//------------------------------// // Help Me I'm Sick // Story: Suicidal Ideation Is Magic // by Shukawarioserfi //------------------------------// I need somepony to help me, I'm desperate. Now I know what Luna meant by my asylum-mates being farther gone than I realize. They won't even listen to me. It must be my demeaner, my passive demeaner only makes ponies feel frustration or pity for me. I don't need their pity. I need to face the problem with courage instead of passivity. I need to speak up. "Why are you upside down?" Bird Droppings asks staring at me from the floor. My head is dangling upside down and my hooves are firmly planted on the chair. "It helps me think. Or I suppose, it hasn't hindered my thinking." I reply. Not really sure whether Bird Droppings understood a single word. We had already finished gym earlier that morning. I wasn't in the mood to get terribly sweaty and gross again. I sat in the corner of the gym the whole time, occasionally standing up to do jumping jacks when one of the nurses glared at me. I'm just glad to be back. In me mode. Passively thinking. And I don't need anypony interrupting me. Bird Dropping's stood up and clapped as an unfamiliar mare entered the room. "Oh it's time for group. Come on Mono." Bird Droppings pulled me out by my hooves and dragged me across the floor. How does she do that? And what in Celestia is group? "I can walk damn it!" I snap. Bird Droppings let's go smiling. "I know, but sometimes it nice to not have to walk every once in awhile." I don't see what's so nice about being dragged across the filthy carpet... Wait. What did she say? It's nice to not have to walk every once in awhile? Discord! I tackle her and pin her to the ground, she gets free effortlessly, and considering how she dragged me across the floor earlier, I'm not surprised. "That was fun." Bird Droppings laughed. "Maybe you should put on some muscle before you do it next time." "Di-" I pointed a hoof accusationally at Bird Dropping before the real Discord peeked out of his office. My face went red. "I thought she was you." I explained nervously. Discord scoffed. "Please, I'm not a changeling. Curse those nasty things." Discord said. "I couldn't change into one of my subjects if I wanted to. That requires a kind of magic that I haven't yet acquired. I've tried eating a changeling, but sadly that didn't help. It just gave me indigestion." Discord burped. "Excuse me." "Your subjects?" I say jokingly. "You don't rule equestria." "Not yet." Discord smirked as he whispered this into my ear, before retreating back into his office. One of the nurses angrily motions me into another room on the other side of the hallway, mumbling something under her breath as I walk in. "I suppose this is group." I say, sitting down in a chair across a round table, and am greeted by all of my asylum-mates. A nurse, I presume, stands up to greet us. "Now since Monotone is new to group I'd like somepony to introduce him to group." The nurse says, eyes darting across the table. Most of the ponies are whistling or dawdling, not willing to volunteer. Penny Rye is the only pony who raises her hand. "Um." She says. "This is positivity group. And this is nurse Plush Minus." "Very good." Plush Minus nods. My eyes dart to her mysterious cutie mark, a very odd plus shaped teddy bear with a toy snake below. She's lime green with a red-orange mane. Reminds me of my other primary caretaker, Copper Leaf. One who my dad adores. "And now." she continues. "I would like everypony to share something positive about themselves." I feel something foreign inside me as she says positive. I immediately raise my hand to be the first to answer. "Go ahead, Monotone." She calls. I answer as if under compulsion. "I'm a good listener." I have no idea how I came up with that one, or why I was so eager to answer her question. I immediately get sick as I'm flooded with anxietes. I lower my head under the table. "Somepony help me." I wince. Now immediately thoughts flood in as I speak again. Did I mean to say that? Something is wrong with me. Thankfully most of the ponies in the room either ignore me or fail to hear me. Only Penny Rye manages any concern as she whispers to me. "Are you alright?" She turns her head and whispers. I groan, not sure if I should say anything. "I'll be better, kay? Give me a sec." I throw up, immediately. Under the table. Surely somepony would of heard that. "Mr. Monotone." Plush Minus speaks in a concerned but disgusted tone. "I think it's time for you to leave." I fail to respond, understandably. Plush Minus leaves to get one of the doctors. "Okay let's go." The doctor says, I'm much too sickly and dazed to make out who the doctor is. I follow him to Dr. Discord's office... Oh yeah, who else. I sit down on the patients bed in disgust. "I thought you were a psychiatrist." I say, annoyed. "Psychiatrist, Ear nose and throat specialist, Gastroenterologist, and vomit specialist." Discord repeats playfully. "And master of chaos." "I'm really getting tired of seeing you." I respond, there's a gigantic knot in my stomach every time I speak. At least if I puke again, I puke on him. Discord hands me a bucket. There goes my master plan. I take the bucket reluctantly. "I wouldn't want you vomiting on me now would I." Discord looks to me smirking. "The only reason..." I groan. "That I am sick is because you keep messing with my mind." "Such a murderous accusation my young pony." Discord snaps. My mind goes blank. "You must not believe that I am messing with your mind, are we clear." I nod. I quickly snap out of it. "Huh?" I say. Immediately confused. I feel sick and I'm now in the doctors office. Which makes sense. Everything makes sense, except how I got here. "I'll make you better okay?" Dr. Discord says, his voice warm and inviting. He pinches my cheek. Now I'm uncomfortable. He conjures up a bowl of soup with his magic and I drink it. Instantly my stomach knot is lifted. "Thank you Discord." I say. "For helping me get better." "You're welcome." Discord says, an evil smile spread across his face.