A/N: Well, this ought to be interesting. I wasn't too sure about doing battle royales or team battles. But I guess they were bound to happen eventually. I'm afraid some ideas may be left out since it's been nearly forever since I last watched Nightmare Before Christmas. All right here we go.
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Properties belong to Hasbro, Screw Attack, Square Enix, and Disney.
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The Moment No Pony was Waiting For (9)
---Death Battle---
Woah, nelly! I think the director has finally bitten off more than he can chew. Oh, well. Not my problem. I'm just a figure of his imagination. Take it away, B and W!
Pictures of random children start bombarding the screen.
B opens, "Child labor is a terrible thing, but making them fight each other to the death makes everything better."
W does his own opening, "Today, we're taking two groups of young competitors to see who's teamwork stands superior."
"The Halloween pranksters: Lock, Shock, and Barrel."
"And the Cutie Mark Crusaders: Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo."
"He's W and I'm B."
"And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle."
---Death Battle---
Rub a dub, dub. The screen shows three imps in a tub.
"As part-time assistants to Oogie Boogie," starts W, "You can guarantee that Lock, Shock, and Barrel are up to mischief."
"They take pranking WAY beyond eggs and T.P," comments B.
"The trio can usually be found in Halloween Town, although they have been known to invade Christmas Town where they kidnapped Santa Claus."
"Heh, yeah. It takes really skilled professionals to nab a fat guy." B's sarcasm goes unnoticed, as usual. Various stat screens appear as W keeps talking.
"The devil-costumed Lock is considered the leader of the group despite his lower intelligence. His attack of choice is the pumpkin bomb which can explode upon impact or be delayed for a timed explosion. Melee combat is not his strong-suit."
"The witch-costumed Shock is considered the most intelligent of the group and often complains about her friends' stupidity. But her only real attack is a spinning charge, which any sensible Keyblade wielder can counter just by blocking."
"The skeleton-costumed Barrel is deemed Oogie's 'star pupil', though he tends to be the slowest of the group. His attack is a rolling charge which can trip unguarded enemies, leaving them vulnerable to Lock's pumpkin bombs."
"Speaking of those pumpkin bombs, all three of them are weak against the explosions."
"Should their situation get too dangerous, the trio will quickly run for cover requiring someone else to take care of their dirty work."
"If these three are a company, I don't want to see a crowd."
A clip of Lock, Shock, and Barrel shows them saying, "Trick or Treat!" at Santa's doorstop.
---Death Battle---
A yellow earth pony filly with a ribbon, a white unicorn filly, and an orange Pegasus filly wearing a helmet all take up the screen after the title card splits.
"Aw, they're so cute," says B, "Wait, I mean where's my gun? I need to shoot something."
"Pledged to find out what their special talents are and figure out who they are, Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo form the Cutie Mark Crusaders," says W, "Each has a cape made from golden silk underlinings which symbolize their crusade."
"They were supposed to be a secret organization, but then they go shouting their name wherever they go."
"CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS!" confirms a clip of their audio. Stat screens appear as W begins further details.
"Although they constantly go on various adventures to discover their place in the world, outside observers can easily identify what each is best at. Apple Bloom is a designer and architect. Sweetie Belle's singing is considered the best voice in Equestria. Scootaloo is an avid scooter trick pro and dance step expert."
"But in their group performance, they all chose the wrong tasks. It led to them winning 'best comedy' even though they weren't entered in that category."
"To add insult to injury, Sweetie Belle's magic has yet to surface and Scootaloo's flying strength is mediocre at best.
And although Apple Bloom isn't afraid to speak her mind, she sometimes lies to get out of jams."
"Hey, W!"
"What?"
"DEATH BATTLE DUO ANNOUNCERS!"
"...No."
"Aww."
The last clip before the title card shows the Crusaders together saying, "Whatever we do, we'll do it together as... the CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS!" before bumping hooves.
---Death Battle---
As with any Death Battle, W declares, "All right, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all."
B says, "But first, I'm going to collect my dues from Gamefly."
"But B, I already collected them."
"Netflix?"
"Got them."
"Square Space?"
"Yes."
"Campaign against drunk driving?"
"Already got those too."
"Oh... well in that case, it's time for a team Death Battle!"
---Death Battle---
The background appears to be a fairly open graveyard with a couple dying trees on either side of the screen. A living bathtub walks in from the right carrying the mischief-makers of Halloween Town.
"What's that?" Barrel asks while pointing to the left of the screen. As Lock and Shock take a look, a low buzzing noise is heard as three fillies come in riding on a blue scooter and a red wagon. They come to a braking halt.
"Well," huffs Scootaloo, "if those aren't faces only mothers could love."
"Scootaloo! Don't be mean," criticizes Sweetie Belle.
"FIGHT!"
"Hey, Lock!" Shock calls before whispering something in his ear. The little red devil chuckles before tossing a pumpkin at the fillies.
"Augh!" the two fillies in the wagon scream as they jump out. The Pegasus filly somehow drives her scooter away having detached from the wagon off screen. The pumpkin explodes upon contact with the wagon. The resulting boom sends the wagon flying into the distance.
"What was that for?" yells an angry Apple Bloom.
"Bombs away!" shouts the opposing trio. Lock throws a barrage of delayed pumpkin bombs as well as an instant one that almost catches the unicorn filly by the hind hooves. The Crusaders take cover behind a dead tree as explosions rain all around.
"What do we do now?" asks a worried Sweetie Belle. The farmer pony seems to ponder the question before a mental light bulb flicks on.
"I got it!" Apple Bloom shouts, "Girls! Our comedy routine!"
"Huh?" ask the other two confused fillies. But then it dawns on them. "Oh!"
The imp trio is snickering from the safety of their bathtub. They even take off their masks for two seconds to laugh before putting them back on. The sound of an electronic keyboard interrupts their fits of laughter.
"Where's that music coming from?" asks Lock. The other two don't have an answer. Instead, the answer comes from behind the tree as the orange Pegasus filly appears first. She's followed by her friends.
Look here! Our three little ponies
Ready to sing for this crowd.
Listen up, 'cause here's our story.
I'm going to sing it very LOUD!
Scootaloo's singing voice is so off-key, that the kick*ss electric guitar solo in the background is completely ignored. Lock, Shock, and Barrel cover their ears in agony. Covering his ears throws off Lock's aim as his next pumpkin bomb doesn't come anywhere near the Crusaders. Rather, it explodes upon impact with one of the tree branches. The blast seems to have weakened its hold on the rest of the tree.
"Ergh! Come on, you idiots!" shouts Shock to her allies, "We have to stop that horrible noise." She and Barrel hop out of the tub and charge at the fillies.
They all say that you'll get your mark
When the time is really right
And you know just what you're supposed to do
And your talent comes to light
The awfully bad singing throws off the aims of Shock's spinning charge and Barrel's rolling charge. Scootaloo easily sidesteps out of their way.
But it's not as easy as it sounds
And that waiting's hard to do
So we test our talents everywhere
Until our face is blue.
Meanwhile, Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle are both throwing kicks with the few martial arts moves they know. One of their kicks actually connect with the oncoming Shock and Barrel. It knocks them right back to the tub they were in at the start. Lock is slightly dazed at the re-entry of his partners, still holding a delayed reaction pumpkin bomb in his hand.
We are the Cutie Mark Crusaders
On a quest to find out who we are
And we will never stop the journey
Not until we have out cutie marks!
We are the Cutie Mark Crusaders
On a quest to find out who we are
And we will never stop the journey
Not until we have out cutie MARKS!
As Scootaloo shouts the last word of the Crusaders' song, the weakened branch from earlier finally breaks and falls on top of the three little ponies. The trio in the tub laugh evilly.
"Wait," says Barrel, "How long have you been holding that?" All three look at the bomb currently in Lock's hand. It's yellow counter reads "2... 1... 0."
"You idiot," mutters Shock. The pumpkin explodes and all three are sent flying into the distance. There's even a star twinkle as they leave the camera's view.
Meanwhile, the three fillies manage to wiggle themselves out from underneath the fallen branch. Some light brown, sticky stuff is covering them from head to hoof.
"Every pony okay?" asks Apple Bloom.
"Oh, not again," murmurs Scootaloo, taking notice that she and her friends are covered in tree sap.
"Did we get our 'beat the bad kids' cutie marks?" asks Sweetie Belle hopefully. They each look at their respective flanks. Not surprisingly, they're all still blank save for the splotches of tree sap.
"Aww," all three sigh.
"K.O.!"
---Death Battle---
"Rest in peace headphone users," apologizes B, "Rest in peace." Stats regarding the battle appear onscreen.
"Lock, Shock, and Barrel may have had superior fire power," reflects W, "But their strategy ultimately relies on Lock, who doesn't exactly hold the team's full IQ. As a result, they were unprepared for any form of counterattack. Easily, the Cutie Mark Crusaders caught their opponents off guard with Scootaloo's terrible singing, and the other two's terrible dancing."
"Meh, I guess it beats Rebecca Black's Friday."
"The winners are the Cutie Mark Crusaders." The screen shows picture of the three fillies with bold letters "CMC" underneath.
---Death Battle---
The usual credits play as the show ends for the day.
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A/N: Wow, I saw some pretty cool ideas for future Death Battles in the comments. I'll use some of those. But like I said in the story summary's second edit, I have some things that may prevent regularly updating. That being said, thanks for reading, everybody.
Properties belong to their respective owners. I gain no profit for this. Catch you on the flip side!