The five members of the Mane Six all remained silent in the dressing room, each one immersed in their primping and grooming for the wedding. Their multi-colored skirts brushed against each other as they rushed across the room to get a different eye shadow or pair of earrings to wear with their dress. Of course, getting ready would have been easier for the group if Discord weren't in there, causing a commotion with his horrendous flute playing, which was mediocre at best.
"Discord, will you quit with that?" Rainbow snapped irritably, obviously annoyed at Discord's flute playing. "No one wants to hear your rendition of 'My Heart Will Go On' for the wedding!"
Discord frowned, then put the flute down. "It is my job as Sombra's Best Draqonequus to serve a toast to the bride and groom, and I am merely brushing up on it. Wouldn't want to disappoint, now would we?"
The girls all turned to Fluttershy, who fidgeted awkwardly under their gazes. "Um, maybe you could, uh, do something else? I'm sure you can do something way better than play a flute, Dizzy."
Discord pondered it for a moment, then shook his head. "Nah. I'm pretty cool with this as a toast."
She sighed. "Oh... OK, then."
Suddenly, the door to the dressing room burst open, where Spike stood, panting loudly and heavily. He pressed a hand to his chest, as if checking his heartbeat, then took a couple of soothing breaths to calm down. He straightened up, then rearranged his tipping top hat. "Hey, guys, how's it going?"
Rarity looked up from the vanity long enough to glance at him. "Oh, hi, Spikey. What are you doing here? I thought you were with Sombra?"
Spike twiddled his claws. "Oh, no reason, just came to check on you guys... Not like there's been a disaster or anything..."
Discord arched a brow at him. "Shouldn't you be watching Sombra, making sure he doesn't bolt or something like that?"
"Discord!" Fluttershy said, her tone urging him to be quiet.
Twilight frowned at him. "I don't like your insinuation of Sombra ditching Pinkie, Discord."
Discord rolled his eyes. "You think that every time they get into an argument, Sparkler. Don't be such a hypocrite."
"Discord," Fluttershy said in a more pressed tone.
Spike tapped his fingers together in a nervous manner. "Hey, um, Discord? Can I see you for a minute?"
Discord arched another brow at him, this time in confusion. "Why? You're not worried I'll mess something up here, are you?"
Spike frowned. "Just... Please?"
Discord shrugged, then tossed his flute over his shoulder. "I guess practice will have to wait." He tried to ignore the sigh of collective relief come from the mares, then slithered through the air and out the door with Spike. Once the door was closed and they were away from it, Discord stood on his mismatched feet and leaned down to Spike's level. "What did you need?"
Spike took on a more panicked demeanor, and he began shuffling awkwardly in place. "Um, you know how I'm supposed to make sure that the rings are alright...?"
Discord nodded. "Yeah, I know, so that way Button can walk down the aisle with them because he's the ring bearer. Why?"
Spike looked down. "I think, that I, uh.... I think I lost them?"
Discord's eyes widened. "You lost the rings for the we--" Spike slammed a hand over his mouth, causing the rest of his words to become muffled. He frowned, then detached his lips from his face and put it right in front of Spike's face. "You lost the rings for the wedding?!"
Spike's hat flew off his head at the volume of Discord's voice, which he picked up off the ground and put back on his head. "Well, I didn't mean to! I just put them on the vanity in the dressing room, and now they're gone!"
"Why didn't you tell Sombra?" Discord asked, that being the most logical thing to ask. He rolled his eyes. "Yeesh, you lot are so irresponsible! Why, I remember one time with Fluttershy--"
Spike groaned. "I don't have time to hear one of your crush stories with Fluttershy! I need you to help me with finding the rings!"
Discord frowned at him. "Why can't you ask Sombra or someone else to help you?"
Spike moaned and dragged his claws down his face. "Because, he's already freaking out enough as is! Did you know he changed his tie twenty times in the past hour alone? I don't need him freaking out about me losing the rings, too!"
"What about losing the rings?"
Both Discord and Spike turned simultaneously to see who had spoken, and they both blinked in surprise. "Maud?"
"Yes," Maud said, sounding as monotone as ever. She was also wearing a bridesmaid dress, which was a light hue of pink on the skirt with multi-colored ribbons around the waistline and neckline. The golden crown that wrapped around the back of her ears held inscriptions, somewhat resembling the ones on the Elements of Harmony in Discord's opinion. "Now, what are you saying about missing rings?"
Spike frowned guiltily. "I don't know how, but somehow they're missing--"
"Because he lost them," Discord added on. "Which is why I should be the Best Draqonequus and that be the end of it."
Spike sent him a sideways glare, but continued on nonetheless. "--and I can't find them now."
Maud blinked blankly. "Have you talked to Pinkie or anyone else about it?"
"No, he hasn't," Discord said in a chiding tone, causing Spike to glare at him again.
Maud just looked at them. "I see..." She glanced at the watch on her foreleg. "We still have time before the wedding starts. Let's try retracing your steps, then divide and conquer to cover more ground."
Discord sighed and rolled his eyes. "Why is it when in a time of crisis you ponies feel so keen on splitting up? This is how ponies get killed in horror movies, and that's why there are never any survivors."
Spike frowned. "This isn't a horror movie situation, though. Why does it pertain to us?"
Discord shrugged, then snapped his fingers, causing his tuxedo to disappear and be replaced with an overcoat and his top hat to be replaced by a cheap knock-off of the typical Sherlock detective's cap. "Now, now, Watson, we mustn't question our superiors." He pointed a finger to the sky. "Let us begin the search!" Then, he snapped his fingers and disappeared.
Maud looked at Spike. "Is he always like that?"
Spike nodded. "Yeah, he is. Well, not when Fluttershy is around, anyway... At least, not as chaotic as he usually is."
Maud arched a brow, but all she said was, "I see." She glanced down the hall, then back at Spike. "I can check on the dressing rooms while you check anywhere else you might have been."
Spike nodded in acknowledgement. "Alright, I'll head down to the kitchen and see if I left them in there when I was eating the cream puffs." When Maud gave him what he assumed to be a disapproving look, he frowned at her. "What? I was hungry, and those things are delicious!"
Maud sighed. "I'll meet you soon."
And with that, they split up, stealthily searching for the missing rings.
* * *
Spike let out a groan as he left the kitchen, his search holding no fruit to show his labor. He glumly walked back down the hall, contemplating his next actions and when Maud would return. He saw that she wasn't back yet, and then let out a tiny huff of impatience, then noted that Maud was probably talking to Sombra or Pinkie in their respective dressing rooms and ceased doing so.
"Huzzah!" called out Discord, who materialized in front of Spike, who clutched his heart in shock. "I have returned, bearing the rings!"
Spike blinked in surprise. "Wait, seriously? You found them?"
Discord frowned at him, not appreciative of his tone. "Yes, I did, as a matter of fact. Just goes to show how much better I am at my duties than you are, dear Spike!" He held up two ring hoof-sized rings in between his talons and laughed mirthfully. "Why, I'm sure Sombra will be ecstatic to hear how I found the rings you lost."
Spike looked at the rings, then at Discord. "Uh, Discord...?"
Discord ignored him. "Oh, I'm sure he'll be so grateful, just as he was when I helped him with his troubles with Pinkie!"
"Discord," Spike said again, a little more forcefully.
"Oh, but wasn't that another instance in where you failed in your duties?" Discord peered down at him. "Surely you recall the phrase, 'Never leave a bro behind'?"
"Discord!" Spike exclaimed, extremely annoyed and frustrated.
Discord frowned at him in irritation. "What?"
Spike took a ring from Discord, then held it up for him to see. "These aren't the rings, you nimrod." Then, much to Discord's surprise and horror, he took a bite of it. "This is an onion ring."
Discord looked down at the other ring in his claws, then back at Spike, then back at the ring again. Slowly, he took a small bite of it, and his eyes widened in realization. "Oh. Well, forget everything I said, because it would appear we're both screwed."
"Ya think?!" Spike shouted. "How am I supposed to explain this to everypony?" His eyes widened. "Oh, Sombra's gonna kill me!" He gasped. "Or Pinkie! Oh, sweet Celestia, I'm dead!" He collapsed to the ground. "How am I supposed to call myself the Best Dragon if I can't even do my job right?"
Discord waved a paw nonchalantly. "Oh, come now, you didn't take what I said seriously, did you? I was just playing with you, Spike!"
Spike looked up at him. "You were right, though... I messed up big time, and now it's too late to do anything about it! Sombra and Pinkie aren't gonna have rings for their wedding day and it's all my fault!" He sighed. "And now I have to tell them... Sombra's gonna be really upset with me for this."
Discord frowned as Spike trudged down the hall, a troubled expression on his face and a weight on his shoulders like he walking to his death. Which, Discord pondered, he might be, knowing Sombra and how he tended to react about these sorts of things.
"Oh, I'm going to have to do the right thing, aren't I?" Discord muttered to himself. With a heavy sigh, he snapped his fingers and dissipated from the hall.
* * *
"You did what?!" Sombra exclaimed, sounding just as angry as was predicted. "I can't believe you!"
Spike's eyes widened as he stepped into the dressing room, where Discord and Sombra stood. "Huh? Discord? What are you doing in here?"
Discord turned to Spike. "Come on, Spike, you don't have to feign oblivion. I know you don't want me getting the heat, but I deserve it."
"Huh?" Spike questioned.
Sombra let out a ragged sigh. "I can't believe you lost the rings, Discord! I put Spike in charge of them for a reason, you know!" He put a hoof to his face. "How am I supposed to go through with the ceremony if we don't have the rings for it?"
Discord shrugged, then snapped his fingers, accumulating two onion rings. "How about these?"
Sombra frowned. "Is this some joke to you? I'm marrying the mare of my dreams in minutes, Discord, and you want me to say my vows to her and give her an onion ring?"
Discord frowned at him in an unappreciative manner before snapping his fingers, two donuts accumulating on his talons. "Well, how about donuts, then? I don't think Pinkie will mind."
Before Sombra could open his mouth to tell him exactly where he could shove those donuts in vivid detail, the door opened and Maud entered with Button trailing after her. "Hello, Sombra."
Sombra took a deep, yet not-so-soothing breath. "Hello, Maud. What is it? I'm having a bit of an issue at the moment."
Maud looked down at Button. "Care to tell them what you told me?"
"Oh, sure," Button replied. "So, uh, the rings aren't missing, guys... Don't know why you thought that, but I just took them so that way I'd have them for the ceremony."
"Wait, what?" Sombra, Discord, and Spike said simultaneously in shock.
"Yeah." Button held up the cushion with the rings so everyone could see them. "So, yeah, crisis averted."
Sombra sighed in relief. "Thanks, you two. I nearly had a heart attack for a moment..." He looked back at Discord, a frown forming on his face. "I have half a mind to take you out of the wedding, Discord." Spike and Discord flinched at that, but Sombra wasn't done. "But, I am glad you came forward and that you were honest with me about it. So, thanks for that." He turned to Maud. "Thanks for making sure everything went smoothly, Maud. I think I needed that."
"It's no issue," Maud told him. She turned to Discord and Spike. "Let's go make sure you two are ready for the ceremony, alright?"
"OK," Spike and Discord said together, not even bothered by it. As the three of them left the dressing room and closed the door behind them, they turned to Maud in collective wonder. "How did you--"
"Out of all the places to check, you'd think that logic would say to check with the ring bearer before anything else," Maud told them. "And you two call yourselves the Best Dragon and Draqonequus."
"Hey!" they said, then frowned at each other as they noted the other's voice.
Maud turned around to go down the hall where the rest of the bridesmaids were, then stopped to look over her shoulder. "Keep this in mind, you two: you two might be the best guys Sombra has." She smiled. "But I'm the best mare he could ask for when it comes to a crisis." And with that, she trotted down the hall, leaving the two of them to each other's company.
Spike turned to Discord. "So, you wanna explain why you decided to cover for me back there?"
Discord shrugged. "Sombra trusts you more than he trusts me, Spike. If I were to mess up, it'd be expected. You, however, have far more credit than I do, so you messing up would be far less expected and far more ridiculed because, 'You should know better!'" He shook his head. "Just because you do well all the time doesn't mean that you aren't exempt from making mistakes."
Spike frowned. "And just because you mess up all the time doesn't mean you can't do anything right."
Discord arched a brow. "Was that meant to be a compliment?"
Spike shrugged. "Take it how ya want, I'm just being honest." He checked his watch. "We better get in position, Discord. Wedding's about to start."