//------------------------------// // And Then There Were Fanboys // Story: The Equestrian Edda // by Grey Ghost //------------------------------// After saying their farewell to Watchless Ben, and seeing that he could still have a future as a hero with the Plumbers, Ben Prime, Ben, and Jason arrived via portal just outside Mr. Smoothie. Jason and Ben both looked around in awe at seeing the world that they only knew of through television. “Suck on this, boys back home,” Ben whispered to himself as he put his hands in his jacket pockets. “Now this, is a dream come true!” “Heh... lets hope it tastes good.” Jason said a grin growing across his face. Ben looked down at his own smoothie and tasted it experimentally. He smiled, same as Jason, as they gulped it down. “Ah,” Ben said as he finished the drink. “Okay, I need the recipes for these. Beats water, milk, and cider any day.” “I live off mead and wine now,” Jason said, looking at his now empty cup. “Though, that was pretty good.” “I have bad memories of alcohol... especially after that disaster at Yellowstone,” Ben shuddered. “That was the worst thing ever.” “Did you destroy your world or something?” Tennyson asked, sipping from his smoothie. “...” Ben looked away in silence, sipping on his second smoothie, not looking at either of them. “Why does that not surprise me,” Jason said with a sigh. “You do the most insane things Ben.” “The strange thing is I never got caught. I still have no idea how I almost set off that volcano... or how I got to Chernobyl.” “Your world is insane, and this is coming from a guy with an uncle who’s a giant wolf,” Jason said, shaking his head. “Don’t I know it,” Ben said with a shrug. He turned to Tennyson who was looking at him in a little bit of shock mixed with respect. “You hear some weird stuff out of the Displaced. Remember that.” “On that we agree. You should really met Gilgamesh, Tennyson, that guy is a riot,” Jason said, with a smirk. “Giga-who?” Tennyson asked, confused. “Gilgamesh, the very definition of crazy,” Ben sighed. “He’s nuts, that’s what he is. A mental patient in waiting.” “He has his moments,” Jason said with a shrug. “Helped me out a lot, I’ll tell you what.” “I was there, remember?” Ben said as he started on his third smoothie. “I meant even before that goof,” Jason said, taking out a flask, taking a long guzzle out of it. “Man that stuff is good...” Ben and Tennyson both stared at Jason in shock. “What?” he asked, looking at them. “Are you seriously drinking?!” Ben asked, looking slightly aghast. “Dude, kids are around!” “I live off the stuff, I mean actually need this to survive,” Jason said, rolling his eyes. “You guys certainly are something, buuuut,” Ben and Jason turned to Tennyson, their eyes going wide at the ten empty cups, and the quickly draining eleventh. “Smoothie drinkers, you are not.” “Well, dang,” Ben said shaking from his shock. “I guess that’s what happens when you try to best the master.” “Heh, I suppose you're right B,” Jason said laughing a little. “So... now what?” Just as Jason asked that, a familiar van pulled up to the side of the road in front of them. In the driver’s seat was Tennyson’s partner in heroics, Rook. “Ben! Where have you been? You missed the bi-weekly Plumbers meeting, again!” “Oh hey, it’s that guy,” Jason said with a wave. “Awesome!” Ben shouted. “It’s Rook! Cool!” Rook, on the other hand, was looking at the three highly confused. Especially after he caught glances of all three wearing Omnitricies. “...Ben? What’s going on?” “Weird multiverse stuff my friend,” Jason said with a laugh. “You get used to it after a while.” “Um... okay. I am going to assume that means Professor Paradox is involved.” “That would be correct,” Ben said as he finished another smoothie. “So... ‘sup Rook?” Jason asked with a smirk. Rook sighed, dragging his hand over his face. “Magister Tennyson needs to see you.” Rook opened the door then glanced at the other two Omnitrix wearers. “The two of you should probably come along as well.” “See Plumber HQ?” Ben asked with a growing smile. “Heck to the yeah!” “These two are Ben and Jason,” Tennyson said getting up, gesturing for the Displaced to follow. “This is gonna be awesome!” This had to be one of the better days in Ben’s life. “So, did you guys ever try to find Blukic and Driba?” Jason asked as they followed Rook and Tennyson into the base. “We did not even know they were missing. We just assumed they were busy working on something,” Rook answered as they rode the elevator down. “They got stuck as breezies for a while,” Jason said, shaking his head. “Annoying little bastards.” “Do you really need the language, Jay?” Ben asked, getting a little tired of it. “Yes I do, I will not censor myself Ben,” Jason said, crossing his arms. “Are you two sure you’re friends?” Tennyson asked, raising an eyebrow. “I don’t have friends,” Ben answered with a shrug. “I have creatures that I stand to be around. As long as they’re not human, I can at the very least tolerate them.” “I’m not human,” Jason chirped, leaning on the wall. “You look human,” Tennyson spoke up. “Nah, I’m Jotun,” Jason clarified, a smirk on his face. “Whatever the heck that is,” Ben said with a smile. “At least you’re not a jerk anymore.” “Jotun come from Jotunheim, there were two types, ice and rock... now their restless spirits are the windigos.” “...I’ll stick with Greek. It makes more sense to me.” “Those guys rape people with no remorse.” Jason said with a look of disgust. “That was only Zeus, everyone else was consensual.” “Poseidon raped Medusa.” “She doesn’t exist in Equestria. That was back on Earth before people stopped believing.” “This is a very enlightening topic,” Rook said as he wrote down their whole conversation in his little book. “He’s like Twilight,” Jason said with a laugh. “It’s rather cute really.” “Cute?” Rook asked, looking very confused. “How is proper note taking cute? Is this something of your culture I have yet to study?” “It’s just, you remind me of someone who does the same thing. A purple alicorn princess by the name of Twilight Sparkle.” “Alicorn?” Tennyson and Rook asked. “Winged unicorn,” Ben filled in. “A lot of ponies in our world.” Jason said. “I could demonstrate if you’d like.” “Same,” Ben said as he raised his watch. “Though I mostly stick with my pegasus form.” “Omnitrix, Stardust.” he commanded, shifting into his alicorn form. Tennyson and Rook both stared at him like that, until Tennyson burst out laughing, even to the point of crying. Jason glared, gripping Tennyson up in his magic, squeezing. “I could crush your throat with my mind kid.” “Okay, okay... its just, it looks so lame!” Tennyson said before Jason dropped him on his head. “Jerk...” he muttered, getting to his feet. “Don’t laugh at me then,” Jason said, adjusting his wings. “I take back what I said,” Ben said looking at Tennyson then back to Jason. “You are still a jerk.” Tennyson crossed his arms, mumbling to himself. “Is he always like this?” Jason asked, looking at Rook. “No, mostly he’s arrogant, lazy, and a bit self-absorbed.” “Sounds about right,” Tennyson said with a smirk. Finally, the elevator shaft ended, revealing the Plumbers’ Headquarters in its entirety. Ben and Jason both stared in awe, as Tennyson and Rook watched on with smiles. “Like what you see?” Rook asked sincerely. “Ben likey,” he said in awe. “Bigger than I expected,” Jason said walking around. “Sup,” he said, waving to some plumbers, who stared at him. “I think they’re surprised to see us, Jason ol’ buddy.” Ben smirked as he saluted a few of the passing magisters. “Well good, they need more ponies in their lives,” Jason said with a big smirk. “You two are weirdos. Big weirdos,” Tennyson said, rolling his eyes. “Keep that up and I’ll bring Hodgepodge out,” Jason warned. “You mean that strange looking thing made out of all of those animals?” “Yes,” Jason said, nodding. “That one.” “Don’t mess with a draconequus. They don’t play fair,” Ben warned them, speaking on high experience. “Hodgepodge is cool... he’s more of a troll than anything,” Jason said, shrugging. “He mostly spouts internet memes and the more stupid tidbits I have rattling around my head.” “What’s a meme?” Ben asked, sounding completely confused. “I’m not touching that.” Tennyson said, putting his hands up. “I’ve had a hard enough time trying to explain it to Rook.” “I too am still confused by the World Wide Web. Perhaps we could collaborate into understanding together, Mr. Ten.” “Just Ben, please, Rook,” Ben said with a wave of his hand. “But if you have to use an honorific, it would be Prince Ten. And no, I don’t mess with the internet. It doesn’t serve any purpose outside of educational research.” “If we’re doing titles, I’m a prince as well.” Jason spoke up, “And a god.” Ben rolled his eyes. “I’m not ever considering you a god, Jay. Sorry, can’t do it.” “I didn’t ask you to,” Jason said, “I don’t want people worshipping me. That’s a little creepy.” “You lost me.” Tennyson said, looking between the two. “In our respective worlds, gods are real. In Jason’s, the Norse myths are what rule. In mine, it’s the Greek with a little Roman thrown in here and there.” “The Romans just stole the Greek myths and renamed them,” Jason quipped, spreading his wings out boredly. “They created some of their own, too, Jason. I don’t go baggin’ on your beliefs, don’t bag on my family. And why are you still transformed?” Ben cocked an eyebrow at him. “What’s the point?” “I find it fascinating,” Rook said as he measured Jason’s wingspan. “Very educational for the records.” “I feel like it B,” Jason said, looking at Rook. “Wanna see something cool?” “Oh yes, please. Show me what it is that is ‘cool’.” Jason tapped his Omnitrix, shifting into Razor. His body was consumed in green flame and in his place appeared a perfect copy of Rook. “Hello, my name is Rook Blonko, nice to meet you.” “Whoa!” Rook said as the two proceeded to perform the classic mirror gag. Ben facepalmed. “You and your changelings. Weird bug-pony things.” “That thing is awesome!” Tennyson exclaimed as he watched Jason continue to screw with Rook. ”Which alien is that?” he asked, browsing through all his new forms. “It’s called a changeling,” Ben answered, moving off to lean on the rails. “I can’t wait to try these all out!” Tennyson said, looking like a kid at Christmas. “Just make sure you’re in a large area when you use the dragon,” Ben cautioned. “Here we go!” Tennyson shouted, slamming the dial down, expecting something awesome, only to get a breezie instead. “What the heck is this thing?” Ben stifled a laugh. “That’s a breezie. One of the weakest, if not the weakest, creature in all of Equestria.” “Those two Galvan are stuck as breezies,” Jason said, snickering as his Omnitrix timed out. “Think of them as pony fairies.” “This is so lame,” he pouted, crossing his arms. “You didn’t get it from me,” Ben smirked. “I don’t have a breezie form.” “I got a lot of forms Ben doesn’t, I actually try to scan things, and I usually leave auto-scan on,” Jason said, taking a jab at Ben. “Because you actually care,” Ben countered with a smirk. “I don’t care about the Omnitrix. I don’t need it except to save my mental state. I can survive on my own, thank you very much.” “See? Lazy.” “Lazy? How am I lazy? I’m quick, man. Ya gotta be to survive on your own.” “As can I,” Jason said, looking at him. “So you’re just lazy. Ben doesn’t do more than he actually has to.” “No duh. I do what I need to and that’s all. What else am I supposed to do?” “Make sure all the races have a back up, idiot.” “I am the backup, nimrod.” “Thats not what I meant, fool.” “Enough of this,” Ben sighed. “You rely on the watch, I barely use it, case closed.” “Well this certainly is unexpected,” Max cut in, having spotted the group. “Didn’t think I’d see you again, Jason. Especially not here.” “Sup, Max,” he said, giving a wave. “You know Max Tennyson?” Ben asked, a little surprised. “I visited Jason’s universe following some Incursean activity,” Max explained. “They tried to take over the planet. Rainbow Dash used the power of Bifrost to show them the door rather quickly,” Jason said with a smirk. “That was about the the time when Azmuth detected another Omnitrix and asked me to investigate,” Max added. “Wow, I still have to deal with Fear. Our timelines are so screwed up." “Bah, we can deal with whatever the worlds decide to throw at us, Ben,” Jason said, “We’re heroes, remember?” “Yeah, yeah. Help the needy, protect the ponies, bad things happen, somewhat happy ending. Yay.” “You’re such a downer,” Jason said, rolling his eyes. “It’s like watching an old married couple,” Tennyson said, resting on Rook’s shoulder. Ben slowly turned to glare at Tennyson. “Shut it, Tennyson.” “Ben wishes he could get someone as awesome as me,” Jason teased. “Mah barn door don’t swing that way, darlin’,” Ben said with a faux southern accent. “I’d throw myself to Lyra before ever going after you.” “Is this usually how Earth friendships are?” Rook asked Tennyson. “It seems more insulting than anything else.” “You should see how Twilight and I are,” Ben quipped. “Eh, it’s just that me and Ben have such abrasive personalities,” Jason said with a shrug, “You should see us when we really ague.” “Oh gods,” Ben said as he put his hand to his face and chuckled. “Remember the Ansem thing? Hoo, wow, that was heated.” “Yeah, I wonder what happened to that guy after we purified the Empire?” Jason asked, watching some Plumbers walk by. “He’s probably dead,” Ben said nonchalantly as he peered down to the lower levels. “That sounds unfortunate,” Rook commented, not fully understanding what they were talking about. “Eh, darkness cannot be destroyed, only channeled,” Jason commented as Tennyson reverted to normal, crushing Rook under his weight. “I still say he’s dead.” Ben looked at Max and waved again. “So, uh, question. Any chance we could get a full tour? Is there, like, protocol for extradimensional beings coming to visit or something?” “You’d be surprised, really,” Max said with a chuckle. “But, I do believe I can arrange for a tour.” He fist pumped. “Yes! This is gonna rock! I get to see the actual villains from the show!” Max just shook his head. “Follow me please,” he said, starting to walk away. Ben skipped one step before walking up to Max’s side, still in awe of the place. “Ya know, I should build some place like this back in Equestria. Have my own underground lair, like a personal Batcave. That’d be sweet.” “If I wanted that I’d restore Valhalla,” Jason said as he followed Ben, hands in his pockets. “What do you even do in Equestria?” asked Tennyson as he and Rook followed just behind. “Usually? Nothing,” Ben shrugged. “I used to be a diplomat, but I’m pretty behind on the times. Being stuck in stone for a few millennia will do that to ya.” “I do a lot of things,” Jason said, looking back at him, “Normally it’s just royal duties, but things get crazy every once in a while... like going to that high school dimension...” he said with a shudder. Ben laughed out loud. “You went to that crazy place? HA! Oh, boy, I still remember when ol’ Sombra made that freaky mirror. Craziest thing he ever did, that nervous little unicorn. Though, it was nice seeing the stone age up close.” “Everypony was a high schooler, even me, god that a was weird place,” he said, shaking his head. Rook continued to write down everything. “This could make an exceptional novel,” he commented. Ben chuckled, the euphoria just glowing from him. “Ah, this all takes me back. The good times, the bad times, the exceptionally bad times. Ah, memories.” “Yeah, though I still hated the Omniverse redesigns,” Jason commented, moving some hair out of his face. “You’re just jealous Tennyson and I have the better watch.” Ben and Tennyson high fived. “You both have that stupid iPhone watch,” Jason countered, “Mine actually looks like an advanced piece of technology.” “No, it looks like you have a worm on your wrist,” Ben counter countered. “It’s not supposed to be obvious you’re wearing the most high tech piece of equipment in existence.” “Bah, we’ll never agree on this,” Jason said, shaking his head. “I’m gonna say that’s a win for me.” Ben smiled confidently as he and Tennyson shared a fist bump of victory. “You don’t even use yours properly,” Jason said, giving Ben a glare. “Would you if you had my curse?” Ben asked with a daring look. “Yes Ben, I would. I’d get as many scans as possible so I could bring all of those species back if they go extinct.” “I would rather fight to keep those species alive and in peace with the rest of the world. The more you use that watch, the more dependent you become on it. The Omnitrix’s purpose for me is to keep me sane and alive. Did you already forget what happened when Azmuth took it off of me? That wasn’t just pain, Jason. If he hadn’t put that watch back, I would’ve died.” “So instead of just taking a scan as a back up you’d rather be lazy about it?” Jason asked, crossing his arms. “Did I ever say I didn’t have scans?” “Does anyone else feel like, what is the expression? A fourth wheel?” asked Rook. “Can we, you know, have some fun and not listen to you guys argue?” Tennyson asked with a frown. “Sorry,” Ben admitted. “I get a little heated when others question my reasonings. It’s just better off I don’t use the watch all the time.” “What possible reason could you have to not use the Omnitrix?” asked Rook, looking between Jason and Ben. “The Omnitrix is a powerful device that even Ben admits he needs.” “Meh, I’ve needed it less and less, I got magic, motherfucker!” Jason said with a smirk. “Language, man!” Ben chided. “This is a kid’s show, watch it! Besides, magic is weird.” “I feel very much ignored,” Rook commented before sighing. “It’s like having three Bens around.” “Sorry Rook, I get caught up in the moment rather easily, and B, I’m not going to censor myself,” Jason said, letting a multicolored distortion form in his hand. “Well, if you ever come around my place with that mouth and… that,” he pointed at the ball of magic. “I’m kicking your hind-end out of the castle.” “You could try, though I imagine it’d be like Hulk Vs. Juggernaut and we’d be locked in place via stalemate.” Jason said, letting the ball dance on his fingers. “Hulk vs. the what now? Nevermind,” Ben shook his head. “I hate pop culture, anyway, no language in my world, Jason. You do, and Imma kick yer butt. Okay? I don’t need my daughter learning such things from a jerk.” “You have a daugher?” “Adopted.” Ben shrugged. “No big whoop.” “Yeah, me and my spouses are working on kids now,” Jason said with a chuckle, “Hey, you guys got a training room?” “Of course, it’s this way,” Max said, turning a corner and bringing them into a rather large room, about the size of a football field. “Oh, this is good for me!” Jason said cracking his knuckles, “How about some practice, hmm?” Ben held up his hands. “I’m no fighter, Jason. You know that. I only fight when I need to.” “You know, I’d love to see you guys go at it,” Tennyson said, looking between the two, “I wanna see what you guys can really do.” “Aw, why’d do you have to say that?” Ben complained. “How am I supposed to turn you down, huh? That’s just not cool, dude.” “Ben’s not very good when it comes to his idols, apparently,” Jason said with a snicker, leaning on the wall, “So, I take it thats a yes then?” Ben stuttered for a minute before slumping with a sigh. “Alright, fine. I’ll do it.” “Oh good, now we can spend the next hour trying to one-up each other,” Jason said, taking off his coat and shirt, tossing them to Rook, “Hold those for me, I don’t want them getting ruined. “Don’t go showing off,” Ben remarked, moving to the center ring. “This is a sparring match, not see how much we can beat the crap out of each other.” “I’ll keep that in mind,” Jason said, cracking his neck. He got into a stance, watching Ben closely. Ben took a deep breath and let it out slowly, standing perfectly still. “Alright, Jason. Let’s see what a youngin’ can do. Bring it.” “Don’t call me that,” Jason said with a roll of his eyes, “It ill suits you.” He smirked. “Just fight already. We’ll see if that windbag of a fighter actually taught you something or not.” Jason was in his face in an instant, throwing a punch at his face. It was caught by Ben’s hand just as fast. “Nice footwork,” he commented with a smile. “Still needs work though.” He kicked Jason’s legs out from under him and jumped away. “Or does it?” Jason asked from behind him, hitting him with an open palm strike. “Ben, I’m descended from Loki, illusions are my thing, keep that in mind.” “Certainly,” Ben said, rubbing his back. “So why don’t we make things a little more even on my side of things, eh?” He dialed into his watch and transformed into a furry, canine-like pony. “Lupin, at your displeasure!” “Well now, that is certainly a most interesting creature,” Rook commented. “I would love to get a closer look at it.” “Not even gonna ask, Ben,” Jason said with a shake of his head. He paced around the pony before darting forward, aiming to sweep Ben off his feet. The wolf-pony closed his eyes, kicking back Jason’s strike. Jason cringed, throwing his hand out, sending Ben flying with a blast of air. Ben went rolling, but quickly used the momentum to land on his hooves. “Come on Jason!” he declared. “Show me something new.” “Ok then, you asked for it,” Jason said with a chuckle, “Omnitrix, Second Sight,” he commanded, shifting into Mewtwo. “The heck is that thing?” Tennyson asked, looking at Jason with a mix of awe and disgust. Ben’s eyes widened at the sight. “...Benny want.” “Later,” Jason said before hurling a shadow ball at Ben. “Nyah!” he shouted, dodging the attack. “Don’t wanna do that! Okay, maybe Lupin wasn’t my best idea. Gah!” he shouted running from Jason’s relentless bombardment. “You did ask for this,” Jason reminded, hurling another shadow ball at him, a smirk on his face. “Yeah, I did, and now I’m regretting it, so!” He quickly typed into his watch and transformed into his Gengar form. “Let’s even the odds with Shadow, shall we?” He fired a quick nightshade from his eyes, striking Jason’s left shoulder. “Gah!” Jason hissed, floating back, “Ok, lets up the ante.” He tapped the Omnitrix, shifting into Mega Mewtwo Y. He smirked, darting forward and attacking with a thunder punch. “Enope!” Ben sneered, sinking into his own shadow just as Jason passed over him. He popped back out behind Jason and slammed into his back. “Shadow sneak, always goes first.” Jason reeled before spinning around and slamming an ice punch into Ben’s face. The Gengar staggered back, his smile literally frozen. “S-s-sooo not c-c-cool, dude!” Ben groaned, slapping the Omnitrix back into his normal form, shattering the ice. “Yeesh, I think I got freezer burn.” “Sucks to be you,” Jason commented, using bulk up before flying forward with a dynamic punch. “Woah!” Ben said, putting up his wrist in defense. “Shield!” The watch beeped, creating its energy shield, Jason slamming right into it. “Ow...” Jason said, rubbing his head, “Totally forgot about that...” “You’re slipping, kid,” Ben smirked. “Or am I?” Jason asked as his body glowed blue and Ben was raised into the air and tossed around like a rag doll. Ben groaned as he hit the floor. “So…. not… cool... ow.” Just as Jason picked him up again, Ben decided to give him a quick taste of his archery skills. “Omnitrix, bowcaster!” The watch quickly turned into an energy crossbow and fired right into Jason’s chest… dropping Ben ten feet back to the ground. “Oh come on!” he groaned. Before Ben could recover, Jason lunged on top of him, sword to his throat, “Ha...” he panted, having reverted to normal. “Congrats,” Ben laughed, “You beat a pacifistic old man. How do you feel now?” “Not a good as I look,” he said with a laugh, getting up and putting his sword away. He looked down at Ben, holding his hand out. Ben reached up grabbed his hand, Jason pulled him up to his feet. “Of course the barbarian would win,” he joked, playfully punching Jason’s shoulder. “I am not a barbarian,” Jason snorted, rolling his eyes. The two heard clapping from the sidelines, remembering that they were basically a show. “That was most amazing, you two!” Rook applauded. “Thanks,” Jason said, walking over, “Well I think we should be getting home.” He turned to Ben, “You ready?” “You guys are leaving already?” Tennyson asked with a frown, “I was hoping you’d stay longer...” “Yeah well, I have a kingdom to get back to,” Jason said with a shrug, “And I’m sure Ben has stuff he has to do as well.” “‘Has to’, definitely not ‘wants to’,” Ben clarified. “I hate work.” “Of course you do,” Jason said with a smirk, “So... yeah I suppose this is goodbye.” “Don’t worry, Tennyson. If you ever need any help, you can contact either of us whenever. So see ya around!” “Omnitrix, Hodgepodge,” Jason commanded, shifting forms, “Come on, we have things to do,” he said. Grabbing a zipper that had appeared out of nowhere in midair, the draconequus unzipped a portal. “Ladies first,” he said, smirking at Ben. “Then why are you looking at me?” Ben asked with a smirk. He gestured towards the portal. “Ladies first.” “I insist, Jen,” Hodgepodge said, snapping his fingers. “Hodge, I swear if you just gender swapped me, I’m not getting you a Hearth’s Warming present.” He just laughed, patting Jen’s head, “Oh, you weren’t going to get me one anyway, liar,” he said, pushing her through the portal. “Th-Th-thats all folks!” he said, looking into the fourth wall and giving a wink before zipping the portal up behind them.