“Oh Trixie, you are so great and powerful to me!” You take Trixie’s hooves in your hands and look into her bright, quavering eyes. “I know we’ve only just met, but I’ve written so much fan fiction about you that it seems like we have known each other forever!”
“That’s amazing!” Trixie gasps, her mouth hanging open. “Trixie writes fan fiction about herself too! This is indeed a perfect match!”
You lean forwards to kiss her hoof. It tastes of mud. You don’t mind though. “Trixie,” you ask solemnly. “Will you do me the honour of marrying me?”
“Only if you tell Trixie how wonderful Trixie is!” Trixie smiles with glee, and wraps her hooves around your neck. You both tumble backwards onto a pile of pinecones. They are agonisingly prickly, but you have Trixie, you don’t care.
You spend the rest of your days living with Trixie in the Everfree Forest. By day you regale her with stories about herself, and by night you feast on pinecones. It is a tough life, and your bowel movements are hell, but you know you are no longer alone.
(Unless you are Sethisto in which case, EXCELLENT END)
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