***
Twilight's breath hitched. They were talking about her they were talking about her what was she going to do?!
The scry had been easy enough for a pony of her abilities to cast. She had simply found an appropriate book, and then it was simply a matter of selecting the one she was most interested in utilizing. "Peacock Tail's Argus System" had stuck out amongst them as the safest, as it was easily cancelled (one simply summoned or dissipated magical eyes with which to spy on others) and difficult to trace back to the user (one had to capture the eye, as it was the focal point of the magic).
Working up the courage to use it had been quite another thing. The thought of Celestia catching her in the act of spying on her made Twilight shiver with fear even after months of planning. But it was worth it for a chance to get to see inside her head. All of her friends were open with her, and all of them were free to tell her when they had a problem with her. Celestia...Celestia never told her anything. She was always keeping quiet. Always holding back. And so, by never holding an act against Twilight, she had made Twilight's mind fill itself with all kinds of private fears of what Celestia actually felt for or thought about her. A million and one flaws that might make Celestia secretly hate her, or see her as nothing but a necessary evil for the nation.
Of course, she could never approach Princess Celestia with her insecurities. That would have been insulting. Unfair. Wrong.
Logically, spying on her was the most simple and moral solution for all involved. And so, Twilight was currently in the middle of a bout of likewise highly logical panic at hearing precisely what she had scried Celestia to begin with for.
"Of course, the letters that no longer appear in your mail have been the subject of much discussion around the castle. Ponies are wondering if the two of you had a fight, or if you simply reassigned her. Myself, I think you are getting slack, sister. You are letting your feelings get in the way of her learning once again."
"I don't think there's anything to discuss that we haven't gone over before. You think I let my emotions hold sway over me, and I do not."
The artificial eye widened, taking in all of the light and sound of the room. Luna was sitting with a troubled, slightly pompous grimace. Celestia was smiling, but it was clear that the smile held no warmth.
"She is your student, Celestia. You have a responsibility to educate her without bias, just as you have a responsibility to see her to graduation and see her development into a full pony."
"Twilight Sparkle is a full pony with or without me, thank you very much." There was a snap in Celestia's voice that Twilight had only heard on a few truly terrible days. "Were you more charitable, you might see my not taking her letters as a sign that I trust this is the case, and that I see her as a pony of her own."
Luna opened her mouth to give a retort, but Celestia cut her off with a sad smile. "Do we really need to have this fight again, sister?"
Luna glowered. "Only because the problem continues to not go away."
"Because there is no problem, Luna. I, too, am a grown mare, Luna, and I can in point of fact separate my emotions from my decisions when I need to. What I feel for her," The artificial eye drew closer, "and what I have planned for her are completely separate. And if you had looked at my prior students and their identical lesson plans, you'd know this."
"How do I know you've not simply had affairs with each of them in turn?" Luna was suspicious, but quieting. "Maybe you've had a chain of secret lovers you've manipulated into--"
"Luna!" Celestia stared with a perfectly flat face, then fell into a frown and rubbed her brow. "Do you really think that of me, sister?"
Twilight, for her part, was staring at the screen in front of her with her jaw hanging open. Her mane had already started frizzing.
Luna's eyes cast downward, and she made a token effort to speak. "I--" Then she fell silent, only shutting her eyes in remorse. Celestia crossed the gap between the two, touching a hoof to Luna's shoulder. Luna flicked the hoof away, hugging herself with her wings. "I want it to be. That, or a hidden scandal, or a war started out of passion, or a failure in diplomacy. Something! I want to be able to dig into your closet and see skeletons there. I want to see weakness. Because...what's the point of talking to you anymore if you're just so perfect, sister? After all I've done, wouldn't I just be holding you back?" Luna sagged, turning away from Celestia, and Twilight felt a twinge of empathy.
Celestia's gaze softened, her eyes turning to look down at Luna with upturned brows. "I'm not perfect, Luna. You know I am not, or we would never have been apart." Celestia's eyes searched Luna. She felt a desire to speak building up inside of her, but the speech was one she was never to give Luna. But she knew that if she didn't, this wall between them would continue to grow. That Luna's natural insecurity and her own problems accepting her emotions would only drive them apart again. She braved the speech.
"And you are right to look for my weaknesses, but in finding nothing you have brushed over my greatest one." Celestia swallowed, her wings splaying at the thought of what she was about to say. Like her sister before her, Celestia shied away. "I hide, Luna. From you, from Twilight, from everyone else. I have this...this perpetual fear, I suppose. I am afraid of being hurt. Of being turned against. And, more than anything else, of making things worse by trying to act. I let others act through me. I give suggestions, not advice. I never show what I feel."
"Sister..." Luna reached out a hoof, and Celestia pushed it away.
She squeezed her eyes shut, the pain at last spilling out of her. "It's because of you. Of what I did to you." Her words came out in a hurried whisper, but they flowed out of her nonetheless. "Because I threw myself into what I did before and it turned you against me, made you hate me. Because I loved you and you tried to kill me, and then I banished you and--" Luna grabbed Celestia's head in her hooves, and forced her to look at her.
"Sister." She said it forcefully, but with all the love and power that the word could hold. "If we do not learn to stop this cycle, we will only see it through to its end again and again."
"I know." Celestia gave a fragile smile at this. "I know, and that is why I spoke. We're not the same ponies we were a thousand years ago. We know better. But still, we slip up. I hide the worst from you and you assume worse still, and we only end up drifting. Trust me, Luna. Trust me, and I promise I will share with you. Because I can only trust you if you will trust me."
Luna hugged Celestia back, and on the end of her screen, Twilight stood surrounded by her eyes and sighed. She felt like dirt, having done what she had done, knowing what she knew about Celestia now. She destroyed the eye with a flash of her horn, letting the portal dissipate in a heartbeat. She knew why Celestia had hidden from her, and she knew why she had hidden what she did. She drafted a piece of parchment, her quill flicking but earnestly across the page.
Dear Princess Celestia,
We need to talk.
Love, Twilight