//------------------------------// // The Super Rushed and Crappy Quality Halloween Special Extravaganza! *Warning: I'm not even trying for this chapter. I am LITERALLY typing random, incoherent crap, hoping for the best.* // Story: But I AM Evil! // by TheNextGamer //------------------------------// Is Nightmare-Night. Yaaay. Once upon time, Twilight got toilet clogged. She checked inside and found Connery NotEvilGuy. DUN DUN SCARY DUN. "Finally! My greatest creation is now complete! Michael-bot, activate Thriller-night!" I press button, yes. Jacket wearing ribbit grabs crotch and spins indefinitely. "Heehee OH Heehee OH Heehee OH Heehee OH Heehee OH Heehee OH-" "NOW GO! DANCE YOUR WAY INTO THE LIVES OF OTHERS!" "And that'll be two bits!" *insert candy-apple exchange here* "Thank'ya kindly! If you got a sweet tooth a-comin', ya'know where to find me- What in tarnation?" Cue Jackson-bot spinning in her direction. "Heehee OH Heehee OH Heehee OH Heehee OH Heehee OH Heehee OH" "-so then he *bleep* and *bleep* her into oblivion, all the while using a *bleep*, screaming out 'YES, YES, YES.' The body of the girl was never found, and the only evidence of it happening was all of the *bleep* spilled across the walls and floors and pavement in the house....es. The End." I closed the book, and looked up to see the faces of many horrified, jaw-slacked little fillies and colts. One raised his hoof, "What's a twinkie?" He asked curiously. "Something that keeps the way of life flowing." The flying horse carriage landed with a soft thud. Princess Luna stepped out, her night and starry mane, flowing with the some-what non-existent wind. She gave a happy, nostalgic smile, finally able to return to Ponyville to celebrate another Nightmare Night festival. She breathed in, and prepared hew royal, and regal Fancy Royal Speak voice, with included We's and Us's. "We have returneth for another night, for the celebration of Nightmare Ni- Ow- ow- what- ow- ouch- ow- what in the world?!" "Keep throwing candy at her, or else she'll devour us all! If she eats enough, she'll get fat and slow, and we'll be able to out-run her!" I chucked another chocolate bar at her. "You do know, that's just a tall-tale for the foals, and she won't actually eat any of us, right?" Twilight asked me, in her Evil Scientist costume. "Pfft, like hell I'm gonna take any chances! The whole time I've been here, every single prophecy, myth, and/or child's tale I come across, they all turned out to be real, and the next thing I know, I'm already halfway inside the mouth of Dracula!" "I still don't believe you when you said that you met and fought Dracula that day." "I CARRIED HIS FUCKING DECAPITATED HEAD BACK WITH ME, WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT?!" "Sooo... what's a pretty little thing like you, doin' in a place like this?" "Heehee OH Heehee OH Heehee OH Heehee OH" "Oh yeah? Sounds like a nice, quiet place. Neighbors seem friendly." "Heehee OH Heehee OH" "Hm, speaking of nice and quiet places... are you DTF?" Heehee NO." ... "Damn." "Hey." "Yeah?" "You... ever wonder why we're here?" ... "No. I don't ever wonder why we're here. Semper Fi, bitch." "Dear Celestia..." Said random bystander. In front of him, a bunch of trees float without their middle part of the tree. "Floating trees everywhere!" Exclaimed random bystander. "BLAHG" He screams in sheer terror. Meanwhile, Rainbow Dash and Connery cover their snickers away, hiding in the shadows nearby. "So this is your... newest creation?" Luna asked, as she closely observes the MJ-bot. "Heehee OH Heehee OH" It continues to sing and spin and grab it's non-existent crotch. "It's so... strange, is the word, I guess?" "Hey, you shouldn't judge it for how it acts!" I scolded. "No-no, I didn't mean it like tha-" "You should judge it by how it DANCES! Minion-bots, hit the music!" Two minion-backup-dancer-bots walk up behind MJ-bot, and got in dancing positions. "HEEHEE HEEHEE OH OH OH, OH HEEHEEHEEHEE OH," Walking man shuffle. "HEEHEE OH HEE HEE OH OH, HEEHEE OH OH OH," Moonwalking. "HEEHEE HEEHEE OH OH OH, HE OH OH OH OH," Violently grabs crotch and spins indefinitely for the rest of the song. "WHAT IS GOING ON?!" Random bystander yelled. "Blah!" He screams, pointing at a mailbox. "Blahg!" He screams, pointing at a cat. "BLAGHAFLAGAH" He screams, pointing at a rock. "Erm... Ok, this is starting to get really freaky. Is there something wrong with this guy?" Rainbow Dash said, uncomfortable by the stallion's strange actions. "BLAHGAHFRAGLAHSHACKALACKAPUDDIN" Random bystander screams, sprawling his hooves all around. "... Yeah, I think this guy is on drugs... like... heavy amounts of it. Tons of it." "ABLAHMASFAHGAHTAGASMA- ....." Random bystander suddenly goes limp on the ground. ... "Woah, is he... is he dead?" "Hm... let me check..." I walked up to the strange guy. His eyes were still wide open, pupils dilated, with his tongue outside of his mouth and on the ground. I poked him, "Hey, buddy. You ok?" No response. I glanced at Rainbow Dash, "Yeah, no, I think he's dea-" "BLAGFLAH" "JESUS FUCK" Celestia sipped her tea peacefully, patiently waiting for Luna to come back from her visit to Ponyville. As she sits by the warm fire of the main living room place thingy in the palace, she hears the doors open. She smiles, and asks, "Ah, Luna. How was your time back at Ponyville? Fun, I ho-" "TIA, LOOK, I FOUND A NEW FRIEND!" "Heehee OH Heehee OH Heehee OH Heehee OH" Damn you Connery.