Tetris looked out the window. He watched as a seemingly endless row of trees filled his line of vision. Tetris was beginning a new chapter of his life today: college. Tetris was on the express train from Belmont Stakes to Canterlot. Canterlot. It was the city where the royalty resided and was filled with history. Canterlot had always interested the young stallion. Belmont Stakes was a suburb of Manehattan for those who wanted to avoid living in the hustle and bustle of city life. Canterlot and its culture was very different than that of Manehattan or Belmont Stakes. Canterlot was more old-fashioned. It was a city which actually believed in the stories of Nightmare Moon and ghost ponies. Belmont Stakes was more civilized in that respect. However, Tetris could appreciate Canterlot’s devotion and focus on the magic which resided inside ponies – but particularly unicorn magic.
Tetris was attending Canterlot University – the university which had Equestria’s most prestigious magic school. Tetris would have not gone to Canterlot if it wasn’t for its magic school. Schools such as Barnvard and Stableford were actually tougher-to-get-into schools. Both of those schools were closer to Belmont Stakes which his mother would have loved. However, Tetris wanted to study magic. He wanted to know all there was about magic. Tetris was accepted at every college he applied to. He wanted this. He wanted Canterlot. There was something Tetris wanted to prove.
“Are you going to keep zoning off in space like that?”
Tetris was somewhat startled by the noise and turned around. It was only his best friend Bon-Bon.
“Oh um”, said Tetris, “I was just thinking.”
“Are you starting to regret going to Canterlot?”
Bon-Bon could be awfully blunt.
“Nope, certainly not”, responded Tetris with a grin, “this is exactly what I want.”
“If I didn’t get to go to this hoity-toity institution for free, I wouldn’t be here.”
“Super smart Bon-Bon”, said Tetris cheekily.
“Hey”, said Bon-Bon, “I was rejected by Barnvard, but what the hell were you doing taking a magic entrance exam anyway?”
Tetris was certain he didn’t tell Bon-Bon about that. She knew about his obsession with magic but it was basically a given that a magic major was either a unicorn or at least had some unicorn family members: for instance, a pegasus with a unicorn father might want to study magic even though she actually couldn’t perform magic of her own. Tetris was neither a unicorn nor had immediate family members who were unicorns.
“Why would I do that? I can’t perform magic spells, so what’s the point?”
“I got the proof”, said Bon-Bon with a hearty laugh, “see this newspaper I’m holding. On page 26, you are listed as one of three perfect scorers on the MEE.”
“Maybe I’m destined to be Equestria’s most powerful magician.”
“You’re the one that is super smart. You must be the first earth pony to be a perfect scorer on that exam.”
“You would have done it too if you bothered.”
“I’m comfortable in my own skin, unlike somepony I know. On the other hoof, you’re probably the first earth pony to ever take that exam.”
“Who were the other two perfect scorers by the way?”
“Meh, two bitches from Canterlot. You’re in good company. I bet that’s why you want to study magic. Sleep with unicorn mares? I’m telling you though. Canterlot is a whole different animal than Belmont. It’s only been recently that this goddamn university even allowed earth ponies and pegasi to attend.”
“The past is the past”, responded Tetris nonchalantly, “what do you care? Canterlot is letting you go for free.”
“Yea, that’s true. The admissions committee decided that they really wanted an earth pony who lived in a single-parent household, I guess. They probably did a search on your father and realized he was the CFO of some big-ass software company.”
Tetris didn’t like being reminded that he came from a wealthy family, he wanted to think that he got to where he was all on his own. But he would tolerate it from Bon-Bon, she was Bon-Bon and nothing was going to change that.
“You could have just become a comp sci major and joined your father’s company“, continued Bon-Bon, “you’re like a whiz at that shit.”
“I suppose that magic is a challenge I want to partake.”
“In all seriousness”, said Bon-Bon, “I hope you achieve your dream. I am rooting for you – even though it is fucking insane.”
“Well”, responded Tetris with a shrug, “the magic school did accept me. I don’t need to be a unicorn to learn about magic.”
“I’ll be making money and you’ll be doing puppet shows”, said Bon-Bon, “I’m going to start my own bakery and you’re going to get fat from all the treats I make.”
“I sure would”, said Tetris with a smile, “after all, you do have a candy for a cutie mark.”
“I don’t see a unicorn horn or magic-y things on your flank”, said Bon-Bon, “but I know you’ve never been about following your cutie mark.”
Tetris could barely make sense of his cutie mark. It was a red block shaped like an L. The only logical answer he could come up with was that he was good at building things. It was a weird shape though.
“Did you figure out what my cutie mark even means yet?”
“I don’t know”, said Bon-Bon with a smirk, “I’m still trying to figure out where your parents thought of your name.”
“My mom said it came to her in a dream which involved building a house. I guess I’m supposed to be a carpenter. What the hell am I doing in college?”
“You’re a nerd who remembers everything”, responded Bon-Bon, “I think that’s why you’re in college. It’s going to be funny seeing you teach unicorns how to conjure up magic spells.”
“It’s a biological process which can perfectly be explained. It involves faetons which travel around your body – all ponies have it but unicorns are able to channel those faetons to their horns and then it works. The faetons travel…”
“I don’t need a lesson, Professor”, interrupted Bon-Bon.
“Good. I wouldn’t want you as my student anyway.”
“Ugh”, groaned Bon-Bon, “are we almost at Canterlot? It’s too far away.”
Tetris glanced out the window and could see that they zoomed past a sign that said “Ponyville”.
“Almost there actually”, responded Tetris, “we just passed Ponyville.”
“Thank Celestia”, said Bon-Bon, “I can’t stand all of this talk about faetons anymore. Oh my.. there’s a picture in the newspaper of those two unicorn bitches and they look like the biggest dorks of any pony. More dorky than you.”
“Let me see the picture.”
Bon-Bon hoofed the newspaper over to Tetris.
The picture Bon-Bon was talking about was taken at “Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns”. Of course. Any pony smart enough to do so well on the MEE was also worthy of that school – well at least unicorns, thought Tetris bitterly. He made an attempt when he was twelve to get in to the school – but his application couldn’t even be processed since they required a “magic signature” – one which could only be done by a unicorn applicant.
Tetris saw that there were two unicorns standing side-by-side of the alicorn Princess Celstia. The two unicorns were carrying piles of books on their backs. Twilight Sparkle and Moon Dancer. Twilight Sparkle was a lavender unicorn with a multi-colored mane and a deep pink six-pointed star for a cutie mark Moon Dancer was a yellowish gray unicorn with thick glasses and a cutie mark of a crescent moon and three stars.
They were both also going to be at Canterlot University. He wondered what those two mares thought about an earth pony studying magic. By the looks of them though, Tetris gathered that they were so absorbed in their studies that social dynamics were not of particular concern. However, their looks might have been a façade set by Princess Celestia so that her “brightest students” seemed particularly studious.
“They look like party girls to me”, joked Tetris.
“Remember”, said Bon-Bon, “it’s mares like these who are your competition.”
“I might not be able to defeat them in a magic duel, but maybe I can beat them in a running race or something like that.”
“I want in”, added Bon-Bon, “I would beat all of you guys at a race easily.”
“I would like to see you try. I’m as much of an earth pony as you are.”
“You’re a nerd face”, responded Bon-Bon, “I win by default.”
“Oh hush, you’re as much of a dork as I am. What about your crazy ideas of modifying the structures of foods to increase their positive attributes?”
“I’m thinking about money – that’s not dorky, that’s smart.”
“Now you’re going to start flirting with those unicorn mares and take them away from me.”
“Ho ho, that was my evil plan all along. But no worries, I would never want to date one of those high-class pish-posh types. One word out of my mouth and they will think I’m low-class.”
“That is certainly true”, said Tetris with a chuckle.
Tetris didn’t actually think that Bon-Bon was low-class at all.
Her family always had financial problems and never had much money while Bon-Bon was growing up, but Bon-Bon was brilliant. She could be anything she wanted to be if she didn’t let her attitude get in the way.
“The business school should be more tolerable than the magic school. I feel certain about that.”
“Okay, Bon-Bon. You are right. Maybe I should apply for transfer to that school.
“I kind of want to see you stick it to those brats. You know more about how magic works than any of them. Use that to your advantage.”
“If I fail, I’ll bring you over to beat the shit out of them.”
“I would. You wouldn’t even have to ask.”
******************************************************
After a couple more hours which included chatting more with Bon-Bon and taking a nap, the train finally arrived at Canterlot.
Tetris could barely believe what he was seeing. He had been to Canterlot twice on family vacations, but this was going to different.
The road had a silver hue to it – one that screamed that Canterlot was a place of royalty. Far out in the distance, Tetris could make out a tall and majestic castle: that was where Princess Celestia lived. She was worshipped in Canterlot as the powerful alicorn she truly was. Places like Belmont Stakes and Manehattan weren’t as keen on worshipping royalty. However, the Princess was still widely admired in those areas too. Celestia had been alive for at least fifteen hundred years. She was a wise and benevolent ruler who had brought peace to Equestria. Tetris would have been ecstatic if he got to meet Princess Celestia one of these days – something that was unlikely, he wasn’t one of her “gifted unicorns”.
“You would be impressed by that castle”, said Bon-Bon taking Tetris away from his thoughts.
“Wouldn’t it be cool to meet Princess Celestia one day? I have so many questions for her.”
“Manehattan has taller and more impressive buildings than that. I didn’t take you as a pony who was so stuck in the past.”
“I’m not. I’m thinking of the future. Celestia is the most powerful pony in all of Equestria. Her magical abilities surpass that of any unicorn – because she is an alicorn. This also makes her part earth pony.”
“Whatever”, said Bon-Bon dismissively, “except in Canterlot, Celestia has no real political power. To think about it, it’s kind of scary. She’s more powerful than Mayor Stirrup. If Celestia wanted to, she could take away his power from Manehattan. I wouldn’t piss her off, Tetris.”
“Heh heh, agreed. Let’s go enjoy college. I’m sure there’s going to be a lot to learn.”
“Alrighty then.”
Tetris and Bon-Bon took the short walk to the university. The university had centuries of history behind it. There was a statue of Princess Celestia and one of Star Swirl the Bearded at the front of campus. The university was already crowded with ponies. The majority of them were unicorns. However, Tetris spotted plenty of earth ponies and pegasi in the mix.
Their dorms were on opposite sides of the campus. They waved goodbye to one another. Tetris was excited and nervous. What exactly would Canterlot University entail for Tetris? Time would certainly tell.