//------------------------------// // Likeable Prince vs. Nostalgia's Green Tunic // Story: The Moment No Pony was Waiting For (A Death Battle Parody) // by TundraStanza //------------------------------// Please make sure that your "Formatting" is set to "Dark", not "Light". Thank you. A/N: Not going to lie, I was kind of curious how these two would fare against each other myself. Thanks for the suggestion. Properties in this chapter belong to Hasbro, ScrewAttack, and Nintendo. --- The Moment No Pony was Waiting For Season 3 E 14 For honor and great justice, we ride! Humble knights take many forms. They often serve to protect the helpless princesses in distress. But when they're not beating the crap out of giant monsters, they're busy with the more mundane tasks like gardening, delivering items, and... coaching competitors for the Olympics. Link the Hero of Hyrule! And Shining Armor, Princess Cadance's b****. He means Prince and Royal Captain. That's what I said. He's W and I'm B. And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. ---Death Battle--- Link -Hero of Hyrule; blessed with the Triforce of Courage -Puzzle solver, swordsman, birdrider, train conductor, bug collector, all-around errand boy -Wields the Master Sword and the Hylian Shield -Carries several bombs, a bow, arrows, a boomerang, a hookshot, the Iron Boots, Pegasus Boots w/ Roc Feather -Wears the golden gauntlets, red ring of defense, and green garments -Aims for the weak points -Battle strategy is not his strongest aspect "Hup! Come on!" Here, we have the character that confused everyone playing Legend of Zelda games for the first time. Contrary to the rookie assumption that his name is Zelda, this fairy-elf boy is actually called Link. How many times must I tell you that he's not a fairy?! Well, whatever he is, he's constantly changing his backstory and skill set with every reincarnation. Is he a farmer, a forest dweller, some long lost brother of the princess, a time traveller, or an island sailor? The answer is an astounding all of the above. Each of the heroes named Link are all connected by their common Triforce of Courage, giving him the experience of over ten generations of adventuring experience. Somehow, that experience also translated into how much stuff can fit into his pockets. He carries three pairs of boots, a ton of bombs, arrows, a bow, three different hookshots, and the Gale Boomerang: a tool for sending wind into fans and whipping goodies and enemies in those hard to reach spots. Among his various items, Link always picks up the Master Sword, nicknamed "Evil's Bane" for its inherent ability to... well, kill evil things. ... like spiders, a rare male Gerudo, and the deadliest enemy of all... pots! Aside from ways to destroy artistic vases, Link also wears a number of defensive items such as the Red Ring, the Golden Gauntlets, and the Hylian Shield capable of withstanding any and all attacks. When he's fighting giant beasts and enemies, he usually has to find one specific weak point and beat it until the enemy stops wiggling around. But while he has the means to do so, he doesn't always think ahead with exactly the right weapon. But hey, he's tough enough to withstand one or two slip-ups. Link is a master swordsman, puzzle solver, bird rider, and train conductor. Seriously, a train conductor? What's next, a dynasty warrior? Well, actually... Wow... just... wow. Link shows off his mastery of the Hero Shade's latest technique before spinning and sheathing his sword. ---Death Battle--- Shining Armor -Older sibling to Twilight Sparkle -Rose through the ranks to Captain of the Royal Guard; married Princess Cadance; Prince of the Crystal Empire -Highest level of defensive magic shown to date -Held a city-wide shield for at least two days without proper sleep and while being drained of love energy by a changeling queen -Has a magical beam for offense -Is strong enough to throw Cadance several yards -Has no special defense against magic stealers "This, you need to see." Shining Armor is the Prince of the Crystal Empire and Captain of Equestria's Royal Guard. He married the Princess of Love and soon later to be defined Crystal Princess. Not to mention, he's the older brother of the Element of Magic who later transcended to become the Princess of Friendship. I suspect government interference somewhere in the mix. Come on, that's not nearly as ridiculous as some of the stuff that fairy tales have come up with in the past. Well, I guess rising through the ranks of Royal Guard can't be that easy. I mean, more than half of the unicorns in said guard can't conjure up a magic barrier even close to the scale that this boy pony toy can. Though, they might be able to blast magic beams just as strong as his. Shining Armor has one of the strongest shield spells in Friendship is Magic history. When he was introduced to the series, he was holding up a city-encompassing barrier for at least two days without getting a full night's rest. Keep in mind, he was also getting drained of love energy by the changeling queen on multiple occasions during this time frame. And we ran the numbers to figure out why the strongest sword ever couldn't break his shield if he so chose to concentrate that same spell around just himself. He doesn't just have strong magic. His upper body strength is enough to lift and toss Princess Cadance like a speeding javelin. How did he not get in a fight with her over that later? Well, considering her wings opened a few seconds before he threw her, my guess is that it was mostly her plan at the last minute. Man, if only I could have done that to my ex-wife. Unfortunately for Shining Armor's reputation, there have been three villains within the second, third, and fourth seasons that have somehow blocked or stolen his magical energy. I mean, who's actually comfortable with getting sexually violated that many times? *ahem* But considering that these were power houses that required the magic of love and friendship to defeat, it says something about how much it really takes to keep Shining Armor down. A writer for a little kids' show with a vendetta against its male cast. *sigh* Fair point. "Let's move, move, move!" ---Death Battle--- All right, the combatants are set. Let's settle this debate once and for all. It's time for a Death Battle! ---Death Battle--- The following takes place after Zelda vs. Cadance. A stallion gallops along the sunset-lit bridge. The beaten and battered body of his beloved sleeps right in the middle. He gasps, cries, and begs upon Celestia for it to not be true. The culprit will pay. They will pay dearly for raising their bow to her. He notices the exhausted creature wielding the murder weapon. Enraged, he gallops forth and throws his weight into a mighty buck. Zelda screams as she flies off the arena to the "death boundary". A man hears the cry of his princess. He observes her death upon collision with the exterior of the screen. Is it Ganondorf again? The man runs forward. What he sees is not Ganondorf, but an awfully bright stallion whinnying furiously. This cannot go on. The man pulls out his sword and holds his shield at the ready in his other hand. "FIGHT!" In a strange split-second decision, Link sheathes his sword again. He runs forth and attempts to mount the angry pony. Though, his feet touch the ground even as he sits on the stallion's back. An awkward silence passes after two seconds before Shining Armor simply rolls over. This forces the man to hop off before he gets crushed. Shining delivers a one-two punch with his front hooves. They collide with the Hylian Shield, forcing Link to slide back a couple of inches. The unicorn follows up by turning around and bucking. But again, the decorative shield seems to withstand the force. Link pulls out his sword and spins around in place. This forces Shining to jump out of the way. The Hero of Hyrule pulls out his bow and fires a volley of arrows. At the same time, the prince's horn lights up and a pink bubble of light surrounds him. The arrows bounce away harmlessly. Link's next two arrows carry a bluish tint. They create a layer of ice that curves around Shining Armor's spell. However, this doesn't do anything else. A flick through his inventory attaches one of Link's bombs to his next arrow. The explosion creates a cloud of smoke and scatters the ice all over the place. But as the smoke clears, Shining Armor's barrier looks none the worse for wear. It only drops briefly as Shining switches spells and fires a beam from his horn. Link's shield holds off the gist of the blast, though his feet slide along the bridge. Seeing an opening, Link tosses his boomerang. But at this distance, Shining has enough time to put up his translucent barrier again. For once, the boomerang does not return to Link's hand. Trying once more for range, Link launches his hookshot. The metal claw taps against the outside of the barrier. It quickly shortens and pulls Link close. Within striking distance of the barrier, Link firmly grasps the Master Sword and slashes this way and that. He performs another impression of a top and even throws in his finishing downward strike. Still, the pink barrier holds. The swordsman grunts. A burst of yellow seems to course through his entire being. Link charges forth again with all the force he can muster. A double-layer of the Triforce manifests in light as he rapidly strikes every diagonal direction conceivable from this side of the barrier. Yet despite all of the rippling, the barrier doesn't budge. Link can't believe that his Triforce Slash didn't work. A crack suddenly appears in the bricks beneath his feet. An exclamation point briefly flashes above his head after he chances a look down. The crack spreads farther and farther. Shining Armor gasps as he notices the cracks in the bridge are reaching him too. The high ground caves beneath the combatants. The startled pony's spell is interrupted by his sudden weightlessness. Two different pitches of yells are heard as gravity claims them for itself. "Double K.O.!" ---Death Battle--- Wait, how does that work? We're letting the bridge be the death of them both? Well, look at their defensive capabilities and look at what they've got for offense. Shining Armor has plenty of strength and magic, but no clear finishers that could pierce the Hylian Shield. Link has a wide variety of different weapons, but even the Golden Gauntlets wouldn't let the Master Sword pierce one of Shining Armor's magic barriers. I guess. Out of all of Link's tools of murder, the Master Sword is the strongest in his arsenal, but it doesn't come close to the force of impact that Jack the Ripper Raiden could strike with... and Raiden lost against Shining Armor. Plus, Shining Armor's only notable defeats in canon were against villains that could steal or block his magic by affecting his horn. Link has no common means of stealing magic and in order to strike Shining Armor's horn, he'd have to get through that barrier spell first. All of that force from their battle was enough to put strain in the very platform that they were fighting on. Sorry, boys. Have a nice fall! This Death Battle is a draw. ---Death Battle--- Next time on Death Battle... "Spider-Man! I mean, Deadpool. *Ess*!" ---