Chapter Two
I started to hyperventilate. My whole life... stuck with Pinkie Pie??? I flopped down onto my haunches. This... this is not good. I can hardly stand a minute with the bright pony. Her color alone leaves me with an impending annoyance. I should have figured the pony would work here though. She seemed to have some sort of unnatural addiction to sugar. I broke out of my haze and decided to go and meet the managers of the establishment, Mr. and Mrs. Cake.
I trotted back behind the desk and into the kitchen to find a frantic Mr. and Mrs. Cake taking care of an even more frantic pair of foals.
"Uhm, if you could just come back in a minute, dearie, we're a bit tied up at the moment!" yelled Mrs. Cake.
"Oh, of course, I kind of wanted to explore the town anyways," I returned.
"I could take you to see the town! Oh I know everypony and everypony knows me and soon everypony will know you! Well as soon as we throw your party, it's gonna be a great party by the way, there'll be cake and streamers and cupcakes and streamers and cake and candy!" Pinkie yelled, all in one breath.
"If you don't mind, Pinkie," I said, taking a step back, "I think I can figure out how to get around the town by myself."
"Oh..." the pink earth pony squeaked, looking very disappointed. Her mane even seemed to be less poofy.
"Uuuuuuugh. I suppose I could let you show me ar-" Pinkie Pie was already all over it.
"OH OH OH OH! I'll show you the park and the Everfree and Carousel Boutique and the library and Sweet Apple Acres and Schoolhouse and the City Hall and the fountain and Sugarcube Corner! Oh wait, we're in Sugarcube Corner... OH WELL! Sugarcube Corner is so great who wouldn't want to see it more than once? Well I suppose you'll be seeing it every day! You're going to live here, after all! Oh my gosh it's going to be so great! We're going to have pie and ice cream and other..."
So my trip, my incredibly long and annoying trip, around Ponyville is supposed to take the whole day, according to Pinkie. First she took me to the Library to meet her friend Twilight Sparkle. Then she took me to Sweet Apple Acres to meet one farm pony named Applejack. After that, she took me to meet Rarity, a dress maker in Carousel Boutique. Following THAT, we went to meet Fluttershy on the edge of the Everfree. That visit was an eventful one...
***
Pinkie Pie slammed on the door of the Library and then prompted me to hide in a nearby bush. A lavender pony with a six-point star cutie mark opened the door.
"Hello? Is anypony there?" and all of the sudden, Pinkie Pie pops up behind her. I laughed a bit until I remembered that it was really annoying when she did that to me.
"AAAH! Pinkie! I told you not to do that!" the lavender unicorn shouted.
"Twilight, this is Charmie, he's new to Ponyville! I'm gonna throw him a huge party! Charmie, this is Twilight Sparkle!" Pinkie said. Apparently we couldn't introduce ourselves.
"Pinkie, I'm sure I'm capable of introducing myself to this mare," I turned to Twilight, "I'm Charm Bracer, I just moved here from Manehatten."
"It's very nice to meet you, Charm Bracer, but I really must get back to my studies."
"Of course, it was great meeting you, as well." The door to the Library closed as Pinkie and I turned to head to Sweet Apple Acres. With her bouncing her way over to the farm all the way on the other side of town, I had to keep at a quick trot to keep up. I was out of breath by the time we'd reached the farm.
"Applejack! Oh AJ!" Pinkie called. An orange earth pony cantered up to us wearing a cowmare hat and a basket of apples on her back. Her flank showed three red apples, much like the three balloons that Pinkie sported.
"Pinkie, y'all know Ah'm always willin' to come and visit ya when Ah got the time, but Ah'm afraid Ah'm a mite busy at the second," said this yellow pony named Applejack. It was at this point that I'd decided to let Pinkie do the introductions for me.
"AJ, this is Charmie! He just moved here from Manehatten," Pinkie said.
"Well Ah'm mighty happy to make yer aquaintance," Applejack paused for a second, "what's yer real name, sugarcube?"
"Charm Bracer."
"Charm Bracer, what a nice name!"
"I could say the same about yours, Applejack," I said. Applejack gave me a funny look.
"Are ya'll tryin' to put yer moves on me?" she asked. Oh dear Celestia... Why does everypony always think that, other than Twilight of course.
"No! I was just saying!" I sighed in my defense. This was why I hated my cutie mark. Always I was "trying to hit on someone".
"Well, if'n yer wantin' to, please don't," she replied. Pinkie and I turned just as Applejack did. We headed off to meet this "Rarity". She sounded pretty snobby to me, but I decided to roll with it. We walked - well, I walked, Pinkie bounced - back to town and to a circus-tent type building. Pinkie pounded on the door just like she had with the Library. A unicorn with a stunning white coat and expertly styled mane opened the door.
"Welcome to Carousel Boutique, where every garment is chic, unique, and magnifique!" shouted the unicorn. She took a look and me and started to giggle maniacally as she pulled me into the boutique with her magic. I mouthed "help" to Pinkie, but she giggled and snorted and walked in with this "Rarity" and I.
"Darling stranger, I have the perfect suit to match your coat! Oh it's simply divine!" Oh sweet Celestia, Luna, any princess help me...
"Actually, Rarity, I wanted to introduce you to Charmie! He's new in Ponyville!"
"And now he'll have a perfect suit for his "Welcome to Ponyville" party!"
"Uh, yeah. No. I don't need a suit or a party, thank you very much," I said sourly. Both ponies looked rather downtrodden, but Rarity's bottom lip had a certain pout to it that made me want to die with guilt.
"Fine. I'll take the suit I can't afford. But NO. PARTY. PINKIE. Seriously," I said to both of the ponies.
"Oh relax, darling. The suit is free and Pinkie's parties are simply marvellous!" Rarity said in an attempt to convince me to go to the party, "besides, I'll be there."
The last sentence she said made me feel rather uncomfortable. Had I accidentally charmed this one, as well? I didn't even say anything charming!
"Come on, Charmie! Let's go meet Fluttershy!" yelled Pinkie, much to my approval. I'd much rather go near the most dangerous forest in all Equestria than go through more of Rarity's fitting. As much as Rarity wailed and pleaded for me to stay and let her finish the suit right now, I wanted to go meet this "Fluttershy". She sounded more my speed, what with the "shy" in her name.
Fluttershy's cottage wasn't quite as far out of town as Sweet Apple Acres, but it was still far enough to make my legs ache. It seemed that Pinkie had almost a heat sink of my energy, stealing the excess and making it her own. She's been bouncing nonstop for almost three hours now.
***
"I think you're really gonna like Fluttershy! She won't think you're hitting on her at all!" Pinkie said with a giggle.
"Perfect. Exactly what I'm looking for in a mare," I said with a face-hoof and an eye roll. Fluttershy's cabin was a really beautiful structure, almost resembling a tree. All of the animals scattered at the sight of Pinkie though. Clearly she wasn't popular among the creatures. More slamming on the door, more screaming of names, but less of the door being answered.
"Fluttershy! I have someone I want you to meet!" Pinkie shouted.
"Oh, um, no thank you, Pinkie... I think I have enough friends if that's ok..." said a voice from beyond the door. Pinkie held up a hoof at me, signaling "give me a second". and went around the back of the cabin. In a few seconds, there was a shriek, a cackle, a chicken, and a door slowly opening to reveal a soft yellow pegasus with beautiful pink hair. It was now that my brain decided to stop working.
"Hah badah badah? Budafaka?" I stammered. This was the first time a mare had ever had this effect on me. It made me feel very dumb.
"What... is... your... name...?" I managed to flub out.
"My name's Flutte..." she drawled out.
"Her name's Fluttershy! She's kind of shy!" Pinkie said in a stage whisper. I face-hoofed yet again. Fluttershy retreated into her cabin and Pinkie and I decided to go back to Sugarcube Corner. As soon as Fluttershy's cabin door closed, Pinkie turned to me with a giant grin.
"Somepony likes another somepony," she said.
"I do not!" I retorted. Ok. I was totally lying, but it was so obvious Fluttershy wasn't interested anyways. I practically gave up instantly on her. Some ponies just can't be charmed. Sometimes though, I wish nopony could.