Living The Dream

by Kickass222urmom

The true story of Alexander

That... That was awesome!

[YOU'RE DAMN RIGHT IT WAS AWESOME!]
<Totally proves we're not gay.>

I was laying in my bed, Twilight's head on my chest. I was currently looking at the ceiling, a large goofy smile on my face.

What? You would to after something like THAT.

But, only one thing ruined the moment at one point. A letter appeared in front of me as I leaned down to lick.... never mind, you get the idea.

Anyways, a letter from Graze appeared before me, and ruined the mood for a good four minutes. Thanks a lot Graze!

I read it quickly, wrote out a response, and then instantly jumped back into bed to finish what I had started.

This is what the letter had read:

'Yo Lance! I'm real happy for you with Spark and your daughter, but Vine as well?! Jeez, I know that mare, and guess what? She loves to be booped on her nose, she just giggles like a filly when you do that. Totally tickles her fancy and colors her pretty. Trust me man, she would become your best friend forever. I did it and we got coffee and everything! Life was fucking grand except for the fact that I got dumped recently..... Reasons withheld, I just hope things with Ditzy and I fix quickly. Can't stop thinking about her, but anyways, I have to go now, preparing for something big and also, somepony be knocking on my door.

Also, I am a Godfather to Anarchy, my philosophical teacher, she is one crazy draconequis but life couldn't be more epic without her and other teachers!

Ciao for now!

Brother from another mother,
Razor Fucking Graze.

P.S - I have a new conscience meaning a better form as well. Sadly with a lot of thinking, you got yours by magic right? That's kinda short cutting it but anyways, when I come get ready to meet her, she can honestly pussywhip Kill, so I would be afraid. Very afraid.'

I had to admit, I laughed despite myself. Also, I know what I'm doing after I get out of bed. I'm gonna boop her on the nose later.

This should make her forgive me for that... incident with the prank gone wrong. Also, coffee does sound nice, and it could be fun to have her a best friend.

And, maybe she won't play anymore pranks on me. Yep, this is going to be awesome!

Now, after reading that, I wrote out a quick letter and sent it back to him:

'What's up Graze? I'm kinda in the middle of something, so, this will be short.

Really? Just boop her on the nose and she'll do all that? SWEET! I can finally stop worrying if she'll prank me again. With this information, I can make her my best friend and no longer fear her! Thank's bro!

I'm sorry about that bro, she'll come back.... Break says to buy a hooker, but, Dawn suggest trying to talk the problem out. I on the other hand suggest you give her some time. She'll come around.

That's disturbing bro, because I know her. And let me tell you this, if she says she'll fix your problem, don't listen. Trust me on this one.

New conscience? Cool. Also no, I didn't get my new form by magic. Here, I'll describe this as short and fast as I can.

I'm no longer a pony or human, I'm an angel. If you don't know what that is, then ask somepony who knows about this kind of stuff. How did I become one? Simple, I died. How did I die? I was protecting Twilight from something called The Nightmare. No, he did not kill me. I sacrificed myself to save her. I'll tell you more later, if you ever come back.

From the brony who's currently getting some!
Lance'

<So, when are we going to do this? The Vinetion thing I mean.>
{Soon, after I enjoy a few more minutes of holding Twilight.}
[Well, hurry up! I want to stop worrying about what Vinetion will do next!]

Alexander sat in front of his mirror, looking at his eyes.

He sighed, pushing the memories back down. But every time he did, they would come back up, stronger.

It was becoming to much for him to handle. All those months... he shuddered at the thought.

The door to the room opened.

He quickly pulled on his goggles and looked towards the door.

Trixie trotted in with a large smile and jumped into the bed and laid down behind him, "Trixie is tired after today's events. She wishes for her stallion to hold her."

Alexander smiled weakly and shifted his position and laid next to her. He then wrapped his forelegs around her and pulled her close.

Trixie rubbed her cheek against his and relaxed.

After a few moments of silence, Alexander accidently let out a whimper, a whimper caused by his painful memories.

Trixie pulled back and looked at him, "Alex? What's wrong?"

He couldn't take it anymore. Tears began to pour out from under his goggles, staining the pillow.

Trixie put her hoof on his cheek, "Trixie can tell something is wrong. Please tell her."

Alexander sat up and hung his head, "I've lied to you Trixie."

She sat up, a look of shock on her face, "Lied? About what?"

He took a ragged breath and looked at her, "About the true me... and what's happened to me."

She looked him over, "What do you mean?"

He gulped and reached up and pulled his goggles down, for the first time in front of someone else.

She gasped at the sight of his eyes.

They were the shape of a dragon's eyes, but different from Lance's. But, the thing that stuck out the most was the red crack in the eyeball itself. It looked like the eye was cracked, like it was glass or weak metal.

Alexander looked away from her, afraid of what she might say or do.

Instead, he felt her wrap her forelegs around him and felt her lay her head on his shoulder.

"What? Aren't you afraid or something?" He asked confused.

"Why should Trixie be afraid of the one she loves? She loves you to much for something like this to push her away." She said as she pulled back and made him look at her, "Now, tell Trixie what you lied about."

Alexander hung his head, "Remember what I told you about how I got here?"

"Yes."

He looked up, "That wasn't really the truth. I made it up... It was to hard to tell you what really happened."

She kissed him on the forehead and put her hooves on his, "You can tell Trixie."

Alexander smiled slightly and took a breath, "Alright. I'll tell you."

Tests. It was all about tests. Test after… test after test after test after TEST AFTER TEST!!!! My pain,… my suffering was all just one big TEST! I was created from a test, people died because of tests, I'm not sane because of TESTS!…. Let me start from the beginning,.. the last day that I was human,…'human'… I don't think that apply's to me anymore… I fear that I am not human anymore,.. not even pony.

When the world, my world; Earth, ended on December 21 at 12:00am, I was transported to a white room. There, God spoke to me and gave me three choices,… if I could redo that whole event, I would have gone straight to Equestira. But,.. no, I chose the world of Portal; for the people reading this that don't know the world of Portal I will explain. Portal, it is a puzzle game using a portal gun that is powered by a black hole that is in the gun it's self, its power source is the blackhole, and all of it is very unstable. But more importantly that world was another earth, but it was an earth in the future,… so in the future humans created Aperture Laboratories, a facility to test out new things that would change the world… more then they knew, they would succeed. They created an A.I. called Glados, Glados would run the Laboratory, build the robots,the turrets, and the portal guns. But soon, the humans who created her saw that she didn't care… SHE DIDN'T CARE about anything or anyone!! All she cared about was the things that would only benefit her, the scientists soon made another A.I. to regulate Glados, they called this one Wheatley.

They made him for one purpose, but the one purpose soon was corrupted. The A.I. wanted to be the head of the Laboratory instead of Glados,… the humans thought that by creating more A.I. to regulate the others would work… they thought it WOULD WORK!!! No.. it didn't. They started to make more A.I.'s: Rick the adventure core, the Space core, and more and more and more!! But soon, as any A.I., Glados grew smarter and found out that she didn't need any humans at ALL!! So in one night… she fill the whole planet with nerotoxin… and killed every single human being on the planet!!… except for one, and that one human out smarted Glados…twice. We tried to find her,... on the surface but… we were forever trapped in the hands of Glados, in the underground Aperture Laboratory.

When I got there,.. to the world of Portal I wasn't the only one, others from my earth came… last I counted, there was 200 hundred of us. Glados was pleased at our presences…. pleased of only what she could DO WITH US!! She was slowly, and painfully… killing us off… one by one, day after day, TEST AFTER TEST!! Not even the cores would stop her,… the cores were soon broken, corrupted, never to work properly… ever again. No one was going to fix them,… our last hope was gone… BUT IT WASN'T LIKE IT WAS EVEN THERE!!! There was no hope,… no light of day… NO WAY OUT!!… When I was transported there I found my friend Jinix…. why did he have to come here… WHY! I was happy, I was only happy to see him at that moment, after that… it was just pain a suffering.

The first test… I still have it fresh in my mind…ITS STILL IN MY MIND… I CAN'T GET IT OUT!!! I was put into a room with five other people, including Jinix; there were no exit, no windows and no cameras. Then… ohh then,… THAT WAS IT!!! The room filled with nerotoxin,.. everyone fell down,… dead, blood coming from their mouths, and foam… coming out OF THERE EYES!!… Nerotoxin: a deadly gas that attacks the nervous system to a point of a complete body shut down; you breathe it in… and within 5 seconds your on the ground dead. But I… and Jinix, we didn't die, we only suffered…. the pain inside us was monumental, I coughed up blood to no end… soon, the test was soon over and when Glados came in…. and saw that I and Jinix were still alive… well… WE GAVE HER PURPOSE!! SOMETHING TO LOOK FORWARD TO!! It was an experiment that she wanted to do… since the day that she was made… to make a living… portal. She soon took us both,… and then the surgery's started… she laid me on a table and strapped me down with metal bars. "Don't worry.." she would say.."These bars are for my safety… your safety in the matter is highly disregarded in the matter"

Then… ohh then… there would be ten ejections, 10 going in my stomach, 10 going in my heart…, and 10 going in my spinal cord. She… SHE DIDN'T PUT US EVEN TO SLEEP!! She threw me,… back into the room.. and refilled it with the gas.. again, and again, and again,… AND AGAIN!! This,.. this was to create an immunity to the gas… but the pain,.. the pain was still there,… burning inside me.. the pain still stayed, no matter how many shots, no matter if the room refills a hundred times… I will always feel it burning inside me. Then,.. the real tests started,.. she threw us into a test chamber, after test chamber AFTER TEST CHAMBER! But,.. Jinix was smart,.. he failed a test to escape the future pain… that I would soon experience; Glados was just about to… to kill him, but… Jinix proposed a deal, since he was like me… more ways then one… he wanted to be a researcher, to think of new tests and new surgeries to do on to me. I felt betrayed.. my friend turned to the side of Glados… I felt like,… there was no hope..NO HOPE AT ALL!!

One day,… I think it was a day, I had been in the test chambers for so long I forgot there even was a night… I was supposed to fling myself to the other side to the test chamber… but I missed the portal… and my legs… were broken. Glados came,… I was happy,… I thought I was going to die and I was happy about it,.. I was happy that I would be far await from this hell hole of a Laboratory…. but… I spoke to soon. She put me back to the table… and then the real surgery began,… IT BEGAN AND NEVER STOPPED!! She,.. she cut off my legs,.. and.. and stripped the flesh off of my legs… all that was left was just bone. Then, she took the cleansed bones and combined them with machine parts… and she soon reattached my leg… she reattached them my jamming them up the stub of what was once my leg… and she then weld my new leg to my body… with hot liquid metal. It burned my skin in an instant,… the pain was unreal,.. the bleeding that once was a quiet stream,… turned into a raging river. She soon threw me into a test chamber,.. no healing, no recovery time,… JUST TESTS!!

I tried to stand,… but the pain was to much, and I fell down… she soon shocked me to get up and to complete the test… I was crying at that point… crying from the pain I had to endure. But sure enough… I had grown accustom to my new, once human legs… in the test chambers before,.. my legs bleed to on end,… blood covered my foot steps were ever I walked. Glados soon made a robotic cover for my legs,.. they were metal plates or panels to simulate human skin,… but soon enough… my new legs were not the final improvement. My bones and muscle were weak, and they would tire out easily,… Glados saw this, like everything else… and I was soon on the table…for. Another. SURGERY!! She used ten needles, 10 in my muscle, 10 in my bone,… and 10.. in my spine!! She did this three times… I felt my muscles burn as they grew bigger,… I felt my nerves on fire,… and my bones felt like there were being broken… AND PUT BACK TOGETHER AGAIN!! My bone mass and strength were increased by 10, my muscle mass and strength… by 10.

After… after it was all done… I felt stronger, faster even…. I was then subjected to strength tests,… lifting 5 then 20 tons on my back… and carrying them across test chambers. But soon…It was back to the regular tests…but… WHAT IS REGULAR ABOUT ANY OF THESE TESTS!!!! Then,.. something happened… one of the test chambers had fire in it…FIRE… SHE HAD FIRE!! The test chamber was not a chamber at all,… it was a room… there was a window in front of me… I saw…I SAW JINIX WITH GLADOS!!! They were behind a terminal… soon, anger welled up inside me, I ran to the window and I started to slam my fist into the glass. But soon, the floor started to move,… revealing hundreds upon hundreds of pipes,… then the smell of gasoline floated to my nose… next,… all I heard was a click. I was quickly engulfed in flames… this torture lasted 30 seconds… burning my body to a black crisp.

I was soon…BACK ON THAT TABLE!!! I soon black out from the pain of my melted flesh and blood lost. I woke up,… not knowing what had happened,… I was back into the room,… I didn't have my portal gun with me… there was no way out now. Then…click…after the flash of fire I felt my skin and flesh melt.. but then I felt a different sort of pain.. the pain of being put back together again. When I blacked out, Glados put nanobots in my blood,… in the past I was loosing a lot of blood, this prevented Glados from doing surgery's one after another… after another after another AFTER ANOTHER!!! And soon, the nanobots were in my cells… I could now heal external and internal injures three times as fast.

But something happened in that room,…. it was soon time for the blue flames, but when it engulfed me…. nothing happened,… the fire seemed to dance along my skin, licking every pore of my skin. This actually made me…a little happy,.. but then it shut off, Glados and Jinix soon put me back into a test chamber…and now all of them..HAD A FIRE ELEMENT!! But,… these tests were not enough..they were NEVER. ENOUGH!! Soon the test got harder, longer,… and each one more unbearable then the last,… and one day…I LOST MY MIND!!

One day,… my…my parents appeared,… they wanted to be with me… I should of been happy to see them but,… but I wasn't. I wanted to know why they were here… and why they would follow me… there intentions were good and pure,… but they wrote there own death sentence. Glados saw me,… she came to me and asked how I could have been made….I stayed listen,… I knew that, to Glados, knowledge was always power, and she wanted more power. My parents soon explained how : 'a man and a women who love each very much…', Glados was soon not interested… and SHE PROVED THAT GREATLY!! She put my parents in an advanced test chamber… they never played video games, they didn't even know what portal was.
And this test chamber had everything from turrets to fire, from water to weight lifting….after 30 seconds… my mom was gunned down by 5 turrets…and my dad fell in to the water, and he was soon electrocuted….IN THE WATER!! And the worst of all was that….I saw it happen…one by one I saw my parents die….a front row seat Glados would say. And… and after that day,….I LOST MY MIND!!! She made me loose my mind…IT WAS ALL PLANED…ALL A TEST!!! The other people in the center…they… they called it Fear…Glados created FEAR!!! For 20 days,… Fear ruled,… he took the tests,… and those tests…those tests were the combat tests.

Fear… Fear killed every single person that was brought in front of him,…. I STILL REMEMBER HOW HE DID IT!! It was always slow.. there screams still haunt my dreams…Fear always went to the neck first. He would cut the persons neck..gently gliding the knife down… leaving a slow trail of blood that would flow down the neck of the victim. Then… he would quickly stab the person… over and over and over again. Jinix told me about my sleepless nights… I would laugh…and laugh and laugh… I would slam my head against a wall… screaming…"Are you there…Fear will find you".

Jinix soon found out what Glados did…what she did TO ME!! He quickly took me in… he soon helped me recover… it was slow but the recovery was successful.. to some extant. Fear would come out in my dreams,… and he would come out when I couldn't take what was going on. I…I was finally sane..after 20 days I was sane,.. but I soon gone back to…back to the TEST CHAMBERS!! You know…. back on earth I would love to do the jumps tests… it was when I would put a portal on a tall platform and jump into a portal on the ground and this would make me fly across the chamber,… but it soon went wrong. I was in a special test chamber made for me…MADE FOR ME SHE SAID!! There was a spring on the opposite wall that was suppose to bounce me to another part of the chamber….it would seem at the time that the machine that worked the spring was not working. As I was in the air the spring shot out too early…and the wall it had exploded off of the spring.

It was heading for me….when I landed, I look at my body,… I had seemed to be all in one piece… then I fell into darkness. I saw a white light… I thought that I was free… I was free at last,.. I felt the cold hand of death upon me,… but… I soon felt pain…I soon screamed in agony. I finally woke up…I was back on the bloody table.. it was covered with my blood,… there was flesh stains and dried stains, from the past surgeries. There was a mirror on the table beside me,… and when I looked at it… I had lost the left side of my head and face!! I was now…PART MACHINE!! I had lost my face forever,… I wasn't even recognizable to Jinix,….in his eyes I saw disgust.

Then,… I was injected with many shots,… it was needle after needle after needle AFTER NEEDLE!! Each needle went into a different part of my body… and the needles ware filled with hot liquid metal. It burned my insides to no end…I looked at my limbs,…. that I was born with… the hot metal seem to seep out of my pores of my skin,…along with my blood. My skin started to metal off,… but my skin was soon enough back in place. I was soon facing a computer screen…It told me that the metal had formed around my bones and the metal quickly formed an indoskeletion … inside me. But, that wasn't the only thing that happened on that day…on that SAME TABLE!! Soon,… Glados did the one thing that made me what I am today. She somehow fused a blackhole to my DNA,… I saw on a computer screen how my DNA was being taken apart and replaced by the blackhole,… the nucleotides were soon destroyed,…and replaced with what looked like blue, orange, red, and green strands of…something. I soon realized that she had done it..SHE MADE ME INTO A LIVING PORTAL!!

But…that wasn't the only thing she had done to me on that same day…ON THAT FUCKIN TABLE!! I was still strapped down by the metal bars… I tied to struggle free but even with all my strength they did not budge. I saw a button.. it said press me..PRESS ME IT SAID!! I was so stupid… I pressed it… soon enough something happened…SOMETHING HAPPENED!! I started to hear the sound of moving parts and then…a sharp metal object came down and stabbed my…. my heart. But that wasn't the worst of it,… electricity started coming from it….and it flowed through my body stinging every nerve. "I see that you fell for it…you stupid human" she said.

I felt my heart starting to pump faster,… and soon enough it had stopped,…. but I did not die. When I awoke,… she gave me a new heart that was 3 times too big for my body,… so she installed a machine inside me…. it was like a container for my heart. Glados then made clear disc that she said that was suppose to regulate my heart,…. I WAS NOW MORE MACHINE THEN HUMAN!!! But that wasn't all she had done,… she went into my genes and changed me,… she gave me dominant traits of everything. When I enter portal I was 5 foot 4,… and now I was 6 foot 7. She had changed my eyes,… I could see more than 20/20 vision,… and I could see farther and could see things coming faster… she soon made me dodge bullets. But, she took away more,… she somehow found the gene for aging, and…. a normal person would live to 90 to 100, but I was going to live to 450 to 550 years old. That only told me that I was going to be stuck like this for a… a long time.
She then threw me into my room,…. it was more lie a holding chamber. I looked at myself in a mirror…I WAS EVEN UNRECOGNIZABLE TO ME!! I slammed my fist into the wall… and somehow electricity came from my fist,… I looked at my hand. I clapped my hands together and electricity came again,… I snapped my fingers and a blue flame stayed on my finger. I was a monster…A MONSTER!! I had to get out… I couldn't take it anymore,… I needed out of this place.

Three times…three times I tried to escape and all of them were failures,…except for the last one. One day, the first time I tried to escape… I had lost my left hand…Glados closed a portal on my hand…separating it forever… I soon had a robotic one to replace it. Second time,… I broken down in tears… that was the last straw for Glados… she saw that emotion was ruling my decisions, so she sought to take it out…. she was going to remove the last thing that made me still fell human. Jinix came to me, before that surgery… I could see that he was displeased,… but I didn't care, I was going to die inside anyway. He put his hand in is left pants pocket and pulled out a floppy disc…I laughed at the site of the disc, so even in the future there was still low tech.

He handed it to me and tapped the left side of his head,… and he silently exited the room,… I soon put the disc in the side of my head…and guess what, there was a entrance for the floppy disc. I was a robot now, there was no denying it. I put the disc in… and I saw his plan, he was working on something. He called it a blackhole portal… somehow he made a programable wormhole that would transport us to…… another world it would seem. He also had been studying how Glados works,… he was going to try to wipe Glados memory…completely. I knew that it would take three EMP's to even put her in sleep mode for 30 seconds.

I was soon put on the table,… and now… it was going to be the end of me… the end of me. But then, Jinix jumped on the back of Glados and put something on the back of her main processor. After a few moments of struggling… he… he had shut her down, but it was only temporarily. He only had 5 minutes to erase her short time memory,… the memory of the surgery that she was about to do. He soon handed me something,… it was a modified portal gun,… he told me to escape…and I did.
But I had to get to the top floor of the laboratory,…. it didn't take long but she… she woke up. I was in an empty room,… Glados was in her mobile unit,… it was a humanoid unit. She had Jinix on her shoulder… he was badly hurt and bleeding everywhere,… she soon threw his limb body towards me. I started up the portal gun and I portaled Jinix to another world,… I had to hold off Glados for two minutes before the portal gun could transport me to the world I wanted. But in those two minutes….she had almost killed me,… I was on the ground,… blood coming from every part of my body,…I felt that all my bones were broken. She put her face close to mind… I spit my blood on her face.
She was about to strike the finally blow when I put my hand on the side of her head… electricity came out along with the blue flames that I possess. There was a slight scream of agony ,… she was stunned but only for a short time. I then used to gun…. and i finally was free… free!!!! Once I was at the other end of the portal… I saw Fluttershy… I had made it… I was in the world that I wanted to be. But,… I have to live with the pain I feel… the memories at night. Also,… the constant fight inside with Fear…my bands… my bands used to have the names of my family and my friends… but now they are portal guns.

Even being with the mare of my dreams…Trixie… I loved her in the TV show… and I love her now, now that I am with her. But,… I am a MONSTER,… not human not even pony….I AM A FREAK!! She would never love… a monster like me….no one or pony would…

And now…now I live in the world of Equestira, forever suffering… forever in pain…forever….forever INSANE!! And now…forever alone.

Once he finished his full back story, he was already crying. Letting the tears roll down his face, the pain to much to bare.

Trixie had a look of horror on her face through out the whole thing.

After he finished, she just sat there, mouth open. Soon, she blinked and looked at him and whispered, "That.... all happened to you?"

Alexander nodded, tears still flowing down his face.

Trixie reached out and pulled him into a loving embrace, "Trixie... I'm sorry you had to go through that Alex. You are not a monster! Nor a freak! You are a loving and caring stallion. I love you for that, and so much more! Don't ever say I don't love you! Because that will never be true!"

Alexander openly cried into her shoulder, letting out all his pent up emotions.

He was happy, happy that he had finally told someone about the things he had endured.

He and Trixie sat there, holding each other.

"Everything....

This, was all planned....

And I always get what I want in the end."