Please, don't believe what you see in the movies, or read in romance novels. Having someone sleeping on your shoulder, is actually quite numbing. And uncomfortable. Within minutes after closing my eyes, I immediately re-open them. I can't sleep at all. Not like this.
But she looks so peaceful, another voice popped up in my head, arguing. Surely, you can take something like this? It's not everyday where you actually get the chance to be this close to your crush. I admit, I agree wholeheartedly. This kind of good fortune don't grow on trees you know.
But who am I kidding? If not for me, at least for her. I don't want her to wake up the following morning with neck pains. But if I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna have to do this right. After a deep breath, I slowly, carefully moved my left arm behind her until my hand reached her shoulder, making sure at the same time that her head isn't wobbling about. With my free arm, I gently scooped her from beneath her knees, and lifted her up.
Yeah, I carried her like a princess. An adorable one too. And no, she didn't weight like a feather. Between you and me... she's quite heavy. I tried not to stumble as I made my way towards my bed, praying quietly to myself that Sunset doesn't wake up suddenly.
As I lay her down onto my bed, Sunset mumbled a little in her sleep. D'awww, she's so cute.
I don't own a blanket, but I don't want to leave her unprotected. So, I quickly grabbed my old jacket from my wardrobe and covered her with it. Better than nothing I suppose.
I stood next to the bed for a while, gazing at Sunset Shimmer. Her sleeping face was enough to make me smile. A face with peace drawn all over it.
Some of you might say that it's creepy. Standing there, watching her sleep. Yeah, it actually kinda is.
The candle on the table has melted and was now slowly reaching its waxy end. I can't sleep in the bed now, since it's already occupied. I don't really have a couch either, only chairs. The floor perhaps? Nah... too woody...and hard. I sighed, and sat down on the floor, resting my back on the side of my bed.
My bed made a faint squeaking noise, and I heard Sunset shifting in the bed. At least she's comfortable. I should sleep too. For real this time, without the numbness and stuff.
Pillow-less and blanket-less, I crossed my arms together, and closed my eyes.
* * * * * *
"YOU USELESS PIECE OF SHIT!"
A huge hand came falling down hard onto my cheek, causing it to turn red instantly. I tried to fight back the tears but to no avail. There was nothing I could do. I could only stand there in my room, dressed only in my underwear. Unmoving because of fear and hatred. Because of him.
"YOU SHOULD DIE LIKE THE FILTH YOUR PARENTS WERE!"
Another hand came, harder than before. My tears flowed mercilessly out of my eyes. I sobbed, as the blows continued to come.
There was no escape from his house. There were only the two of us. No one will come to the rescue. Nobody cared. I was alone. All alone. With no one to turn to. No shoulder to cry on. No body to hug. Nothing. Just me and my abusive uncle.
"SHIT LIKE YOU DON'T EVEN DESERVE TO BE ALIVE!"
More blows. My face was no longer the target, as his hands started hitting me all over. He punched me in the stomach, kicked me in the legs. I wanted to fight back. To run. Flee. But I'm just a kid. I'm pathetic. Weak. Useless. All those thoughts of escaping, all those thoughts of fighting back. I couldn't do any of them. I could only whimper.
"Please...please stop."
"SHUT UP!"
"Stop it...please!"
"I SAID SHUT THE FU---"
"Wake up!"
* * * * * *
I blinked, and opened my eyes. The power had came back, filling my apartment with the same dim light. The fire on the candle had long since died, leaving a pool of dried wax on the table.
I could feel two warm hands placed on either side of my cheeks. I blinked a few more times, only to find out that I've been crying. Sunset Shimmer was kneeling on the floor beside me, her face close to mine, with a look of concern and worry. She rubbed my cheeks with her thumbs, and gently lifted my head up to eye-level with her.
We stared at each other for a moment, before I quickly pulled myself away from her grasp. How could I show such a pathetic side of me to her? Of all times, why do I have to remember about that memory now?
I buried my face into my arms, rubbing away the remains of my tears as I did so. I can't let Sunset see me like this. A man doesn't cry. No...a man never cries. She's probably thinking less of me now. And here I thought we had a good thing going. There goes my chance. Heh, as if I ever had a chance to begin with.
I felt a warm hand rubbing my back tenderly. It was...comforting. But I still can't show her my face. Not like this.
"S-sorry." Great...even my voice is shaking.
The hand didn't stop rubbing. "Why are you apologizing?"
"I...I showed you a side of me that wasn't meant for you. For anyone."
Sunset's hand stopped rubbing my back. I felt her hand softly grabbing onto my shoulder. "That doesn't explain why you apologized." she said.
"I cried! In front of you!" I lifted my head up to face her. Fighting back the stupid tears that doesn't seem to want to disappear. "Of all the people, you were the last one I want to see me crying." I turned away. Somehow, looking at her face only makes it more difficult to hold back my tears.
"You must think I'm pathetic and weak." And why wouldn't she? I vowed to myself to never ever cry again after leaving my uncle's house. I wanted to be strong. I wanted to prove to myself that I have changed. I wanted to be more mature, more independent. Yet, here I am, crying from a memory that I thought I had buried deep in my mind.
I'm still weak.
I'm still useless.
"Hey..." Sunset's soft voice came from beside me. She placed a hand on my cheek and turned my face towards her. I didn't resist. We both stared deeply into each other eyes. Her's shining. Mine wet. She pulled me closer.
"Listen..." she spoke gently, slowing resting her forehead against mine. "Crying doesn't mean you're pathetic, or weak or useless." Both her hands were on my cheeks again. Warming my face. "It just means you've been strong for too long."
I let my tears flow.