//------------------------------//
// Don't Feed the Plants 
// Story: Visiting Chaos 
// by Ink Well Inks Well 
//------------------------------//

	“I still don’t understand why we can’t go with you to help Twilight set up in Canterlot...” Screwball was pouting, every so often taking something out of Pinkie’s suitcase so she would have to repack it. This was her subtle way of telling Pinkie she didn’t want her to go, and the mare was tolerating it, for the most part, mostly because she understood her daughter was upset.
Besides, Screwball had done much, much worse.
“You can blame yourself for that, Screwy,” Pinkie shrugged, stuffing her party cannon into a bag it most certainly should not have fit into. “And your daddy.”
“Turn one pony’s bones to jelly-” Discord began, groaning.
“And you’re faced with a lawsuit!” Screwball finished, looking indignant. “We didn’t even hurt her!”
“Besides, she got what she deserved,” Discord growled. “We could have done quite a lot more, we restrained ourselves.”
Pinkie looked at them sympathetically. “Look, Upper Crust’s a real snob, and a real meanie, too, but you can’t just turn skeletal systems into delicious jelly!”
“Why not?!”
“Because then lawyers get involved and there’s a court case and your daddy gets a restraining order and it’s a huge headache for everypony involved,” she said, zipping up the case. “I mean, it was really funny when it happened but-”
“She made fun of my eyes! She called ‘em a crime against nature! Only Dad’s allowed t’do that! Daddy and me-”
“‘Daddy and I,’ Screwy,” Discord corrected absentmindedly.
The filly looked up at her dad, annoyed. “I’m tryin’ to defend you here dad.”
“Oh, right, of course, go on.”
Pinkie took this opportunity to put a hoof around the filly’s shoulders and say, “You gotta defend yourself against bullies, even adult ones, and using chaos to do it is okay, too, but next time you and Dissy should try something that doesn’t send internal organs smashing into each other, okay?”
Screwball groaned. “I still don’t get why we can’t go...” 
“Upper Crust and Jet Set are high society, they’re probably going to be at the Celebration! And they’re definitely going to be in Canterlot. If you and Dissy get within 300 feet-”
“Yes, yes, we’re aware,” the draconequus waved his hand. 
“Pinkie Pie, your friends are here!” Mrs. Cake’s voice drifted up the stairs. 
“Coming!” she beamed. “Alright you two, I’ll see you in a few days! Remember to feed Gummy, and do your homework, okay Screwy?” the child responded with a scowl, but nodded. “Okie dokie, I’ll see ya!” she kissed Screwball’s temple, and ruffled her mane, then waved to Discord, grabbing her bags. “Bye!”
She started to go, then stopped suddenly and turned around. “Don’t destroy anything?”
“We’ll make no promises.”
She laughed. “Yeah, that’s what I thought.” And with that she hopped away.
The filly watched Pinkie trot down the street, then Screwball turned towards her father, and put on the best puppy dog face she could. “So, Daddy, I don’t have to go to school while Mommy’s gone, do I? I only have two days left...”
Discord smiled and shook his head, “Of course you don’t, my little a-”
“TAKE HER TO SCHOOL TOMORROW!” came a high pitched voice in the distance, and Screwball sighed. Discord shrugged and gestured in the direction of Pinkie’s voice. “Sorry, Mom says no.”
Screwball frowned. “Since when do you listen to Mom?”
“I don’t li-”
“Yes you do,” she pouted.
He glared at his filly. “Fine, if you don’t want to go to school, you don’t have to-”
“Discord...” came a voice coming from the mirror. The pair looked into the glass incredulously, shocked to see Pinkie’s face glaring back at them. 
“That’s why I listen to your mother, Screwball.” He pointed to the mirror. “Fine, my dear, I’ll take her to school.”
Pinkie giggled. “Good. See ya!” and with that, she disappeared from the mirror.
“Dad, are you sure she’s not made’ve chaos magic, too?”
“You know, I’ve started to wonder that as well.”

_______________________________________________________________________________________

“Pinkie, where’d you go?” Twilight looked around the train station, her brow furrowing. How she had managed to lose her peppy pink friend?
“Oh, Dissy was gonna let Screwy miss school. I couldn’t let that happen!” she laughed, popping up behind the alicorn. Spike, who was on her back, jumped.
“Did you go all the way back to Sugarcube Corner?” Twilight asked, looking at the bakery in the distance. “And how did you even know that-”
“Sugarcube, are ya really tryin’ t’make sense’ve Pinkie Pie?” Applejack asked, chuckling.
“Right...” Twilight laughed sheepishly. “Of course, silly me.”
“All aboard!” the conductor called, and the ponies filed in. 
“You been doing your wing exercises?” Rainbow asked Twilight as they settled in. “You really gotta be in tip top shape to do the kinda stunt you’re gonna be trying to pull.”
“Oh, well, yes, I have,” she smiled, shifting her wings uncomfortably. “I also did some extra things I found in a few training books-”
“You didn’t do too much, did you?” she asked, concerned. “You don’t want to strain yourself.”
She looked nervous. “I don’t think so, but I-
“Don’t worry her so much, Rainbow Dash. Ah’m sure yer fine, Twi.”
“Thanks, Applejack.”
Rainbow scowled slightly. “Look, Applejack, I wasn’t-”
“So, um, how’s Screwball?” Fluttershy asked Pinkie, hoping to avoid the tense conversation between the two mares next to her, while Spike buried his head in a comic book to do the same thing. Pinkie grinned at the mention of her filly.
“Oh, she’s great! Yesterday she learned how to make pegasus wings on a unicorn... Wish she hadn’t used it on Pumpkin, though, that was a pretty stressful coupla hours!”
“She did what?” asked Rarity. “That’s... that’s incredible magic! She created an alicorn!”
Pinkie smiled, but waved a hoof. “Dissy and I were real proud, but he said that this isn’t really much more magic than his sister and the other draconequui he grew up with had when they were around her age.” she rubbed her chin. “Well, when they looked her age. Maturity wise or whatever. Chaos beings have really weird growth patterns, y’know? But she didn’t really make Pumpkin an alicorn. She was still at her normal magic level, she just had wings, too- like your wings at the Young Flyers Competition, Rarity! Just with feathers, instead. She can’t make a horn, though, but I think she’ll catch on soon!”
“How did she take you leaving for the trip?”
“Well, she was kinda annoyed, but I think she’ll have fun. Dissy’s gonna spoil her rotten for sure, she probably won’t even want me to come home!” she giggled.
“Will he really?” Rarity asked, surprised.
“Oh, for sure! He just can’t say no to Screwy, It’s kinda funny, really.”
Rarity nodded. “That’s actually rather sweet.”
“Yeah, he can be a bit of a softie!” she smiled. “Don’t tell him I said that though, I don’t think he’d be all that happy to hear me say that.”
“Of course not, darling,” the unicorn smiled. “I have to say, he seems to be quite good with children. I’m still a bit... nervous leaving him with Sweetie Belle, but she said he’s been a wonderful addition to their little club.”
“Oh, yeah, he’s been helping them to try and get cutie marks with chaos magic! Yesterday I think they tried Cutie Mark Crusaders shapeshifters. Dissy said you flirted with him, Rarity.”
“What? I never flirted with- oh...” Rarity turned bright red, her eyes widening in realization. “Oh my...he... he didn’t happen to shapeshift into a unicorn stallion yesterday, did he? With brown and grey fur-”
“And a golden apple cutie mark? Sure did!” she giggled. “He told me to tell you that he was awful flattered, but you’re not his type.”
“I- well, I-”
“Wait, that weirdo has a type?” Rainbow snorted, having stopped arguing with Applejack. “Geez, what kinda type is that? A psychopath?”
Pinkie shrugged. “I dunno! I asked, but he wouldn’t say!”
“He wouldn’t?”
“Nope! He even blushed! Screwy was laughing like crazy!”
Rainbow scratched her head. “You’re talking about Discord here, right? Like, Discord Discord?”
“Well, yeah! Why?”
“Oh my...” Rarity said, surprised.
“What?” Pinkie asked, quirking her head to the side curiously.
“Oh, um, nothing,” Rarity said quickly.
“Aw, c’mon, tell me!”
“Yeah, I’m confused too,” Rainbow said. “What’re you saying?”
“It... well, it really doesn’t matter, you know,” Rarity gave a weak smile, still unsure of her intuition was even correct. It wasn’t as if she wanted it to be, (nopony deserved for somepony as horrid as Discord to... oh, she didn’t even want to think about it!) so she simply chalked it up to reading too many romance novels in the last few months.
Rainbow looked at her suspiciously, then shrugged. “If you say so.” she looked out the window. They’d departed at dusk, and it was getting dark. The pony yawned, and Applejack smiled. 
“Maybe it’s time fer us t’get some shut-eye. We got a heck of a lot t’do tomorrow, not even includin’ settl’in’ in.”
The blue mare nodded. “Yeah, alright. Who’s bunking with who?”
“Well, how about Rarity with Fluttershy, Twi an’ Pinkie, an’ you an’ me, Dash?”
“Fine by me,” she shrugged. “Long as I get top bunk!”
“What about me?” Spike asked, looking up from his comic. 
“You get a bunk all to yourself, Spike!” Pinkie said happily.
The little reptile’s eyes lit up, and he closed his comic. “Sweet!” Without Twilight in the bunk below or above him, maybe he could just read the night away. Filisecond was in the middle of an enormous duel against the Violinist, and it was a four comic arc, he couldn’t stop reading now-
“You still have to go to bed at a reasonable time, though, Spike,” Twilight said, and Spike was half convinced she could read his thoughts. “After all, we have a big day tomorrow.”
The dragon sighed and sped up his reading, knowing he’d be sent to bed soon, and wanting to read as much as he could before then. 
Pinkie unclasped her suitcase, looking for a snack before she went to bed. She knew she’d packed a few donuts... She rifled through her things, then blinked in surprise. Then her face broke into a watery smile. “Aw, Dis...”
She pulled out a raggedy yellow plush, hugging it close. Rarity quirked a brow.
“What is that?”
“This is Bananas! I made him for Dissy on Hearth’s Warming Eve last year... I can’t believe he packed it for me!” She nuzzled the toy, beaming. She really couldn’t believe it, Discord never went a night without this little plush. Of course, he denied that the toy was a comfort thing in the slightest, but Pinkie knew better, and for Discord to pack him in her suitcase was pretty sweet of him.
She flopped down on her bunk, wrapping herself up as tight as a burrito. Twilight flew into the bunk above her, and everypony else snuggled into their respective beds as well, too tired to be kept awake by the sound of flipping pages and the soft glow emanating from Spike’s bed.
Well, actually, Pinkie was having a hard time falling asleep. She was so used to curling up with Discord and Screwball, having four heartbeats surrounding her, (Discord had three organs that made that sound, after all,) and having light snoring and the scent of chocolate and cotton candy lulling her to dreamland.
She sighed and shut her eyes, nuzzling the little plush Parasprite. It smelled of chocolate and sugar, and a smile graced her lips. She could almost imagine the warmth and the heartbeats... and that was enough.

	_______________________________________________________________________________________

Unbeknownst to her, Discord was having the same problem, and was not dealing with it as well.
“Dad!” came Screwball’s muffled voice, and she struggled to get out from under her father’s form. “Stop rollin’ around!”
“Hmm?” Discord asked, distracted, and half asleep. He tossed and turned a bit more, and Screwball sighed.
“Get off!” she kicked, and Discord recoiled, rubbing his stomach. “Geez, dad, what’s wrong with you?”
“Can’t sleep...” Usually when he couldn’t sleep, he’d either talk to Pinkie, as she often got up early, or pop into Twilight’s library, as she often studied late. She was always fascinated with his stories of Equestria long ago, always longing for more historical information, and it passed the time pleasantly enough. She still didn’t trust him further than she could throw him, and he knew that, but they were amicable to each other, at the least.
Neither one of those was an option right now, obviously.
“Well, you’re crushing me, so I can’t sleep!”
He curled up like a donut, and Screwball hopped in the middle. It wasn’t as snuggly as it usually was with Pinkie, and both father and daughter noticed.
He frowned and closed his eyes, trying to imagine Pinkie. It was strange, because he obviously didn’t miss her presence-- that would just be silly-- but the thought of Pinkie being there already made him relax a bit.
The filly was tossing a bit, too, frowning. The draconequus tightened his coils, and it was warmer and cuddlier. She smiled, but both could tell it was a little strange to be curled up so tightly. With two ponies, it was just as warm, but also looser and more relaxed. Now it... wasn’t.
Sleep was uneasy that night.

_______________________________________________________________________________________

Pinkie wasn’t one to keep schedules- spontaneity was a must in jokes and parties and pranks and laughter, and since her life goal was to produce as many smiles as possible, it was impossible to schedule and plan for those sort of things. Who knew when you would meet a gloomy gus? Pinkie sure didn’t, even with her Pinkie Sense and debatable psychic powers, and so planning was not something she did often.
But if she had been the type to make lists and charts and complex schedules, she wouldn’t have been able to squeeze in even a minute to miss her family.
There was just so much to do! The Summer Sun Celebration was basically a huge party, and, being a certified party pony, it was her duty to help out in any way she could, even if nopony actually asked her to do so. So she found herself running around constantly, between helping with decorations and treats and watching Twilight try to perform what she liked to call a Sonic Starburst, and really had almost no time to rest or think about Screwball and Discord. 
On the last day, she finally had some time to rest, letting her mind wander a bit as she watched her rather ungraceful alicorn friend fly through the air, dropping altitude and stopping to panic every few seconds in a flurry of feathers and fear. She and her friends cheered Twilight on, giggling to herself as Twilight told everypony not to call her a princess. She definitely understood that, it must be really weird to be a princess.
With some encouragement, the princess started back into the air to show them all the “big finish.”
She started to get the hang of it, but just as soon as that happened, she began to crash, faceplanting into the ground and kicking up dirt.
“Wow! That was a big finish!” Pinkie giggled, but stopped when her alicorn friend shot her a look. “Really, I mean it! It’s waaaaaaay better than I could do!”
Twilight sighed, and dusted herself off, and the girls made their way to the castle. “Thanks, Pinkie.”
“Don’t beat yourself up about it,” Dash smiled. “You’ll get the hang of it soon enough!” Twilight gave the pegasus a soft smile back.
“I hope so... I’m just not used to flying yet, you know?” she flexed her wings, looking at them in distrust. “It seems a bit early to be trying to do tricks.”
“Yeh’ll be soaring high before ya know it, Ah’m sure’ve it!” Applejack said encouragingly, and Twilight nodded.
“Thanks,” she smiled.
Rarity stopped in front of a stained glass window, admiring it. “You look amazing darling! They’re really captured your regality.”
“I suppose,” the former unicorn said, obviously uncomfortable.
“Oh, don't be so modest. It's everypony's dream to someday wear a crown and have their coronation ceremony preserved in stained glass for all to see!” the alabaster unicorn said,  sighing softly.
Rainbow snorted. “I don’t know if that’s everypony’s dream...”
“Most of my dreams are about frosting!” Pinkie said helpfully, before becoming lost in a daydream. She faintly heard something about missing the train and true friendship and the Elements of Harmony, but she was too wrapped up in her thoughts about sugar to pay much attention. 
“Right, Pinkie Pie?”
“...Creamy, creamy frosting...”
Fluttershy wiped some drool from her chin and smiled. “You should take that as a yes.”
The group made their way to the train station, bags already packed and in their compartments. 
“We're gonna write you and give you so many details, it'll be like you're in Ponyville with us! Right, girls?”
The others smiled and repeated her patented Pinkie Promise, and, after a few more reassurances that she wouldn’t be missing anything, boarded the train.
Pinkie scribbled a note quickly and handed a note to a nearby messenger pony, knowing that Twilight was going to think she was still missing something since she was silly like that.
She boarded the train and, of course, heard Twilight get her message within a matter of seconds, giggling and letting out a cheerful, “That’s me!” as the locomotive chugged away, before settling in for the ride home.

_______________________________________________________________________________________

	
When the train pulled into the station, there was a small crowd waiting to greet it, consisting of all the Crusaders, both official and honorary. The girls filed out of the train and immediately were surrounded by the Crusaders. 
“Mom!” Screwball beamed, hugging her mother tightly, watching as her friends swarmed their sisters and Angel Bunny, who was at the station as well, refused to greet Fluttershy. Well, refused for a minute or two before breaking down and nestling in her hair.
“Heya, Screwy!” she laughed. “How was staying with your dad?”
“I went to bed at four in the morning last night and had thirty six bottles of whipped cream for dinner!” she giggled, and Discord shook his head rapidly and tried to signal his daughter to stop talking.
“Sounds like fun!” Pinkie said, not even batting an eye. “You go to school?”
“Yup, even though I didn’t want to. I think Daddy was afraid you’d pop in through the mirror again,” she shrugged, before rubbing her eyes tiredly- the train had arrived pretty late, and after a few days without a good night’s sleep, she was exhausted. Pinkie smiled and knelt down slightly so the filly could sit on her back.
She flopped down happily, closing her eyes. “‘M glad you’re back, Mom...”
“I’m glad I’m back too,” she smiled, struggling to stand back up... Screwball wasn’t that much smaller than her, after all.
Discord noticed this and cleared his throat. “I can take her, if you’d like-”
“Nah, it’s fine,” she smiled, getting up. Nevertheless, Discord snapped, adjusting the gravity around Pinkie and Screwball so the filly seemed lighter. Pinkie rolled her eyes, but she smiled.
“How were things in in Canterlot, then? Does Princess Twilight finally know how to use those wings of hers?”
Pinkie shook her head. “No, not really, but she’s better than me at it!”
“I’m sure that if I were to give you wings, you would be wonderful at flying,” he said.
“Oooh, could you give me a pair tomorrow?”
He snorted. “Why not?”
She grinned. “Looking forward to it!” then her smile grew a bit softer. “Thanks for packing Bananas. He really helped me get to sleep.”
Discord suddenly grew a bit quiet, and he seemed to flush a bit. “Oh, is that where I put him?” he asked, avoiding her gaze.
The pony simply smiled and nudged him gently. “Well, even if it was a mistake, it was nice’ve you. Thanks.”
“... You’re welcome, Pinkie.”

_______________________________________________________________________________________


Discord and Screwball finally had a good nights’ rest that night- not only because Pinkie was back, but because the sun never rose the next morning.
Or maybe the moon just hadn’t set.
It was honestly very hard to tell, but whatever had happened, the result was the little family sleeping in far later than they usually did.
Not that Discord or Screwball particularly minded. The split sky was interesting, and they were all for it. They weren’t really sure why the sky was like that, but, hey, that was half the fun!
Well, they weren’t sure until the vines started to wreak havoc on the town, and then Discord knew exactly what they were dealing with.But as everypony scurried around trying to dispel the weeds, he stayed silent. Nopony had asked him what they were, so why should he tell anypony? Besides, they weren’t hurting anypony, and it was fun to watch them spread. Pinkie
Pinkie was dealing with them well, which didn’t surprise him in the slightest, although he was a little amused by her panicked exclamation of “Don’t feed the plants!” when Pumpkin tried to smash a vine with a cupcake. Obviously he made sure the vines didn’t touch the twins, coaxing them back from the foals whenever they got too close.
Screwball, in the meantime, wasn’t really doing anything to stop the vines, instead relaxing on one with what seemed to be a margarita in one hoof. Discord raised a brow and she scowled, turning it into a rootbeer float. 
Pinkie slid down one and flipped, landing on another that was getting a bit too close to the bakery display case. She heard ponies screeching outside, looked out the window worriedly, rushing outside when she saw Rainbow Dash kicking a vine away from Fluttershy.
“Dad, I’m going with Mom,” Screwball, said. “Seems more exciting.”
“Have fun,” Discord shrugged, reclining on a vine, watching, amused, as Pound smashed a vine with a chair. That baby sure was strong.
As Screwy galloped after her mother, she could faintly hear Applejack say, “The forest is expandin', y'all, and judgin' by how fast it's movin', it doesn't seem content just takin' over Ponyville... I reckon before long, it'll cover half of Equestria!”
“Cool!” she grinned, and the farm pony turned around, looking at her, a bit horrified. “What? I like it like this!” 
Applejack shook her head, as Pinkie shrugged. She wasn’t a fan of the vines herself, but she certainly understood why her daughter was.
“Maybe we should go to the library? I’m sure we could get some answers there,” Fluttershy suggested.
Screwball sighed, but followed her mother and the rest of the group to Golden Oaks. So much for being more exciting...
“Alright, so how has Twilight been shelving the books?” Rainbow asked, scanning the covers. “It seems to change like every week.”
“Publication date, duh,” Screwy said, rolling her swirling eyes.
The group looked at her, confused.
“Look,” she said, pulling out a volume, “This is the oldest recorded legend of all time, Dad told me about it. Really, it’s obvious.” 
“Great job, Screwy!” Pinkie grinned.
“What an absurd way of organizing,” Rarity said.
Screwball shrugged. “Makes sense to me.”
They all grabbed a book, not really knowing what to look for, scanning the tomes, hoping to find anything that could help them dispel the vines. Unsurprisingly, Screwball kept her mouth shut on the situation, instead deciding to read some sort of horror story. It was okay, but could really use some work, she saw the twist coming for a mile away.
When Twilight burst through the window, she barely even looked up, focusing instead on the novel in her hooves.
“Oh, thank goodness!” Rarity smiled.
“Oh, I hope you know we wouldn't normally go through your books without permission...” Fluttershy said, as Spike kissed the ground and thanked the heavens. Screwball snorted at the dragon, and he gave her a dirty look, then absolutely chortled at Twilight’s reaction.
“Yeah, understatement of the century!” she laughed, ignoring a pointed look from Pinkie.
“I dunno if you've noticed, but the Everfree Forest is just a teeny-tiny bit out of control,” Pinkie said.
“Guess it turned out you were missin' something here in Ponyville after all.”
“But perhaps you already know what's causing all of this calamity. Has Princess Celestia sent you to dispel it posthaste?” Rarity asked hopefully.
“Not exactly. You see, Princess Celestia is, well... she and Princess Luna are both...” Twilight looked more uncomfortable and panicked with each syllable, until Spike cut her off, saying, “Gone missing!”
“What?!” Screwball asked, finally looking up from her book.
“I don't know who has taken them, but I've got a hunch we're going to need the Elements of Harmony to get them back.”
“Oh, yeah,” Rainbow Dash grinned, “just like old times!”
“A-boo-yah!” Pinkie cheered.
“I told ya we'd always be connected by the Elements,” Applejack smiled softly, then sighed. “Now we just gotta figure out who to aim these bad boys at so we can get Celestia and Luna back and keep the rest of Equestria from becoming plant food! Any ideas?”
Twilight thought for a minute, and Pinkie looked up from her coloring book. “Well, I haven’t found squat in any of the books I’ve been looking for!” she grabbed a crayon, smiling. “Oops, missed a spot!”
Screwball held out a crayon. “I’m thinking orange.”
“Oh, good call,” she agreed. 
The rest paid the pair no mind, and Twilight continued. “Half day, half night... strange weather patterns... out of control plants. I think I'm starting to get a pretty good idea of who we're up against.”
Pinkie looked up in interest, and the pair followed as the rest of the Elements trotted into town.
Once they were in a small clearing, Twilight concentrated, and after the usual showy magic rainbows, Discord appeared, apparently having decided to take a shower.
“Wait, what?!” Screwball shrieked, looking at Twilight in disbelief. “You can’t be serious!”
Twilight refused to look at the filly, simply going up to Discord, who had already begun to tease the mare, seemingly unaware of why he was there.
“E-nough! Release Princess Celestia and Princess Luna, and stop the Everfree Forest from invading!”
“Wait!” Pinkie stepped forward, brow furrowed. “Why do you think he did this?”
“It just makes sense, Pinkie. I’m sorry,” Twilight shook her head.
“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” said Discord, crossing his arms.
“Don't you play dumb with us, Discord! We know you're the one behind all of this!” Applejack frowned.
“Don't get me wrong. I absolutely love what you've done with the place, but I couldn't possibly take responsibility. I'm reformed, don't you remember?”
“Yeah, right! This has got your cloven hoofprints all over it!” Rainbow scowled.
“I'll have you know that I have only one cloven hoof,” Discord said, kicking Rainbow’s rump. “Such accusations. And here I thought we were friends,” he pouted indignantly.
“Discord,” Twilight said, warningly.
“Ladies, ladies, I'm innocent. Would I lie to you?” 
“Yes!” said all the girls, except for Pinkie and Screwball, who simply said, “Well... maybe.”
“Well then, it seems we've reached an impasse. I'm telling the truth, but you think I'm lying. What do friends like us do in a situation like this, Princess Twilight?” he tapped the unicorn on the nose. “Congrats, by the way, on the promotion. You totally deserve it.”
Screwball snickered at the look on Twilight’s face, but the grin was lost the minute she heard Rainbow say, “I say we blast him back to stone!”
The pit in the child’s stomach only worsened as the other girls seemed to agree.
“No!” she said, stepping in front of her father, who was currently bracing himself. She growled, pawing at the ground, then whined when her father pushed her behind him, trying to claw back to the front to shield him.
“Are you crazy?!” Pinkie asked, eyes wide, taking the place where her daughter had been standing. “You can’t do that!”
“Pinkie-”
“No!” she scowled, her gaze icey cold. 
“Well, finally, somepony willing to give me the benefit of the doubt. You could all learn a lot from my dear, dear Pinkie Pie,” he smiled, scooping her up.
“If you’re not the one responsible, then help us figure out who is!” 
“I suppose I could, but after all the hoof pointing and besmirching of my good name, I just don't know if I'm up to it!” he set Pinkie down so that he could cross his arms and pout.
Twilight groaned, until Discord said, “Why don't you ask your zebra friend if she knows anything?”
“Zecora!” Twilight brightened, running up to the zebra.
Pinkie Pie smiled at Discord, mouthing a quick, “Thanks,” while Discord simply shrugged, shooing her along. 
“From my home, I have had to flee! The forest has grown too wild, even for me,” Zecora said, straining under the weight of her cart.
Applejack asked, “Any idea why all this is happenin'?”
“I'm afraid it is a mystery to me as well, but I may have something that, if combined with a spell... I do not dare to use it myself, the results would be tragic. It only responds to Alicorn magic,” she looked pointedly at Twilight. “Princess Twilight, you can turn the potion from purple to white. After a sip, you may see why the sky is day and night.”
Twilight looked at the zebra, then nodded, straining as she tried to change the potion. Eventually, magic flowed from her horn-- familiar looking dark magic, surprisingly enough. Discord’s brow raised at that. Well, well, well, who could have known that prissy little mare could do something like that?
The potion bubbled and changed, and Pinkie looked on in awe, letting out a soft, “Oooh...”
The alicorn sipped the potion, and her eyes glowed a bright, blinding light.
She started to mutter softly, and Discord poofed up a couch and popcorn, looking at the scene in excitement.
The excitement soon dropped, when Twilight muttered something about sending Luna back to the moon. 
What in the wide, wide realm of Equestria could Twilight be seeing to make her say that?
When Pinkie and Screwball heard that, they both looked at Discord, concerned. The others didn’t seem to notice.
“Are those the Elements of Harmony? But that's how they looked in... the past. This is the night you banished her...” 
Discord’s face contorted, his expression no longer one of confusion and, although he wouldn’t admit it, worry, but one of extreme uncomfortableness. He hadn’t ever wanted to see or hear his baby sister being banished to the moon, even indirectly...
But as Twilight came to, he composed himself, forcing a smile on his face.
The alicorn looked around, dazed. “Why are you all looking at me like that?”
“It's just... you were mumblin' to yourself...” Applejack said, uncomfortable.
“Ooh! And don't forget the uncontrollable sobbing!” Pinkie interjected.
“We were really worried about you.”
“I for one found it delightful,” the draconequus bluffed, “Sort of a one-pony theater piece, if you will. You should really consider taking it on the road.” he smiled, slithering over towards the mare, a moving poser in his claw.
The mare scowled, ignoring him.
“Did you find out whose rump we need to kick and where we can find them?” asked Rainbow.
“I saw something from a long time ago. But it didn't explain what's happening now...” she said.
“Perhaps farther back still are the answers you seek,” Zecora suggested. “Another sip of the potion will give you a peek.”
“You sure about this?” Spike asked uncertainly.
Twilight gulped, but took a long sip.
“Oh, I do hope she breaks into a song this time!” Discord laughed, poofing up a camera, a jacket, a scarf and a beret.
He started to film, laughing at her facial expressions until--
“This must be when they turned Discord into stone...”
Discord stiffened, paling, and this time, all the ponies glanced at him. Screwball’s eyes widened, and she didn’t protest when a large, fluffy pair of noise cancelling earmuffs poofed onto her head. Discord didn’t know what Twilight was going to say next, but he didn’t want his filly to hear it. He didn’t even want to hear it.
Having your siblings imprison you for eternity wasn’t exactly a nice memory.
He was so lost in his memory that he didn’t even notice Pinkie nuzzling against him, and didn’t catch anything about the tree.
“So what did you find out?” Discord snapped out of his memory when Spike spoke, quickly poofing Screwy’s earmuffs away and poofing up a couch and popcorn, hoping to look nonchalant.
“I still don't know what's happened to Princess Luna and Princess Celestia, but I think I know why the Everfree Forest is acting this way. Something's happened to the Tree of Harmony,” she explained.
Discord raised a brow, lowering his 3-D glasses.
Rainbow seemed confused. “The tree of what now?”
“It's where Princess Celestia and Princess Luna found the Elements. I think it's in danger.”
“Well, all right then!” Applejack grinned. “Let's go save a... tree.” the grin slipped. “Uh... where is it exactly?”
“I think it's in... there,” the alicorn gulped, pointing to her hoof to the Everfree Forest.
Discord grinned. “Ooh-hoo! I'm going to need more popcorn!”
Screwy’s eyes widened in excitement, and she hovered slightly. “Wait, you guys are going to the forest?”
“Yeah, but I dunno if you should go to the Tree of Harmony, Screwy,” Pinkie said. “Your chaos magic might not work there, ‘cause’ve the Harmony and all that.”
“Oh... okay...” she sighed.
“See you later,” she said, kissing the filly’s temple and ruffling her mane. With that, she trotted off.
She turned around, facing her dad. “Aren’t we going after them?”
Discord shrugged, poofing Gummy up and filing his claws. He had never really liked the alligator anyway. “Why should we? Pinkie was probably right, I’ve never felt quite right around the tree. I’m not really itching to be drained of power again.”
She shrugged. “Alright, good point.” She concentrated, changing a vine into a swing and rocking herself lazily. “I don’t get why we can’t just keep everything the way it is. This is so much better!”
He shrugged. “Ponies don’t like change. It’s really quite annoying.” 
Screwball nodded. “Yeah...” then she shifted uncomfortably, deep in thought. “Uh, Daddy?”
He stopped filing his claws for the moment, looking at her, brow raised. “Yes?”
“Why... Why did Auntie Tia and Auntie Lulu turn you to stone? I mean, I know why, but... couldn’t they have done something else?” her voice was soft and unsure, something very unlike the hyperactive filly.
He blinked, taken aback, then forced a smile. “Because they’re jerks.”
“Dad...” Screwball looked at him, and he groaned.
“I became a dictator-”
“Which I already know, and I think that’s pretty neat. I’d be a dictator if I could!” she smiled. Then the smile slipped away. “But why? I thought you got along with ‘em.”
“I did...”
“So...”
“So I stopped getting along with them.”
“Dad-”
Luckily for Discord, Twilight stumbled out of the forest at that very moment, providing the perfect opportunity for him to ignore his daughter’s uncomfortable questions.
“Discord!” Twilight snapped, and Discord noticed, for the first time, two ponies being held by the vines, begging for help. He looked almost sheepish, and snapped his fingers, releasing them. The ponies ran off without a second thought, and Discord scowled.
“You're welcome! Hmph...” he turned to Twilight. “No luck finding your tree?”
“We ran into some trouble, and my friends decided it would be best if I returned to Ponyville while they continue the search,” she sighed. “Equestria will need me if Princess Celestia and Princess Luna don't return.”
Well, technically he was probably closer in the royal bloodline, but he didn’t say that. Instead, he just said, “I'm just surprised that you agreed to their plan. I never thought you'd be the kind of pony who would think she was better than everypony else.”
Screwball grinned, realizing what her father was doing.
Twilight looked offended. “I don't think I'm better than anypony!”
“Oh, well, how silly of me to assume that you would think that. All you did was choose to keep your precious princess self out of harm's way while your friends thrust themselves right into it. I'm sure you'll all be the best of pals again when they return from their terrifying yet deeply bonding experience that they're having without you.” 
Screwball giggled as she watched her father manipulate the pony, smiling as she saw him get under her skin.
“I never should have agreed to come back here,” Twilight said, shaking her head, and turned back, galloping into the forest.
Spike followed her, frowning. “Come on, Twilight. Discord may be reformed, but he's not that reformed. He's just trying to get under your skin!”
“Well, it’s working!”
Screwball looked at her dad. “Can I go with them? I dunno, I think it’ll be interesting.”
Discord stroked his beard. “Well... I suppose. Don’t let your mother see you, and stay away from the tree.”
“‘Kay, Dad, will do,” she nodded, hovering after the dragon and the alicorn. She buzzed through the air, hiding in the trees above, watching the purple pair carefully and following where they went.
“...Are we there yet?” Spike asked.
“I don't know where we are. We're lost,” the mare sighed. “I never should have left my friends.”
“We can't just give up. Maybe if I get up there, I'll be able to spot 'em,” Spike climbed the tree Screwball was in, and she concentrated, hoping to hide. Unfortunately, she was too late. “Screwball?”
“Shhh!” she hissed. “If Twilight finds out I’m here, she’ll tell Mom!”
The dragon blinked, then shrugged. He didn’t have anything against Screwball, he had no reason to tattle on her. “Fine.” He looked from his branch, and smiled. “Well, what do you know? Twilight?” The pair peered down, only to see Twilight being attacked by plants.
The dragon gasped. “Oh no...” he grabbed Screwball’s hoof. “C’mon, we gotta warn the others!”
The drake dragged her out of the tree, rushing down into the chasm.
“...We all agreed it was the best thing, Rainbow Dash! We were tryin' to protect her!”
Spike tripped, falling down the stairs. Screwball groaned, hovering after him, and poofing up a mattress for him to land on.
He landed with a loud thump, and immediately tried to explain what was going on to his friends, but was only able to let out, “Twilight! Trouble! Help!”
They looked at him in concern, but he wasn’t able to say anything else. Honestly, Screwball didn’t care much what happened to Twilight, but she knew her mom would be upset if the bookish Princess got hurt, so she cleared her throat. “Uh, she’s up here...”
Pinkie looked at Screwball, but the filly cut her off before she could say anything. “Look, you can get angry at me later, but weird plant thingies are shooting gas at Twilight and I think she might be dying, so we should probably do something.”
The mare nodded, and the five Elements jumped into action, following Spike and Screwball to the scene.
And not a moment too soon, as it looked like Twilight was about to take her final breath. A plant sprung up, rearing to strike with the final blow, when it was lassoed to the ground.
“Listen here, you rabid rhododendrons!” Applejack drawled, “Ya mess with one of us, ya mess with all of us!”
Pinkie blew a party horn, then looked at Screwball and motioned to a tree branch, very obviously telling her to stay there.
The filly shrunk slightly and sighed, resigned to watching the fight from the wooden limb. To her credit, she did turn a few of the plants to delicious Redvines, but she figured if she did much more, Pinkie would be annoyed.
The fight seemed just about over-- no, wait! There was still one plant, and it was headed straight for her mom. Slightly panicked, she concentrated as hard as she could, turning it into candy, right as Twilight shot it with a laser beam. The result was a sickly sweet smelling puddle of thick red gunk, melted, warm, and almost resembling blood. Pinkie looked behind her, then up at Screwball, who smiled sheepishly, relieved when her mother smiled back.
“Ah sure am glad you came looking for us,” Applejack said, and Twilight shook her head.
“Not as glad as I am that you found me.”
Rarity smiled. “The truth of it is, Twilight, we're simply lost without you.”
“Yeah,” Rainbow nodded in agreement. “Equestria may need its princess...”
“... But we need our friend,” Fluttershy finished.
Twilight smiled, and Screwball jumped down hesitantly, making her way to the group. Twilight seemed more than a bit surprised to see her, but, upon seeing all the candy vines surrounding her, the shock ebbed away.
“We have some good news,” Applejack said. “We found the tree!”
“It’s in pretty terrible shape though,” Pinkie frowned. “Like, really, really bad...”
“Well, let’s see if we can fix it, girls,” Twilight said determinedly, and they started towards the tree.
Screwball trailed behind, trotting down the stairs, but hanging back when they actually approached the tree. Her parents had been right, she already felt a bit weaker in its presence, even with it being so sick, and her beanie propellor slowed down to a faint buzz.
Pinkie looked at her, concerned, but she told her that she was fine, and the party pony continued on with her friends.
“I know how we can save the tree,” Twilight said, frowning. She turned to face the others. “We have to give it the Elements of Harmony!”
Screwball found herself smiling at that. With those infernal things out of the way, her dad didn’t have to watch his back with whatever he did... Oh, this was the best news she’d heard all day!
“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” Rainbow Dash said. “How are we supposed to protect Equestria?”
“How are we meant to rein Discord in if we can't use the Elements to turn him back to stone?” Rarity mused.
Ever the mature little immortal incarnation of chaos, Screwball stuck her tongue out at the prissy unicorn.
Applejack looked uncertain. “Twilight... The Elements of Harmony... They're what keep us connected no matter what...”
“You're right about one thing, Applejack. The Elements of Harmony did bring us together. But it isn't the Elements that will keep us connected. It's our friendship. And it's more important and more powerful than any magic,” she looked at all of her friends, head bowed humbly and smile gentle. “My new role in Equestria may mean I have to take on new responsibilities, and our friendships may be tested, but they will never, ever be broken.” she raised her head, looking determined. “There's no time to lose. Everypony ready?”
The girls all nodded. “Ready!”
With that, the Elements were given back to the tree, and the crystal trunk began to glow. The fines around the tree disintegrated, and from the tangled mess the Princesses emerged. Screwball smiled and gave a little wave, which Celestia acknowledged with a smile and a nod, while Luna gave a small laugh.
“We know how difficult it must have been for you to give up the Elements,” Celestia said, looking at her former student with great fondness. “It took great courage to relinquish them.”
Then all attention was turned to the large flower that had sprouted from the roots of the tree. When Twilight nudged it, its petals drooped to show a six sided box.
“What's inside it? How am I supposed to open it?” Twilight asked.
“Six locks, six keys,” Luna observed.
“I do not know where they are,” Celestia admitted. “But I do know that it is a mystery you will not be solving alone.”
The alicorn smiled.

	_______________________________________________________________________________________


“Bravo, ladies, bravo! How ever did you save the day this time? Blast the beastie with your magic necklaces, I presume?” the draconequus cackled, then looked at Applejack’s neck curiously, donning a cowboy outfit for the occasion. “Where are those little trinkets of yours? You know, the ones you use to send me back to my extremely uncomfortable stone prison?”
The farmpony sighed. “Gone...”
“Gone? Discord looked surprised. Then a smile crept up onto his face. “Gone...”
“Hey now, don’t you get any ideas, buster!” Pinkie said, pointing a hoof accusingly. “I’m still not happy with you!”
“What?” Discord looked confused. “Why?”
“Why?! You let Screwy wander into the forest alone, that’s why!”
“Well, that’s hardly my fault, it was her idea!”
“How old is she again, Dissy?”
“... Three, technically.”
“Right, and how old are you?”
“Ten thousand, give or take...”
She looked at him pointedly. “And you’re her father...”
He rubbed his neck sheepishly. “I designed her to be immortal, she’d have been alright-”
“That’s not the point, Dissy!”
He scowled, and rolled his eyes, but he had to admit she had a point. “So what should I do to get back in your good graces?”
“Well...” she thought for a moment. “There’s  a lot of ginormous messes all around Ponyville, can you help us out?”
“Fine,” Discord conceded, snapping his fingers, only to appear in a frilly Prench maid’s outfit. “But I don’t do windows.”
Pinkie giggled slightly... she really couldn’t stay mad at him for too long.
“One thing I don't get,” Applejack said, scratching her head. “Why did all this happen now?”
“I have no idea!” Discord put a claw to his chin and looked up at the sky in thought. “Those seeds I planted should have sprouted up ages ago!”
Okay, maybe she could stay angry at him for a little while longer.
“What did you say?!” Twilight asked, furious.
“Oh, why should I try to explain it when you can see for yourself?” the trickster poofed up the potion, and Twilight took a sip, her eyes glowing white.
Discord was kind enough to explain to all the  ponies who couldn’t see what Twilight could. “You see, I planted these seeds right before I got turned to stone for the first time- kind of a fail safe, if you will. If something were to happen to me, those seeds would have spread chaos in my place, and trapped my dear sisters, allowing me free reign! Well, obviously things didn't go according to my original plan. My plunderseeds should have stolen the magic from the Tree of Harmony and captured Princess Celestia and Princess Luna thousands of moons ago. Alas, it seems the tree had enough magic to keep the seeds from growing up big and strong. Until now, that is.”
Twilight awoke, and glared at Discord. “You realize this is information we could have used hours ago?!”
Discord looked down at her condescendingly. “And rob you of a valuable lesson about being princess?” he pinched her cheek, tutting, as Screwball howled with laughter in the background. “What kind of friend do you think I am?”
And, as weird as it was, Pinkie had to agree he had a point. Sure, he was being a bit of a... well, for lack of a better word, an ass... but he was teaching her a pretty good lesson, in the only way he knew how.
Well, he probably knew other ways, but this way was probably the most fun, for him at least. 
And, now that she thought about it, it had been pretty interesting for everypony else, too.
_______________________________________________________________________________________

The father and daughter pair hovered directly above Upper Crust and Jet set, exactly three hundred feet away from their heads, cackling all the while. Technically they weren’t against the restraining order, and, honestly, the view of the sun raising was much better from here then anywhere in the general crowd-- and, of course, the position was only made better by the dirty looks they kept getting from the aristocratic couple, who tended to look at the pair and scowl, knowing they were helpless to do anything else.
Technically, the pair were following the rules, per Pinkie’s orders. (And the Equestrian High Court’s but honestly, they cared a lot less about that than they did about Pinkie’s rules.)
And as they watched Twilight fly through the air, her Sonic Starburst straking the sky in a pink hue, and felt the glares of the snobby couple burrow a hole though their backs, they realized something.
Maybe following the rules every once in a while could be alright.
...Within reason, of course, they decided, as they inconspicuously lowered themselves a few feet.
Hey, 295 feet was close enough.