//------------------------------// // Guilt (11) // Story: Song of the Moon // by BlackWing //------------------------------// Guilt I awoke once again. It seems that being knocked out is becoming a common theme. One which I find very annoying. 'Wait, I'm alive? How? I swallowed the silver. I should be ash by now.' I tried to move, finding that I could not. I was still in the silver barred cage, but I was now chained to the wall. I had at least been changed into my final surviving pair of pants. 'Every damn time. What qualm does fate have against me and covering my shame?' "Iron chains in a brick wall? Pfft, please." I pulled with all my might, but surprisingly enough, they did not break. As I felt them, they did not have the same texture as iron. They must be a different metal entirely, one that is much stronger. My belongings were now outside the cage. If I could not access my possessions, what point was there in having me chained? Perhaps to keep me bound while those who could not contain me entered and exited. "He has awoken." A guard spoke to another as I heard the clopping sound of hooves on stone, presumably to fetch one of the princesses. I was correct in my assumption, as Luna made her way back to the prison. "Well now, welcome back." She taunted with a sly smile. "Why am I still alive? I should be a pile of ash by now." "I used my magic to locate the coin and remove it from you before it could take effect." She deadpanned. "I am very disappointed in you, attempting to take your own life. Such is the coward's way." I became enraged. "Coward? I have walked the halls of the damned, played in the courts of vampires, and looked straight in the eyes of the possessed! If I were a coward, I never would have crossed the threshold of Scarlet's court five years past and would not be in this predicament! If I were a coward, I would have given up long before this moment! I am TIRED! I am tired of running! I am tired of hiding! I am tired of....... hurting those who I care about. Tell me, if you had the choice between your own life and the lives of all those you hold dear, which would you choose?" "I would defy fate and chose both." She said scornfully. "More easily said than done. You have the powers of a god, and never ending life. What can I hope to do? I have fought fate constantly, and have lost each and every time. Trying to defy my fate was what led me to find happiness in Ponyville, and look how that turned out." I wept bitterly. By now, news would have gotten around as to what I was. Twilight was the only one who had any inkling of an idea, to the rest, it would be a complete shock. Applebloom, Scootaloo, Sweetie Belle.... Applejack! And Ditzy Do! They all must hate me by now. If I were to return, I'd find a mob carrying torches and pitchforks. "Fool, for all my power, I never succeeded either. The point is, you must continue to try. I spent a thousand years as Nightmare Moon." Suddenly, her form changed. She became much larger, and far more fierce. Her teeth, fangs, and her eyes, slits. She stood right in front of me, glaring at me with the emerald green orbs that mimicked a snake's. I stared right back into them. I had felt fear before, this was like standing before a possessed god, yet I felt no trepidation. I knew it was a show, and there was no evil behind it. I could sense it. "Is this an attempt to break my will, or a test of my character? I have tread ground so cursed that the shadows themselves would grow fangs and claws to massacre the unwary. I too would have fallen had I not been their kin." She changed back to Luna, with a tear in her eye. "Not once have I ever shown this form and others not shaken in fear. That was the form of my nightmare, the one who caused such terror and grief so long ago." "I felt no fear because it did not hold the same evil as it once had. Had it been Nightmare Moon standing before me, I would have had the same reaction. I am a hound, I know evil when I see it. Actually, it's more of a smell. Even magic has a scent, and yours did not change." "Fair enough. The point being, I too know what it is like. To be bound by my own desires. I know full well what it is like, your will is your own, but your personality is not. I was the same, until I was freed by the elements of harmony. The guilt I felt, and my actions had not any permanent damage. Yours....." She sighed. "To have lost your family, such a burden is one I can not even imagine, especially given that you were the cause. So, what will you do now?" She asked. "I can not roam Equestria, as I am still bound by my curse, I can not return to Ponyville, I have already done enough damage and would be welcomed not by ponies joyous at my return, but an angry mob, the only option I can see is for you to return my coin to me." At which point, I was surprised by a sudden pain. I now had a very red hoof shaped mark on my cheek. "Fool! If the only solution you can see to your plight is death, then what of myself? Regardless of what happened in your world, my crimes in Equestria are the same as yours!" She said not with hate, but tears. I stood there silently. I did not have an answer to her question. "I attacked them. I tried to destroy the world. If I had brought about eternal night, nothing could have grown, and all would have frozen or starved. My sins are much greater than yours, yet I have been forgiven! My calamity is still fresh in their minds, but I have been given a second chance! What say you?" She wanted my answer, and I finally had it. "Your threat has passed. Nightmare Moon is gone forever. I am still very much a danger to all who live in peace and harmony. I attempted to take my life not in guilt, but to prevent further calamity. Unless you can think of another, my two options are as follows. One, I can die, or two, I can spend the rest of my life in this prison, which would be no better than the first choice. If you have another way, by all means, DO SHARE!" I was angry. I did not do things without consideration. The fact that she believed I was about to end my life to avoid having to deal with the guilt infuriated me. The point was to prevent myself from causing further harm, not take the coward's way out. "You will do as I say from now on, without question." She looked at me seriously. "And why would I do that?" I spat back. She turned so I could see her flank, her 'cutie mark' being a crescent moon, the same as the mark on my back. She had a sly smile on her face, the one that thieves get when they find a rich fellow with loose strings on his coin purse. "You brand that which belongs to you, and you have branded yourself with my mark. You belong to me, Lark Wolfe. You are my dog, and as such, you will obey your master." Her horn began to glow. The chains binding me to the wall vanished and I fell to the ground. The glow changed from pale blue to pale white and shone upon me. I felt myself begin to change. The pain coursed through me once more as I transformed into a wolf once again. She had focused pure moonlight through her horn and caused me to transform, despite it being during the day. 'I have no doubt that I shall grow to hate this mare, VERY quickly.' I dove at Luna with my now unchained arms outstretched, colliding with the bars and sent reeling with the pain. I was then pinned to the ground by a blue glow. "Bad doggy. We don't bite. BAD!" She addressed me as one would address a pet, using that absurdly loud voice, although slightly more softly this time, I assume as to prevent me from passing out. My ears pressed against my head. She released me, and as I stood, I charged the bars again, once again being thrown back and pinned. "Not a very smart dog, are you?" She giggled. This was FUN for her? As she released me once more, I stood, but before moving, I examined the bars, pacing back and forth in front of them before finally sitting on the stone floor, defeated. "That's a good boy Lark. You aren't a bad dog, you just need to be trained is all. You're supposed to train dogs when they're still puppies, so I have a lot of work ahead of me. Do try and behave will you?" I growled, she scowled. "I'll have none of that, mister." About an hour of 'Sit, stay, bad dog', later, the effects of the moonlight finally wore off and I shifted back to normal. As a side note, the return transformation is just as agonizingly painful as the regular one. Thank goodness I normally sleep through it, except I didn't get to this time. "Well, all in all, I'd say that could have gone better Lark, you are a very stubborn dog. In either case, it's time for dinner. Get yourself dressed and the guard will escort you to the dining room." With that, she left, magically sending my casual and loose fitting outfit to me. After all, it was all I had left. "Hate...... you....... so....... much.........." I managed to mutter as I lay on the ground, still sore from my transformation. After I was able to stand up, I quickly dressed myself, but took a great deal of time for mental preparation before motioning to the guard that I was ready. I looked at the broken remains of my instrument and cried. It had been with me through everything, the last memento of my family, and it was dead. I let out a sigh, the guard noticing what I stared at, before he led me up through the dark corridors of the dungeon and into the bright light of what I assumed to be the castle proper. I was guided through a very large and ornate pair of double doors, featuring the royal sisters chasing one another through their respective skies. There was an absurdly long table in an equally ridiculously proportioned room, with the only seats being taken by the princesses Celestia, Luna, as well as two others, a pink pony with both horn and wings, as well as a white unicorn. I entered the room, where I was motioned by the guard to sit at the near end of the table, quite far from everypony else. "Oh come now, there is no need for that my new pet, come sit over here." Luna mocked. I begrudgingly stood and walked over, sitting beside the pink pony, two seats down from Luna. I remained quiet. "Is that any way to treat your new family?" She asked. "I was under the impression that pets could not speak." I replied with a dead tone. "They may, but only when their master commands them to." Luna explained mirthfully. She was enjoying this FAR too much for it to be healthy. "Very well, I am Lark Wolfe, former musician extraordinaire, and Princess Luna's new toy. As you have no doubt been informed, I am a werewolf, so I'm basically forced to do whatever she says." I had given up on trying to be graceful or polite. I was just plain annoyed. "So then, this, THING is going to be eating dinner with us regularly? I do believe that pets should not be allowed to sit at the table." The unicorn scoffed. "I for one am inclined to agree." Celestia replied scornfully. "Küss mein arsch." While I almost NEVER resorted to profanity, I did have a bit of a habit of cursing in a foreign language whenever I had been pushed past the brink. Well, foreign to wherever I was at the time. A traveling musician is also a wonderful linguist. As I had lost all pretense of pride, I told both the unicorn and Celestia to kiss my ass in German. Thankfully, neither of them seemed to understand the phrase, nor did anypony else at the table. They simply let it slide. "What do you mean 'former' musician?" The pink one next to me asked. "Regrettably, when I had my... episode..... my violin was utterly destroyed. Without that, I cannot play music. It was.... a gift from my father..... before......" I dropped my head to the table, causing a loud thud. "Oh, I'm so sorry. Oh! Where are my manners? I am Princess Cadence. I'll see if we can do anything about your violin. Perhaps it can be restored to it's former glory?" She said cheerfully. "I would..... like that. Thank you." Well, at least SOMEPONY in this blasted castle is civil. She then cleared her throat and I raised my head. The unicorn across from her gave a defeated sigh. "If you MUST know, I am Prince Blueblood. I would suggest that you stay out of my way, mutt. While Princess Luna sees fit to keep you around, I do not need you meddling in my affairs." He finally introduced himself. "As if I have any interest in such things. I have played in the courts of enough nobles to have had more than my fill of such drivel." "Have you now?" He pondered. "Yes, I have. Princess Lu....." The dark princess scowled. "Master. I would very much like if the gold in my coin purse was exchanged for bits, and the amount split, then given to Lyra and Ditzy Do. It's the least I could do, given what I have already done." "Are you sure you would simply give away a million bits?" Blueblood spat his drink, while Cadence giggled. "What use have I for money?" I replied depressed. She seemed to take the hint and motioned to a guard, who then left to do I assume just that. "Ah, yes, dinner has arrived. About time." Blueblood scoffed at several chef ponies who brought food in on, quite to my dismay, silver platters. As mine was set before me, the domed topper still present to preserve the heat until the one to eat it was ready, each of the ponies removed it with their magic before beginning to consume various steamed vegetables. I sat there, glaring at the deadly platter and dome with a scowl. 'Alright, now she's just doing this on purpose.' "Is something the matter Lark?" Luna asked innocently. 'She can't really be that dense, can she?' I carefully plucked a single hair from my head, and the ponies watched in confusion, followed by sudden understanding, as I dropped the hair on the dome and it burst into flames, and then a puff of smoke. "Werewolf. Silver. Duh." Luna laughed before taking the lid off with her magic. I went to pick up a fork to begin eating the steamed vegetables before me, only to burn my hand on it and nearly drop it. I carefully wrapped the cutlery in a napkin before stabbing into a piece of broccoli, taking the utmost care not to touch and portion of the silver to my body, sliding the green stalk into my mouth. Of course, absolutely tiny pieces of the infernal metal were present on the vegetable, causing me to burn my tongue. I gently moved the platter to my left with my sleeve, out of the way, before planting my head on the table once more. Cadence, on my right, looked downright unimpressed with the sisters. Blueblood simply laughed at my plight. "On second thought, I'm not hungry. Master, I'll be in my cell if you suddenly decide you do not wish to starve me to death." I stood from the table and was joined by the guard as he brought me back to my cage. Dark, dank, musty, hard, cold. So much better than the presence of my tormentors. I waited there for about an hour before Luna descended once more. "Lark?" She asked. "So, you saved my life so you could torment me before you ended it yourself?" "That's no way to talk to your master." She scolded. "Master's usually don't starve their pets, followed by trying to feed them poison." I deadpanned. Of course, I was crying. I had never been so humiliated in all my life. I just sat with my arms across my knees in the corner, looking into my hands so that she couldn't see. "I am truly sorry about that. I had forgotten that all the castle's silverware was... well.... silver." She said looking sullen. "Oversight or convenient torture?" "Perhaps a little of both." She smirked. "So, my little doggy, are you ready to try again?" "If by try again, do you mean am I ready to try and bite a chunk out of these silver bars and swallow it?" "You'll never get close, you know that." She said seriously, losing her smile. Her horn glowed with the pale light as I once more changed to my wolf form. Luckily, the clothes were loose fitting, and so they did not rip or tear at all. They were slightly tight when encompassing my larger lycan form. I looked at the night princess, and instead of charging, I just laid on the floor on my side. I didn't feel like moving. I didn't feel like doing anything. Dying. Yeah, I could go for some dying right now. That would be nice. "Well well, isn't this a surprise, only your first day you're already behaving like a good little puppy.