//------------------------------//
// The Cutie Mark Incident 
// Story: The Haven 
// by Original Usermane 
//------------------------------//

	Things settled down once things got rebuilt. But they weren’t just calm. They were… good. Discord made a little leeway with Twilight’s friends, who after the revelations about Discord’s loyalties seemed unsurprised when he started turning up in town almost every other day, usually trailing Fluttershy. Luckily, none of them seemed to clue in on the fact that he lived with her, or that they weren’t exactly ‘friends’ or even ‘best friends’ anymore.
One thing that came from his more frequent presence in Ponyville was his increasing exasperation at the Cutie Mark Crusaders’ inability to see the obvious. One day, after nearly a month, it became too much.
Now that their sisters tolerated Discord most of the time, the CMC were less inclined to run and/or hide from him, so when he appeared in their club house that afternoon, they just gave him weird looks.
“Discord, what are you doing here? We’re having a meeting,” Scootaloo said, trying to shoo him away.
“I know,” he said. “I’m here to get you your cutie marks!” The three fillies froze and their eyes widened. Applebloom even started salivating.
“You… really think you can help us?” Sweetie Belle asked eagerly.
“My dear girl, I’m sure of it,” Discord said, smirking. “But you’ll have to do what I say.” Time for some good old manipulation. If he played it right, the girls wouldn’t even suspect he knew what would work ahead of time.
“Well… I suppose we could use some help,” Scootaloo admitted. “Okay, Discord, we’ll give you a chance.”
“Alright. Well, first problem I see is that your ideas are too over-the-top,” Discord said, lying on his stomach next to the table so his head was closer to eye-level for the fillies.
“Isn’t over-the-top kind of your thing?” Scootaloo pointed out skeptically.
“Well if course it’s mine,” Discord said, rolling his eyes. “But do you really want to turn out like me?” The girls all made horrified faces. “I didn’t think so. So, the trick is to chose more likely activities. Things that you might encounter in your day-to-day life. Those are the things you’ll likely be good at.”
“Like what?” Sweetie Belle asked, confused.
“Let’s start with… oh, gardening or something. There are a lot of those in this town,” Discord said. The first thing they did couldn’t work, or it’d be too suspicious. The girls shrugged and followed him to a likely-looking spot of ground, which he turned into a small garden with a snap.
“So what do we do?” Scootaloo asked.
“Garden,” Discord said with a shrug. “I’m sure if it’s your talent it’ll come pretty naturally.”
Within minutes it became painfully clear that gardening was none of their talents, Discord included. Somehow they’d each managed to kill all of the plants in their section of the garden, via means of overwatering, accidentally digging them out, trying to water them with chocolate milk, etc.
“Well that failed,” Scootaloo sighed. None of them had even bothered checking their flanks.
“Now let’s try crafts,” Discord suggested, looking right at Applebloom. The girls sighed.
“Like what?” Sweetie Belle asked.
“You’re going to build bird houses,” Discord ordered, summoning the supplies.
“What about instructions?” Scootaloo asked skeptically.
“Just improvise,” Discord said eagerly. “We’ll analyze your finished projects when you’ve finished.”
He watched lazily from a cotton candy cloud while the girls worked. Predictably, the birdhouses that Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle were making- or rather, attempting to make- looked like pitiful lumps of wood and paint waiting to be put out of their misery. Applebloom’s, however…
“Let’s look them over,” Discord announced.
“I don’t think I’m getting a cutie mark in building stuff anytime soon,” Scootaloo sighed as her creation fell apart.
“Me neither,” Sweetie agreed. Her birdhouse looked more like abstract art.
“How’d it go with you, Applebloom?” Scootaloo asked, turning around. “Holy-”
“Wait! I ain’t quite done yet!” Applebloom protested, too focused on her project to notice her friends’ reactions. She added the final delicate detail with her paintbrush and wiped her forehead. “Now I’m done.” She turned to see Discord smirking and the girls staring at her.
“Applebloom, that’s amazing!” Sweetie praised. The birdhouse was just the right combination of simple, functional, and elegant. There were three key-hole shaped openings with perches in front, an arched roof with actual tiling, and extremely detailed vines running up the walls.
“Ya think?” Applebloom mused. “I dunno. I coulda done better if I’d had more time.”
“Better!?” Sweetie exclaimed. “How do you improve on that!?”
“Y’all really think it’s that good?” Applebloom asked shyly. Her friends nodded. Applebloom stiffened. “Y’all don’t think that this is my special talent, do ya!?”
“Now that I think about it, you’ve always been good with your hooves,” Sweetie said contemplatively.
“Yeah, like when you fixed up the clubhouse!” Scootaloo exclaimed.
“Or when you made us our float for the parade!” Sweetie added.
“Yer… yer right!” Applebloom gasped. “I never thought about it like that! This really is the kind of thing I’m good at!” There was a flash behind her and she froze. “Girls, did what I think just happened really just happen?” They nodded mutely, grinning widely. Applebloom looked at her no-longer-blank flank.
Her cutie mark stared proudly back at her. It was an apple, predictable when you looked at her family. The stem had been replaced by a nail and the leaf by a protractor, and a paintbrush behind the apple was painting a flower in the background.
“MY CUTIE MARK!” she shrieked gleefully. “It worked!”
“We gotta go tell your sister!” Scootaloo exclaimed.
“No! Not yet! We gotta get you two yours, first!” Applebloom demanded. “We gotta get them together!” She threw on her Crusaders’ cape to hide her cutie mark and Discord clapped and rubbed his hands together.
“Alright, then!” he exclaimed. “Let’s see, next… we’ve tried nature things and crafty things… what about athletic things. Maybe… a footrace?”
Unsuccessful.
“Stunts?”
“What do you mean?” Sweetie asked.
“You know, flips and grinds and things. Here,” he set up a skate park for them and put scooters in front of all of them.
“I have my own,” Scootaloo, said. His vanished and she ran and got her own.
“Why do I have one?” Applebloom asked.
“Bonding with your friends?” Discord suggested. Applebloom shrugged and they all boarded their scooters. Discord put on skates and glided around the edge watching the show. Sweetie fell off within seconds, and while Applebloom stayed on, she was struggling and didn’t even attempt to do anything but move forward. Scootaloo, thought, was zooming around like a pro, complete with grinds, kickflips, and jumps.
“Man, I knew she was fast on this thing, but I’ve never seen her like this before,” Sweetie said, watching from the sidelines by now. Discord had needed to summon up a band-aid for her scraped knee, and she’d just given up.
“Probably cuz’ Ponyville ain’t got a skate park,” Applebloom noted, also having quit.
“Why’d you guys stop?” Scootaloo asked, sliding to a stop in front of them. “This is fun!” Sweetie grimaced and Scootaloo noticed the band-aid. “Or… not for you guys?”
“Not so much,” Sweetie agreed. “You looked good out there, though.”
“Really? You think?” Scootaloo asked, puffing out her chest and fluttering her tiny wings.
“Well, yeah. You’ve always been good at handlin’ that thing,” Applebloom said. “That’s why you’re always the one draggin’ us around in the wagon.”
“Yeah…” Scootaloo said thoughtfully. “I do catch some wicked air on that thing sometimes…” There was a flash. She turned immediately and was thrilled to see a flaming scooter.
“Aw yeah!” she exclaimed. “I can’t wait to show Rainbow Dash!”
“Now wait just a minute!” Applebloom said, throwing Scootaloo’s cape over her. “We gotta get Sweetie hers, first!”
“I know that,” Scootaloo said, rolling her eyes. “I meant after.”
“Wow, Discord, you were right. This is way more effective than anything we’ve ever tried before,” Sweetie said. “You think our luck will keep coming and I’ll get mine?”
“Only one way to see,” Discord said sneakily. ‘Now I just have to stall for a few hours before karaoke hour at Sugarcube Corner...’
He kept the three of them busy washing windows, drawing pictures, even making food, and finally it was time for him to work his final plan.
“Maybe it’s hopeless. It’s just not my time, yet,” Sweetie sighed sadly.
“Ah, don’t think like that!” Scootaloo ordered. “We’ll get yours if it’s the last thing we do!”
“I’ve got another idea. How about we take a break?” Discord suggested. “Let’s go to Sugarcube Corner. My treat.”
“Milkshakes?” Sweetie asked hopefully.
“Sure, whatever, let’s go,” Discord agreed, and they went to the sweet shop, which was currently abuzz with music, with karaoke going on. Pinkie was both the founder of the tradition and one of the only ponies who ever sang, but she abandoned the mic like it was on fire anytime another pony wanted to sing. He bought them their milkshakes and waited until Pinkie was wrapping up with yet another cheerful ditty before planting the seed.
“You know, sometimes I’m surprised Pinkie’s talent isn’t something to do with music, considering how much she sings,” Discord mused.
“She’s energetic, but she’s kinda squeaky,” Sweetie Belle said, looking at the excitable pink mare.
“You think you could do better?” Discord challenged.
“Sweetie could out-sing Pinkie any day!” Scootaloo boasted.
“Oh, I don’t know about that,” Sweetie said humbly. The music paused.
“Well I sure as sugar do!” Applebloom exclaimed. “Hey, Pinkie!”
“What’s up, Applebloom?” Pinkie said, hopping over.
“You and Sweetie, sing off, now,” Applebloom said.
“Ooh, competition!” Pinkie said happily. “You’re on, Sweetie Belle!”
“But-”
“No take-backsies!” Pinkie exclaimed, grabbing Sweetie and pulling her onto the stage. Music started up.
The tune Pinkie started belting out was simple and peppy, and the lyrics made just enough sense that you could follow, but often didn’t rhyme quite satisfactorily. She finished, bowed, and turned to Sweetie Belle, who gulped and started slowly, hesitantly, let out a song she’d actually written herself just a few weeks ago. It was a work in progress, but she felt like she could finish it, now.
Quiet fell in the energetic sweet shop as her sweet voice slowly grew stronger and more confident. She closed her eyes and got into the groove of her song, adding in a bit of choreography. She finished on a beautiful low note that faded out, and the quiet finally reached her ears and she blushed.
“Well, I know when I’m beat!” Pinkie said cheerily. “That was great, Sweetie! Too bad Rarity wasn’t here to hear it!”
“Um… yeah,” Sweetie said, blushing. She hopped off stage and ran back to her friends.
“What a lovely voice,” Discord said again. “You’ve quite a talent.” This time, his words registered with Sweetie Belle in a way that they hadn’t the first time.
“Talent?” Sweetie said slowly. The telltale flash went unnoticed with the re-growing enthusiasm in the room, at least, unnoticed by everypony but those at the table.
“Looks like it really is your talent!” Scootaloo said, pointing at the bell and musical notes that proudly displayed what Sweetie was meant for. She squealed happily.
“We all got our cutie marks!” Applebloom said triumphantly.
“We never could have done it without you, Discord!” Sweetie said happily. She glomped him unexpectedly, and he nearly fell. The other two joined in the pony pile, and then he really did fall over, laughing.
“Well, you’re quite welcome. It was about time, if you ask me,” Discord said with a grin. “Don’t you all have ponies to go report to, now?”
“Thanks again, Discord! We won’t forget this!” Scootaloo said, dashing out of the door.
“You’re the best draconequus ever!” Applebloom added, also leaving.
“I’ve got to go tell Rarity!” Sweetie exclaimed gleefully, and the last of the former Cutie Mark Crusaders left the building.
‘If they’re all going to report to their sisters/idols, then that should help me get in good with Rarity, Applejack, and Rainbow Dash… now I just have to get into Pinkie’s and Twilight’s good books and then maybe we can finally stop hiding things...’ Discord thought. He turned to Pinkie, who was now putting away the karaoke equipment away since Karaoke Hour was over.
“Anything you want me to do for you?” he asked straightforwardly. Pinkie, surprised, paused before screwing up her face in deep thought.
“Chocolate rain!” she exclaimed in a moment of revelation. “Ooh, I want some chocolate rain, please!” Discord was surprised.
“Wouldn’t that bring back bad memories?” Discord asked slowly.
“Are you kidding!?” Pinkie exclaimed. “That was the bestest day in my whole life! Except for the whole ‘chaos lord taking over the world’ part, but the chocolate milk rain was the best!”
“Well, I suppose I’m happy to oblige,” Discord said with a shrug. “Probably best to do it outside, though, so it doesn’t stain the carpet.”
“Okay!” Pinkie agreed, bouncing happily out the door. Discord summoned her her own personal cotton candy chocolate milk rain cloud. He watched in amusement as she sat there happily with her mouth open. ‘Well that was easy,’ he thought. Suddenly, though, she froze and turned to glare at him. “You keep forgetting the whipped cream!” she accused.
“What?” Discord asked stupidly.
“All this chocolate milk rain without a dollop of whip cream to go with it anywhere in sight!” Pinkie criticized. “NOT A SINGLE DOLLOP!”
“I’m… sorry?” Discord said hesitantly.
            “So fix it!” Pinkie demanded, sitting huffily on the ground and crossing her front legs impatiently as the chocolate milk rain continued to pour down on her, forming a puddle.
“Alright, alright!” Discord said quickly, and quickly put his talons up to snap again. He was stopped by an angry voice.
“DISCORD!” Twilight shouted, running and putting herself between the two protectively, horn glowing in warning.
“Whoa!” Discord said, stepping back quickly. “I think there’s been a misunderstanding!”
“What do you think you were doing!?” Twilight shouted. “I thought you were on our side! Why are you causing chaos again!?”
“Chaos?” Discord asked. Twilight gestured angrily to the chocolate milk rain that an impatient Pinkie still waited underneath. “Oh, no you don’t understand! She was asking for it!” He paused and realized how that may not have been the best way to phrase that. “I didn’t mean it like-”
“I don’t care how much you think a pony deserves it, you can’t just go around causing chaos whenever you like! I thought you’d have learned that by now!” Twilight scolded.
“I ha-”
“Just go away, Discord!” Twilight ordered. “And take your stupid pink cloud with you!” Discord sighed at the backfire, vanished the cloud with a snap, and walked off before Twilight could yell at him some more.
“Not a single dollop,” Pinkie muttered grumpily.
“DISCORD!” three angry voices shouted a few moments later, before he’d even managed to get off of main street.
“Oh, what did I do this time!?” Discord asked exasperatedly, throwing his hands up as he turned. Applejack, Rarity, and Rainbow Dash all glared back at him.
“What you did, Discord, is ignore centuries of pony tradition!” Rarity scolded. “A pony is suppose to find her own cutie mark, not have somepony tell her what it is!”
“That wasn’t what happene-”
“Applebloom said you got her friends and her their cutie marks!” Applejack accused.
“Well, yes, but I swear I-”
“What kind of story are they going to tell later when people ask how they got their cutie marks!?” Rainbow demanded. “‘Oh, somepony told me what my talent was’!? Cutie mark stories are supposed to be cool!”
“Well they didn’t tell it very wel-”
“I can’t believe you, Discord! You’ve ruined everything!” Rarity shouted, and the three mares stomped off in a huff, not letting Discord get a word in edgewise. He growled. ‘Next time I help a pony get their cutie mark, I instruct them in how to tell an accurate story, first.’
Now thoroughly done with being in town, he decided to go back home before another attempt at good will was thrown in his face. ‘Why does the universe hate me!?’