//------------------------------//
// Re:Compense 
// Story: Re:Changeling 
// by Robomac 
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Broken: that one word fit the two of us perfectly. That shocking event had a massive effect on both me and Chrysalis. It had only been a few days since her outburst, but it felt like weeks. Every following day she would come into the room and lay down in the corner as far from me as she could while letting herself be buried under her thoughts. Our direct contact was limited to when she would take care of my needs. Not once did I resist her as I have been doing prior the event, and yes, it is true that I did fear sending her into another envious rage, but above that; I could not bring myself to put her into a state of emotional torment like that again.

Every time I looked at her almost permanently dejected expression, I would feel my guilt and shame over my actions. Being panicked, distraught, and angry were no excuse to act like a foal; although, realizing that I was technically a changeling foal did make me smile a little. Any humor I could find was welcome, but it never lasted long. I only had to look at Chrysalis again to take part in her depression. Even with what she's done to me - and before that, my brother - I could no longer hate her. Instead I felt a combination of sympathy and pity.

The sound of hoofsteps approaching interrupted the longstanding silence. Suddenly yet unsurprisingly, Chrysalis stood up from the corner and dropped all signs of the emotions that were trying to crush her; instead putting on a appearance of confidence and dominance. Part of me pitied how she tried so hard to appear strong. The other part wondering where those acting skills were back during the wedding.

A Changeling walked into the room and addressed his queen with a salute. "Your Majesty, I have a report on the injured Caretaker from five days ago."

Chrysalis narrowed her eyes. "Out with it then, Informant!"

"O-of course. She had not recovered fully, but she is well enough to resume working for the hive."

"What of her horn?" she iterjected.

His eyes widened." I-I-I th-they."

"Enough!" she yelled with a stomp. "I get the picture...Go find a suitable Caretaker for my child while I see to Caretaker-1's condition."

"Yes, Your Highness." He stayed there for a moment watching Chrysalis approach me with a fierce expression on his face, then he ran off to follow her order. I ignored him and tried to feign sleep so Chrysalis would hurry up and check on Caretaker's condition, which I was very invested in. She still went through the full set of checks regardless of my feelings before finally leaving.

Thanks to my elation over Caretaker's potential return, it took me a minute to realize that I was actually left alone in the middle of the day. Alone was a very boring thing to be without a single decent book to keep me company. All I had as a replacement were all the equivalents of chew-toys, so I gnawed on a wooden block until I heard hoofsteps coming in.

I looked up at the door and saw who I recognized as an unknown changeling wearing a saddlebag walking into the room. The individual looked around with a quizzical expression for a second before focusing on me. "Well hi there, deary. Why are you all alone in here?!"

Her voice was shrill and unnecessarily loud. 'What the hay! I can't imagine a foal anywhere that could tolerate that kind of voice.' Of course I wasn't a foal, but that didn't make her voice any more pleasant.

"Ooh, I know what's wrong: You're sick."

I looked at her with one eye wide open and another narrowed; my replication of a raised eyebrow. 'Excuse me, but do I look sick?!"

"I have just the thing for you." She spoke in a way that gave me a really bad feeling. Using her magic, she combed through her saddlebag and pulled out a small tube I recognized as a thermometer.

I mentally sighed. 'Let's get this over with.' I opened my mouth as the thermometer approached me, but the device passed me by. It was after a half-second that this fact registered in my mind. 'Uh oh.'

"Now this won't hurt a bit deary."

I didn't care if it would hurt. I didn't want a thermometer shoved up my rectum. I squirmed and writhed in effort to make myself a difficult target, but she simply held me in place with both fore-hooves. I cried out in discomfort when the thermometer was put to use.

During my cries, she suddenly put a hoof over my mouth to muffle the sound. "Now now, deary. It's not that bad."

She was right about it not being bad and I did stop crying...but the two facts were not linked. No, I stopped crying for a whole different reason. 'I can't breath!' Whether she knew it or not, the mare was covering both of my airways. When I tried to move from her hold, she rolled me over and applied more pressure. If that wasn't bad enough, she was looking at a blank wall as if pretending that I or my plight did not exist. This left me with no other choice but to the very thing I recently regretted doing: I bit her hoof.

"Agh!" she gasped out whilst withdrawing her hoof. She then glared at me and snarled. "Why you cheeky little ant!" As quick as a blink, she flicked me with her hoof hard enough to sting my forehead, or my anatomical equivalent at least. Now I was no stranger to minor pain, but that was as an adult. What this mare did was suffocate then strike an infant. I didn't like her. With crying out the window, I did something that I would have never thought of doing as a pony: I hissed.

She glared at me with a curled lip. "Oh we have a feisty one here...we'll have to fix that," she said while lifting her hoof.

"Halt!" Her limb froze mid-swing as we both looked at the voice's source: Queen Chrysalis. "What..." she paused to snarl viciously. "What do you think you're doing to My Daughter?!"

I looked at the queen's face in fear for the changeling between us. She was fueled by jealous rage in the last incident, but now what she felt was clearly righteous fury. The last thing I wanted was for something to happen again, but there was nothing I could do about it. "Your Majesty!" yelled out a familiar voice from a changeling that stepped in the queen's way: Caretaker. I could not see the face she was giving Chrysalis, but it managed to soften her fury which instantly became a hardened glare upon looking at the changeling nearest me.

I knew the situation was diffused, but there was also no way she was getting off unpunished. Chrysalis slowly walked towards her. "Leave this hive and pray that I never visit the hive you flee to. If that prayer is unanswered, pray that I never encounter you; and if that too is unanswered, pray that I don't recognize you."

Upon finished that tirade, she brought her face within an inch of the frightened changeling's. "I-I-I-I-I didn't kn..."

"Leave, while I am still...merciful." I've only seen Pinkie Pie run that fast. I looked back at Chrysalis and saw her clearly losing her restraint. With a vicious yell, she fired a charged magic beam at a wall, one that I didn't have to look at to know that it now had a mark that was burnt red-hot. The queen breathed laboriously for a long moment as Caretaker slowly approached. Once she placed a hoof on Chrysalis's back, the queen snapped at her, still seething. Caretaker backed away in fear until Chrysalis's breathing suddenly slowed followed by her walking past the smaller changeling with a slightly hung head. "Take care of her."

With the queen gone, I took my first good look at my Caretaker. There were some bandages wrapped around her body, but the most noticeable thing was the bandaged stump where her horn used to be. There was no way I could look at it without feeling a sickeningly, cold chill all over my skin. It was a harsh reminder of what my selfishness and anger had caused.

She reached behind me with her fore-hooves and pulled out the rod which I've forgotten about. "There you go. I'm really sorry you had to be alone with Caretaker-11. I could have sworn that none of the lower ranked members were told about you, but now we suddenly have only 10 Caretaker's for this hive now." She picked me up in her hooves, but the extent of her trembling limbs was too great to keep me from slipping from her grasp. "That's weird. I can't keep my hooves still." She used one limb to put pressure on the other, but that led to her whole body shaking. Once I saw the onset of shallow breathing begin, I knew there was no stopping the incoming panic attack.

I watched helplessly as she pranced around inflicting pain upon herself in a desperate effort to regain control. "I thought she was going to kill her. I thought she was going to kill me. What if I mess up? What if I make a mistake? Is...is this what fear is?" She snapped her unsteady gaze towards my face with her breathing visibly erratic. I found the look in her eyes unnerving, but I maintained eye contact with as neutral of an expression I could maintain.

The impromptu staring contest paid off as she returned to normal behavior gradually. With one final deep breath, she walked up to me, picked me up with her entire limbs, then placed me on the floor. "Sorry you had to see that, princess," she said crouched down to eye level. "I think it's time you get some exercise. We can't keep you in that crib forever now can we?

She collected up my toys and started kicking them around within my field of view: A clear attempt to goad me into chasing the objects. I would have preferred some books over physical activity, but I could see no good reason to ignore what she wanted from me.

As I chased the toys around, I occupied my mind with thinking on Caretaker's panic attack. There was no doubting that the incident destroyed Caretaker's trust in the queen. I couldn't be absolutely sure, but I got a feeling Chrysalis asked her to continue being my Caretaker, which she may have seen as granting the closest thing to an apology that the prideful ruler would allow herself to give. This, however, was being seen as a lose-lose situation by Caretaker where she thinks she is doomed if she does poorly or is doomed if she does too well. If I was going to help both of them get through this, to get over what I put them through, I'd have to do something I never thought I'd need to do for a couple of changelings: make them into friends.

Come next morning, I knew exactly what I to do. As for how I would do it: I had no idea. It wasn't like I was the Princess of Friendship anymore, but I had to try. Caretaker soon arrived and promptly took care of all my needs, even without the aid of her magic. Next came story-time, but I paid more attention to the sound of hoofsteps outside the room. Every time a set got close, I turned to the door hoping, even praying that Chrysalis would come in. This undesirably caused Caretaker to stiffen up in fear of the very thing I was asking for.

Story-time ended later than usual and was followed up by play-time. I still focused on the sounds of hoofsteps outside of the room while chasing the toys around and ignoring how much I felt like a dog. Another set came close, but these were much softer sounding than the typical hoofsteps. This time I knew that it had to be Chrysalis, yet I was still elated when she poked her head in. She clearly tried to remain hidden, but that didn't last long with me crawling towards her. "Your Majesty!" exclaimed Caretaker in surprise and worry.

Chrysalis was shocked for a moment before returning to her false superiority. "Pay me no mind Caretaker. I am merely checking upon my daughter's well being." She looked at the crib then around the room, but not down. "Where is she..." Caretaker gasped and Chrysalis stepped back in surprise when I bumped into her leg. We locked eyes and I did my best to look...cute, or as cute as a pale lump of flesh could be. I was still lacking in the plan department, but I at least needed to keep Chrysalis in the room. She alternated between looking at me or Caretaker a few times before stopping at the other adult in the room. "What is she doing?"

There was a slight pause. "I-I think she wants to play with you."

"Is that why there's a block in her mouth?"

I crossed my eyes inward and sure enough, there it was. 'Huh, forgot that I even had that.'

"Y-yes. I believe she wants you to kick it around for her."

"Why?" Chrysalis asked in confusion.

"Um, so she can chase it around," replied Caretaker as if it were obvious.

"No, not that!" She spoke with some force, panic, and shock adding instability to her voice. "Why now does she want to be with me?! Why now does my daughter suddenly not hate me?! Either she cries and throws a fit if I get near her, or she ignores me if she has no other choice! What changed?!" Her short tirade was a bad sign to me.

"I-I'm not sure." Caretaker’s voice squeaked in a way that made me imagine her balled up like Fluttershy does when she feels intimidated.

I could barely make out the guilt in Chrysalis's eyes before she screwed them shut. "I see. Perhaps I should leave her well-being to you."

I glared when she turned away.  'Oh no you don't! Que the whimpering!' A soft puppy-like whine came out causing Chrysalis to pause mid-step for a second before resuming her departure. I tried to follow, but Caretaker scooped me up, slung me over her shoulder, and held me there with one hoof; which put me in the perfect position to watch Chrysalis walk away. 'I-I failed.' I dropped the block I had; the sound of it hitting the floor echoed in my mind long after becoming silent. 'Of course I failed. I'd have to be crazy to think I could even keep them in the same room together for longer than a minute. Fallout from an outburst like Chrysalis' doesn't fade in just a week. I'd need a miracle to make it work.'

Caretaker must have noticed how I was feeling because she started stroking me after putting me back in my crib "Why...why did you do that? I'd think you'd hate...dislike her more than ever." She sighed loudly. "I wish you could understand me, that we could communicate. How amazing would it be if I could simply ask you what you're thinking?"

She left my side as my eyes slowly widened in deep realization. The idea of communicating with them had crossed my mind before, but I discarded the thought back when I had it. It would've been foal's-play to encourage yes or no questions and to respond with nods or shakes, but it wouldn't have served my purposes back then. Now it was the only choice I had with any chance of working.

The checklist immediately began to form in my head. 'Step 1: get caretaker's attention; Step 2: convince her we can communicate; Step 3: get her to tell Chrysalis; Step 4: apo...apologize for my behavior, and Step 5: become a mediator.' I realized it was simple and had holes, but it really was my best shot at making up for what I did to them.

I prepped myself with a deep breath but stopped when I heard loud footsteps approaching the room. 'That can't be Chrysalis: it's too soon.'

My assumption was proven correct when a slightly familiar changeling poked its head in. "Caretaker-1!" he commanded with the same voice as the Informant from yesterday.

She snapped into an erect position facing him and dropping the toys she was cleaning up. "Yes!"

"Your presence is required in the meeting hall: your rank needs to be reevaluated." His expression was stern.

Caretaker bunched up a bit and looked at him fearfully. "But, what about the princess?"

"The evaluation won't take long and princess or not, I am sure she'll be fine for a few minutes."

"But I--"

"Enough!" he yelled with a stomp of a hoof. "We can not have the princess being cared for by one who not our finest."

"But the Queen…"

"The Queen is not in a calm state of mind. As soon as you leave, I will seek out Caretaker-two, who will surely be you replacement."

Caretaker hesitantly shifted her focus between me and the other changeling. 'Please stay,’ I thought, but she ultimately left me alone with the other changeling.

I glared at the male changeling while he regarded me with a cool expression. "Hello there, princess." His tone came out smooth and harsh at the same time. "We're finally alone together." That and the following chuckle put me on guard.

I backed away from him but was stopped by my crib's walls. Never before had they felt more like a cage. Every time he stepped closer, the sickening feeling in the pit of my stomach grew. I dared not to think what that feeling really was, and I hoped that I wouldn't find out.