//------------------------------// // Romance is Never Easy. // Story: Shadow, bearer of the element of romance. // by TheRealShadowFoot //------------------------------// i AM AWARE THE FORMATTING IS CRAP. Shadow relaxed happily in the study, finally finding a moment to breathe. He had taken the brunt of the responsibility for the twins, since It was exceedingly rare Twilight had a moment of peace to herself. By some miracle though, they were playing together without making some horrid mess. It would be dinnertime soon, and it was his chore tonight to cook and clean. “I wonder if I could make it a special kind of night.” He wondered aloud. It’d been ages since he and Twilight had done anything together but sleep or take care of the kids. “This is Ponyville. There’s delivery for everything. Especially if you know a certain alabaster unicorn or party pony.” After making sure the twins were OK, Shadow penned out a couple small letters and paid two colts to deliver them to Rarity and Pinkie Pie, hoping they got back to him before Twilight got home. With his plan in motion, Shadow began searching the modest kitchen for anything even roughly romantic. “Hmm...Spaghetti, bread, garlic powder, veggie sauce….close enough!” He laid out all the components on the counter, taking stock once again to be sure. He got a pot of water going on the stove, and had just unboxed the spaghetti noodles when the front door opened and he heard a familiar purple dragon. “Shadow, Twilight? hello?” Spike yelled, stopping to entertain the little ones for a split second. He trotted to the door, and who should he find, but Shadow, slaving over the stove. “Hey Shadow, what’s up?” “Nothing, Spike. Just a bit of a surprise for you know who.” “Who?” “Twilight.” “Really? Whatcha doing?” “Romantic Dinner for the two of us.” “That’s cool. When is she supposed to be back?” “I have no idea...wanna make a few bits and visit Rarity to boot?” “Rarity who what..?” “I have a simple task for you. Go find Rarity, make sure she has the flowers I asked for, bring them here if she does.” “Easy enough.” “Also, keep Twilight distracted if you see her. for like 45 minutes.” “Also easy enough. The Book Shop it is.” “Here.” Shadow tossed a few bits Spike’s way. “After your mission is accomplished, get yourself some new comics or something. Take Star and the Crusaders out to get ice cream if you feel keen on it.” “Yes, Sir!” Spike comedically saluted and dashed off. “Heh, killed three birds with one stone. Spike’ll be distracted by Rarity or his comics, I’ll have my flowers, and Rarity will keep Twilight distracted if Spike doesn’t. Damn I’m good.” Shadow snickered to himself. “Now for Dessert. If I know Pinkie….” The doorbell dinged several times in rapid succession. “That was actually, kinda creepy.” Shadow answered the door. Pinkie and her trademark pink afro were quivering with energy as usual. “Pinkie! Just in time!” Shadow said, gagging as Pinkie crushed his spine. “I’m soooo happy to make some romantic desserts for you and Twilight, Shadow! you guys could really use the time to do all the romantic things! And I never have a reason to not babysit the twins! I love them to little bitty pieces! “I know, Pinkie, trust me I know….” Shadow said, coughing. “How long are you guys gonna need to do romantic things?” “Couple hours, maybe. The twins have been pretty reasonable today. They shouldn’t give you much problems.” “It’s OK, I can handle it. I’ve been babysitting the Cakes all week so I’m confident I can do it.” “Good to hear. Everything should still be packed and refreshed from last time, so they’re all yours.” The twins giggled happily as they tasted each other’s manes. Shadow leaned over, nuzzling his kids as Pinkie lifted them out of their play zone. “Daddy’s gonna miss you guys. Behave for Aunt Pinkie, okay?” They giggled, grasping his muzzle at the same time. “God, that’s too adorable. I almost wanna keep you guys now.” Nuzzling them again, they waved at him as Pinkie left, shutting the door behind her. “Okay, cheftime!” +++ Meanwhile, back in town…. “Spike, where’d she go? I can’t seem to find her anywhere.” Rarity said, placing a foreleg above her eyes. “Neither can I...Shadow’s gonna be heated if she gets home before it’s ready.” “Let’s find her then. You check the quill store. I’ll go to the Bakery. We know she can’t resist a good cinnamon bun.” “Are you sure you don’t need me to go with you? as another pair of eyes. Looking out for Zombies or something?” “You’re sweet, but I can handle myself. I’m a grown mare.” “OK...I’ll go this way, then.” Spike said, kicking a rock. “There’s a good gentledrake.” Rarity dashed off, checking every store window she passed. “Stupid baby dragon thing.” Spike grumbled to himself. But he would do anything to make Rarity happy. That was really all that mattered to him. Just then, he heard a familiar voice. “Twilight! There she is!” He found her next to the Apple Stand, making Idle conversation with AJ about the crop this season. “...and how are those new soil additives working out for you?” “They’re Great, Twi! I’ve never seen such big, juicy apples since I was a filly, when my parents were maintaining the Farm.” “I told you that all that cow manure would work wonders for the soil. You just can’t argue with tried and true practices.” “Well, it did occur to me to use it, but I never have any help with the crops except Big Mac...and he’s kind of girly when it comes to cow poo.” “That’s weird, but then again, everypony has a quirk or two.” “Don’t I know it. Still, the Crusaders I would have never expected to help. But apparently they ran out of ideas for once.” “So it would seem.” Twilight laughed. “ Anyway Twi, I wantcha to take a bushel of apples for the treehouse. You helped me grow them, so I think you should share in the spoils.” “I couldn’t, AJ. Put them towards your profits.” “You need to help keep them young’uns healthy. Take them for that at least.” “As Stubborn as ever, I see.” “You know it.” They laughed together, and Twilight snacked on one as she was leaving. Spike intentionally bumped into her. “Hi Spike, what are you doing out here? I thought you were helping Rarity today?” He laughed nervously, standing up and dusting his scales. “She decided to umm….go home and...work on more gala dresses or something. Yeah, that’s it.” “Funny. Normally you take any chance you can get to help her.” “I had to um...come find you...so I can show you some new books I found at the store.” “Really? They’ve gotten brand new stuff already? I was just there today, and ordered some. Did you find any you liked?” “Uhm...no, not really….how about we go to the comic shop? I heard there’s a new Daring-Do Short Format coming in this afternoon.” “Spike, I’ve been pretty much everywhere. I want to go home and see my family.” “You can’t!” Spike shouted. “And why not?” Twilight asked, getting irritated. Occasionally, Spike would get like this when he felt he wasn’t getting enough attention. “Because….because….” Spike faltered, almost in tears. “Listen, Spike. I know you want to be one of the big ponies, but you’re still young. Please just let me go home..” Spike sniffled. “Okay Twilight. But first...how about a Cinnamon Bun? Fresh from Sugarcube corner?” Twilight sighed, but decided to humor her favorite little assistant. “Okay Spike. One cinnamon bun, then we both go home. Okay?” “No Problem, Twilight!” Spike shouted gleefully. “We’ll even order them fresh from the oven!” “Really huh? And who’s paying I wonder?” Twilight giggled. “I am! I earned some bits for making some deliveries this afternoon!” “Did you now? And you’re spending them on me?” Twilight asked jokingly. “Well yeah. You’re always buying me stuff So, I wanted to do something nice for you.” “Aren’t you the proper gentledrake? I’m impressed. It seems Rarity is rubbing off on you.” “I’ll say. Come on! let’s go before they shut the ovens down.” “Ok Spike, okay.” He grabbed her hoof and led her away. “This should definitely buy enough time for Shadow to finish up.” Spike thought to himself. ++++ In the treehouse, Shadow was a bit of a wreck. He had overcooked the pasta, the sauce was still cold, and the garlic bread wasn’t cooking right. “Ye gods above,spare me these trials, I beg of thee!!” He shouted at the ceiling, hoping it would listen. He couldn’t tell and really didn’t care if they listened. “Well, if nothing else, I get an A for effort.” He grunted, frowning at the coagulated mass of red goop on the table. “Whatever...I’ll at least earn a kiss or two.” He facetabled, grabbing at his mane. +++ Faraway in the halls of the Royal Castle, Luna felt a disturbance in the ripples of emotional energy surrounding ponyville. “It seems somepony needs a bit of a hoof, Sister.” Celestia said, noticing the shudder emanating from the Lunar Matriarch. “You felt it too?” Luna inquired. “Yes, but if I chased after every weird ripple in the ‘verse, I’d be a much busier princess.” “Well, you’re not busy now.” “Neither are you.” “For shame, Dear Sister. How can we not help a pony in need? “By ignoring it.” Celestia grunted. It was that time of the month for her. She didn’t like it. “And speaking of shame, do I need to remind you of that young stallion behind the barracks?” “Hey! he was cute!” “And you’re a princess.” “Really, Princess Sunbutt? how about that cake that “disappeared” last week? “Pics or it didn’t happen.” “How about I show you the pics then?” “You wouldn’t!” Celestia blushed, trying to magically snatch the incriminating photos. “I would. And I would enjoy it as much as you enjoyed that cake.” Celestia snorted. “Fine, go help your little ripple. I can’t guarantee you won’t have itching powder in your bedclothes when you get back.” “Just like I can’t guarantee the Canterlotian tabloids will not “acquire” these pictures.” “You win, little sister.” With a flash of midnight sky, Luna dissapeared. “Stupid little sisters and their stupid cameras.” Celestia made a slice of vanilla cake appear in front of her. “Least she can’t see me now.” The rest of said cake appeared on the bedside table. +++ In a flash of moonlight, the Lunar Matriarch appeared outside of the treehouse, just as the sun was setting. “Twilight Sparkle, huh? Wonder what she could be going through that she needs my help.” She let herself into the Treehouse, after not receiving an answer at the door. Who else should she find but Twilight Sparkle’s husband, about to throw away what seemed like a perfectly good spaghetti dinner. “You know Twilight would hate you for wasting food like that.” “Princess!” Shadow squeaked in a very girly fashion, almost spilling the ruined supper on himself. What brings you to my humble home, your Lunar Highness?” “You. For some reason I was compelled to come see what had happened. And whom should I find but you?” “Nothing happened, your Majesty. Just some failed romancing of my lovely wife.” “How so? You seem to have a perfectly good dinner in your hooves.” “Taste it.” “I shouldn’t. What about Mrs. Sparkle?” “She’s not here. Yet.” “Very well. I’ll have you know I’m immune to most bad tastes. The Solar Princess has no talent for catering.” “It’s not poisoned. Just disgusting.” At this, she tested the slop. “Hmm...well that….is unique. It tastes like spaghetti and smells like the guard barracks.” “And there you have it. How do I fail at one of the simplest meals ever?” “I know not, but I can fix it. On one condition.” “Aye?” “You hide these from my Sister.” Luna pulled out a simple white envelope. “What’s in here? It’s kinda heavy and thick.” “That concerns you not. And should you open it without my consent, you will have a most unpleasant time ahead of you. Savvy?” “Fair enough.” “Very well.” Luna’s horn began to pulse with the blue of midnight, and the table and everything upon it began to sort itself out. The table was suddenly set as if by a professional caterer, the slop now turned into a steaming, gorgeous plate of spaghetti, just enough for two. After that, slender white candles in brass holsters appeared, one upon each side of the room. The room dimmed, soft music began emanating from the once-broken phonograph, and lavender roses appeared in glass vases, near enough to the candles to be visible, but in the near perfect center of the table, 6 in each vase. Shadow was flabbergasted. His vision was reality, as if the Princess had pulled it directly from his mind’s eye. “How did you…?” “Princess. Duh. Do you agree to my terms? “Certainly. I’ll bury them in the attic, away from curious minds and grabby hooves.” “And If I should return for them?” “Don’t ask, don’t tell.” “I hereby take my leave, Mr. Shadowfoot. The rest of the magic is your own to achieve.” “Thank you, your grace.” And in a flash of midnight, She was gone. Just as the last wisps of magical vapor dissipated, Twilight had walked in. +++ “Hey honey, how was your day?” Shadow approached his ever-beautiful wife, nuzzling her. “It was great. How about yours?” She kissed him, leaving her bags near the door and making her way to the Twins’ play zone. “Oh it was fine..” Shadow chuckled. “If she only knew” He thought to himself. “Where are the twins?” Twilight asked, establishing they were indeed gone. “Pinkie took them for the night. Said she missed them.” “Really now? How about Star and Spike?” “Well, Spike said something about going to hang out with the Crusaders for a bit. Decided to take Star with him.” “That’s....convenient…” Twilight said, sensing something amiss. “Is it now? I had no idea. I wasn’t worried about it too much. Those things aren’t uncommon.” “Well, no, but at the same time…” Then she realized what was amiss. “What are you up to, sneaky little colt?” “Up to? Whatever could you mean, my love?” Shadow said innocently, walking into the dining room. “I mean, suddenly Pinkie takes the kids, even though she sees them every day. Then Spike and Star actually hanging out together, upon Spike’s own volition? Normally he goes to the comic shop and leaves Star with the crusaders.” “It could be that I was busy setting this up.” Shadow escorted his wife into the dining room. What Twilight saw, she almost couldn’t comprehend. Glittering brass candelabrum were on each of the walls, The very center of the room transformed into a romantic table setting, complete with her favorite lavender Roses. An exceptionally rare variant grown only by the most talented florists. And a Dozen of them to boot. Not even magic could make such a lovely breed of flora. “Shadow...this is...wow….how did you manage all this? With the twins no less?” “Let’s just say I have a friend who moves in mysterious ways.” He smiled, pulling her stool out for her. “Really now? Anyone we know?” She said, exaggerating the “we”. “Now, now. A magician never reveals his secrets.” Shadow said slyly, silently thanking all the people who helped put this together. “You are a sneaky pony. But that’s one of the reasons I love you.” She said, kissing him as he sat down. They laughed and talked all night, enjoying the rest from the normally crazy life they lived. After dinner, Shadow had cleared the table and cleaned the mess he had made, while Twilight was off doing her own routine. That night, they went to bed early and slept late, until their life had restored itself back to its normal chaos. +++ And thus, Shadow’s plans had come to fruition. Where the night led after supper, not even I know. But sometimes, all it takes is a little romance to realize how much you truly love somepony. Thick and thin, pleasure and pain. Those strong enough to cope with the difficulties life brings, often turn out to be some of the closest, most romantic couples in existence. If only every story ended this way.