//------------------------------// // Five Nights With Shining Armor // Story: The Prompt Pit // by Regina Wright //------------------------------// I was born to be a smoker, therefore I don't have the healthy lungs to be out-running a pack of psychos. Or possibly even the mental capability to think myself out of this situation. There's probably a lot of things I could be doing right now to assure my survival but there's nothing that is going to move me from this smoke break. Today, I might die as a smoker with a Marlboro blunt wrapped around my cracked lips. I wish I felt something but I'm too tired for a pity party. Despite the smoke passing my lips, stinking up the room and ash flaking on the marble floor, this wasn't a waiting game. This wasn't a wait to the sun hits the skies and those walking monster drop dead out there. They knew it and I knew it, today was the day I've slipped up. The sound of their damned hooves weren't going to go away. Two hours ago, I would have said the sounds of their pawing and that awful 'clop clop' they make when they bang their hooves against wood was the second most hated sound in the world. But now, it's like a lullaby. Luring me into a unsuspecting hell. It seemed I've been slipping into rings of hell since I got here. Here in 'Who The Fucks Knows Where, Equestria.' All I wanted was some R&R on the company budget. Not to get summoned and dropped as a... God, I can't think of anything. I'm tripping on sleep fumes and no matter how much I puff, I just can surmount enough energy to try anything else. I'm certain that the barricade I cobbled up would hold. Maybe? I spent a good thirty minutes circulating this set of chamber rooms, knocking over the dusty dressers and hauling trunks situated here. Brought over the fancy end tables and yanked off the curtains from the wide windows, revealing the night sky. I tied the doorknob of the door leading to the adjacent door and tricked those psycho to chase me through the other door. Then pushed with weak-sauce arms and shaking knees my mother always said I would need one day those dressers to block the other way in. And since I'm a smoker, I could only do so much. The door where all of them are waiting for me (because they're too stupid to try the other door, thank god) was slightly open despite my effort and it was my back keeping their forehooves from wedging it open. There's so many of them that if they really wanted to, they could storm their way in here. But they're uh... Loopy as shit. Only one of the ten Royal Guards out there needs to press their beef-cake hoof into the door and I'd be boned. And that's not counting the medical staff of three doctors and four nurses frothing and bumping their way into the front of the pack. The world's getting blurry and the floor looking pretty inviting. Shit. Time for another dose from Mr. Cig. There's only so much this butt of a cigarette can do for me. The rest of my vacation supply are in my guest rooms, waiting for me. Man, I should've grabbed a full pack. I took a sweet, sweet drag. Mmh, the nicotine bleached all of my worries and I'm- Shit, I felt my eyes close. The cig isn't going to be helping me stay awake for much longer. My nose wiggled, smelling the rubber ball tang of magic. That fucker was going to be showing up after all. Looks like my little errand didn't get him far away enough. I felt the magic in the air boil. That's the best way I can describe this syrup-like pressure sticking to me when the ponies turned. Whenever somebody cast a spell, I'd feel as a ripple. It was only supposed to be a temporary side-effect, my ass. I heard the pop before I saw it and there he was, Shining Armor. The first time this happened, I'd thought he was trying to help me. He wasn't as loopy as the others but yeah, I was wrong. When these episodes occur, normal ponies don't remember me passing by and they certainly don't remember the ponies chasing after me. It's a normal night in Canterlot for everyone except me. “Let me enjoy my last cigarette.” I held up a free hand as a sign of surrender while taking one more puff before putting out the light between my fingers. I was tired anyway. The unicorn's horn grew bright as he walked, approaching my shaking ass before he teleported us away. Fuck. Morning rose not soon enough, the sound of Shining's snoring was getting unbearable and I was getting sick and tired of the horn dragging up and down my neck with every inhale. And I couldn't help but smell his musk coat, reeking of metal and musk. Of dirt and some other fluffy smell I couldn't make out. His hoof dragged along my side and I shuddered, begging for someone to put it me out of my misery. Here I was trapped under a heavy jerk-off horse, cuddling me like a teddy while waiting for my chance to escape. His head moved to my hair, taking a sleepy nip of it. I cringed, calling every deity that I could name to take him off me. There was a sound of door opening before I saw a maid walk in. She dropped her towels with a scandalized gasp and apparently that was all that was needed to walk Shining up. He sat up, smashing his hindquarters into my stomach as he looked at her and more importantly glared at me. There was a question in his eye, a growl in his throat. I gave him the cockiest smile that I could manage. “It's not my fault, you're a cuddle-slut.”