My Little Haiku

by q97randomguy


Bad Characters Last

Nightmare Moon’s mane flows
With power, wrecking landscapes
But forging friendships.
 
Gilda yelled a lot.
Then she roared at Fluttershy.
Unacceptable!
 
Nameless red dragon,
You must be so very tired.
Sleep for a century.
 
Blueblood is a prick.
Don’t let his big horn fool you.
His horn is quite small.

Flim and Flam are twins.
Wait, which one is which, again?
Eh, who really cares?
 
Trixie really is
The best unicorn ever!
Where’s my money, Seth?
 
Diamond Tiara
Lacks characterization
But has jewelry.
 
Silver Spoon seems weak
Influenced by those with power
Must be little spoon.
 
Diamond Dogs’ ears are
Very sensitive things! Stop
Whining, miss pony!
 
Dragons were mean jerks
Who would eat a phoenix’s eggs.
Wonder how that works…
 
Om nom! Spit! One more.
Repeat till Ponyville is
All chewed up and gone.
 
Half dragon half bird
The cockatrice is
Scary with its red—
 
Cadence isn’t nice.
She was bridezilla all day.
Oh, hi, Chrysalis.
 
King Sombra wanted
Slaves, crystals, and more vocab.
He got none of them.
 
Tirek: final boss
Ended up a shriveled husk
Back where he belongs.
 
Lightning Dust foils Dash
And not with aluminum.
She’s less scrupulous.
 
My, these rules are quite silly.
Where’s the fun in just
Five-seven-five? Discord instead!