//------------------------------//
// 9. Mare in the Mirror 
// Story: The Unbearable Lightness of Being Sweetie Belle 
// by Distaff Pope 
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        “Now, I’m sure you’re all very excited for Nightmare Night,” Miss Octavia said, looking out from her podium at an auditorium filled with ponies, “and far be it from me to keep you from celebrating the holiday. However, you should know that… How many of you are familiar with Discord?” Most of the hooves in the room went up.

        “And how many of you know he’s real?” About half the raised hooves went down.

        “And that he’s free from his prison?” Octavia frowned as even more hooves went down, leaving only about fifty up in the air. I sighed and wished I could lean against Diamond Tiara. It would be so nice if we could just admit we were together, but I wanted to make sure all my friends were okay with it first, especially Scootaloo, who was being… She hadn’t stopped being difficult since our fight a month ago. At least she hadn’t talked about leaving lately, although if she stayed like this… I don’t think I’d mind her leaving that much.

        “Right,” Octavia continued, “and just to make sure, who knows that Ponyville is one of his preferred haunts?”

        Only five hooves stayed up in the air, and my friends made up three of those. I glanced at Apple Bloom and Scootaloo sitting in front of me. It had been a while since the draconekis– drakon– drey– Discord had visited us, but he was actually really nice, and nowhere near as bad as everypony made him out to be. Like this one time, he showed us a whole bunch of alternate worlds to help us get our cutie marks, and he always tells the absolute best stories when he visits.

        Octavia sighed into her microphone. “Yes, well, I suppose finding a history teacher has just moved up on my priority list.” She shook her head for a second. “Anyways, for those living in blissful ignorance, Discord is the spirit of chaos and disharmony. After spending a thousand years as a lawn ornament in the castle gardens, Celestia, in her infinite wisdom, decided to rehabilitate him. Now, he’s free to…” 

I tuned her out, instead thinking about how great it would be to get out of school and spend at least an hour kissing Diamond Tiara before doing Nightmare Night stuff with my friends. It would be even better if I could kiss her in front of my friends, but… Scootaloo. I thought back to the growing pile of bits I’d saved up from my performances, and... maybe if I got Scootaloo something really nice, she might get back to her old self, but she’d turned down seeing the Wonderbolts with Rainbow Dash, so it’d have to be something really nice. If I had Diamond Tiara help me get her something nice, maybe the two of them could stop hating each other.

“...So for those of you intending to celebrate Nightmare Night, please be warned that Discord is planning a prank. He assures us it’s completely harmless, but… after last year, it was deemed best that everypony be properly warned. If you don’t want to be pranked, the school and dormitories have been designated a safe zone. If you’re not there at 6:00, you’ll be considered fair game for whatever he has planned. Any questions?”

        A filly in the front row raised a hoof. “You want us to believe that Discord is going to go around pranking ponies tonight? How gullible do you think we are, and why would you–”

        “Ah yes, well I suppose that brings us to...” Octavia sighed and took a deep breath before gesturing towards somepony off stage. “Fillies and gentlecolts, I present to you Discord, the elemental spirit of chaos and disharmony.”

        What looked a goat-headed snake with mismatched arms and legs walked out onto the stage, waving his paw-hand (as opposed to his talon-hand) at the audience. “Thank you, Tavi.” he said, grabbing the microphone with his tail and leaning over to float on his back, not bothering to use his wings to keep him up or explain just how he could just float in the air. “That was a lovely introduction. I particularly enjoyed the part where I turned off gravity.”

        Octavia sighed and rested her head against her forehoof. “I’m not taking the bait, Discord. Can you please just make the announcement?”

        “What bait?” he asked innocently. “I’m just talking about what happened… or is it will happen? Tenses are always so problematic.” I felt a tickle in my stomach, and when I looked back at the ground, I saw it was a hoof further away than it should be. Most of the ponies in the room shrieked while a few laughed. I gave a giggle and tried swimming through the air before bumping into Melody.

        “Sorry,” I said, trying not to giggle as she gave another small scream. Around us, more and more ponies switched to laughing as they got used to the lack of gravity. “I didn’t mean to hit you.”

        “It’s fine,” she said, trying to stop herself from spinning while I enjoyed the feeling of seeing the world upside down. Was she blushing or– My thoughts vanished and my cheeks suddenly got hot as Tiara’s head accidentally bumped into my flank, spinning me towards the front of the room, where Discord tapped his chin with his talon-hand. “It’s good, but it needs something else. What do you think, Tavi?” he asked, turning to look at the only pony who wasn’t floating in the air.

“I think you should just make your announcement and gently set everypony back on the ground,” Miss Octavia said, glaring at him from her spot on the auditorium.

“But they’re having so much fun,” he said before snapping his claws. “That’s it! Discord, you handsome genius, how could I have ever doubted you?” Giant bubbles suddenly popped into existence around us, and I immediately grabbed on to one of them and rode it towards Discord and Octavia, leaving my friends (except Scootaloo, I couldn’t find her in the chaos of several hundred ponies floating around each other) behind to bounce their bubbles off each other.

“Discord!” Octavia said, hanging from the ceiling, or… no, I was just upside down. “You promised no pranks.”

“Indeed, I did,” he said, floating over/below her. “But this isn’t a prank, it’s a surprise. Pranks aren’t this much fun.”

Octavia growled as I bounced in her general direction. “Don’t you have something to tell everypony here?”

“Oh yes,” he said, turning back to look at us. “Everypony, listen up. Because Nightmare Night technically honors this academy’s patron, the rest of your classes are cancelled and the auditorium will remain a gravity-free zone until the night ends. Have fun!”

We all let out a cheer while Miss Octavia’s face went red with anger. “That… You…” she sputtered at him. “I was going to tell them we were having a special Nightmare Night party in the cafeteria after the assembly was over. It was supposed to be a–”

“A surprise?” he asked, tilting his head and laughing. “It looks like mine’s better. Still, if anypony wants to leave the bubble room to go to your boring Nightmare Night party, they’re free to do so.”

“Your party doesn’t sound boring,” I said, floating  over Miss Octavia and Discord. “It’s just, how often do you get to…” I trailed off as I saw the back half of an orange pegasus sneak out of the auditorium. “Scootaloo!” I yelled, bouncing myself off the stage’s back wall towards the door. Unfortunately, it’s really hard to go fast without gravity, and it’s even harder to steer yourself, so I was stuck slowly drifting towards the doors exit, occasionally being bounced off course by somepony else.

Several minutes later, I finished slowly floating towards the exit and headed off after my friend, giving one last look to the rest of my friends bouncing and laughing above me as I opened the door. I could have called my friends over to help, but… they were having so much fun, I couldn’t take that away from them. Instead, I gave them all a tiny smile and slipped out of the auditorium, hoping nopony had noticed me.

Scootaloo sat alone in the middle of a cafeteria filled with cobwebs, plastic spiders, carved pumpkins and snack tables, staring down at a plate of Nightmare Night cookies. “Oh hey,” she said, briefly looking up at me before going back to staring at her plate. “Why’d you leave the bubble auditorium?”

Really? She was asking me that? I tried not to roll my eyes as I sat next to her. “Because I wanted to make sure you’re okay. I thought you’d be super happy about getting a chance to fly.”

“Sure,” she said, snorting. “I get to pretend to fly for a few hours, enjoy how awesome it is, and then go back to being stuck on the ground. Not exactly my idea of a fun time.” She frowned and took a sip of her punch. “I think I’d prefer to just not fly at all.”

Ugh! She was being so… I don’t even know the right word, just… why did she have to be so stupid about this? She was still really fun and great even if she couldn’t fly. At least, she used to be. Now, she was pretty much the opposite of that. Still… I took a deep breath and smiled at her. “Come on, it’ll be fun,” I said, trying to cheer her up. Every now and then, I could see a little glimpse of the old Scootaloo, but it was buried under all the other stuff.

Scootaloo gave me a tiny smile and shook her head. “Sorry, Sweetie, but I just don’t… You should go and have fun.”

“Why are you being so difficult?” I snapped, immediately regretting it. “I know it stinks that you can’t fly, but I thought you knew that. What’s the big deal? None of us care if you can’t fly, we think you’re great like you are.”

“I don’t care what you think,” she said, glaring at me. “You all might be fine with the fact that I can never fly, but I’m not. I want to fly, I want to be like Rainbow Dash, I want to visit my parents in Cloudsdale, but I can’t do any of that because my stupid wings don’t work right.”

“Hey girls, what are you doin’ out here?” Apple Bloom asked. “This… I don’t think anypony’s gonna leave the bubble room to play here. Even the teachers are having fun. Well, except Miss Octavia, she’s just starin’ down Discord.”

“Scootaloo’s being difficult,” I said, pointing a hoof at my friend. “She’s upset because… I don’t even know why she’s upset this time.”

“I told you, it’s because… you know what, forget it. If you couldn’t understand it the first time, I don’t think you’ll understand it the second time I try to explain it to you.” She rolled her eyes at me, and I tried really hard not to lose my temper.

“I understand that you’re so set on being sad because you can’t fly that you won’t enjoy the good things. You… I just want to see you happy, but it’s like nothing can cheer you up. Tell me what I can do to help you feel better and I’ll do it,” I said.

“You can leave me alone,” she said. “It should be easy for you, just do some more concerts and spend time with your new best friend. I know that’s what you want to do anyways.”

She dared?! She dared act like I wasn’t a good friend after all I’d… “What’s your problem?” I yelled. “It’s like I don’t even know who you are. The last month, it’s been all moping and whining, and I can’t… What happened to the cool confidant pony who didn’t worry about anything? What happened to the Scootaloo I knew?”

Scootaloo laughed, but it wasn’t a real laugh, it was mean and sad and twisted and not very fun at all. “Where’ve I heard that before?  Sounds awfully like something I said when my friend Sweetie Belle was replaced with a frilly girly-girl.”

“Uhmm… maybe you two should go and spend some time apart,” Apple Bloom said, cutting in between us and smiling nervously. “You know, before anypony says something she might regret later.”

“Fine!” I yelled, completely ignoring Apple Bloom. If Scootaloo wanted to be miserable all the time, she could do that on her own. “It looks like we can both agree on one thing: we don’t know each other anymore.”

“Yeah, I guess we don’t,” Scootaloo said. “Have fun wearing makeup and worrying about whether or not boys like you and all the other girly crap you seem to love so much.”

I tried not to laugh at the last bit. Worrying about boys didn’t strike me as something I was ever going to do, unless it was worrying about how to let a boy down nicely. “And you can have fun being… Oh wait, apparently you can’t have fun anymore.” I grit my teeth and spun around, storming off as angrily as I could, while tears stung my eyes.


***


        “You wanna talk?” Apple Bloom said, sitting next to me. I’d curled up in front of my locker and started crying, barely bothered by the fact that the linoleum floor kind of needed cleaning… I made a note to take a shower before I got into my Nightmare Night costume.

        “I’m fine,” I said, sniffling. Why was I so sad? Scootaloo was being a big dumb idiot, so why should I be sad about not being friends with her anymore? “Just… what’s gotten into Scootaloo lately?”

        Apple Bloom sighed as she leaned against the wall of lockers. “You know what’s gotten into her, and… I get the last month hasn’t been fun, but we just gotta give her some time. She’s got a lot to work through.”

        “It looks like she just has one thing to deal with, and just doesn’t want to,” I said, mumbling into my tail.

        “And you know it isn’t that simple,” Apple Bloom said. “How’d you feel if you learned you could never get your cutie mark or use magic?” 

        “Not… not great,” I said, frowning and lifting my head up to look at her. “But I’d get over it. How hard is it to just accept that? Even if…” I tried to think about how I’d feel if I couldn’t cheer ponies up by singing. “Even if I couldn’t deal with it easily, I wouldn’t go and make my friends miserable.”

        “I know you wouldn’t,” she said, smiling at me. “But that’s you. Scootaloo… I’m sure if you give her a bit of time and space, she’ll start feelin’ better. Just… if she apologizes, you’ll forgive her, right?”

        “Yeah,” I said, nodding my head at my friend. Maybe I could use my small pile of bits to get her something nice, instead of… To get her something nice. I sniffled back tears and gave her a tiny smile. “Thanks for checking up on me.”

        “Don’t worry about it,” she said, getting up on her hooves. “So, wanna go back to the bubble room?”

        I nodded and bounced up on my hooves. If a room filled with giant bubbles couldn’t make me forget about Scootaloo, then nothing could (except maybe alcohol, but I couldn’t figure out a good way to get into Rarity’s liquor cabinet without risking her noticing).


***


        My bubble floated past Discord, who was still talking with Miss Octavia. “Come on,” he said, “I know there’s a part of you that wants to join in the fun, and Nightmare Night comes but once a year.”

        “And believe me, I’m quite thankful for that. If nights like last year’s Nightmare Night become commonplace, I’ll quickly lose what little sanity I have left,” Octavia said. What’d happened last Nightmare Night, anyways? I remembered getting into my costume, and I kind of remembered some stuff after that, but it was all really blurry.

        “Oh, I already apologized for that,” he said, dismissively waving a paw at her. “I also promised not to use any magic on you without your consent, and I owe you a reality-warping favor of your choice, so I really don’t see why you’re still hung up on last year’s unpleasantness. Is it my fault you refused to wear a costume?”

        “What are you guys talking about?” I asked, spinning around in circles over them. “Do you know what happened last Nightmare Night? Nopony else seems to remember all the details, and I kind of want to know how much candy I got. Scoot– My friends and I had a bet to see who could collect the most, and I want to know if I won.”

        “Really?” Octavia asked, raising an eyebrow. “Your memories of an entire night are almost completely obliterated, and your primary concern is who collected the most candy?”

        I nodded at her from my bubble while Discord laughed. “You’re a pony after my own heart, Sweetie Belle,” he said when he finished laughing. “Are you enjoying my little surprise?”

        “I sure am,” I said, bouncing off my bubble and launching myself towards the ground. “This is almost as good as that time you tried to help us get our cutie marks.”

        “Well, I’m glad somepony can enjoy themselves here. Your teacher seems absolutely determined to hold a grudge against little old me,” he said. “Even though I apologized and offered to make amends, she still won’t forgive me.” 

        “Why won’t you forgive him?” I asked before Octavia  could say anything.  “If he wants to apologize, then what’s the point of staying angry?”

        “He killed me!” Octavia yelled, glaring at him. “Multiple times. You’ll forgive me if I don’t feel like pardoning my own murderer.” I guess… that was probably the best reason to stay mad at somepony I could think of.

        “First of all,” he said, standing up to his full height, “I never killed you, other ponies did that. Second of all, you got better.”

        Octavia gave a growl while I looked between the two of them. “Discord,” I said, looking up at him as I bounced off the floor. It’s really hard to stop bouncing when there’s no gravity. “That’s… if you want her to forgive you, maybe you shouldn’t joke about it as much. Maybe just try being nice with her.”

        “Fine,” he said, sighing and snapping his fingers. Eight hundred ponies who were floating through the school’s massive auditorium just a second ago found themselves in the middle of the cafeteria, their hooves on solid ground. “I suppose your little party wasn’t too terrible, and… consider this a little apology for my boorish behavior today.”

        “This doesn’t make us anywhere close to even,” Miss Octavia said, still keeping her glare trained on him.

        “Oh, of course not,” he said, flashing her an uneven smile. “I imagine you’ll be holding Nightmare Night over my head until your dying breath… Unless, of course, you’d prefer it if you didn’t die. You’d have an eternity to practice that viola of yours.”

        “Cello,” Miss Octavia said, correcting him.

        “Then you could learn to play a viola,” he said, shrugging his shoulders as he snaked around her. Around us, the students were finally getting over their shock and a few of them were taking a hesitant step towards the snack table. “There’s a lot to do with an eternity, far be it from me to tell you how to spend it.”

        “I think I’ll pass,” Octavia said, her glare softening. “The idea of spending an eternity watching those I care about withering and dying doesn’t strike me as particularly appealing.”

        Discord’s goofy smile vanished for a second. “No, I’d imagine it isn’t. Something I never considered before, actually. Perhaps I’ll stop by and talk with Celestia about how she deals with it tomorrow. Still, there has to be something I can tempt you with to even the score between us… Ooh! I can take away your memories of Nightmare Night, maybe dull the edges a bit if you’d prefer.”

        Octavia shook her head. “I don’t think so, as unpleasant as it was, I can live with those memories. They helped make me the mare I am today. No, I can’t think of a situation where forgetting would be better than remembering. Besides, I’m not about to let you out of your debt so easily.” She turned to look at me. “Shouldn’t you be playing with your friends, Sweetie Belle? I can’t imagine listening to adults talk is particularly entertaining for you.”

        “Actually, it is,” I said, smiling at her. “I mean… You two sound like you’re the only ponies who remember last year’s Nightmare Night, and I was kind of curious–”

        “You don’t want to know the details,” Octavia said, frowning. “The short version is: Discord played a prank on everypony in Equestria. It didn’t go particularly well.”

        “But I can’t think of a situation where forgetting is better than remembering,” I said, throwing her words from a second earlier back at her.

        “Very good point, Sweetie,” Discord said, moving to stand next to me.  I looked back at my friends who were talking with Scootaloo about something… Whatever, they could talk with her if they wanted, and I could just talk with Octavia and Discord instead, although… why wasn’t Diamond Tiara with me? There was no way she would choose Scootaloo over me. I mean, we were dating.

        Miss Octavia rubbed her forehead. “Fine, I don’t know exactly what you did during Nightmare Night, but Discord’s spell turned you into your costume.”

        “You mean I was turned into a bunch of clothes?” I squeaked. No wonder I couldn’t remember Nightmare Night.

        “N– no,” Octavia said, stammering while Discord laughed hysterically. “Not… he turned you into whatever you were dressed up as.”

        “Oh. That makes much more sense,” I said, nodding my head. “So then why can’t I remember being a zombie?”

        “Because–” Octavia raised an eyebrow. “Wait, you dressed up as a zombie? Really?”

        I nodded my head. Zombies were totally cool. Not as cool as vampires, but I’d done that one a few years ago, and you just can’t repeat Nightmare Night costumes, that’s super boring.

        “Allow me to explain,” Discord said before Miss Octavia could start talking again. “In my infinite wisdom, I thought it would be best if little fillies and colts didn’t remember Nightmare Night at all. After all, I didn’t want to traumatize anypony.”

        Miss Octavia’s glare returned. “Oh, you would’ve been fine if you’d gotten into the spirit of the holiday,” Discord said. “It’s not like I set out to scar you, I didn’t even know you at the time.”

        “We talked just a week before,” Octavia yelled, causing a few fillies to glance at her. Apparently Discord talking with the school’s headmistress just wasn’t that interesting compared to free snacks.

        “From your perspective,” he said, shrugging. “But from a non-linear, non-subjective viewpoint… Well, you really must learn to think outside the box, Tavi.”

        I heard a bunch of noise coming from behind me, and turned to see Miss Lyra surrounded by a bunch of students. On the one hoof, Discord and Octavia’s talk was kind of interesting. On the other hoof, if she was going to be setting up games or something, that was way more fun. I gave one last glance to Octavia and Discord before trotting towards my friends.


***


        Diamond Tiara and I walked through the school courtyard as ponies pushed past us. “So,” I said, daring to brush my flank against hers in public, “what do you think Discord’s Nightmare Night prank is going to be? I hope I actually get to remember it this year, because turning into my costume sounds so much fun, I can’t believe I forgot it.”

        She rubbed her forehead. “Is that what happened last Nightmare Night?” she asked, as we trotted off to pick our costumes up from the boutique.

        “Wait a second, please,” a voice called out from behind us. I looked back to see Life Bloom trotting towards us. “I want to go over your math work before Nightmare Night starts properly,” she said, catching up to us. Rarity had hired her to tutor me about math stuff a month ago, and since then, she’d really taught me a lot about solving for variables, while I tried to help her with being a bit friendlier. I think she’d made more progress teaching me than I had with her.

        “I don’t know,” I said, glancing between her and Diamond Tiara. Tiara was going on her Manehattan trip in the next few weeks, and I really wanted to get as much kissing time in as possible with her before she left, since Rarity wouldn’t let me go with her for some dumb reason. On the other hoof, I couldn’t just say we were dating, and Life Bloom wanted to help me.

        “It won’t take more than an hour, and I promise you and Diamond Tiara can go back to whatever romantic thing you have planned,” Life Bloom said as we started our walk back to the boutique.

        “You know?” I asked, feeling my chest suddenly get tight with panic. Based on the look on Diamond Tiara’s face, she was feeling the same thing I was.

        “Your romantic affiliation is quite obvious,” Life Bloom said. “The two of you seem to spend all your time together, and the way you constantly lean on each other for support… A pony would have to be blind to miss the fact that you two are dating.”

        “So everypony knows?” I asked, thinking back to Scootaloo. Is that why she’d been… well, if she knew, she would’ve said something, right?

        Life Bloom shook her head. “I don’t think Melody and Scootaloo… they might see the evidence, but they seem to be going to great lengths to avoid the obvious conclusion. Melody in particular seems intent on deluding herself.”

        “What’s that supposed to mean?” I asked as Diamond Tiara tensed up next to me.

        “It means the mare is ignoring evidence for reasons…” Life Bloom sighed. “For reasons that should be obvious.”

        I frowned and looked at her. “Are you trying to say that she likes me? Because she barely talks to me anymore, so I don’t think…” I looked to Diamond Tiara for help.

        “I think what Sweetie’s trying to say is that if Melody liked her, she would be a bit more obvious about it,” Diamond Tiara said, kissing me on the cheek and leaning into me. At her touch, my worries shrank into nothing and I let out a sigh of relief. If Melody liked me, I’d know about it, and so far she hadn’t done anything that made me think she did. Besides, why wouldn’t she tell me she liked me?

        Life Bloom just sighed. “I think you have all the information you need to draw the correct conclusions. If you, too, are intent on avoiding those conclusions, that’s… I will follow your advice and hold my tongue for now.”

        I guess that was good? She wasn’t immediately being brutally honest anymore, but I really wish… What was she getting at? Melody didn’t like me. If she did, I’d have a problem, because then I’d have to figure out how to make her happy and keep Tiara happy, and what if there were other ponies who liked me and I had to make them happy, and… I started to hyperventilate.

        “Everything’s fine,” Tiara said, nuzzling at my neck until I calmed down. “I’m here, and that’s all you need to focus on.”

        I nodded as I worked to clear my head of everything but Tiara. If I could just do that, I’d be fine. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, forgetting everything but Tiara’s touch. As I did, I felt my pounding heartbeat slow down. Once I’d calmed, I gave Tiara a thank-you kiss on the cheek and started walking again, while Life Bloom looked on, one eyebrow raised in curiosity.

        “In any event,” Life Bloom said as we reached the boutique, “the details of your romantic life are none of my business. What is my business, though, is making sure you understand the basics of geometric proofs.” Diamond Tiara sighed as I opened the door to the boutique. Hopefully we could get done with math stuff soon enough for us to do kissing stuff. At the very least we could do kissing stuff tomorrow. Hopefully.


***


        Life Bloom tapped her glasses as she looked through my homework, while Diamond Tiara leaned against me. “Very good,” Life Bloom said. “You clearly understand the core concept, although there are still a few problems with the execution.” She floated her pen up and made some marks on the paper. “You skipped a step here, used the wrong order of operations here, and there are a few other small mistakes here and there, but overall… this is solid B-level work.”

        “Thanks,” I said, trying not to giggle as Diamond Tiara kissed my cheek. Apparently, kissing me while I tried to work was a little game to her, and… yeah, it was a pretty fun one.

        “I assume your work will be even better when you don’t have somepony constantly distracting you,” Life Bloom said, looking back at me and rolling her eyes.

        “So, is there anything else you want to talk about or can we have some alone time before Nightmare Night?” Diamond Tiara asked, wrapping a foreleg around me and pressing me close to her while I let out a small happy sigh. Being next to her… Actually, doing anything with her just made me so happy.

        “Actually,” Life Bloom said as she floated her pen back to her saddlebags, “I was hoping we could talk about relationships. I had a few questions, and was hoping you could advise me.”

        “Sure,” I said, giggling as Diamond Tiara stroked my flank. Her touch was so soft and nice and amazing, I never wanted her to stop touching me. I rested my head against her neck, careful not to poke her with my horn. “You don’t mind if Diamond Tiara and I–”

        Life Bloom shook her head. “I’ve spent the last hour dealing with your displays of affection. At this point, I think I’m mostly immune.”

        “Great,” Tiara said, tilting her head to kiss the tip of my horn as my mind suddenly went completely empty. Her doing anything with my horn felt absolutely amazing, and horn kisses were somehow even better than regular kisses.

        “So,” I said, slowly regaining control of my head after Tiara’s horn kiss, “what did you want to talk about?” Life Bloom’s eyes had gone wide, and she was looking at us like we’d just just made out in front of her, which… actually, that would probably be really fun. Could we get to making out soon?

        “You… she just kissed your horn,” Life Bloom stammered.

        “I know,” I said, nodding enthusiastically. “It feels super great.” I turned to kiss Diamond Tiara’s neck. “Can I please just kiss the tip of her horn to show her how nice it feels?”

        “Absolutely not!” Life Bloom said, her eyes somehow going even wider. “That’s… Kissing another unicorn’s horn is… It’s something intensely personal. Please, never ever try to kiss another unicorn’s horn unless you’re dating them and nopony else is around. Hasn’t somepony spoken with you about hornplay?”

        “No,” I said, frowning and shaking my head. “What’s the big deal about it though? It doesn’t hurt anypony and feels super good. Like, have you even tried it?” Next to me, Diamond Tiara was trying her hardest not to snicker as her hoof went back to stroking my flank. What was so funny?

        Life Bloom took a deep breath. “Kissing another pony’s horn… your nervous system is intimately tied with your horn, and any stimulation of it… Hornplay… Perhaps I’m a prude, but the only pony I’d even consider letting kiss my horn would be a very special somepony, and I’d never entertain the notion of doing it in public.” She glanced at Diamond Tiara. “But I’m guessing you knew that.”

        “A little,” Tiara said as I settled back against her, feeling incredibly calm after the horn kiss. I still don’t see what the big deal about it is, it feels good, so what’s the problem? “I know it’s not something you should do in public, and that it’s apparently one of the best feelings a unicorn can have.”

        “Then if you knew it was supposed to be private, why did you do it right in front of me?” Life Bloom asked, fidgeting uncomfortably with her glasses.

        I smiled slowly at my friend. “I don’t know, but I’m glad she did,” I said, my whole body feeling relaxed. Horn kisses were the absolute best thing to forget about my fight with Scootaloo. If Tiara could just kiss my horn every hour or so, I might be able to deal with seeing Scootaloo tonight, which… I’d probably have to do since she was still a crusader and we always trick-or-treated together.

        Tiara patted me on the side, causing me to give another happy sigh. “I don’t know,” Tiara said, shrugging. “I guess I just wanted to see how you’d react. Like, maybe it wasn’t that big a deal.”

        “Well it is,” Life Bloom said, managing to look everywhere but at me. 

Was she being shy for some reason? Maybe if somepony kissed her horn, she wouldn’t freak out so much about this… Speaking of which… “What did you want to ask me about?” I asked, pulling the conversation away from horn kisses.

“Yes,” she said, glancing from my homework to me, “I was actually hoping to ask your advice on the courting process. It... “ Life Bloom looked between me and Diamond Tiara. “Can she keep a secret?”

“Mm-hmm,” I said, nodding my head a tiny bit, taking care to not accidentally stab Tiara with my horn. “You can keep a secret, right, Tiara?”

“I suppose,” she said, “but I was really looking forward to us having some alone time so I could kiss your horn a few more times before we have to go get ready for Nightmare Night.” My eyes went wide and my heart quickened at the idea.

“Can you ask your questions really quickly?” I asked, trying not to whimper at the thought of how close Diamond Tiara’s lips were to my horn tip. 

“Yes, I believe I would like to end this conversation as quickly as possible,” Life Bloom said, clearing her throat. Why was she suddenly so uncomfortable? I wasn’t doing anything bad, was I? Nopony was being hurt. “I was just wondering… how would you suggest I earn Apple Bloom’s interest? After our… fight a month ago, I’m having a hard time imagining a successful courtship.”

“You’re doing that thing where you talk super formally,” I said, frowning at her and trying to focus on the conversation and not Diamond Tiara or her lips or my horn or any of those things. Life Bloom and Apple Bloom, that was… important to Life Bloom. Had to focus on it and not kisses.

“Sorry,” Life Bloom said, rubbing one of her forehooves against the carpet nervously. “It’s… something I’m working on. Anyways, my question stands, how should I go about informing Apple Bloom of my infatuation? Is now the ideal time, or should I continue demonstrating value…” She shook her head. “No, that sounds too manipulative, but…”

“You like her and want to tell her that, but you also don’t want to mess things up by telling her,” I said, nodding at her slowly, enjoying the feeling of my muscles moving. I felt like I’d just had the most amazing stretch ever.

“That adequately sums up my dilemma, yes,” Life Bloom said. “It is… I only have one shot at this, so I feel I need to do everything possible to guarantee an optimal outcome. I mean, I don’t want to make a mistake.”

“Just tell her how you feel,” I said, looking up at Diamond Tiara. “That’s what she did, and I think it worked great, right?”

“But you were already at least somewhat interested, I think. At the very least, you never struck me as a particularly discerning type.”

“Hey!” I squeaked, suddenly sitting upright. “I’m plenty discerning.”

Tiara laughed and kissed my cheek. “Sweetie, one of the first things you wanted to do after we kissed was kiss your friends. There are a lot of wonderful things about you, but…”

“Fine,” I said, trying to think of how these things went in Rarity’s books. “Okay, what you need to do is… a really big romantic gesture. Like, something super awesome that immediately lets her know how much you care.”

Life Bloom raised an eyebrow. “Really? What makes you think that will work? It seems… risky.”

“Well, it usually works in Rarity’s stories,” I said, leaning back against Diamond Tiara. “Wait… no, that’s usually what the stallion does to get the mare back… They usually first start dating after some coincidence or something. You know, something light and fun and…”

“Tiara,” Life Bloom said, turning to look at my marefriend. “Is there any chance you have advice a bit more grounded? Perhaps not rooted in works of fiction?”

“Just because it’s fiction doesn’t mean it’s not true,” I said, frowning at her while Diamond Tiara went back to stroking my flank to reassure me.

“By definition, it does,” Life Bloom said, rolling her eyes at me before looking back at Diamond Tiara.

“I don’t know,” she said, idly tracing the outline of my cutie mark with her hoof. “I’d just tell her how you feel. If you want something, you should go after it, right?”

“Perhaps,” Life Bloom said, eyes darting to the ground as she bit lightly on her bottom lip, “but I can’t be sure I’ll–”

“Look,” I said, getting my thoughts together and trying to help both of my friends be happy together, “maybe you’ll crash and burn and Apple Bloom will say she doesn’t like you that way, and you’ll know you never ever had a chance, right?”

“That…” Life Bloom frowned and narrowed her eyes. “Are you trying to reassure me? Because I don’t think it’s working.”

Okay, so maybe I needed to work on my opening pitch, but I still had a point. “But even if all that bad stuff happens, if you’re nice and stuff, Apple Bloom will still like you. It’s like…” I laughed. Why was I the one telling her to be honest? That sounded like something she’d say. “Isn’t it better to know the answer for sure then just doubting yourself?”

“Wise words,” Life Bloom said, smiling and getting up on her hooves. “And something I should’ve remembered. Amazing how chemical imbalances in your brain can make you lose sight of core truths.”

“What?” I asked, tilting my head at her. “Could you speak less science-ey?”

“Of course,” she said, looking back at me. “What I’m saying is, at least in my case, my infatuation made me blind to something that should’ve been obvious. One might even say it made me act contrary to my nature.”

“Oh…” I said, nodding my head in understanding. “Well, it’s not all bad, it’s really fun too. Like, you wouldn’t believe how fun kissing is. Are you sure you don’t want me to–” Diamond Tiara tightened her grip on me and cut me off. Oh right, I was dating and couldn’t just offer to kiss ponies.

“Never mind,” I said, shaking my head. “I’m sure you’ll figure that out soon enough…” An idea entered my head. “Ooh! Tiara, if Life Bloom and Apple Bloom start dating, do you think we can have kissing parties to see who’s the better kisser? That could be really fun.”

“N-no,” Tiara said. “I’m dating you, I don’t want to kiss Life Bloom or Apple Bloom.”

“Why not?” I asked, frowning. “They’re both really nice, and if we both do it, then…”

“Their niceness isn’t the issue,” she said, pushing me off her. “I don’t like the idea of you dating somepony else, and I definitely don’t want to join in any weird kissing parties.”

“Even if it’ll be really fun?” I asked, frowning at her. Kissing parties shouldn’t even count as dating other ponies, it’s just fun everypony can join in on.

“I think I’ll have to decline the invitation as well,” Life Bloom said, frowning. “Although, increasing the sample size could dramatically increase my kissing ability later, while also noting other ponies’ techniques. Actually, I’ll have to think about it…”

Tiara cleared her throat. “That is, if your marefriend approves of you participating in such an activity. If not, I’m sure I can find another way to increase my sample size,” Life Bloom said, glancing from Tiara to me

I gave Tiara my best pleading look, and Tiara just sighed. “We can talk about it later, alright?”

“Is that all, then?” Life Bloom asked while I gave a squeak of excitement at the good news. I was barely paying attention to her as I planned out how fun all the kissing parties would be. The answer was: very.

Could I bring all of my friends to it? Maybe they’d even be fun enough that Scootaloo would stop being grumpy and we could all go back to having fun together and being friends. My head swam with images of the seven of us all kissing each other in a big clump in the clubhouse. Maybe we could even bring over more ponies… Ooh! We could invite the entire class and everypony could have fun kissing everypony else, and nopony would have any reason to fight.

Suddenly, a pair of warm berry-flavored lips pressed against mine, and I suddenly found myself transported from the clubhouse surrounded by my best friends to my bedroom where my super amazing and pretty marefriend was kissing me. Right, the kiss in my room was worth several hundred in the clubhouse, or something like that. I gave a little sigh and leaned into her kiss. 

“What was I thinking about, again?” I asked as she pulled away from me, a bead of berry-vanilla saliva momentarily connecting us before falling to the floor. At some point, Life Bloom had left the room, leaving the two of us behind.

Tiara smiled and shrugged. “Knowing you, probably something crazy or that involved kissing… possibly both.”

“Well,” I said, darting in to nibble on the tip of her ear that was apparently super sensitive. “I’m definitely thinking about kissing stuff now.”

She giggled and pulled me closer to her. “I was hoping you’d say that.”


***


        “I still don’t get your costume,” Tiara said as we walked out of the boutique. She had a golden tiara and fake pink horn on her head, and a matching pair of fake pink wings on her back.

        “I told you, I’m a robot,” I said, flipping the magic whirring contraption Rarity got me on. Err… zzdddt… boop. “It’s not that hard to get.” Beep boop.

        Tiara rolled her eyes. “I get that you’re a robot, I just don’t get why you’re a robot.”

        “I thought it would be funny,” I said, struggling to move in the silver-painted cardboard boxes that made up most of my costume. I guess it being so difficult to move in made the costume more authentic.

        “But why? What’s so funny about you being a robot? I just… I don’t get it,” she said, rolling her eyes at me before kissing my cheek.

        “Yeah, well, I don’t get why you’d dress up as Princess Cadence,” I said as we trudged towards the Crusader clubhouse. “I mean... “

        “Fine,” Diamond Tiara said. “If you think a costume idea is funny, I guess that’s as good a reason as any.”

        “And at least I’m not dressed up as something real,” I continued. “Can you imagine how weird it’d be if you actually ran into her while trick-or-treating?”

        “Why would I run into her while trick-or-treating?” Tiara asked, frowning as she leaned against my cardboard boxes.

        “Careful,” I said, pulling away from her. “You’ll dent them, and then nopony will know what I am because my costume’s ruined.”

        “I don’t think that’ll happen,” Tiara said, taking a step away from me. “You’d still be covered in that silver powder and… That’s going to take forever for you to wash it out.”

        “Will not,” I said as we entered the Apple Family’s orchards. “I mean, I can just ask Rarity to use one of her cleaning spells on me if it proves really tough to wash out.”

        “Right,” Tiara said, shaking her head, “I forget that unicorns have a spell for pretty much everything.”

        I nodded at her and there was a long pause as we tried to think of something to say. Normally, we’d fill the silence with kissing and touching, but the silver powder of my costume made it really difficult to hide anything we did. If Tiara showed up to the clubhouse with a silver hoof or silver lips, there weren’t many believable excuses we could come up with to explain it.

        “So…” I said, trying to figure out what to say. “Who do you think is going to have the best costume?”

        “You,” Tiara said, smiling at me. “Even if I don’t get why you’re a robot, you’ll still be the best looking pony there.”

        I blushed and really tried hard not to kiss her for that. If I did, then… we’d probably have to admit we were dating sooner than would be good. I could live with Scootaloo not being okay with it, since she apparently didn’t care about me, but… something told me Melody wouldn’t be happy. I don’t know why, but I couldn’t get past that little worry that… “Why can’t we tell everypony we’re dating yet?” I asked, glancing at Tiara.

        “Because I don’t want your friends to get upset with you,” she said. 

        “But they apparently already know,” I said, flicking an ear in irritation. If only Scootaloo and Melody don’t know we were dating, then what was the big deal? I didn’t really care about Scootaloo right now, and Melody… she said she didn’t have any feelings for me, so she wouldn’t be upset, right? Right?

        “Not all of them,” Tiara said, giving me her best reassuring smile. “I know Scootaloo’s being difficult, but I don’t want to make things worse between the two of you. I know how important her friendship is to you.”

        I shook my head. “Not anymore, I... “ I paused before telling her about our most recent fight. “I just can’t deal with her when she’s like this. I don’t know how to help, and everything I do seems to make things worse.”

        Tiara smiled and leaned in to kiss me before catching herself. “We can talk about it later, but… we should just focus on having fun tonight.”

        “You’re right,” I said, frowning at my own selfishness, “I almost… Ugh, that was so dumb of me, I shouldn’t just ignore what my friends think. What if I accidentally upset them? I was so focused on doing what I wanted, I almost completely forgot… I need to keep my friends happy. That’s what’s important, I can’t let my own feelings–” I stopped talking as we approached the clubhouse, not wanting my friends to accidentally overhear anything. “Oh hey, Tiara, how are you?”

        Tiara gave me a confused glance before looking up at the clubhouse and nodding at me. “Great,” she said. “Do you have any idea what Discord’s big Nightmare Night prank might be?”

        “No,” I said, shaking my head and recalling my conversation with Discord. “Apparently, last year, everypony turned into their costumes. I think–”

        A big booming voice came from the clubhouse, and I trotted up to the entrance to see Discord standing in the center of it. “And I promise, nopony will be harmed during my little prank tonight, you can all trick-or-treat without fear.”

        “Really?” I asked as I entered the clubhouse. “Because it sounds like last year–”

        “Last year, I made a few mistakes,” he said, interrupting me again. “I know, it’s stunning to think I’m anything less than perfect, but even I can err from time to time. Last year was one of those very few occasions, and one single pony was harmed because of that failure. I assure you, it won’t happen again.”

        “So this prank’ll be fun then?” Apple Bloom asked, tilting her head at Discord. “Can  you tell us what you’ve got planned?”

        Discord smiled and tapped Apple Bloom on the nose with one claw. “Now, now, I can’t make those promises, and I certainly don’t wish to spoil the surprise. All I can say is that tonight will be… interesting. I actually got the idea for this year’s prank from seeing Tavi and her marefriend together last Nightmare Night.”

        “But it sounded like last Nightmare Night was really bad for her,” I said, sitting on the opposite corner of the room as Scootaloo, the only pony in the room not in costume, while Diamond Tiara shuffled over near Life Bloom, who was wearing a lab coat and styled her mane so it was standing up almost straight. Was she supposed to be dressed up as some sort of scientist? Because that was pretty close to what she actually was. Can you even do that for Nightmare Night? Go as yourself?

        “It was,” Discord said, slithering around to face me. “But! It still gave me a wonderful idea for my next masterwork, and I believe tonight will be far more interesting than last year. Besides, if you don’t want to join the fun, you can just stay home.”

        “And not get any candy?!” I yelled, jumping up to my hooves. “Are you absolutely crazy? That’s like… Nightmare Night without candy is absolutely... I mean… free candy.”

        Discord’s face cracked open as laughter belted from his throat. “That’s the spirit,” he said, patting me on the head. “But if you want the prize, you have to play the game. And I promise, nothing harmful will happen to any of you who choose to go out tonight.”

        “Alright,” I said, slowly nodding my head and glancing between him, Diamond Tiara, and the rest of my friends. “Everypony else is coming with me, right?”

        Everypony but one nodded their heads. “I think I’ll pass,” Scootaloo said, giving a shrug. “Might as well… Not that big into candy, you know?”

        I growled at her and was about to say something not one-hundred percent nice when Discord cut me off. “Come now, Scootaloo, perhaps a night with your friends is just what you need to start feeling like your old self.”

        “And just how’d you know I was… What makes you think I’m not feeling normal?” she asked, slowly turning to face the dracone… drak…

        “Hey, Discord, how do you spell your name?” I asked before he could respond.

        “D-I-S-C-O-R-D, Sweetie Belle,” he said before turning back to look at Scootaloo. “Oh come now, Scootaloo, you don’t think I’d recognize the signs of a pony not in harmony with herself? That’s practically my name… In fact, it is my name.” He laughed again. Discord laughed a lot, almost as much as Pinkie did. Or me. “Still, you can’t go trick-or-treating without a costume… Ooh! I know!” He snapped his finger and Scootaloo was dressed up in a Wonderbolt’s dress uniform: a military-blue coat, light blue shirt, a bunch of shiny medals, and a pair of aviator glasses. “There, just like mommy dearest.”

        Scootaloo looked at herself and her face went bright red. “That’s not funny,” she snarled, trying to rip the costume off but finding it stuck to her body.

        “Come now, you can’t take the costume off until after Nightmare Night’s over,” Discord said, wagging a claw at her. “Besides, if anypony could benefit from my little prank, it’s you. Speaking of, a riddle for you, my little ponies: If my prank, early, you seek to undo, then to yourselves, you must be true.” He smiled and gave a flourish. “That goes for everypony here, by the way. Consider it a treat to counter my trick. Now if you’ll excuse me, I really have to be getting ready. It simply won’t do if I’m seen without my costume.”

        “Wait, you’re wearing a costu–” I tried to say before he snapped his claws and disappeared in a puff of magic. How could he cut me off just by disappearing?

“Hey, you girls ready to go trick-or-treating?” Socket asked as he flew in through the window. He hovered in the air and looked around, his eyes finally settling on Scootaloo, still desperately trying to rip the costume off. “Did I… Did I miss something?”

“Just Discord being really cryptic,” I said, frowning. Why was Scootaloo so upset with her costume? I mean, I get that she couldn’t fly, but… she wouldn’t get that upset, and what did Discord mean by–

“Really?” Socket asked, landing on the floor and cutting off my thought. Was everypony just going to keep interrupting me tonight? It’s like I couldn’t go one second without–

“Yep,” Apple Bloom said. “Apparently he did something that really upset Scootaloo.”

“It’s this stupid costume,” Scootaloo said, still struggling to tear it off. “I don’t want… Is this some kind of sick joke from him? What did I do to tick him off?”

“Uhmm… I’m sorry if this is a bad time, but I really don’t see what’s so bad about the costume beyond the obvious fact,” Melody said, poking her head out of her shell. She’d decided to dress as a turtle for Nightmare Night, and it actually kind of went well with her coat color. I don’t get why she’d want to dress as a turtle, though.

“You mean the fact that she can’t fly,” I said, immediately regretting my words as Scootaloo spun around to glare at me. I know it wasn’t the nicest thing to say, but a little bit of me… I don’t know, she’d been so difficult lately, and maybe for a split second, I wanted to be difficult back. 

“Sorry,” I mumbled, crumbling under the weight of Scootaloo’s glare. How come she could be as big a jerk as she wanted, but the second I tried it, I felt instantly terrible? Was I just supposed to be Miss Polite while Scootaloo kept lashing out at me?

“Yeah,” Scootaloo said slowly. “Doesn’t sound like there needs to be a reason beyond the obvious to me, I can’t fly, and Discord thought it’d be funny to dress me up as one of Equestria’s best fliers.” She gave another growl. “Anyways, since I apparently have to celebrate this stupid holiday, we might as well go and get it over with.”

I gave a squeal of excitement at the thought of free candy and suddenly found everypony in the room staring at me. “Sorry,” I said, feeling my cheeks get warm. “I just… It’s free candy, girls and Socket. It’s really hard for me to not be happy right now.”

“It’s alright,” Life Bloom said, a small smile forming on her lips. “Your enthusiasm is a wonderful antidote for…” She trailed off, glancing at Scootaloo, who was too busy leading the group out of the clubhouse to pay attention to us. “Well, your almost overwhelming joy is always refreshing. At least, it is when it isn’t making me question my sanity.”

“Thanks,” I said, nodding as Socket landed next to us. He’d dyed his coat green and had a bolt sticking out of his neck.

“So, LB,” he said, looking at my friend. “What’re you dressed up as?”

Life Bloom rolled her eyes. “I find it hard to imagine that you don’t know what I’m dressed up as, considering I’m your creator.”

“Oh,” he said, tilting his head at her. “So you’re the scientist who created Frankenstein? Cool. What was her name, anyways?”

“Frankenstein,” Life Bloom said, gritting her teeth. “I’m dressed up as Frankenstein, you’re dressed up as the monster.”

“The creature,” Melody said from behind us, causing us all to look back at her. “It’s… Frankenstein’s the monster, not the creature.”

“That’s…” Life Bloom raised up her eyebrows and stopped in her tracks. “Either I’m incredibly confused, or that’s… I didn’t expect you to say something so insightful.”

“It’s nothing,” Melody said, smiling faintly. “Mare Shelley is just really popular at my house, and… actually, one of my earliest memories is sneaking Frankenstein into my bedroom and staying up all night reading it.”

Life Bloom was about to say something when my laughter drowned her out. “And just what’s so funny?” she asked between bouts of my giggling.

“It’s just…” I snorted from giggling. In the corner of my vision, I saw Diamond Tiara struggling not to roll her eyes. “We have Frankenstein, the creature, and a shelley mare.” I pointed at Melody to make sure they got my joke before going back to giggling. “Get it?”

“Unfortunately, I do,” Life Bloom said. “You should feel absolutely terrible for that pun, by the way. It’s possibly the worst I ever heard.”

“Is not,” I said as my last wave of giggling finished. “You know deep down it was funny.”

“It was only funny because it was so incredibly bad,” Diamond Tiara said, joining our group and giving me a small smile. Of course, she thought it was funny, she just couldn’t be seen agreeing with me around my friends all the time.

“I liked it,” Melody said. “It was... “ She trailed off. “I liked it.”

“Huh… where did Apple Bloom and Scootaloo go?” I asked, looking around for any trace of my friends– I mean, my friend and Scootaloo. They must not have noticed we had stopped walking.

“I don’t know,” Life Bloom said, frowning. Suddenly, the two of us tensed up as we sensed the crackle of magic in the air. My horn tingled as the air around me suddenly swam with magic, and it almost felt like when Diamond Tiara kissed my horn. My eyes rolled up towards the sky at the sensation as the magic in the air increased, and my knees felt like they’d turned to jello. It hadn’t even started yet, but Discord’s prank was completely super amazing. 

Melody and Tiara were yelling at each other about something, but it seemed really small and unimportant, like a tiny insect buzzing next to my ear. I closed my eyes in the hopes of stretching this moment out forever. Everything was just so perfect, even Melody and Tiara had gone quiet. I guess there was enough magic in the air for them to notice it now.

The sensation of magic in the air vanished, and I opened my eyes, both curious to see what had happened and way too happy to really care. Whatever Discord’s prank was, it couldn’t have been that–

I froze, instantly recognizing the pair of pine-green eyes staring at me. I’d seen them plenty of times the last few weeks. Seen them whenever I had to check my reflection. The other pony’s white coat and purple-pink mane made her identity even more obvious. I looked at my friends and saw that they’d also doubled when my eyes were closed. This… could be interesting? I had twice as many friends tonight, so that was great! I could even talk with myself and see what was on my mind.

“So, me,” I said, smiling at myself, “what do you want to do? We were going to go trick-or-treating, but–”

I was interrupted – Again? Seriously? – as my lips pressed against mine. Was it cheating if I kissed myself? Because… apparently my double (and possibly me) is an awesome kisser. Like, apparently, I knew just what I liked.

My double pulled away from me, smiling as she did, while I stared at her in a mix of shock and something else I couldn’t quite recognize. My friends and their doubles had stopped staring at each other and turned to look at me and my other self. 

The other me giggled as she noticed the other ponies’ stares and she flashed them another smile. “So,” she/me said, “which of you wants to kiss me first?”

“I do!” Melody’s double said (it was definitely the double; she wasn’t dressed in a costume) as she bounded towards the other me. In a second, their lips were pressed against the other’s, and a series of soft moans and squeaks came from… one of them.

“I’m really sorry,” the real Melody said, “I don’t know why I’m acting this way. You know I–”

“Oh stop it,” the other Melody said, pulling away from the other me for a second. The other me used the break to kiss all over other Melody’s neck. “You’ve spent the last two months dreaming about this, and I’m not going to listen to you say that you haven’t been fantasizing about this opportunity.”

I looked at the real Melody, whose cheeks were as red as Apple Bloom’s mane. “Is that… you said you didn’t like me.”

Melody looked down at the ground while the other Melody went back to kissing the other Sweetie. “I do, just not… I…” Melody squeaked, while her counterpart just groaned.

“She’s lying,” the other Melody said. “Your stupid friend told her you were freaking out because you thought she had a crush on you, so Melody decided the only possible solution was to act like she didn’t like–” She was cut off as the other Diamond Tiara – the one not dressed as a princess – tackled her.

“Don’t you dare kiss my marefriend,” other Tiara said. “She’s mine, nopony else’s.” I… What did she mean about… Who told her to back off? What was going on?

“I can’t bear this waiting anymore,” the other Life Bloom said. “Our true love is somewhere out there, probably alone and scared, we have to go rescue her. Apple Bloom! We’re coming!” She sprinted down the path leading to town, the real Life Bloom chasing after her a second later.

“Uhmm…” Socket said as Other Tiara and Other Melody continued to fight with each other. “I should probably go and see if Life Bloom is all right.”

“You fool!” his double said, following after the real Socket as they both headed to town. “You waste your time on others, when we could instead combine the two greatest minds on earth. Equestria has yet to recognize our genius, but an army of robots will surely persuade them!”

“Please,” Other Sweetie begged of the real Melody. “I know you like me, so can we just kiss? I’ll show you something that feels really fun… At least, it does for me, it will probably feel good for you too.”

The real Melody just stared at her, horror, fear, and desire wrestling for control of her face. The other me kissed her neck, causing Melody to go completely rigid. “Okay,” Other Sweetie said, “now I want you to wrap your lips around my horn.” She smiled and pressed her lips against Melody’s, as the horror grew in Melody’s eyes.

“Stop it!” I snapped at myself. “Can’t you see this isn’t making her happy? This is… It’s wrong.”

“Who cares?” Other Sweetie said, turning from Melody to look at me, a wicked smile on her face. “The only pony who worries about that junk is you. You worry so much about what your friends will like, but what have they ever done for you? Let’s stop worrying about what they’ll like and instead focus on what we like.” She pounced on top of me, and before I could figure out what I should do, I felt her lips around my horn tip. Suddenly, I was a lot less concerned with getting her off me.

“See,” Other Sweetie said as I went limp. “This is way better than worrying and freaking out about other ponies. We can totally have our own fun.”

“But… I want my friends to be happy,” I said, feeling like my tongue was made of lead while Other Sweetie went back to kissing my horn. Maybe just laying on the ground for a bit wouldn’t be too terrible.

“Yeah, well, why?” Other Sweetie said as I tried to keep my back leg from twitching. “Wouldn’t it be more fun if they focused on making you happy? Think of all the fun things they could do with you. Do for you… Diamond Tiara was right when she said you deserve to be happy. Our happiness is the greatest thing in the world.”

I looked at the real Diamond Tiara, hoping she’d say something, but instead she just stared at the sight of me on top of me. “Remember the night you got drunk and made out with Diamond Tiara? Remember how absolutely fun that night was? Imagine if we brought in Melody to our kissing games. I know you want to.”

“That…” I slowly nodded, trying to get my brain to put words in front of other words. “It doesn’t matter what I want, it’s about what she wants.”

Other Me laughed at that. “She doesn’t know what she wants.” She pointed a hoof at Melody, who was still standing perfectly still, staring at me… or us, I guess. Melody had the same look on her face that Diamond Tiara did. “They both want us, Sweetie, let’s have some fun with them.”

“Absolutely not,” Other Tiara said, pushing Other Melody away and getting up on her hooves. “Sweetie’s mine, you’re both mine, that means you do what I want you to do, and I’m not going to share you.”

Other Me pouted at her. “Oh, come on, we’re not even dating really. You don’t get a say in what I can and can’t do. Besides, if we were dating, I’m pretty sure I could find a way to change your mind.” She gave Other Tiara a smile that burned like lightning, and I felt a tingle of excitement run up my spine. Is that… Is it weird that her smile gave me the same feeling kissing Diamond Tiara did?

“See,” Other Sweetie said as Other Tiara’s eyes lost their focus. “Deep down, you just want to make me happy.” She leaned in close and nuzzled at Other Tiara’s neck. “Now could you please kiss my horn? I promise I’ll make it up to you.”

The other Tiara just nodded her head before moving to wrap her lips around the tip of Other Me’s horn. Other Me giggled and kissed Other Tiara’s cheek. “Good girl. I knew you could make me happy.” She looked at the other Melody who was slowly getting up on her hooves. “Now, Tia, don’t you think adding others to our herd can be… rewarding?” She whispered something in Other Tiara’s ear and the smile on her face grew.

“You make a good point,” Other Tiara said, staring through Other Melody. “If you want to kiss Sweetie, that’s okay, but you have to kiss me first.” I really don’t like Other Me. She’s not anything like me.

Other Melody tilted her head for a minute before nodding. “If I get to kiss Sweetie, then I can kiss you.”

“Great!” Other Sweetie said, clapping her hooves together. “That just leaves the three of you to take care of.” She gave a squeal of delight and whirled around to look at all of us. “This is going to be so much fun.” She flashed us all her electric smile that threatened to burn me up, and the three real ponies took a step back and glanced at each other. We didn’t need to say anything before we sprinted off towards Ponyville and as far away from the other me as possible.


***


        “What they hay?” the real Tiara asked as we ran to Ponyville. “Sweetie, I… I really like you, but that other you is kind of evil.”

        “I know,” I screamed between gulps of air. “She’s just… I don’t understand why she’s like that.” I glanced back behind me to see if they were following us and couldn’t see any sign of them. “Maybe we can hide from them in the bakery.”

        “No,” Melody said from beside me. “I’m pretty sure they’re still us, just… twisted a bit. We have to think of hiding somewhere we wouldn’t think of hiding in.”

        “How… in Equestria… can you think that pony’s… anything like me?” I asked, as we pushed ourselves through the empty side streets of Ponyville. The main square was probably filled with celebrators and their doubles. Actually, if their doubles were as terrible as ours, how come the whole town wasn’t freaking out? Were we just really unlucky?

        “Well, you did say… you wanted to… consider dating other ponies.” Diamond Tiara said. “And I had a problem with the idea… Maybe... “ She trailed off as she struggled to keep up with Melody, who didn’t even seem a little winded. How was the pony dressed as a turtle the fastest in our group?

        “Yeah, but only if…” I saw our hope on the top of a hill just outside of town. “Come on! I know where we can hide.” I pushed myself forward as fast as I could as I headed towards a place I knew I’d never think of looking for myself… Unless… if I could think of hiding there because I knew I wouldn’t look there, could I also think of looking there because I knew I’d never…

        “Sweetie!” Tiara said from several dozen paces in front of me, and pulling me out of my head. When did she get so far ahead of me, and when did I stop moving? “Come on, we can’t stop now. We… I really don’t want to spend time with the other you.”

        I shook my head and followed after her. I could think of whether I could think of looking for me in a place I’d never think of looking for me at later. At least, I could if I didn’t get stuck thinking of… Ugh! Thinking about what I would and wouldn’t do was really hard, especially when I had to think about what two me’s would do. Right, I thought as I followed my friends, let’s get somewhere safe first, and then we can think about the weirdness of the situation later. We don’t want to get caught by us.


***


        We threw the door to the old schoolhouse open to find we weren’t the only ponies who thought of hiding in there. Scootaloo cowered in the corner as Other Scootaloo yelled at her. (Thankfully, our doubles weren’t wearing our costumes too, otherwise I would be completely lost) “I just don’t get it!” Other Scootaloo yelled. “I know it stinks we can’t fly, but we always knew that was a possibility. It’s like…” She ran a hoof through her mane. “Rainbow Dash said it might not happen, and she also said we’re still pretty awesome, so why in Equestria did–” She stopped and spun around to look at us as a flashbulb smile lit up her face. “Sweetie! You’re here, I’m so… why are you out of breath?”

        “Other Me… is… completely… crazy,” I panted as I slammed the door shut and Melody and Tiara moved to bar it with whatever chairs and tables were close by.

        “Really?” Other Scootaloo asked. “She should still be kind of like you, so I can’t imagine her being that bad. Maybe a bit clingy, but…”

        “She’s nothing like me,” I said, raising my voice at my friend (my real friend, not the pony who replaced her). “All she cares about is what she wants, and I think she mind-controlled the other Tiara and Melody.”

        “Uhmm… she didn’t,” Melody said as she finished barricading the door. “I mean, she didn’t mind control the other me. I… The real me almost took her up on her offer, the only reason I didn’t was because she wasn’t really the pony I liked, she just looked like her.”

Oh right, now I had that to worry about. “You said you didn’t like me.” I said, panting as I turned from Scootaloo to look at Melody. “If I’d known, I would have… You know, I would’ve… why didn’t you tell me?”

        “Because Scootaloo told me not to,” she said, frowning and looking at Tiara. “She told us not to.”

        “No,” Diamond Tiara said slowly, “Scootaloo told us we were stressing Sweetie Belle out and said if we cared for her we should back off, and that’s what I did: I backed off, told her there was no pressure, and gave her space until she decided she wanted to go out with me, right Sweetie?”

        I nodded at her, still trying to think about what happened. Were they saying what I… “Scootaloo, did you tell them not to go out with me?”

        The other Scootaloo (the one I knew) shook her head while the real one just glowered. “No,” Other Scootaloo said, “I told them you were freaking out and said if they really cared about you they’d give you some space. It was… I did it to help you, and I never told them to lie to you.” At the last few words, she glanced at Melody.

        “Is that why you’ve been avoiding me the last few months?” I asked, looking at Melody (I felt a top, spinning around to look at all my friends).

        Melody nodded. “I just didn’t want to upset you, and I thought if me saying I didn’t like you made you feel better…”

        I smiled at her. “Well, you didn’t have to, I’m sure we can work something out, right Tiara?” So, Other Me might be crazy and kind of scary, but calling Tiara “Tia” was actually a kind of great idea. I’d have to check with her later and make sure the nickname was okay with her.

        “You already know what I want and am willing to put up with,” Tiara said as she pulled the blinds shut. “Just don’t…” She shook her head. “You know I don’t think of you as my property, right, Sweetie?”

        “Of course,” I said, trotting up behind her and kissing the back of her neck. “Why would I ever even think that?”

        “Because the other me…” She trailed off, and I laughed.

        “Tiara, you saw what the other me is like, right? I’m not even sure why they look like us if they’re going to act completely different than we do. They aren’t us.”

        “Uhh… we kind of are,” the other Scootaloo said from her spot next to the “real” Scootaloo. “At least, I am. I think… I’m not sure how to put it.”

        “You’re a part of her she doesn’t want to acknowledge,” Melody said, sitting against the pile of chairs and tables that blocked the front door.

        “Yeah,” Other Scootaloo said, nodding her head, “That’s exactly what I am. I’m all the stuff she doesn’t want to admit she is. How’d you know?”

        “Because…” she bit her lip. “I think that’s what all of the doubles are. At least, that’s what mine is.”

        “But you’re not… You know, like her,” I said, frowning. The doubles couldn’t be us. Mine was nothing like me. She was completely selfish and a little crazy and she manipulated her “friends” to get what she wanted and… I was nothing like that.

        “I am though,” Melody said. “Maybe I don’t do those things, but I still want to. I wanted to tell you how I felt, and sometimes I want to just… say what’s really on my mind, instead of just going with what everypony around me is saying. I guess… I just don’t because I don’t want to be mean or accidentally hurt somepony’s feelings.”

        Was I seeing things? I could swear her coat actually glowed while she was talking, but the second she stopped talking, everything went back to how it should be. I rubbed my eyes and looked at her again, and she definitely looked how she normally did. Maybe I was just stressed, that was… that was probably it.

        “You’re both wrong,” Scootaloo said from her corner. “These doubles aren’t us, and if they are, they’re wrong.” She glared at her double. “I’m not… You’re not me, okay? You’re just a joke, something I thought I could be back before I learned my friends were all lying to me and that I could never fly.”

        “Oh, don’t even start with that,” Other Scootaloo said, rolling her eyes. “Yeah, your friends lied to you, but guess what, you lied to your friends, too. And yeah, you can’t fly, but so what? We’re still pretty awesome, or at least, we would be if you could just accept the fact. Instead, you’ve been making all our friends miserable because… because you’re a chicken!”

        “Am not!” Scootaloo said jumping up to her hooves.

        “Oh? So you’re not a cowardly flightless bird? I thought that’s what you’ve been complaining about this entire time,” Other Scootaloo said, matching Scootaloo’s glare with her own. How come we all had kind of crazy doubles, but Scootaloo had a double that was basically who she used to be? Then again, Diamond Tiara’s double was also who she used to be, so…

        Ugh! That still didn’t explain why my double wasn’t anything like me? I wasn’t scary or crazy, and… yeah, I wanted to date other ponies, but I didn’t want to manipulate them into dating me. 

        “That’s! That’s completely not fair,” Scootaloo said. “How come you’re rubbing the fact that I can’t fly into my face? Aren’t you supposed to be me?”

        Other Scootaloo rolled her eyes while I tried to move to get a better view of their fight. What? This was interesting, and maybe I could get the old Scootaloo back. That would be… I wanted a good view if that happened. “I’m not rubbing it in your face, I just accept it. If I wanted to be mean, I’d tell you our parents abandoned us, but we both know that’s not true.”

        “Yeah… but they didn’t let us move in with them when we asked. They don’t want us around because… because we’re a disappointment.” Okay, so maybe this was a bit personal to be listening in on, like, I didn’t even know who Scootaloo’s parents were, and if they abandoned her… It’s not a nice feeling. Not that I… my parents didn’t abandon me, they love me, but they also wanted to travel, and I wanted to stay here for school, and Rarity said she could look after me, and… It’s not like they abandoned me, they were going to be back in a few weeks for Hearth’s Warming.

        “No,” Other Scootaloo said, “that’s not what they said, and you know it. Mom wants us to think things over before we do anything, and she doesn’t want to see you throw your life in Ponyville away because of a fight. I don’t want to see you throw your life in Ponyville away because of a fight. Especially since… you know the whole getting upset with Sweetie thing was for the absolute dumbest reason possible.”

        “It was not!” Scootaloo yelled. “I didn’t want to see my friend turn into some girly-girl, and it turns out I was right and…” She paused, realization entering into her eyes. “She and Tiara are dating. That’s... How could she do that to me?”

        “Uhmm, I didn’t do anything to you,” I said, speaking up for myself and earning a nod from Other Scootaloo. “I wanted to tell you earlier, but we’ve spent the last month fighting or not talking or whatever you want to call this, and I hate it! You’re my best friend, and I really want to tell you everything, but if you’re going to keep yelling at me, then why should I tell you anything?”

        The real Scootaloo sighed and it looked like she turned gray. “I guess you’re right. Some friend I turned out to be, huh?” Ugh, then there was the flipside to the super-angry Scootaloo of the last month, the one who wouldn’t stop pitying herself and talking about what a failure she was. 

        “Stop it right now,” Other Scootaloo said, jumping between Scootaloo and me. “You know what’s even less awesome than you lashing out at your friends? This, and I’m not going to let you do it tonight. You… You’re not a bad pony. You aren’t a failure. You’re surrounded by ponies that love and support you, and it’s complete B.S. that you’re doing this to them. That’s not what good friends do.”

        Scootaloo opened her mouth to say something, but Other Scootaloo cut her off. At least I wasn’t the only one getting interrupted tonight. “No! Don’t start that either. You are a good friend, or at least, you know how to be one. Yeah, it stinks that you can’t fly, but it didn’t take away your ability to choose. It didn’t take away your ability to be the best version of yourself you possibly can.” 

Other Scootaloo grabbed the sides of Scootaloo’s face and stared her dead in the eye. “You can choose, Scootaloo. Choose which pony you want to be. I know it’s easy to give up, to say you never had a chance and just moan about it forever, but...  there’s another option; you can choose to be better. Choose to be the best pony you possibly can. Yeah, it’ll be hard. A lot harder than just whining. But hey, when did we ever do the easy thing?”

Scootaloo stared at herself for a long time, before a look entered her eyes. It was a good look. The look that led to us getting covered in tree sap or stuck in a taffy-pulling machine or chased by sharks or burning a building down. Okay, it didn’t sound like a good look, but it meant that– 

        “Yeah, alright,” Scootaloo said, her eyes glinting with determination while I tried not to smile. “I’m gonna do it. I… I might be…” She frowned for a second. “I might have some bad days, but I’m not gonna give up. I might not be able to fly, but I’m better with a scooter than pretty much everypony, even…” She started to laugh. “I’m better than Rainbow Dash at something, and I can be so much better. I can be better on my scooter, I can…” She turned to look at me and flashed me a smile that was half-apology, half-bravado. “I can definitely be a better friend.” Her coat glowed orange and her other self faded away. 

“I can’t fly, but that doesn’t have to stop me from being awesome, right?” She looked back at where her other self was to find an empty space, while I stared at her flank – or, more accurately, stared at the wheel and lightning bolt on top of a pink heart that had suddenly appeared on her flank.

“Scootaloo!” I said as I ran towards my friend. She had just enough time to look at me before I tackled her to the ground. “You’re back! I mean, you were always here, but you’re… and you… Your cutie mark! And… Oh my gosh! We need to get Pinkie to throw you a party, but not just any party, it has to be a we’re-sorry-for-lying-to-you party, a cuteceaňara, and… It has to be a hundred parties in one!”

My friend tried to squirm out of my grip, but I wasn’t about to let that happen yet. Suddenly, she stopped and just looked at me. “Wait, are you saying I got my–” I nodded. “And… you forgive me just like that? After how rotten I’ve been?”

“Of course,” I said, letting go of her and springing up to my hooves. “You’re back, and who can be angry when you just got your cutie mark? I mean, you have to be so excited. I remember how excited I was when I got my cutie mark and–”

I was cut off as she shoved her hoof in my mouth. “Yeah, having my cutie mark is great,” she said, glancing at her flank. “Not exactly how I imagined getting it though… Like, I didn’t even do anything, I just said stuff.”

“Ehuffhuufhuuf,” I said, her hoof still in my mouth. “Eeeoouhoofouomymoof.”

“Right,” she said as she pulled her hoof out of my mouth. “Sorry, what did you say?”

“I said ‘it’s the epiphany.’ Apparently, doing something isn’t the big reason you get your cutie mark; you have to realize something about yourself. It’s funny, right? We spent all that time doing all that crazy random stuff, and apparently that’s like the worst way to try and get your cutie mark,” I said, smiling at her.

“And… you’re forgiving me, just like that?” Scootaloo asked, frowning. “I mean, I’m glad you are, but I was… I haven’t been the nicest pony lately.”

“Yeah, but it’s Sweetie Belle,” Diamond Tiara said, looking out the school’s window with Melody. “She’d probably forgive you if you burned her house down.”

“Only if she’s sorry,” I said, glancing back at her. “And Scootaloo’s sorry, right?”

Scootaloo nodded. “See?” I said. “Besides, I should apologize for not supporting you enough… I mean, I did kind of yell back a few times,” I said, frowning for a second. “Scootaloo, I’m sorry for–”

She shoved her hoof back in my mouth and I rolled my eyes. Really? At this point, it was almost a running joke. Could I maybe finish one thought tonight without being interrupted? “You don’t need to apologize,” Scootaloo said. “None of this would’ve happened if I hadn’t been so… well, you know…” I nodded at her. “Look, Sweetie, if you want to wear makeup, that’s awesome, and there’s nothing wrong with that. I should’ve... “ She smiled at me. “I should’ve realized that earlier, but I guess I just didn’t want to admit things had changed.”

“But they haven’t,” I said, spitting her hoof out of my mouth. “The only thing that’s changed is we both got our cutie marks, and… I’m dating Diamond Tiara, so I guess that’s two things, but that’s it!”

Scootaloo’s smile turned into the same smile Rarity gave me whenever I talked about what I hoped Santa Hooves would get me for Christmas. What did this have to do with Santa Hooves? “Of course, Sweetie Belle, I… it just took me a while to realize that. Forgive me for being such an idiot?”

“Well, duh,” I said. “I think everypony’s an idiot now and then. Even Miss Twilight acts like an idiot occasionally, and she’s pretty much the smartest pony eve–”

“Sweetie, we have a problem,” Diamond Tiara said, and seriously? Again? “You found us.”

“Uh, of course I did,” I said, rolling my eyes at her. “I mean, I never lost you. The only ponies I lost tonight were…” I trailed off as I figured out what she meant. “Oh.”

Tiara nodded and returned my eye roll as I walked up next to her to look out the window. I kind of deserved that one. “Yeah, what were you saying about everypony being an idiot now and then?” she asked as I tilted the blinds to see the two ponies standing outside the schoolhouse entrance.

“Ohhh, Sweeeetttieee,” the other me sing-songed while pirouetting right in front of our window. Immediately to her side stood Diamond Tiara… or the other Diamond Tiara. “Whatever happened to my dear playmate Melody? I was so looking forward to spending time with her tonight.” She smiled and sneered at once. “I suppose I’ll just have to find some other amusement for the night. Perhaps you’ll be amenable? It’s not cheating if it’s with yourself.”

Okay, making out with yourself, that was pretty creepy right? Sure, it would probably be really fun, because she knows pretty much everything I like, but… I shook my head. Nope, it was definitely creepy. Fun, but creepy. 

“Wait, what happened to Melody?” I asked. “We haven’t seen the other her, it’s just been the four of us. Well, five, but then Scootaloo…” I stopped as I remembered Discord’s earlier riddle and the way Melody seemed to glow when she explained why the other her was still kind of her. “I think I know how we can make her doubles disappear.”

Tiara rolled her eyes. “You just figured that out? I thought it was kind of obvious that–”

“Bored now,” Other Sweetie said, violently pulling the doors to the schoolhouse open. Oh, right, they went both ways… Kind of should’ve thought of that before we barricaded ourselves in. “Come on, Sweetie, the night’s already a few hours old and I’ve hardly had any fun. This is my night, and I’m not going to have you ruin it like you ruin everything else.”

“I do not,” I said, yelling back at her as she pushed the furniture away, Other Tiara following in her hoofsteps.

Other Me rolled her eyes. “Yes you do, it’s always about other ponies and making them happy. We almost drove ourselves crazy trying to make both Melody and Tiara happy, but you never asked yourself what you wanted. What I wanted.”

“That… That’s not true,” I stammered, taking a step back from her. “Wanting to date both Tiara and Melody, that was for me.”

“No,” she said, sighing while I retreated  away from her. “That was for them, sure I’d like it… I’d really like it a lot.” She glanced to Melody and the real Tiara. “Actually, maybe we can talk with them about it later, but right now… Right now, you’re going to do something for yourself. Right now, you’re going to put your needs above somepony else’s.” She gave a smile that made my stomach twist. “Tonight, you’re going to show your friends how selfish you really are.”

“Leave her alone,” Scootaloo said, jumping between me and the other me. “What’s your deal anyways? Can’t you see you’re scaring her… or you, or… this is actually kind of confusing.”

“I know,” I said from my spot behind her. “I’ve been trying to figure out what our relationship is with our doubles all night.”

“Don’t care,” Other Me sing-songed. “Oh, and Scootaloo, unless you want to join me in having fun tonight, you should get out of my way, because I’m not about to let you ruin my night out.” She glanced at me. “Sweetie, dear, if Scootaloo doesn’t get out of my way or start kissing me in five seconds, I’m going to start telling ponies every dirty nasty mean little thought you ever had about them. Won’t that be fun?”

Did I just blackmail myself? That hardly seemed fair. “You’re going to indulge yourself tonight, Sweetie Belle, no point in fighting it.” She gave me the same smile Rarity’s cat gave as it pounced on its toy mouse. “I promise it’ll be fun.”

I gave a sigh. What could I do? If I didn’t go along with what Other Me wanted,  she’d tell my friends all my secrets, and then I wouldn’t have any friends anymore, and then how could I make anypony happy? “Get out of her way, Scootaloo, I… maybe if I give her what she wants, she’ll go away.”

“Are… are you sure?” Scootaloo asked, looking back at me while Other Me’s face lit up. I just nodded at my friend. 

“Yeah, I… I don’t know what she’ll say, and I don’t want her to upset you all.” Why was other me such a jerk? It’s… I couldn’t be that selfish, could I?

“There you go, talking about what other ponies want again,” Other Me said, grinning hungrily as she paced past Scootaloo. “Mhmm, I promise I’ll break you of that bad little habit by the time tonight’s over. Ooh, let me unlock the pony you always secretly wanted to be in front of all our friends. If you do this for me, if you show the world how selfish you can really be, I promise I’ll disappear.” She giggled. “There won’t be any need for me then. Now, be a good girl and kiss my horn like Tiara does it. I promise I’ll treat you once you’re done.”

Maybe if I just did what she wanted, she’d go away. That’s how it worked for the others, right? They accepted something about themselves and their doubles disappeared. Maybe if I did something I wanted that–

Wait. Was I that dumb? “No,” I said, trying to stare my other self in the eye with as much bravery as I could.

“Excuse me?” Other Me said, raising an eyebrow. “You’re still going to deny what you want, even when it will hurt your friends? Are you stupid or crazy?”

It depended on who you asked, I guess. I mean, I definitely wasn’t the smartest of my friends, and I could be a bit silly at times, but–

“Well?” Other Sweetie asked, still staring at me – what was the word? Contemptuously?

Oh right, I had to deal with her. “Neither,” I said, my face breaking out in a smile. “In fact, you’re right, I should be more concerned with my own happiness, and do you know what would make me super happy right now?” Her face somehow went paler than white. Actually, she almost looked kind of translucent. “Not kissing you.” 

I tried not to laugh at her. Just because I was doing what I wanted didn’t mean I had to be mean about it, even if Other Sweetie was kind of a jerk. I might have laughed a little though. “Oh! And before you go, you should know I’m not going to be anything like you. Yes, I really want to date Diamond Tiara and Melody and maybe some other ponies, and I’d definitely like to host huge kissing parties, but I’m not going to make ponies uncomfortable while doing it… You can get what you want without making other ponies feel bad.” 

I struck my best dramatic pose. If I was going to monologue, I might as well do it with style. “I am Sweetie Belle, I have wants and needs, and I’m not going to be shy about expressing them, but I’m not going to start hurting my friends. I can get what I want without being anything like you.” With that, the other me vanished into thin air, and I felt a warmth bubble up in my chest. I smiled at Tiara and Melody. “I like both of you a lot, and I think it would be nice if we could–”

“Absolutely not,” Other Tiara said, jumping between me and the rest of my friends and interrupting me for the three-hundredth time that night. “You’re mine to play with, and I’m not going  to share you with anypony.” She glared at Melody. “You want to date her, you do what I say. I want to hear you say you’re mine to do with as I please, you understand? Daddy could buy all of you if he wanted to.”

The real Tiara sighed and shook her head. “Since I’ve heard you all accept some terrible part of yourself, I suppose…” She took a deep breath. “This isn’t going to be easy.”

Tiara smiled at me, tears stinging her eyes. “Sweetie, I’m really trying to be better, but it’s hard for me to stop thinking of you as mine, and I hate the idea of you dating somepony else. I’m trying to be okay with it and support it, but deep down, the very thought of kissing somepony else just makes me sick, and I don’t know how to balance it. I don’t know how to be a better pony and be true to myself, but I’m trying.” She glared at her other self. “And no matter what, I’m not going to go back to being her. Yes, she’s still a part of me, no matter how much I’d wish otherwise, but she’s not all I am anymore, and… I want to be better.” She gave me a tiny smile as her other self faded away, leaving behind four fillies who’d just admitted their dark side to everypony. For a few minutes, we all found the floor super interesting.

My friends had just gone through and faced their inner demons, and what they… what we all needed right now was some cheering up. Luckily, they had me, and I had Nightmare Night.

“So,” I said, looking up from the floor. “It’s still Nightmare Night, let’s go find the rest of our friends and get as much free candy as we can.”

“Really?” Melody asked, poking her head out of her shell. “After all that, you still want to go trick-or-treating?”

“Duh,” I said, “I’m not going to pass up the one night a year we can get free candy just because I had to face some unpleasant truth about myself. If anything, that just makes me want candy more, because what cheers you up like candy? I mean, besides ice cream, but there’s no free ice cream tonight.”

Scootaloo laughed and smiled at me. “Sounds like a plan.” She glanced at Diamond Tiara, and gave her a half-hearted smile as well. “Can you give me a moment, though? I... kinda owe somepony  an apology, I think.”

“Sure,” I said, gesturing for Melody to follow me out of the schoolhouse.

“Look,” Scootaloo said to Tiara as I pushed the door shut, “I get what–” The door clicked shut and I turned to look at Melody.

“So…” I said, smiling at her. “Us… and Tiara… I guess we should talk about that soon, and try to figure out how this is going to work. Still, I’m sure we can figure something out and it will be completely great and we’ll all be happy and there will just be so much kissing and–” I stopped talking as a pair of lips pressed against mine, and I leaned into the kiss in what was probably the best interruption of the night. Her lips didn’t have the berry taste Tiara’s had, but they were somehow even softer than her lips were, and I didn’t even think that was possible. It was like being hugged by my favorite stuffed animal, just… not as hairy… and wetter.

“Sorry,” she said, suddenly pulling away from me, her green cheeks tinged red. “I just, I wanted to know, and…” She tried to hide under her bangs. “You probably don’t want to date me anymore, I’m really sorry.”

“It’s fine,” I said before returning the kiss. “I liked it too, and I promise we’ll figure it all out when we talk with Tiara. It’s not going to be easy, but I’ll figure out a way for everypony to get what they want.”

“Thanks,” she said, her blush finally fading. “Do you think we can have that talk soon? I’d… It would mean a lot to me if we did.”

“Of course,” I said as the door to the schoolhouse opened, and Diamond Tiara and Scootaloo trotted out, with Scootaloo patting (one of) my marefriend(s) on the back. “Just not tonight. Tonight is about one thing and one thing only.”

“Free candy?” three of my best friends asked, looking at me with varying degrees of excitement.

“Free candy!” I shouted, pointing a hoof towards town. “Now let’s go find the rest of our friends, make sure they’ve dealt with their doubles, and get as much candy as we can carry. If we hurry, we can probably get there before the rest of the trick-or-treaters have dealt with their doubles, meaning we can get first pick. Also… where are Apple Bloom and the rest of our friends?”

“When I left them, they were having some fight at the clubhouse,” Scootaloo said from behind me. “Also, what if the grown-ups are still dealing with their doubles and can’t give us any candy?”

I froze. “That– That– That–” My brain struggled to find a solution. “That– That– That–” Maybe if I just had a… No, not without a… Could I just take it? Would that be stealing? Perhaps I could find Socket and have him do another… “That– That– That–”

“Good job,” Tiara said, poking my side with a forehoof. “You broke her.” She gave a sigh and kissed my cheek. “Sweetie, if you don’t get any free candy tonight, I’ll have Daddy buy you an entire warehouse of candy for you.”

My ears perked up and I swirled around to wrap my forelegs around her neck before pressing my lips as tightly as I could against hers. I couldn’t help but giggle as we kissed. “Thank you so much!” I said when our kiss finally ended. “For a second, I was really scared there. Still, let’s hope it doesn’t come to that, I mean, Nightmare Night candy just tastes better than regular candy. It’s a known fact.”

“Of course,” she said, rolling her eyes. “Everypony knows that.”

“Now come on,” I said as I sprinted towards the clubhouse. “It’s like Pinkie says, ‘time is candy,’ and right now, we’re losing a lot of candy.”