//------------------------------// // The Antics of Little Twily // Story: The Paragon Guard // by Kaptein //------------------------------// There is something about unicorns that makes me worry about being one. We have magic. We have a bony protrusion from our skulls that is capable of channeling the raw energies of the universe, that can be used to forge fires, knit wounds closed and even move the celestial bodies around, if you can channel enough of it. What do we use it for? Mundane things. Ordinary, day-to-day events just to make our lives a teensy bit easier; opening a faucet or lifting a glass of water or even moving a paint brush if we're feeling creative. Unicorns these days really don’t understand the power they’ve been blessed with. Which is why when a little purple menace decided to pop into our lives, her curiosity surrounding that fundamental unicorn ability was somewhat refreshing and perhaps just a little terrifying. Me? Oh - Sorry. I’m Leaf Brambles. I’m the current Team Lead of the Mage-Casters. Of course, that title is a little archaic; I’d prefer something like Unicorn Division or something more practical. Captain Stone Craft is the leader of the Flight-Masters and Velvet Ward is the leader of the Earth-Grinders. Ugh, just thinking of those stupid titles is giving me a headache... I’m getting off track. The purple menace, yes. The resounding explosion that shook the castle had sent all of us into high alert. In seconds, six Paragons surrounded Celestia. Two minutes later and the rest of us joined her. I’ve worked it out - it takes almost exactly 62 seconds for six Paragon to fully suit up and another twelve to mass-teleport to Celestia. 62 seconds? Well, us unicorns use our ‘mundane’ magic to practically fling our armour onto the rest of the guard. It’s a well-practiced, well-oiled routine. To say I was surprised to see a massive dragon towering over Canterlot, a look on his face suggesting he’d just passed wind, forgotten about it, and was wondering what that strange smell was...well, I’d say that ‘surprise’ doesn’t quite cut it. A dragon...in Canterlot. We hadn’t really accounted for that in the past and I guess it came back to rear its ugly purple head at us now. Sure, we’ve got plans for if the dragons ever decide to attack us, but not for one mysteriously popping into existence... Then again, the fact that the dragon immediately shrunk down and disappeared left us more confused than surprised. What really sent us reeling was when Celestia’s off-hoof comment about how it was about time. I could only imagine the disbelief on my face when the Princess told us that there wasn’t an immediate threat, despite the hundred-foot tall dragon and the mysterious ‘Rainboom’. But hey, what do we know? Celestia is thousands of years old. The oldest of us is Stone Craft, and he’s what, Forty? Fifty? Even he trusts Celestia’s judgement unquestioningly. So did the rest of us. Turns out Celestia took interest in this little unicorn filly. Twilight Sparkle; she was inquisitive, intelligent but most of all had an unnatural talent at magic itself. This was a bad thing. The purple menace. At every turn that filly was trying to do something she really, really shouldn’t be. She tried and failed a total of three times to get into the forbidden section of the castle library. The fourth time? She made it out with a dark-magic book, and thank Celestia she only managed to learn one spell from it before we found out. We found out exactly which spell when trying to deal with a sudden riot inside Canterlot Castle one evening. Celestia was having a well-deserved rest and it required minimal duty - only three Paragons were needed. Myself, Perfect Measure and Aegis Hammer were on duty at the time, with Measure having taken that moment to perform a quick perimeter sweep while the two of us kept watch outside Celestia’s door. A sudden, loud and thunderous rabble of ponies came pounding down the halls, snapping us to attention. Guards, servants and even the guests were rampaging down the halls screaming about their desire for something and were too caught up fighting over each other to even bother stating what they were after. I was one of the lucky ones. Immediately after spotting the little red ball the mob was chasing after, I felt a sudden urge to own it. To possess it. By Celestia’s name, I needed that ball more than anything I have ever needed in my entire life! Which is when I realised it was enchanted. It took a monumental effort, some short string of curse words and a headache inducing amount of magic to activate a warding spell. The other Paragon...wasn’t so lucky. “I want it…” I heard Aegis Hammer mutter. “Aegis, focus. It’s an enchanted ball.” I knew my words would fall on deaf ears, but I had to try regardless. “I - I need it…” Aegis continued, completely oblivious to what I said. Her halberd dropped to the floor with a clatter which I suppose was for the best because what happened next was nothing short of terrifying. The Paragon Guard are trained in martial combat and Aegis, being an ex-blacksmith, was large even when compared to earth-pony standards. She’s the only one who can last more than ten seconds against Apple Bake in a hoof-wrestle. “Aegis...no,” I warned, moving in front of her. “But! It’s bouncy!” she whined, wings flaring out. “Aegis, it’s a high-level enchantment and your mind is being manipulated!” “It’s red!” she cried out again, craning her neck to try and see past me. “I want it and I need it!” “Aegis, sto - !” I tried to order but was promptly bowled over by what felt like a freight train that forgot how to use its brakes. Leaping to my hooves, I shouted down the corridor. “Aegis Hammer! I order you back here! Now!” I was too late - the pegasus had already made it around the corner with the rest of the mob following the ball. There was a loud crash followed by a series of painful thuds and several seconds of worrying silence. I’m not sure if it was a delusional hallucination or if I could actually hear the soft ponging noise of the ball as it bounced around the corner, that painful compulsion spell trying ever so desperately to worm itself into my mind. “I want it!” “I need it!” It was pandemonium. I could’ve sworn every guest, guard and servant in the palace was charging towards me hungry for that rubber ball. Punches and shoves were thrown haphazardly. The tiny red ball rolled past me and it was all I could do to pay it no mind. I had a greater threat to deal with: an indomitable wall of ponies. In a flash a shield-spell was ready to protect myself. I heard the unmistakable cry of one very large pegasus. “Get out of the way!” The rioting crowd almost exploded outwards in a shower of suddenly and violently misplaced ponies as Aegis Hammer bowled through the lot, wings spread out and a furious glint in her eyes. “Oh crumbs…” I muttered. What else was I supposed to do? I was almost able to throw up a frontal shield spell but Aegis was too fast. My basic shield wasn’t nearly powerful enough to protect against the rampaging pegasus. A second time I got slammed into by the equivalent force of a freight train, spots filling my vision this time. It took a few seconds to re-orientate myself before coming to a second, crushing realisation. “Oh crumbs…” I muttered again, hearing the commotion of the recovering mob behind me. No. Not this time! I was not about to become a red carpet for a riot of ponies I haven’t met yet! Swinging around, my shield spell was fully prepped and charged. “Come at me!” The mob slammed into a magical wall with the fury of a thousand rabid manticores, but by Celestia’s name I would not budge. I charged a second spell at the base of my horn, the tingling sensation and the concentration needed starting to overwrite the warding spell. “All of you are enchanted!” I cried out. “A mind manipulation spell is overwriting your common sense!” “But I need that wonderful, amazing ball!” somepony called out. An argument quickly rose up amongst the ranks on who wanted and need the ball the most. It was sickening, in a way. “Enough!” I commanded, unleashing the charged mass-dispel. In hindsight it wasn’t the most well thought out spell I could have cast, considering my shield was caught up in the dispel and disappeared instantly. I suddenly found myself the sole object holding up a wall of at least 30 ponies. “Oh crumbs.” Being crushed by a mob of ponies was definitely not on my bucket list, but I decided to check it off anyways. Admittedly, all that extra weight did help work out a cramp behind my left shoulder, which was nice. The extra bruises and other pains weren’t so nice, though, and I think I may have displaced a vertebra or two. I’m sure my chiropractor will love me for it. It took more minutes that I cared to count to pry myself from pony pile-up. Suffice to say, everypony involved looked thoroughly embarrassed about the whole incident. A stern look was all it took to send them on their way. All that was left was one pegasus guard who was nowhere in sight. I wanted to use the word ‘crumbs’ again, but considering the situation I felt a different word was necessary. A more powerful and elegant word that would properly encapsulate how I exactly felt at that moment in that situation. “Bollocks.” I found the oversized pegasi giggling like a mad mare to herself, stroking a tiny red ball. The compulsion spell was still thickly wrapped around it but my own mental defenses had been thoroughly hardened by now to resist its wicked charms. The mare quickly wrapped her wings around it protectively at the sight of me approaching. “Aegis Hammer, drop that ball. Now.” My voice was calm but firm. I needed direct line-of-sight in order to remove the spell from the object and with Aegis shielding it, that was next to impossible. She shook her head, curling further around the ball. “Nuh-uh.” My eyes narrowed, the fury glinting behind them enough to send the pegasus in a quivering wreck. She shook her head, still refusing to give up the ball. I stamped my hoof, pulling myself to my full height. “As the commanding officer on duty, I order you to release custody of that ball and to step away from it.” I didn’t realise the kind of effect a direct military order would have on Aegis. All Paragon Guards are trained to follow orders to the letter and to never question it. It was a part of our mental conditioning, if you wanted to call it that. The look of sheer abject terror on her face as her body slowly started to spasm sent a few pangs of doubt into me. Her eyes went as wide as saucers, her body shivering for a reason I didn’t quite understand, Aegis curled away from the ball and stood up. She bit her lip, clenching her eyes shut. I could only imagine the pure power of will she summoned in order to overcome the compulsion from the ball. A quick dispel later and the ball was as harmless as Apple Bake’s personality. Aegis seemed to very quickly regain her composure, although she remained as white as a sheet for the rest of the evening. Perfect Measure had elected that moment to be the perfect time to come back from her patrol. Her confused face looked between Aegis terror-stricken and my own frustrated and sweaty face. “Did I...miss something?” she said as she resumed her position next to Aegis. I lifted the ball up in my magic and hovered it in front of the earth pony. “An errant compulsion spell was attached to this thing and caused a riot.” Measure considered the ball for a moment before chuckling. “Doesn’t seem so bad to me.” I shook my head. “Well, this darned thing almost overpowered my defensive magic. Whoever did this has strong magic.” Perfect Measure shrugged. “I expect that you’ll have a full investigation, then?” I nodded solemnly. The three of us resumed our watch, occasionally switching out to do a perimeter patrol. The investigation revealed who our purple little terror was and exactly what it was she was after. The ball had first appeared near the library wing and after Velvet Ward’s suggestion we organised an emergency stock-take of the entire castle library. The missing book, among others, was “Master’s Magical Mind Matters, the Mindful Manual of Manipulation.” Aegis giggled at that - she loves using ‘added alliterative appeal’ as she calls it. A quick glare was all it took to shush her up temporarily, but the constant snickering from her direction was highly irritating and distracting. Little Twilight Sparkle had turned herself in a few days after we announced to all staff the library had been broken into. I recognised the terror from the mysterious dragon attack and would have very much liked to tan her backside till it turned a dark shade of violet, but Princess’ orders were to leave the situation be. I don’t think Twilight realises just how lucky she is to have Princess Celestia on her side. It grates me every damn day, but I have to grit my teeth and bear with it. Aegis Hammer seemed to love Twilight; she thought that the little filly was the most adorable thing in all creation. I wish I could beat some sense into her, but I think I’d crack my hoof on her thick skull. I wrote off the whole incident as a once-off. The Princess had assured us Twilight had received a very stern talking to and it wouldn’t happen again. Sweet, innocent little me hoped that would be the last of her. I was so hopelessly wrong.