“Did you really have to do that, dear?” Sombra mumbled through ragged breaths, silently vowing payback as the alicorn smirked back at him. If there was anything he disliked, none of them compared to the solar princess’ playful antics, which included going on life-threatening adventurers to get the adrenaline rush she always craved for. The confidence she had in the unicorn stallion to get them back to safety in one piece was what had tired him out so much, and this ‘adventure’ just had to be on the day when she invited her student, Twilight, to go to Canterlot. In other words, the task of having to do long-distance teleportation as he bore the weight of a cheering alicorn on his back, along with the anxiety of a hydra about to gobble them up in one bite was definitely not leaving him tired out, but exhausted.
He shot a glare at Celestia, noting with an even darker one that, while he was grimy from stepping and galloping around the bog, she had retained the pristine condition of her coat because she had sat atop him throughout the entire journey. He was so tempted to shake his coat about to get the mud on her, but he knew better than to get his room dirty in the process, especially with his cabinet of sombreros being open and prone to getting literally soiled. He’d get her later, and he was a stallion of his word. “Now look at all this mess you caused, Celestia. You should feel guilty for trying to give me a heart attack and getting me so dirty.”
“How about ‘no’?” Despite an annoyed growl that left the once-black Sombra, Celestia still leaned forward to kiss his cheek, although she only did so after lifting off the clump of mud and smearing it into his mane. “Thanks for the adventure, dear. We should do this more often if we both enjoy this so much, right? I know I did.” Sombra, giving up on keeping his room clean after seeing the hoofprints he was leaving behind, grabbed his own clump of mud to throw at Celestia, but she was already out of the projectile’s path, and the mud decided to land right on his display cabinet. And as if that wasn't bad enough, he realized, to his horror, that his cabinet door was open. His eyes widened, and he gasped in shock and petrification, much to the amusement of the solar princess who merely giggled and headed for the room’s exit. “I think you just dirtied your collection, dear. Better get it cleaned up with you before you head to my dining hall for the meeting!”
Sombra didn’t need her telling him that, for he was already cradling the sombrero that got hit by the muddy projectile with tears in his eyes. Not even bothering to give a goodbye to his amused marefriend as she closed the door behind her and locked it, he rushed to the bathroom and took out a washcloth, adding his own magic to the cloth to clean it back into its original state. Even as he put it back into the display cabinet, he couldn’t shake the feeling that sombrero-eating bacteria was still present on it, and with a tear falling from his determined face, he vowed revenge against the alicorn. “Don’t you worry, Silky, my dear Sombrero! I will avenge you!” He turned to the door, and even though he wanted to address the pony that was there just a few minutes ago, the closest he got was to mumble something darkly in Spaneish that roughly translated to, “I’ll get you, she-devil.”
------
“Aw yeah! We’re going back to Canterlot again! I can’t believe that I was that awesome for taking down that guy!” Twilight rolled her eyes as she looked away from Spike, opting to gaze out at the approaching mountain city instead. The dragon, having earned his place on the stained glass windows for the first time in his life, was too excited for the past few days about what he had done, and when a second invitation came for them to return to Canterlot, Spike had instantly assumed that it was a second celebration of his heroism that was just too awesome to be fully celebrated in just one celebration. At times like these, Twilight likened her pet dragon to the rainbow-maned pegasus sitting opposite her, relaxing against one of the seats as she unknowingly fuelled Spike’s ego. If it was not for the masculine character of his voice and his position in the library, she would have thought that Rainbow Dash had taken over Spike’s body. “I was like pow! and boom! and-”
“Yeah, yeah… Simmer down, Spike. We all know what’s happened. We witnessed it with you, Spike. Don't need to repeat it all over again." Twilight almost fell bad when she saw her pet dragon's wide grin falter. Almost. "Besides, I wouldn’t get too puffed up about it, just in case its just some tea to catch up with each other.”
“But-”
“-Ah!”
“Bu-”
“Nope!”
“But Twi-”
“No means no, Spike!”
“Ugh, fine…” The dragon’s demeanour seemed to turn around as he slouched in his seat, gazing at the floor with disinterest that was absent just a few seconds ago. However, his sadness was not going to last long as a butter-colored pegasus meekly flew in between them.
“Aww, don’t look so down, Spike.” Fluttershy cooed, running a hoof down his spine as a sign of comfort. She looked towards Twilight with a gentle but demanding gaze for her to apologize, but the lavender unicorn was not even looking at her, without an apology to the dragon, she decided to give the second best form of help. "I'm sure Twilight isn't mean to yell at you like that..." A second later saw Pinkie Pie appearing from her friend’s mane.
“Yeah! Don’t be so sad, Spike!” The party pony exclaimed so loud that it was impossible for any of the seven ponies (including herself) to not hear. Fluttershy looked shaken at being the closest pony in terms of distance, and Twilight was looking curiously at Pinkie. “Twilight’s probably just jealous that she couldn’t be the hero this time!” That statement was scandalous in Twilight’s eyes, and she was quick to shoot a glare at the pink pony.
“What in the ha- Pinkie, I am NOT jealous!” Twilight retorted just before she caught sight of smirks on two of her other friends’ faces. "Oh my Go-"
“Crazy ponies don’t think they’re crazy, Egghead.” Rainbow Dash snickered, and her stetson-wearing friend laughed along. Twilight stuttered for a response, but none came before Applejack added her own reply.
“Mah honesty sense tells me that somepony’s lyin’ here, Twi. Ah wonder who it is…” Twilight scoffed, still at a loss for any witty replies, partially because she was just so mad at them for accusing her of being jealous, and also because she just could not think of a proper response that would not make her seem jealous.
“Aww Don’t worry too much, little miss jealous.” Rarity had also failed to hide a snicker, but at least she had Twilight’s attention. “They just love pulling at others’ hooves, so don’t need to get too worked up about such trivial matters.”
“Thanks, Rari- wait a second… Did you just call me little miss jealous?!” It did not take long for the carriage to fill with laughter as the lavender unicorn tried to defend her dignity, but she knew that her friends were too busy laughing to care about what she said. With a harrumph that only made them laugh louder, she switched her gaze to look out of the window, refusing to talk to any of the ponies in the train carriage.
Sweetie Belle sat by her sister's giggling form, confused at why friends could remain friends, even after making each other angry. Rarity was too busy laughing away at Twilight’s plight, so she was going to have to ask her later, along with why the princesses had wanted her to come along to some tea party.
------
"And so she said: 'Ugh. My coffee tastes like dirt.' And I said, 'why else, Celly? It's fresh ground!" The room filled with a mix of cackles and laughter as the mix of royalty and 'ex-villains' guffawed, with the exception of Princess Celestia, who couldn't help but blush furiously. Those were dark days for her, indeed. Days when she was not too bright to prevent herself from falling into traps. "And she still continued drinking because she thought it was a witty reply!"
"It was the eve of April Foal's day!" The solar princess protested before taking a sip from her teacup to hide her embarrassment. "He cheated!"
"Correction: it was April Foals! It was 12 am sharp when you took your first dirt drink!" Discord threw his head back, joined with the howls of laughter of Sombra and Luna. Cadence and Shining Armor were sitting by the side, both chuckling softly because the former found that it was not that amusing while the latter did not want to risk having his position revoked. "I was with you two, you know... In spirit."
"Spirit of chaos, of course you were, my dear draconequus!" Sombra slapped Discord hard on the back, and Discord was too busy laughing to even regard the fact that his midsection was now on one of the few empty seats of the dining hall. "Princess, Princess... Why would you even petrify such great company?"
"We second that thought, Tia! Thou hast never given us a say when Discord escaped!" Princess Celestia could only shake her head in frustration and embarrassment, and now she knew why she used to know better than to get on that Ebony unicorn's bad side. Little did she know that she wasn't the only one who was miffed by her company. "And we do appreciate your coltfriend's taste for headgear. Masterpieces indeed!"
"You're seriously making us wear these pieces of junk?!" All heads turned to face the door as it opened to reveal the last of their guests. Like those that were in the room, they had to follow the dress code of this event, and from her earlier protest, Rainbow Dash had made her perspective of sombreros quite clear to everyone (much to Princess Luna’s shock). "You can't be- serious..." Rainbow loved being at the centre of attention, but this situation was different because all eyes were on her for the wrong reason. "Princess Celestia? Princess Luna? Shining Armor? King Sombra?"
Sombra nodded, silently relieved that Celestia's guest hadn't attacked him yet like she had warned, although she had shamed his collection by calling it junk. He watched as the rest of the ponies and one dragon caught up with their rainbow-maned friend, and as if they brought her clarity of mind, the pegasus' eyes widened and she screamed his name once again, this time in shock and fear.
"KING SOMBRA?!"
Maybe Celestia was right... He thought to himself as he saw a purple unicorn charging up her horn with a snarl on her face, while her other companions had shrunk away from him. He was rather amused at the sight of a passed out baby dragon, but what got his attention was the excited squeal that sounded like it was from a fan filly amongst the fear or anger that came from his party.
"Oh please..." He sang, a smirk on his face as he pushed up his jingling wide-brimmed hat to look at the group. “I am hardly a king now that I’ve allowed Cadence to inherit my position with Sir Shining. You may address me as ‘Doctor Sombrero’ instead!” He could see curiosity mix into the lavender unicorn's expression, and smiled in triumph as Sweetie Belle ran towards him and embraced him, adding bewilderment to her already conflicting emotions.. "Well hello there, child. It's nice to see you again."
“Doctor Sombra?!” Rainbow growled back, anger directed towards Sombra after she came to a gut feeling that he was controlling the princesses, Twilight’s brother, and Sweetie Belle. “What do you even have a degree in?!” Sombra did not retaliate even though the group (except for Spike and Fluttershy) stalked closer to him as if they wanted to rip his throat out. Instead, he was sniggering at the sight of five angry ponies wearing headgear that jingled out merry notes, a far cry from their holders’ expressions.
“Alright, everypony. Just keep calm and we can sort things out like the civilised ponies we are. Please don’t do anything rash.” Princess Celestia had expected them to back down begrudgingly with the exception of the bold rainbow-maned pegasus, so imagine her surprise when she found five mares, one stallion and one draconequus giving her a glare. Both Twilight and Sombra spoke together, although they said different things, with Twilight arguing that all those in the room were under a mind control spell, while Sombra and Discord were berating her for not letting them have their fun. “Alright, you three. That’s enough!”
“But Princess-”
“-Ah!”
“Bu-”
“No!”
“But-”
“No means no, Twilight Sparkle!”
Spike was not the only one which felt a sense of deja vu, and the lavender unicorn’s sudden pout as Celestia got to explaining seemed almost akin to Spike’s when they were on the Friendship Express. This time, however, nopony could really say anything to comfort her when there were more pressing matters going on.
“Perfect. Now that we’ve all calmed down- and stop giving that look to him, Rainbow Dash. I’m going to explain everything. So just take a seat and bear with the sombreros; It’s the dress code for this tea party.” Without much protest, the seven of them went to take a seat for their own, with Sweetie Belle opting to stay in Sombra’s embrace, something that ticked Rarity off. “Yes, Sombra never was bad in the first place, maybe even a better ruler than Luna and I because he thought us how to get things done. He just needed some time off before he went back to his ruling, but Shining and Cadence took over his position as ruler.” As she was explaining, she did not catch sight of Spike paling as he was left with the seat next to Sombra, who grinned toothily at him, his eyes gazing at him like a predator would, silently daring him to get close enough within biting distance. A hoof raised itself, and Celestia sighed. “He has a degree in law, as well as design and art, Rainbow Dash. Peculiar, but true.”
“Don’t forget the maracas, dear.” The volume of his musical instruments’ shaking was enough to cause some of them to flinch. “That degree is what I’m most proud of.”
Celestia only rolled her eyes at him as she continued. “Yes, that too, as if it wasn’t weird enough. And Sombra is also-”
“And the two of these lovebirds have also been intimate since Celestia sent her sister away!” Discord was quick to butt in on Princess Celestia’s explanation too as he knew that she was going to beat around the bush with such things. “He was both Celestia’s and Luna’s coltfriend at first though, and that’s why, fillies and gentledragon, we have the batponies!” Discord guffawed, watching the mixed reactions that went through his audience: Sombra, Shining Armor, Cadence and Pinkie were making their amusement known, Celestia and Luna were blushing madly, and the rest of them were slack-jawed, taking an extraordinarily long time to register this new (and possibly scandalous) information.
“We’re much closer than you think, young’uns.” Sombra chuckled, giving Celestia and Luna a kiss on the cheek to make them blush harder.
“Enough, Discord. We will not stand idly by whilst you tarnish our names!” Luna growled, grabbing a conveniently placed guitar and throwing it at the draconequus, who was shedding tears of laughter. He caught the projectile with ease and floated to the corner of the room, catching hold of Sombra as he floated past him and depositing him on the ground where two conveniently placed maracas lay. “Now play us a tune and stop laughing, colts. We wish to dine without embarrassment!”
“Anything for you, lovely.” They chuckled in unison, dodging a cup of tea that was hurled at them by a livid dark blue alicorn with a bow. The pair exchanged a hoofbump and began shaking/strumming out a catchy tune, setting the initially awkward or hostile behavior to one of festive joy as if whatever was transpired earlier was all forgotten. Celestia and Luna tried their best to forget about their little secret being dispensed like that and motioned to the food, urging their fellow guests to start partaking in the exotic fare. They all agreed like every guest would, but they dined in relative silence until Celestia spoke up once again.
“So… What do you all think of Sombra, or Sombrero, in this case.”
All heads turned to see Sweetie Belle with a dreamy look on her face as she sighed.
“He’s so amazing…”