Isaac Clarke
“So there I was, taking the shuttle back after I tried to ruin the marker. I mean, I killed the big bad guy. There was blood EVERYWHERE. Just then, I think I see my dead girlfriend crawl around the passenger seat and she attacks me! I nearly died. After that I was tortured for information and,” Isaac explained. Sweetie Belle and Applebloom looked with abject horror.
“Ahem,” coughed Twilight, “Isaac, can I have a word?” Isaac looked up, the helmet of his engineering rig having been put down for the conversation. He looked back at the two children hoping for an excuse to continue his story. They both told him to go.
“Okay, Twilight. What’s up?” Isaac asked as he walked off with Twilight. Left behind, the two children began to cry. Twilight gave him a dirty look.
“Stop telling your stories. Everypony is getting scared and having nightmares.” Isaac looked off into the distance.
“I got nightmares too, Twilight…. Every night I’d see my girlfriend get torn apart by the necromorphs. I tried to dismember their limbs, shooting recklessly at them. Blood was everywhere, limbs too,” he said dreamily.
“No, Isaac, this is what I’m talking about. You have to stop.” Isaac sighed. Perhaps Twilight was right, he thought. It was hard for him to even approach a window without cringing.
“Maybe you’re right, Twilight, but how am I supposed to get over this? I mean, it’s not every day you have to kill thousands of things that used to be people! I killed them all. I can still hear the screams of the chil-” Isaac’s mouth was constricted with magic.
“Isaac… stop. We don’t talk about this stuff in Equestria. We talk about rainbows and magic and stuff. We smile! Now you better start smiling or else,” Twilight demanded. She turned and walked away. Briefly Isaac felt like mentioning how he got a needle in his eye but decided against it. He walked up to a wall and leaned against it.
“They would have listened to me on the Ishimura…” he muttered. He spotted a pony walking around trying to sell some flowers. He trotted up to her. “Hey you, what ‘cha doing?”
The pony, Roseluck, looked confused. “Oh, nothing,” she said quietly.
“Well… want to hear a story?” Isaac asked hopefully. Nopony ever wanted to hear his story, it was infamous for being awful.
“Iiiiiii have to do some stuff elsewhere. Sorry,” Roseluck said as she scampered off. Isaac frowned. No one ever wanted to hear his story. He thought it was fun and cool, but these ponies were total drags. Isaac slowly trudged his way back to the house he was staying in.
It was a small, two-room affair. Under his bed he kept the tools he had brought with him to this magical land. There was a knock at the door. Upon opening it, Isaac was started to see Scootaloo.
“Hi,” Isaac chimed.
“Hi, Mr. Clarke. Can I hear your story, please?” asked Scootaloo. With great exuberance Clarke picked up the tiny pony and sat her on the couch, he sat next to her.
“Let me start by saying none of this was what I wanted to do. Okay, so I was in this daycare school right? Suddenly, glowing babies are crawling around the walls. So obviously I shoot at them and they die in big explosions! After what must be fifty babies are dead, well, they were already dead but you know what I mean,” Isaac said.
“CLARKE WHAT DID I TELL YOU?” came a scream from outside.
“Uh-oh.” Twilight burst into the room, her mane practically on fire.
“I told you not to tell your story anymore,” she screamed.
“She asked?” Isaac offered hopefully.
“Nope, you’re kicked out. Get out of Ponyville.” Isaac sighed. It was just another day in the life of Space Technician Extraordinaire, Isaac Clarke.