A/N: Frankly, this chapter was a mistake. If we were you, we would quit now and stop reading any further.
*Falcon Punch* Shove off, GLaDOS! This is my story!
Though she does have a point.
WARNING: If you don't wish to see a fan favorite die or even compared to another character because you believe they are superior in every aspect, please leave now and don't torture yourself. Thank you.
Properties belong to Hasbro, Screw Attack, and Kazuki Takahashi. Oh, and Valve... I guess.
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The Moment No Pony was Waiting For (6)
---Death Battle---
Seriously, how many of these is the director going to make? You'd think he has a better reason than just to kill time. Whoops, camera's rolling.
Clips of Alec Trevelyan, Seto Kaiba, Blue, and various other egotists cross the screen.
B sighs in frustration, "I can't stand it when people talk like they're better than everyone else. Only I can do that!"
W keeps a level tone of professionalism, "Today we're putting two of television's self-centered boasters into the ring."
"Sayer or Divine (in Japan) of the G5 duelists."
"And the Great and Powerful Trixie of the G4 unicorn ponies."
"Do I even have to say it anymore?" B is still a bit huffy about the number of ponies being brought into these battles as of late.
"He's B and I'm W and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle."
---Death Battle---
A man with a look that could kill is shown on screen.
"Sayer is the founder and leader of the Arcadia Movement, an organization founded specifically to gather Psychic Duelist soldiers to exact revenge for New Domino City's discrimination," W says as statistics are shown on the screen.
"He doesn't look black to me," comments B.
"As a Psychic Duelist himself, Sayer is able to make the duel monster cards he plays actual manifestations of what the cards depict. His most commonly used attack is the Spell Card Hinotama, a fireball that would normally deal 500 points of damage to the opponent's life points. His melee weapon of choice is the Spell Card Psychic Sword, an equip spell that would raise a Psychic-Type monsters Attack Power given the right circumstances."
"Wait, when did Yu-gi-oh become Pokemon?"
"Like any other duelist, Sayer carries a duel disk, allowing him to summon and play any of the cards in his deck. So, he's not limited to his spells of preference. While Sayer claims to be anti-discriminatory, he's not against torturing or killing his co-workers and test subjects with chains, electricity, fire, and brainwashing."
"Some 'Divine' guy he is," remarks B using Sayer's Japanese name as a pun.
A clip runs where Sayer whispers the phrase, "The entrance to the Underworld is on the witch's island," into Akiza's ear.
---Death Battle---
The title screen parts to reveal a light blue pony wearing a purple wizard's hat and cape.
"Trixie Lulamoon is a traveling show pony and a master of illusion based magic," W introduces.
"Master my foot," mutters B.
Various statistics appear on screen as W continues.
"As a unicorn, Trixie can perform basic levitation on inanimate objects and living matter. Aside from that, her personal favorite spells include object summoning, rope manipulation, and thunderhead formation. She can also trigger fireworks and makeshift smoke bombs."
"What's so great and powerful about her? Most other unicorns can use exactly the same types of magic with less flashiness and greater effectiveness."
"Trixie can also alter the hair styles of others to the point of grotesque and disturbing conglomerations."
"I mean she exaggerates every single normal aspect about herself."
"Well, B, that's kind of her job as a performer. She has to 'sell' herself to her audience."
"You couldn't pay me to watch one of her half-*ss*d acts."
A clip of Trixie is almost a perfect counterargument to B's complaints as Trixie says, "Well, well, well, it seems we have some neigh-sayers in the audience."
"Rumor has it that she vanquished an Ursa Major with just her overwhelming magic," W adds as a last note.
"Pics or it didn't happen, lady!" B retorts.
The last clip of the blue unicorn reveals her saying, "You'll never be able to match the amazing, show-stopping ability of the Great and Powerful Trixie!" It ends with one of her smoke bombs.
---Death Battle---
Cue W's catchphrase, "All right, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all."
B interrupts, "Hold up, W. I got to go buy more ammo for my baby launcher/kitty cannon."
"Wha...? B! I told you that was a terrible idea."
"But Netflix gave me plenty of money to work with. Gamefly, GoDaddy, and Square Space did too. Right now, it's time for a Death Battle!"
---Death Battle---
An abandoned amusement park appears to be the stage for this Death Battle. From the left side of the screen, a flashy pop-up stage appears as a loud voice resounds.
"Come one! Come all! Come see the amazing talent of the Great and Powerful Trixie!" The blue unicorn pony appears in a veil of one of her smoke bombs. She makes a bowing motion before talking to herself.
"That was perfect if Trixie does say so herself."
"You certainly look the part," says a man's voice. From the right of the screen, the maroon-haired man shows up in an overcoat.
"Let's see if you're of any use to me," says Sayer. Wow, 'says Sayer' sounds somewhat silly... and redundant.
"FIGHT!"
"Hinotama!" Sayer shouts as he plays his spell card in his duel disk. A fairly large, red fireball appears before flying towards the stage on which the unicorn is standing. A cloud of smoke appears before the fire hits the stage and engulfs it.
"Is that the best you've got?" asks Trixie. She has teleported behind the man before summoning her signature thunderhead to cast lightning. Although the lightning connects, Sayer is unfazed.
"Ha! I take more volts than that on a regular basis!" he brags. He summons his Psychic Sword in his right hand. Trixie attempts to manipulate her rope to entangle her enemy only to watch the threads be slashed to ribbons by the man's blade. When he attempts to strike her directly, another column of smoke allows her to change locations again.
"Stop running away, you coward!" shouts Sayer.
"Who's running?" retorts Trixie off screen. A powerful surge is concentrated at the base of her horn as she casts a new spell. Never had she before used object summoning to that degree.
"What the...?" asks Sayer as he is now faced with a 10-story tall purple bear. It's clearly displeased as it charges toward the man before it. It releases a loud roar.
"K-Krebons, stop the attack!" Sayer commands as he shakily plays one of his monster cards on his duel disk. An obscure-looking clown appears but is quickly shattered as it collides with the giant bear.
"Th-Thought Ruler Archfiend! Magical Android!" A skeleton dragon and a sorceress take the field. While they hold for a few seconds longer than the clown, they are both smashed to smithereens.
There's only one target left for the Ursa Major to crush. For once, Sayer experiences fear as the giant paw comes down upon him. The result is not a pleasant sight for queasy stomachs.
With the time diminished on Trixie's summoning spell, the Ursa Major disappears. It returns to wherever it was prior to the summoning.
"Was there ever any doubt?" asks Trixie with her head held high.
"K.O.!"
---Death Battle---
B looks taken aback, "Why are these ponies so awesome?"
As usual, W takes the professional tone, "Even though Sayer has more experience as a leader, Trixie clearly had the upper hand right from the start. While Sayer was able to fend off her more common attacks, Trixie's final cast was able to destroy everything left in his arsenal." The stat screen agrees with W's observation.
"Okay, so she can fight... I'm still not buying tickets to her show."
"The winner is Trixie Lulamoon." A picture of the blue unicorn pony is shown with the bold words "The Great and Powerful Trixie" shown underneath.
---Death Battle---
B announces, "Next time on Death Battle..."
Dark silhouettes appear on screen as various phrases also appear.
Leader
Intelligent
Strategist
Friend
Who is the one?
Shadows of a unicorn and a little girl occupy the screen with the word VS between them.
Credits roll as the hosts thank the viewers for watching.
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A/N: The difference between us is that I can feel pain.
Yeah, yeah, I'm sure you can GLaDOS.
...
Properties belong to their respective owners. I gain no profit from this. You know the drill.