//------------------------------// // A hop and a skip and a... talking horse? // Story: Gong Yi Tem Ponies // by TrombonePlayingPony //------------------------------// You ever have one of those days where you remember something that you used to love but for some reason you fell out of it? In most cases, someone will see something to remind them of their old fad, either some merch or a google search gone wrong. Heck, you might have just thought of it out of the blue, the victim of a wandering mind. And again, in most cases the person will either forget about it again or dig up their old favorites and relive the memories they bring. Sharing it with your friends is something that is pretty common as well. Ya, the more I explain this the further my case seems to not be like most. It was a subnormal day for me. I was at a convention with some friends, all who wanted to go see the actor’s panel at 1:30 when I really wasn’t interested. It wasn’t that I hated the actors, I’m just not big on learning the behind the scenes stuff. I certainly respect them for their work though since without them I wouldn’t have the stuff to enjoy. Where was I?... Oh, right. Now I remember. I told my friends they could head to the panel without me and that I would check out the merch booths. So we split up and I made my way there, all the while doing my best to avoid crowds. Ya, not a fan of those. I didn’t have crippling claustrophobia but enough to make me feel on edge if things got too close. Thankfully being an old pro at the game of avoidance helped me make it to the booths without breaking a sweat, and helped even more inside since the place was even more packed than the rest of the convention center. I started glancing over stands, only stopping my constant walk when I found something I would actually bother buying. Cheap trinkets and things that you put on shelves and forget about made up what wasn’t commemorative T-shirts and hats, the kind I would only wear to this kind of convention. I was about to give up on finding something really interesting for my tastes when something drew me in from the corner of my eye. Off against the wall was a booth filled with a variety of things from practically anything you could think off. From Portal to Skyrim, Marvel to DC. Heck, there was even a few weapons I recognized from various anime I had watched. The man at the booth was talking with another customer about some item so I walked up without interrupting. I scanned over the practical treasure trove until my eyes locked on to some kind of metal tube with handles on the sides. This seems familiar. I pondered as I looked at the object with a puzzled expression. Agh! This is going to bother me all day if I don’t figure out what this is. “Interested, are we?” I jumped up to see the man who owned the booth now right in front of me. A quick look around confirmed the previous customer had left without making a sound. Strange. Even with the noise in this place I thought I would at least hear a goodbye or something. I cleared my throat before addressing the man in front of me. “Actually I was just trying to figure out what it is. It looks familiar.” The man cackled dryly before responding. “Ah, the human memory is a fickle thing it is. If it would help jog your memory, you are free to open it.” Open it? A quick check confirmed there was a small seam along the center of it, eluding that whatever it was could be opened by pulling on it’s handles. Well, he said it was alright. Plus, the sooner I figure this out the sooner I can leave. This dude is giving me the creeps! I reached down and grabbed the handles, giving each a gentle tug to find on the inside was a scroll. In the center of it was a blue circle surrounded by an ornamental-looking black border. Some sort of asian characters were written to either side and my hispanic heritage wasn’t exactly helping in translation. Dios mio this is bugging me. It’s on the tip of my tongue… “Ay! Now I remember!” I quickly realized how loud I had just spoken before slapping a hand over my mouth. Thankfully only the stand owner seemed to notice. “So what is it?” “Huh? Oh, right. This is from that… what was the name of it… Xiaolin Showdown. This was the scroll they used for information on the… magical… whatever’s they were hunting.” That was a really good show, but I haven’t seen it since I was a niño. Mental note: To the internet! “Yes, those magical whatevers were called the Shen Gong Wu. I’m glad you remembered.” I smiled sheepishly before pushing the scroll halves back together. “Well thanks for letting me look it over.” I turned to walk away but man’s voice seemed to cut through the ambient noise despite him speaking barely above muttering. “Are you not interested in having this scroll? I’m sure we can come up with a deal.” Great, friendly stand owner is showing his true colors now. I faced him and made sure to still be polite despite my less than sunny disposition about some creepy guy trying to convince me to buy what might very well be a piece of junk. “Sorry, but I’m sure there’s no way I could pay for something as well made as that.” I mean, something like that has to go for at least a hundred on looks alone. The man cackled again before giving me a grin I couldn’t discern was kind or greedy. “Pay? Who said anything about paying? I want to give you this scroll.” Wait, what? “But… why?” He’d be losing so much money giving me such a thing. “Let’s just say you weren’t the only one reminded of a past favorite. I’ll even throw in this,” he held up what looked like a ruby shaped conically and given spikes along the base “just because I’m feeling extra nice today.” He’s giving me two? For free?! I was dumbfounded to the point that accepting the old man’s kindness felt like the only thing I could really do. He handed me the scroll first, allowing me to throw the attached strap over my shoulder before giving me the ruby. As I gazed at the red gem, some light reflected off its surface and hit me square in the eyes. I tried to clear my vision by blinking but something ran right into me. Ground, meet face. Face, meet… grass? I pushed myself off the ground to see that the taste in my mouth was definitely grass. Even ignoring the fact that I should have fallen into the merch stand, the floor of the convention center had been rough carpet. Of course, then I looked up. I was now in front of a large oak tree… with a door. And windows. And a balcony with a telescope. Okay, so a tree building. Sounds like something Disney cooked up. There was also a sign next to it with the image of a book and the words “Golden Oaks Library” printed on it. A library in a tree? Well, I guess that’s poetic in a way. Bring the paper back to where it originated. Next thing I noticed was my clothes felt a lot lighter than they were before. A quick check showed I was wearing what looked like… robes? I wasn’t really sure what else to call them. Long sleeved, light yet soft material, primarily red shirt with black lining and white pants. I would have been rather comfortable had it actually been what I was wearing ten seconds ago. “Tw-tw-twilight? What is that?” “I don’t know Spike, but be careful.” “Oh dear. I-I’ve n-n-never seen a creature l-like that.” Upon hearing voices behind me I thought: Perfecto! Maybe I can ask these people about how I ended up wearing robes in Disneyland. Probably got drugged or some other excuse that actually makes sense! Than all that went out the window, grew legs, and decided to go for a nice jog when I turned and was faced with a purple unicorn giving me the stink eye while a purple and green gecko and a yellow pegasus shivered behind it. That’s about where I froze as my brain tried in vain to process all this nonsense at once. Not sure how long I spent staring at the thing that should not exist but it clearing its throat- What?! The tiny horned caballo just cleared its throat!- snapped me out of my daze at least for a brief second. “Excuse me? Are you… sentient?” The purple unicorn just asked me if I was sentient! That thought and a muttered “Dios mio” was all I could manage before I fainted. *     *     * Meanwhile, in another part of this magical land known as Equestria… “Oh they won’t know what hit them Flam!” Flim and Flam, the technological geniuses, were hard at work in what they called their “secret lair”, though the noise from the rave happening upstairs didn’t exactly allude to it being anymore than a basement with a lot of machine parts and other technology lying around. “Indeed, brother of mine. Once we show them our newest fantastic creation, we’ll have the funding for our real project. And then-” “world domination-” “will be ours!” Both chuckled in a manner only they would call maniacal before they were interrupted as the vibrations from upstairs finally managed to cause a shelf full of parts to fall over, turning the duo’s laugh into a joint grumble. Flim picked up the shelf in his magic. “I can’t believe we couldn’t find a better place than this though. The noise from that mare with the sunglasses is going to make getting any work done a nightmare.” Flam had already begun sorting through the spilled parts and putting them in their proper places. “Not to mention getting any sleep. We’ll have to make sure we save something special for her once we rule this miserable planet!” “Oh I can already think of a few- hey, what is this?” Flim levitated an engraved wooden box for his brother to see. “Why that seems like one of those old puzzle boxes grandma used to send us. Wonder how it got in this pile of parts.” They both pondered it for but a moment before reshelving the rest of their parts and placing the box on the table in the center of the room. “Shall we try to open it Flam?” “Indeed we shall Flim! Why, what sort of geniuses would we be if we left this box sealed?” “We wouldn’t be geniuses. We would be just like all those simpletons upstairs.” And with that the brothers spent the next few minutes deciphering the puzzle box. It turned out to be incredibly simple for the two inventors to crack and they were soon welcomed with their prize of… “A mask? What a waste of time.” “Indeed. Perhaps we should throw it to those troublemakers, see how many heads it skips across.” “Nah, let’s just throw it away. Doubt it will make it that far anyway.” Flam tossed the box over his shoulder, landing squarely in a metal trash bin. “Now, back to our plans to take over the world.” Little did the brothers know that as they looked over the map they had pinned up on the wall, the “mask” was slowly floating out of the bin. Purple, ghostly tendrils wove their way out the back, forming a wispy body and something resembling arms. “Any idea where we should start our takeover?” “Perhaps the griffon kingdoms to the north. Defeating them would send a big message.” “But is that too close to Equestria? After all, we should save Princess Celestia for last. Manipulating the sun and moon is something even our brilliant minds will have trouble figuring out. How about the cat kingdom of Mewgypt?” “That is possible, though there are many directions from which we could be counterattacked there. Plus that place is just all sand and sun. The minotaur lands of Austrawlia?” “Possibly. Easy to defend from sea and air. From there we can fortify our position, move north to Chanda, Korear-” “Than onward to Rushon!” A hissing voice spoke as the mask came through the map. The brothers took this ghost’s emergence with about as much grace as they have. Which is to say none at all. “Ah! Cider drones, attack the freaky ghost thing!” Suddenly a stack of cider barrels set up against the wall unfolded to reveal machines beneath the wooden exterior. Each barrel floated into the air on a jet, a magic powered cannon swiveling to their front. The drones fired, scorching the map behind the ghost but leaving it unharmed. Once the light show had died down, the mask chuckled before slowly floating over to the two brothers who were now cowering under the table. “I see you are planning to take over the world. Seems we have something in common.” Flam lifted a hoof from his face just enough to see. “W-w-who are you?” “Me? The name’s Wuya. I just became your new best friend.” She then broke out in evil laughter that only grew with time. The brothers, not sure what to do, joined in the laughter half-heartedly.