. Are you sure you’re up for it?”

The Crusader Pirates all nodded in sync. “We never back down from a challenge!”

“No way!”

“No how!”

“Well than,” the bartender leaned back, “buena suerte to you.” The Crusader Pirates darted back to their ship, eager for adventure. The treasure would not be so easily won however as they first had to tackle with mother nature herself. A great storm blew over their ship, threatening to capsize them as the waves tossed them this way and that.

“Hang on everyone!” Sweetie Belle shouted above the roaring winds. The ocean sprayed in her face. “Pta! Saltwater!” She cried as she stuck out her tongue. Scootaloo in the meantime was holding onto the crow’s nest, her wings fluttering in the wind. That ended up nearly being her downfall as she was suddenly picked up by the air and sent toward the briny deep below. A yellow hoof dived out and caught her own however, Applebloom grunting from the exertion as she pulled her friend back aboard.

“Thanks Applebloom.” She said as the two hugged the mast.

“Sure. What are crusaders for?” Applebloom returned with a smile.

It took some time but they managed to make it through the storm in due time. Unfortunately for them though, there was another band of pirates waiting to keep them from their treasure. And they were skeletal pirates nonetheless! The fiends quickly boarded their ship, forcing them to fend them off with cutlass and well placed bucks.

“He he he he he!” The skeletal captain chuckled. “Your souls will serve for an eternity under my crew.” Scootaloo took this as a challenge as she swiped through another skeletal pirate. She quickly climbed the mast, grabbing the rope that hung there before swinging over, giving the captain a hoof straight to the face. His head went flying out unto the sea, leaving the rest of the crew confused and lost, making them easy pickings for the Crusader Pirates.

They looted the skeletal ship, finding bounties of candy and other sweets to satisfy their sweet tooths before blasting it out of the water. They happily dined on chocolate and caramel apples as they reached the island where the treasure laid.

They made land, and stepped into the thick jungle. The sounds of various wildlife echoed through the trees as they cut their way through the vegetation. Suddenly, tribal chanting could be heard as blow darts embedded themselves in the nearby trees, just barely missing the three pirates. They looked back to see ponies in strange masks charging at them, spurring them to run.

“Maybe we can try to make friends with them?” Sweetie Belle cried out as they ran. Another wave of blow darts stuck into the stone right next to her, causing her to yelp. Applebloom quickly nudged her forward.

“Ah don’t think they’re the friendly kind.” They burst through the tree line to find a rope bridge stretched across a huge chasm. With nowhere else to go, they ran across, the tribals hot on their tails. Once every Crusader Pirate was across, Applebloom kicked one of the supports for the bridge, causing it detach itself from the cliff side. The tribals all screamed as they plummeted into the mist below.

“Aw.” Sweetie Belle looked over the edge. “And I thought their masks were cool looking.” Despite the loss of such craftsmanship, the Crusader Pirates continued on. They soon found an ancient temple, and at the top was a golden crown, sword, and apple. Each one of the girls quickly grab a piece of each before heading back to their ship.

“Well,” Sweetie Belle said, the crown sitting on her head “That was a fine day of-” The remainder of her speech was interrupted as a guttural sound echoed through the water. The pirates all looked to the port side of the ship… ehem, port is the left.

“Oh, sorry.” Scootaloo spoke before turning her head the same direction as the others. There, a massive beast rose from the water, tentacles writhing as it grabbed onto the ship. Its massive maw let out another screech before-

*     *     *

Rarity was not having a good day. She had spent so much time putting together dresses for her friends only to have them not like them, forcing her to make adjustments to their inane specifications. And to have them shown in front of Hoity Toity of all ponies. Oh she would never be able to live down the disgrace, the shame, the-

A strange, gurgling sound was heard from the backyard, making Rarity just curious enough to overcome her mood to check it out. When she opened the door to the backyard though she was not expecting to find what she did.

Strewn about the place was what looked like various objects and scenery, as if someone was directing a movie on a children’s budget. There was a tiny little bar that only had apple juice cartons, a cardboard box dressed up to look like a black pirate ship, a small little rope bridge that was now broken, and a step stool with a box at the top that looked to have held something at some point. Not only that, but they’re were strange puppet like things strewn about, made from sticks though with no seeable way to hold them together other than magic.

The strangest part of this all however was who was in the backyard. Sweetie Belle, Applebloom, and Scootaloo all stood on another pirate ship, this one with their cute little club logo on it. Each of them sported paper hats and wooden swords on their belts, as well as each holding a crown, apple, and sword respectively that looked to have been wrapped in gold foil. Allan, who had been in charge of looking out for the children, was currently standing next to the ‘ship’, covered in strips of her fabric so that he looked wider. A few of his Shen Gong Wu were strewn about the place, hinting at their use in whatever game of pretend they were playing.

When Rarity stepped into the backyard, the four of them freezed as did she. For a while the two parties just looked at each other before Allan got a smirk on his face. The sash he had wrapped around his waist moved around the ship to where Rarity was standing, wrapping around her barrel lightly before holding her above them all. He let out a ‘monster’ roar, giving Rarity an idea as to what was going on.

You know, she thought After the day I’ve had, I guess I could use a bit of fun. Rarity quickly fell into the part of damsel in distress, throwing a hoof over her head as she cried out. Sweetie and the others were quick to jump to her ‘rescue’ and the game continued, all the while she couldn’t help but smile down at the human as he ‘battled’ the fillies.

*     *     *

The day after I played pirate with the little fillies, Rarity’s friends all apologized to her for putting her under such stress. Course, I didn’t really get what the big deal was. A dress was a dress to me. I didn’t say anything though as I didn’t want to ruin the moment. That same day, Rarity came to the temple as soon my free time for the day came around and dragged me to the boutique.

“I told you Rarity.” I said as she pulled me by my sleeve with magic inside her home. “I don’t need you to repay me for taking care of the fillies.”

“Oh, it’s more than that though!” She practically cheered. “When I came out to see you, I was in a horrible mood. You helped me get out of that and I oh so appreciate it.”

I blushed, as per usual. “Hey, what are friends for, right?”

“Yes, friends.” She nodded perhaps a bit too briskly. “Now, as a friend, I want to do something nice for you. So please let me?” She gave me a pout with watery eyes. It was adorable, but yet again I was immune. Still, I could tell Rarity really wanted to show her thanks and I probably wasn’t going to get out of it anyway so I caved.

“Alright, alright. Just nothing with tons of gems or anything all over it, alright?” Rarity squeed and hugged me.

“Oh you won’t regret it! Now come along, I should double check your measurements in case all that training has helped you fill out anymore.”

That seems odd. I thought as she pulled me onto the pedestal. I wouldn’t think two weeks would be enough to see any major difference. I glanced down at her as she wrapped the measuring tape around various parts of my body. Part of me felt she took a bit too long staring at the number. Eh, what do I know? She’s the seamstress, not me.

Once she was done with the measurements, she headed toward her sewing room. “Now don’t go too far. I should have this done in two hours.” She flicked her tail at me before stepping out, leaving me with little to do.

Sweetie’s at school, Twilight is still busy studying the fly trap, Applejack is probably hard at work though she might be at the apple stand. I stepped out into foyer where Dojo was waiting for me. He was quick to take his place around my shoulder as I headed to the door.

“So what’s the plan for today, chum? Kissing babies, shaking hands, signing autographs?”

“Dojo, you do know my job as a defender of Equestria isn’t public knowledge, right?”

“Well what else are ponies going to think about the only human in the universe training in martial arts and using magical weapons? That doesn’t exactly sound like your average babysitter.”

“Hm… true. I just figured everyone thought the temple was a home for me. Not many have actually seen me train, mainly just build the place. Though I guess the whole ‘fight off a giant parasprite’ thing might have hinted at another purpose.”

“Oh, you think?” Dojo asked sarcastically. “So where we actually heading?”

“I figure we’d see if Applejack is in the market and if she isn’t we’ll figure things out from- duck!” I pulled Dojo down as I kneeled down, a flying rainbow object nearly colliding with me… again. This time whoever it managed to pull up and avoid a nasty crash.

“What’s her deal?!” Dojo cried out as he shook like a leaf wrapped tightly around my shoulder.

“Oh that’s just Rainbow. She likes to roughhouse.” I backflipped over another flyby as Rainbow dove at me another time. “Looks like this time she learned how to not crash.”

“And you just let her do this?!”

I shrugged. “I wouldn’t be lying if I didn’t say I enjoyed our first little tussle.” I ducked again, this time grabbing onto Rainbow’s front hooves as she passed by. Soon we were both airborne, Dojo shutting his eyes as we left the ground.

“Dang Allan.” Rainbow grunted. “You’re heavier than I thought you’d be.”

“Hey! That’s muscle, not fat you’re carrying.” She flew toward a flagpole, aiming just right so that as to try and knock me off. I was faster though as I quickly turned myself around and caught it with the back of my knees. I held onto her hooves tightly as we spun around before letting go, her landing with a thud while I just hanged upside down, eyes spinning. Dojo was looking even more green than usual.

“I think…” his cheeks puffed out “I’m gonna be sick!” He quickly leapt off me toward a nearby trash can, the sounds of him losing his lunch following. Once I could tell which direction was up again I flipped myself onto the ground. I gave Rainbow a hand up as she brushed herself off.

“Okay, you definitely won that one.” She smirked. “Though I gotta admit, you look like a monkey hanging from the flagpole like that.”

“Well this monkey just beat your flank. Looks like I’ve got two now.”

“Yep. Guess I’ll have to step up my game before you start catching up. So what were you and that lizard guy doing before I showed up.”

“Lizard?!” Dojo remarked, now standing next to me after having finished puking. Suddenly he grew, wrapping himself around the two of us so he made a kind of wall. His head was held just above me as she breathed steam from his nostrils. “I am not a lizard!”

“Woah! That… is… awesome!”

“Okay, not the reaction I was expecting.” Dojo shrunk back down before returning to his favorite spot. Dash wasn’t done fangirling however.

“How’d you do that? I’ve never seen anyone get so big before! Well, except dragons, but you got as big as they do in like a second!”

Dojo just grumbled something about ‘stupid, legged, ingrates’ while I explained things to Dash. “He is a dragon actually. Just not the same kind of dragon Spike is.”

“I’ve never heard of other kinds of dragons. Are there more of them?”

“They don’t call me Dojo of the Kanojo Cho clan for nothing. There’s a whole family of dragons like me. At least, there was fifteen hundred years ago.” He put a claw to his chin. “I wonder what happened to them actually.”

I shrugged. “I’m sure we’ll figure it out eventually. If not, we can just ask the princesses. They’re, what? Like almost two millennia old? I’m sure they can tell us.” I looked back at Rainbow. “Anyway, you know if Applejack is working the apple stand today? I’ve got about two hours to kill and figured I’d see if she’s doing anything.”

“Nah. She and her family are apple bucking today. With cider season coming soon they need every bit they can get.”

“Dang. Now what do I do for two hours?” Rainbow, Dojo and I stood there a few moments, pondering our choices before Rainbow jumped up.

“Oh I know! How about you show me some of that training you do?”

“And just why do you want to see me train?”

“Cause I bet its awesome! Doing flips and kicks and punches like wah! Heeya! Hiya!” As she spoke she started doing what could only be described as horrible pony kung fu. Dojo seemed to be getting a laugh out of the show while I just shook my head with a smile.

“Alright, if you really want to see how I train I can show you.”

“Oh! I wanna see too Ally!” Pinkie jumped out from behind Rainbow in such a way that past physicists everywhere rolled in their graves. Meanwhile, Dojo and I just had a small heart attack.

“Ack!” Dojo clutched his chest. “Don’t jump out like that!” Pinkie just gasped before somehow jumping onto my other shoulder without tipping me over. She looked over Dojo with extreme interest as she spoke rapid fire.

“Hi! I’m Pinkie Pie! I’ve never met something like you before which is funny cause I thought the last new thing I’d meet would be Allen here but then that minotaur that came to train him showed up and I was ‘no way will there be another new thing’ but here you are. Are you a dragon, cause you look like a dragon, although what happened to your legs?” She gasped. “Did someone steal them? Were you a secret agent and they strapped you to a table and were like ‘goodbye Mister Dojo’ as they left you to your doom with a laser, and the only way you could escape was by removing your own legs?!”

“Uh…” was all Dojo could come up with in response, which is more than what I managed my first bout of Pinkie nonsense. I picked the incredibly light mare off my shoulder and placed her on the ground in front of me.

“Yes he’s a dragon. No, no one stole his legs. He was just born that way. Also, how did you know he was called Dojo?”

“He looks like a Dojo. Oh wait, I didn’t mean he looked like a place kung fu master’s train, although that would be really cool! Imagine if you could train your kung fu inside a dragon! Wouldn’t that be amazing?”

“No thanks. I’ve already been in one stomach and that’s was one too many for my lifetime. Anyway, you wanna find a quiet place for me to show you guys how I train?”

“Oh ya! Let’s go out by the Whitetail Woods.” Rainbow took to the sky while Pinkie hopped after her. I just walked at my own pace as Dojo finally processed everything that just happened.

“Did that girl just suggest you learn martial arts in my stomach?”

I shrugged. “It’s Pinkie Pie. Don’t question it.”

*     *     *

I sat crosslegged in a small clearing in the Whitetail Woods, my eyes closed as I meditated. Dojo, Rainbow, and Pinkie sat off to my side as I simply cleared my mind of any distractions.

Especially the distractions from an impatient pegasus.

“I’m bored! When are you going to get to training Allan?”

“This is training Rainbow.” I said without moving. “Master Gongniu says that mastery of one’s self starts from within.”

“Well can’t you skip this part and just show us the cool stuff?” I continued to sit there as Rainbow returned to her groaning. I wasn’t about to skip steps but I did try to speed it up for those watching.

“Alright than.” I stood up and stretched a bit. “Now we can get to the physical part.” Both Rainbow and Pinkie squirmed where they sat as I took my fighting stance and breathed. For awhile I didn’t move, just allowing the wind to blow lightly over the forest.

“Um… Allan?” Rainbow called again. “You gonna-” She didn’t finish as I leapt into the air, grabbing onto a branch and launching myself through the trees. I leapt like a ninja, branch to branch, adding in a few flips and running up and down tree trunks just to show off. I landed back where I started before relaxing and glancing over at my audience. Dojo was still asleep, as he had been from the start, while Rainbow and Pinkie were both just looking at me in shock.

“Woah…” was the first word Rainbow spoke. I blushed a bit as I began to feel kind of off with how they were treating me. “That was so cool!”

“Way to go Ally! Woo hoo!” Pinkie cheered, waking Dojo up from where he slept on a branch and startling him into falling off. “Whoops. Sorry Dojo.”

The dragon just grumbled before getting up. “Alright, is this little show over with? Cause I think it’s about time we got back to Rarity’s.”

“Huh. Good point Dojo. Let’s get going.” I held an arm out for him to slide up before waving to the two mares. “Sorry to cut this short but I shouldn’t keep the lady waiting.”

Pinkie and Rainbow waved goodbye as I headed back into town. By now I knew the way to Rarity’s like the back of my hand so it took no time at all to find myself back in the boutique.

“Oh Allan! Is that you?” Rarity called from the back. I let Dojo slide off onto a pillow Rarity had set out before heading toward her voice.

“Ya, it’s me. I figured it has been about two hours so-” The two of us ran into each other as I turned the corner, myself letting her push into me so she took less of the fall. This landed us with her in my lap and I on my butt.

“Oof! Sorry about that Rar-” I looked at her to see she was red in the face and looking up at me. “Uh, Rarity? You there senorita?”

She cleared her throat, suddenly looking anywhere but me as she climbed off. “Oh sorry about that Allan! I must not have been looking where I was going.”

I shrugged as I got up. “No worries. You alright though?”

“Perfectly fine. Now, let me show you what I made.” She quickly turned, pulling out a suit on a hanger. It was like normal suits for the most part. Black jacket, white shirt, black pants. A nice light blue flower adorned the left side and the buttons on the chest and sleeves seemed to be made of a gem that was white like diamonds.

“So… what do you think?” Rarity actually seemed nervous about what I was going to say about her work. Maybe she isn’t feeling well after all the work recently.

“It’s great Rarity. Muy bien. It’ll do perfectly for the gala.” Rarity sighed in relief before floating the ensemble over to me. I hung it over my arm and was about to say my goodbyes when she suddenly spoke up.

“By the way, do you know what you are going to wear for Nightmare Night?”

Wear for… I facepalmed. Right, pony Halloween. Can’t believe I forgot. “I haven’t gotten anything together yet, though I do have an idea if you are willing to help me.”

“But of course Allan! What were thinking for your costume?”

“Well…”