//------------------------------// // Perhaps Ezekiel Was Here // Story: Appledashery // by Just Essay //------------------------------// “So...” Rainbow fidgeted with her turquoise hooves in mid-hover. “...how exactly can wheels possess a unicorn?” “On their own, they probably can't.” Daring shrugged. She smirked as she and the rest of the party followed Trixie down the winding staircase that hugged a mountainous, subterranean pillar. “But with the shard, anything's possible!” She tilted her pith helmet back and smirked. “You of all ponies should know that.” “Huh? Why me?” “You've been getting a lot of those rare stones lately,” Daring said. “No wonder you're selfish about nabbing this one.” “It's not selfish!” Rainbow frowned. “I'm protecting the world from the likes of Romulus, Don Canter, and worse.” “Heh. Sure you are. And just where do you have those shards locked up, huh? Please don't say a nebulous floating cloud home in the sky.” “Uhhhh...” Rainbow Dash winced, rubbing her hooves together with shrunken pupils. “Derrrrr...” Daring face-hoofed. “Ungh! Do you even look at yourself half the time?! You're a walking disaster area!” “Yeah, well, so my style's been off a bit lately! I'm still the fastest pegasus in all of Equestria!” “Pfft. Yeah. The fastest to fly into a brick wall!” “Hey! I've grabbed the shards on my own, yeah! But I've freed slaves from diamond dogs and saved an entire Manehattan family from utter doom! Just what have you done since teaming up with Noir?!” “Kept a level head on my shoulders, that's for sure!” Daring smirked. “At least with this whole Dredgemane business, I've got a plan! Not all of us are dumb enough to think that 'flying by the seat of one's saddle' can work in this crazy, mixed-up world!” “You?” Rainbow glared. “You're going to lecture me on thinking on my hooves?” “It's a matter of who does it better.” Daring chuckled. “I like to see how you would have handled Miss Glowy-Eyes back there at the lift!” “Oh, like it's soooooo hard to slap Trixie's skull back into fart-space and kick her in the rear until she starts marching off to wheel-land.” “Still, you didn't think of it first.” “I didn't have to think about it! I didn't have to—” Rainbow seethed. “Look! Why does everything have to be a friggin' competition to you?! Don't you have—like—a ton of books written or something?!” “Heck yeah!” “Then who in the hay do you have to show off to?!” Rainbow's voice cracked as she gestured wildly with her dangling hooves. “I mean, you've had your cake and eaten it too! On multiple occasions! What could getting the shard here possibly do for you?!” “You wouldn't understand, champ,” Daring Do said with a sigh. “Not unless you've done everything, gone everywhere, and headbutted every face there is to be headbutted in this world.” “Lemme guess. Adventurer's ennui?” Rainbow groaned. “Boohoo. Go cry a river for everypony who's wanted more from life after getting a smattering of thrills.” “You mean you're not in it for the suspense?” Daring blinked. “What kind of an adventurer sidekick are you?!” “Stop calling me a sidekick!” Rainbow barked. “And, if you must know...” She glanced ahead, making sure she was well out of earshot of Pinkie. Floating low, she murmured. “I'm doing this all ultimately for somepony else.” “Somepony... else...?” Daring blinked. “A special somepony.” “Ohhhhhhhhh...” Daring nodded, then she smirked. “I gotcha.” “Good. Then maybe you'll understand—” “I won't tell her a single thing. Don't you worry.” “Uh huh. Wait... what?!” “Though, I don't get what you see in her, personally.” Daring chuckled. “It'd be like making love to cotton candy on a trampoline!” “Snkkt... it's not Pinkie!” “Suuuuuuuure it isn't.” Daring giggled. “I mean it!” “Cuz you just happened to choose her hometown as the place to go hunting for the next shard!” “Darn it—” “And you just happened to accidentally run into her sister!” “Grrrrrrrr! It's not Pinkie!” Pinkie leaned into the conversation. “What's not me?!” Rainbow Dash turned pale as a sheet, her eyes wide. “Uhhhhh... d'uhhhhhhhh...” “Anywho...” Pinkie spun and pointed at an immensely bright chasm looming in front of them. “Lookie what Trixie found!” “Holy snikeys!” Daring wheezed, nearly dropping from her wings. Before the mares stretched an array of immense stone platforms, each carved with the intricate figures of alicorns, their wings spread to support multiple branching archways and bridges connecting a convoluted system of granite platforms. But that wasn't the startling part. What made everypony's jaw drop was the hovering structures in between the bridges. Gigantic granite wheels spun on levitating axes, drifting in counter-clockwise orbit of the multiple stone support beams that kept the entire underground kingdom aloft. These same wheels glowed with otherworldly light, and no matter how swiftly they spun they made no sound louder than the gentle rustle of cold, cold winds. “Wheeeeeeeeels...” Trixie trotted forward, leaning on the edge of the staircase, teetering. “...Wheels?” Her fuzzy muzzle pouted as she teetered over. Swooosh! Rainbow zipped over and caught her before she could plunge into the abyss. “Er... y-yes, Trixie.” She gulped, shivering slightly as she hugged the unicorn. “...wheels.” “So much stone...” Maud droned. “Spinning and glowing rocks.” Her left eyebrow twitched. “Somebody pinch me.” “Oki doki loki!” Pinkie leaned in and bit Maud's left ear. Chomp! “... ... ...” Maud's other ear twitched. “I've never felt so alive,” she murmured.