//------------------------------// // Beware of Passive Aggressive Deer Crossing // Story: Yaerfaerda // by Imploding Colon //------------------------------// Secretary Sharp Quill stood in his office, seated sideways before his desk. He stared straight out the sun-bright balcony, his purple eyes still and unmoving. Behind him, the door opened slightly ajar. A tiny, petite figure shuffled through. With a pensive gaze, Prince Eine stuck his head through the room. He spotted Sharp Quill's shape from afar. Gulping, the little prince trotted through the door, closed it behind him, and approached the desk. “Uhm... Sharp Quill?” The elk did not budge an inch. “Sharp Quill?” Eine shuffled to a stop. He cleared his throat, raising a cloven hoof. “Secretary...” “...!” Sharp Quill's head jerked towards the prince. Eine gasped and hobbled back, trembling. “... ... ...” Sharp Quill blinked. “...Your Highness.” He stood up from the chair and bowed low. “Please forgive me. I did not realize that I was in your presence, my liege.” Eine smiled tenderly and nudged Sharp Quill's shoulder with a hoof. “It is quite fine, Secretary. I know how deep you can get in your wise thoughts.” “I was simply contemplating the best measures for coordinating security with General Saikano during the upcoming Coronation.” “And I appreciate your forethought.” “May I ask why you did not bring a servant to announce your presence, Your Highness?” Eine blinked. He smiled bashfully. “I... I-I never thought I still had to do that with you, Sharp Quill.” “Mmmm...” Sharp Quill smiled gently. “But of course, fair Prince.” He took a breath. “Your father and mother never cared much for pretense either.” The fawn's ears pulled back at the mention of them. He bit his lip and gazed aside. “Does something... trouble you, Your Majesty?” “I... I-I've been following through with all of the tasks laid out for me in preparation for the coronation,” Eine said. “In fact, I have practiced my words and traditional gestures through and through... to the point of redundancy.” “Most ceremonial procedures are, dear Prince,” Sharp Quill said with a smile. “But... but I find myself feeling as if... as if I am wasting time, Secretary.” Eine fidgeted where he stood. “In less than seventy-two hours, I will be King... King of Val Roa.” He shuddered slightly, choosing to stroll towards the balcony looming over the regal spires of the capital's north side. “And with all of the preparation for the coronation procedures, I feel as if something is lacking...” “In what way?” “I-I feel as if I should know more,” Eine said, breathily. “I feel as if more is required of me in order to rule in my parents' stead.” “Wisdom doesn't come overnight, my Prince,” Sharp Quill said, trotting towards him. “It is predominantly learned with experience.” “Yes, and experience is something my father and mother had plenty of.” Eine frowned, his ears twitching in the desert breeze. “But as for myself? I have been thrust upon this task, and I fear that I do not have the tenacity to bear the weight of what comes with being ruler of this land.” “That is to be expected, my Liege.” Sharp Quill slowly trotted towards the fawn as he stood on the edge of the balcony. “And... as I stated before... if you feel uncertain as to your own innate strengths...” He reached a hoof out and gently laid it on the fawn's side. “...I will be there with you every step of the way.” “I'm aware of that, Secretary.” Sharp Quill smiled. “You can rely on my guidance at any time, so long as I live.” “But you must understand! I don't want to have to rely on it!” Sharp Quill raised an eyebrow. “N-not forever!” Eine twirled about. “I know you have been terribly busy with preparing my Coronation as of late, but would it be possible to find some time to tutor me on the proper procedures for meeting with the High Council?” “Nothing would please me more, Your Highness,” Sharp Quill said with a smile. He shook his head. “But your Age of Ascension looms, and there simply hasn't been much time. The Royal Archives—” “I've been reading all of the treatises and rule books that my forbearers bequeathed me,” Eine exclaimed, pacing. “And as much as I've learned, it still isn't enough! I need examples and practice sessions! Or... an actual meeting!” Eine twirled about. “You could set up an appointment with the Council, could you not?” “Your Highness...” “Even if for one moment between now and the Coronation?” Eine smiled hopefully. “I wish to show my strong intent to govern reasonably, at least!” “I would not advise it, my Prince,” Sharp Quill said. “Time is of the essence, and if one simple thing goes wrong with the Coronation, then it could make a disastorous mark on your ascension to power.” “But—” “The eyes of all Val Roa is upon you. And that goes without mentioning the neighboring kingdoms who look upon our civilization as an example of monarchal divinity.” “I... I-I understand that, Secretary. But...” “It is natural to be concerned about the forthcoming events. But trust me. Everything will be fine.” Sharp Quill smiled, resting a gentle hoof on the Prince's shoulder. “You will make a fine King, Your Majesty, one whom your parents will be proud of. I promised them to look after you, and that goes after your kingdom and your legacy as well.” Eine blinked. With a sigh, he hung his head. “And I am m-most thankful for that, Secretary.” “Of that, I have no doubt.” Sharp Quill quietly led Eine back to the door. “Now... why don't you go over those ceremonial gestures one last time. Then perhaps this evening, if I can find the time, I'll go over a rudimentary outline of the traditional Royal Council Review. Would that be most satisfactory?” “Yes. Indeed.” “Now I must continue my preparations. You need not worry about the Coronation, Your Highness. I shall make sure that everything goes according to plan.” Eine smiled, nodding as he backed out of the room. “You are best at planning, Sharp Quill.” He turned to leave, but hesitated slightly. Pivoting, he glanced back into the office. Sharp Quill sat at the desk, turned towards the balcony... and remained still. “... ... ...” Gulping a lump down his throat, Eine closed the ornate doors gently behind him. “You mustn't let the majesty of the West Gate and the surrounding mountains fool you.” Chancellor Fishberry smiled as she trotted along. She and a few other delegates flanked Arcanista's entourage as they strolled down a bricklaid path leading straight through an indoor garden within the Council Building. Water fountains trickled on either side of them while desert scarab beetles clung to the petrified bark of ancient horticulture. “Val Roa is completely open to the the exchange of goods and cultural ideals with our neighboring kingdoms and beyond. It's just that, as of late, we've been preparing for the new King's royal coronation, and... eheheh... I'm certain you can appreciate the need for intense security in that matter.” Kera trotted at the head of the group, her head tilted up high. “Hmmph.” Her emerald locks flowed from a desert breeze wafting through an open skylight above. “Mala'siutshem rehkkarn'm sala'thulasem nessul thriulem.” Ebon Mane cleared his throat. “Her Majesty says that a good kingdom is a strong kingdom.” He turned his tattooed face aside, smiling. “Preserving the Monarchy takes precedent.” “I'm glad that we are in agreement.” Fishberry grinned as she led the grup towards the edge of the garden. “As Chancellor of the Val Roan High Council, it is my task to facilitate political fluidity between the national populace and the Monarchal Family itself. We protect the Prince—soon to be King—by protecting his subjects and their mutual interests.” Arcanista snorted audibly. Fishberry's eyes darted over, though she didn't lose her smile. “Are you coming down with something, Duchess? These gardens have been known to agitate the allergies of those who have been away from the Val Roan capital in a while.” “Oh, don't mind me, Chancellor.” Arcanista smiled back. “I could have sworn for a moment there that I smelled something rotting.” Rainbow Dash gritted her teeth. She glanced aside at Ebon. Ebon cleared his throat. “Tell us, Chancellor... ehhh... will the Prince be attending this Council Meeting?” “Oh, I'm afraid not, ambassador.” Fishberry sadly shook her head. “He is far too caught up in his peparations for the upcoming Coronation in two days.” “That soon?” “Indeed.” Fishberry nodded. “However, for the banquet to follow today's meeting, I'll be sure to have my trusted secretary record any messages you would like to have delivered personally to His Majesty. I'm sure he would be honored to read them.” She turned and smiled at Kera. “And he would be most honored to have you attend his ceremony as well!” Kera stared off, her green eyes wide. Fishberry blinked. “...Your Highness?” “Duaaaaah...” Kera started to drool, her gazed locked on a large cricket that was hopping from branch to thorny branch amidst the flora beside her. Ebon Mane gulped and blurted: “Honorable Princess—” “Uhhh—Dr-Dreit!” Kera jolted in place, clenching her teeth. “I am... uh... Hakuna viktu ka'plah jor'el lok'tar bombad x'hal!” She cleared her throat and struck a haughty pose. “...Xon-Nagu'n.” Fishberry and her dignitaries stared at Kera, then at Ebon. Ebon's pupils shrank. Kera frowned and swatted him with a dainty leg. “Yes!” Ebon grinned wide, his body stiffening. “Yes. Her Majesty Princess Kera Tin Mehjj accepts your invitation! And she wishes His Highness the Prince the best health and prosperity!” He smiled, twitching. “...blessed by Nagu'n!” Fishberry leaned back with a tiny smile. “Quite the dense language, this Xonan.” She took a breath. “Where did you say your kingom lies?” “To the far west,” Ebon said. “Beyond the Frozen Wastes.” “There's rumor of much strife and hostility in that continent,” Fishberry said. “It must be terribly taxing for a kingdom residing there.” “Oh, dreit... dreit.” “I would certainly hope that the Princess' presence here is not compromising your nation's security in a time of dire need.” “Dre—...” Ebon blinked. “Er... I beg your pardon, Chancellor?” Arcanista stepped forward. “You rely too much on rumor, Fishberry,” she said. “That 'strife' and 'hostility' you speak of has come to an end.” “Has it?” Fishberry grinned. “And did you, dear Duchess, summon the Xonans yourself as soon as you caught word of the political stability from beyond the Wastes?” “No, as a matter of fact, these esteemed ambassadors came upon Bountiful on their own, and the House of Sehlp was the only representative willing to lend them a hoof since they arrived from Alafreo.” “Is that so?” Fishberry spoke with a smile. “Perhaps, then, Bountiful is eager to make a name for itself in the Council after so many years of silence.” “The House of Sehlp and its subjects did not choose to be silent,” Arcanista melodically said with a similar smirk. “Bountiful's position on the Council has been reduced to name only, as a result of malicious political strong-legging.” “If the House of Sehlp perceived such indecent and atrocious acts of political sabotage from within the Council, then perhaps the ruling noble should have considered working in tandem with the representatives of their surrounding provinces in order to have declared a public statement regarding the fact.” “As Head Chancellor of the High Council yourself, I imagine it would be a terrible blemish on your record if in some fashion you were to acknowledge the existence of Val Roan political intrigue by suggesting that the nobles of Bountiful take such a direct and affirmative action to solve it, Madame.” Fishberry smiled at Arcanista, ears twitching. Arcanista smiled back, perfectly still. Rainbow Dash gnashed her teeth. Adjusting the hood of her servant's gown, she leaned to the side and stealthily flicked her green tail again Ebon's fetlocks. Ebon brightened. “Well, I think we've enjoyed these wonderfully beautiful gardens quite enough!” He turned and bowed towards Kera. “Your Highness. Shall we proceed to the Council Chamber?” Kera nodded. “Dreit, Ebon Xon-Nagu'n.” “Ah yes, the Council Chamber.” Arcanista glanced pleasantly across the path. “I trust it's in the same place you kept the last time I was here, Chancellor?” “Indubitably.” Fishberry nodded. “Even your seat is still there, should you decide to occupy it once again.” “'Occupy' is such a forceful word.” Arcanista strolled along after Ebon and Kera. “But I suppose it simply comes with making the Council of Val Roa into an Occupation.” Fishberry blinked. She opened her mouth to say something, but by that time the Duchess was two “Xonans” away. Instead, the Chancellor gnashed her teeth. She got concerned looks from her fellow delegates but shrugged them off. In a sulking gait, she followed the royal entourage into the chamber beyond. Eine stood on a raised platform, extending a hoof. A servant squatted before him in his royal quarters, clutching a silk rag in her grasp that she used to polish the Prince's cloven hoof to an immaculate shine. “A most handsome King you will be for Val Roa, Your Highness.” She smiled, concentrating on her work. “It has been a long time since a deer of your kindly youth and stature led this kingdom to greatness. At least... that's what my mother always taught me when I was a wee fawn. We come from a long line of servants, all happy to serve the Royal Family. While the tragedy you've endured—that we've all endured—was most saddening, I thank God for the opportunity to be alive right now and witness your majestic Ascension.” Eine nodded, sighing. “I appreciate your kind words...” “Awwww... why so glum, dear Prince?” She looked up, smiling. “Just think! Everypony you care about will be at the Coronation! And everypony who lives to serve you! Secretary Sharp Quill will be there. The General and his daughter. The members of the High Council. Why... I've heard rumor that some foreign royalty will even be in attendance to witness you wear the crown for the first time!” “Do you mean the Naga Sultan of the Lounge?” Eine tried not to yawn. “Because Sharp Quill has insisted that they not remain for the festivities.” “No, Your Highness! I speak of the royal ambassadors who arrived just last night!” “Royal ambassadors...?” “Aye!” She switched to polishing the fawn's other hoof. “A most mysterious pair of unicorns from beyond the Wastes! From what I hear, they're attending a banquet in the Sandstone District after making a speech before the High Council!” “A speech?” Eine blinked. “Concerning what?” The servant shrugged. “Peace and good will, I would hope.” She giggled slightly. “Too bad, on account of the Coronation and all, you've chosen not to attend. But I don't rightly blame you, Your Majesty. You have a lot to concentrate on at the moment.” Eine's eyes narrowed. He tilted his head down and gazed at her. “...who said that I had decided not to attend?” The servant leaned back, flabbergasted. “Uhhh... erm...” She gulped, smiling nervously. “I-I meant no offense, Your Majesty! I only assumed that Sharp Quill insisted that—” “Is Sharp Quill being coronated the day after tomorrow?” “I... I-I would say not!” “And is he Prince—soon to be King—of Val Roa?” “No sir. That distinction belongs to you.” “Indeed.” Eine smiled to himself, standing tall on his tiny platform. “And so does the decision.” “Your Highness...?” “Fetch a coach. I wish to be escorted to the Sandstone District immediately.” “Uhhhh...” “Are you hard of hearing?” “No, sir! R-right away, sir!” The servant stood up, fumbling. “It's just...” “Just what?” “Should I inform Secretary Sharp Quill that you are...?” Eine tilted his nose up. “The Secretary is extremely busy with planning for the Coronation right now.” He smiled slightly. “It would be most uncouth to disturb him...”