//------------------------------// // Button Gnash // Story: Final Mashtination // by Rinnaul //------------------------------// Button woke with his alarm, rolling out of bed just before the axe hanging above it would have struck his chest. Sitting on the floor next to the bed, he yawned and rubbed his eyes before making his way to the door of his room. Taking a deep breath, he carefully turned the knob until it was only just open, and then pushed it the rest of the way in one solid motion while standing with his back flat against the wall at one side of the door. There was a loud crash as a falling safe obliterated the floor just outside his room, followed by a rumble and a thud as a bowling ball rolled down a chute and slammed into the floor just a few paces from where he stood. He smiled again at having defeated the devious trap, and leapt across the gap in the floor to land in the hallway. Whoever was targeting him was clearly a devious and sinister sort of pony. He’d have to be prepared for anything to survive this. And so, his first stop was the bathroom. After all, with so many sudden attacks, it was only a matter of time until one startled him into doing something embarrassing. Might as well empty his bladder under controlled conditions, first. He closed and locked the bathroom door behind him. No point in risking somepony bursting in to take him out on the toilet. The bathtub was full, but he decided to stay clear of it, just in case the liquid was actually acid or something. With how his morning had gone so far, that seemed the most reasonable assumption. A quick check of the toilet to ensure there were no traps there, and he finally got down to “business”. However, while he was washing up (lest he suddenly die from some sort of toilet-borne infection in the killer dungeon that had taken over his life), he heard a splash and a low growl from behind him. Spinning around, he saw a full-grown alligator between himself and the door. “What.” Unfortunately, he was unaware that Pinkie Pie had borrowed their bathroom to serve as a temporary home for one of Gummy’s toothed and pony-eating cousins. “WHAT?!” He could only shout in disbelief as the gator lunged at him— “THIS IS SUCH HORSEAPPLES!” —tore him to pieces, and devoured him. Would you like to play again?