//------------------------------// // ROAD TRIP! I... uh... mean, rail trip // Story: The strange life of a human in Equestria // by The Batmane of equestria //------------------------------// The fol- "SHUT UP, DUDE!" you and Pinkie both shout to the befuddlement of the others in the room. "Rainbow Dash, fork in wing (yeah, she's using her wings to hold her fork. What? They're more dextile.), is wearing a confused expression. "What?" she asks, eyebrows raised. "It's the narrator." you and Pinkie both explain. "Riiiiight." Celestia stands up to address the room, causing you to bow down in respect. "What is thy bidding, my master." you say in a deep voice, causing everypony in the room to stare at you, barring Pinkie, who was laughing as if she understood the reference. Luna suddenly smirks a little and says "arise, Lord Vader." in a near perfect impression of the Emperor. You almost squee in delight, and you would have if you had that vocal range. Celestia quirks her brow before speaking, "That is enough Luna. Anyway, I would like to welcome you to Equestria mister..." She trailed off, signifying that you should continue. "Anon, Princess Celestia." You respond from your kneeling position. Celestia barely contains a smirk at that. "Really? That's your name? Are you absolutely certain that it's not short for anonymous?" She says knowingly. "Well, I'm not exactly keen on revealing my real name to anypony here, and I'd much rather start a new identity here than continue with my old one, so until I have a befitting name that would allow me to fit in, per se." You respond, making the Princess look at you in shock. "Considering your previous behaviour, I had no idea you were able to talk so... intelligently." She says carefully. "I shall take that as a compli-sult!" You say, randomly taking a heroic pose. "Wait, that's already in someone else's fanfics, isn't it? Is it trademarked? I don't know, but I ain't taking the risk." you continue. "Right then." Celestia says. "On to the matter at hoof. I would like you to accompany Twilight and her friends to Canterlot in order for us to do research on you and your world." "Okey dokey Loki!" you exclaim. "Hey!" Pinkie exclaims. "That's my line!" You smirk, your eyes showing a hint of mischief. "I know. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA-*cough-cough**cough**hack**cough*" Your faux-evil laugh is cut short by a coughing fit. Pinkie looks to Celestia. "I like this one. Can we keep him? Please?" Celestia, as motherly as ever, says "Of course, Pinkie." Then a sly smile shows up on her face. Not good. NOT GOOD! "So long as you feed him twice a day and clean up after his mess." The whole room is in uproar at this, much to your displeasure. It continues for what seems like hours. Finally, you've had enough. "Okay! That's enough! Now, when can I have my lunch?" The laughter dies down quickly. Twilight then walks you to a seat. Or rather, a red cushion on the floor. You plonk yourself unceremoniously on the cushion in a cross-legged position, the table coming up to your chest. You notice on the crystal table, there is a plate in front of you. A plate of fish and mixed vegetables. This confuses you. "Uh, I thought you were all herbivores?" You say. "We are, but I noticed that your teeth are similar to that of a herbivore and carnivore." Twilight began. "And we don't have meat on demand, so we cooked some fish. Is that okay?" You cut a small bit off the fish and taste it and... "SWEET FAUST THIS IS THE BEST FISH I HAVE EVER TASTED!" You shout, going on to devour the entire dish faster than Pinkie ever could, much to the amazement of said mare. "Alright! Now let's get going to Canterlot!" You yell. Everyone slowly gets out of their seats and, with the mane six leading, you head to the station. Celestia and Luna simply took their respective chariots. You pass through the town, receiving odd stares from the inhabitants. You should probably get used to that for the next few months. You did recognise a few of these ponies as background characters. You arrive at the station only minutes after leaving the castle, and stand on the platform, towering above the others. As soon as you arrive, a tooting sound is heard coming from your right, signalling the approaching train. You turn to look at the train as it arrives, waiting for it to stop so you can go inside, doing so in a tense silence, mostly because, well, what do you say to a strange and comical creature from another world? You all board in silence. You sit there, on the train, staring out of the window at the distant city as the others all talk to each other. Not once on the two hour train journey do you talk to anypony, too entranced in your thoughts to do anything, despite being in what some would consider perfect company. You think ahead to Canterlot. Celestia said that she wanted to research me. That could prove problematic, depending on what she wants to know. You should probably tell her what she wants to know. She's an all powerful alicorn who controls the sun and could probably blast you to Cybertron and back without breaking sweat. Not somepony who's bad side you want to get on. Your subconscious says. I know that, but what if I can tell her some false truths? I won't be lying, just withholding information. Yeah, but... actually, that's a good idea. I know. I thought of it. If you're gonna keep coming into my mind, I'm gonna need to give you a name. That's not ne- Yes it is! You are a sentient subconscious capable of thoughts, feelings and creativity. You deserve a name. Fine then. That's up to you. Your subconscious leaves after that, allowing you to concentrate on the scenery as you near Canterlot. An ominous feeling overcomes you as you look at the pristine city, making your hairs stand on end. "This is going to be a fun couple of days, isn't it?" You mutter sarcastically.