“Interesting story," Twilight said after I finish the edited version of my story, “But what do you want me to do? Given what you said I don't think the mirror in the Crystal Empire will get you home, and you don't know how you got here so we can't reverse engineer the phenomena, so I'm drawing a blank on what to do. Maybe we should tell Celestia about this."
“If she hasn't senced that I had arrived - and because she hasn't sent you a letter, I doubt she has - I think there's a reason for that and my gut says to look for my friends first." and after a pause I add, “And to ask for food."
“Why should we trust your gut?" She demanded, and after a pause added “And how can you think of food at a time like this?"
“I'll answer your questions with multiple answers.(1)Haven't you not really known what to do, but your instinct was what got you to succeed.(2)I'm a guy, my metabolism is high (3)I was hungry before I got here, your lucky I can do anything but eat."
“A-are we done arguing?"Fluttershy asked.
“Yes we are. I'm gonna raid the kitchen while you tell Twilight what you saw when you found me, don't leave anything out, after that we'll check around town for the others," I say.
brrrrrrrrpp
A green flame comes from the kitchen. We look at each other and rush into the kitchen. Fluttershy and Twilight go to Spike and I rummage through cabinets.
“Who's the message from, Spike" Twilight asked.
“Princess Luna," Spike said, “Why is he looking through our cabinets?"
“Food," I said grabbing an onion.
“What does it saysay Twilight?" Fluttershy asked.
“It's not addressed to me."
“Ten bits says I know what it's about," I say as I grab a carrot.
“What?" Spike asked.
“My arrival, duh."
“Who's it to," Fluttershy asked.
“A group of ponies call the Paladins, I don't know who they are but they certainly seem important."
Start to respond when a heavy feeling in my gut arrives and I'm washed with the same tingly feeling that I got back at the cave. I look out the window and I swear that I just saw the Apple Family farm. I lock my jaw, steel my mind, throw up my hood and say: “I know where one of my friends are."
They give me a confused look.
“Just tell Twilight what you saw, I'll be back, okay Flutters?"
She nods.
“Good."
_____________________________
It takes me an hour just to find where the farm is so I imagine Fluttershy was worried sick. As I walk to the main house I think my situation. I could tell nopony - thanks to Twilight on the pony/person confusion - and calling just try to lie through my teeth while at the same time looking for a powerful artifact, tell one or two and Run the risk of them telling, not worried about that for Flutters but the rest I am, or tell everyone and almost certainly be hunted. I personaly like door number two the best. I see middle school aged kids run to the house. Yep someone landed nearby. I start running and calling but only get there attention for a moment before someone opens the door to the house. We reach it at about the same time but they start talking first. Each talking loudly fast and over each other so we only get bits and pieces. It went something like; “... Orchard...wind and a big flash..unconscious...get you!"
I take the opportunity to say “I think one of my friends ended up in your apple orchard, can I check it out"
“Your friend?"
“How did he do that stuff if he's an earth pony?"
“Now hold just an apple pickin' second," the girl at the door shouted, “What in tarnation are ya'll talkin' about? Start from the beginning, okay gals?"
“We were walking in the orcha trying figure out how to get our cutie marks...." The unicorn girl said.
“...when a HUGE gust of wind came and then there was this flash of light..." The pegasus said excitedly.
“...and then there was some guy was on the ground -what was the ya used Sweety Bell? Unconscious right? Thanks,- he was so we ran sto get you." The one with the bow finished.
“And your story, mister," asked the girl.
“Magical portals, the one in the Crystal Empire won't work, the guy in the orchard probably is the friend I'm looking for, Twilight'll fill in the blanks."
“What?"
“I haven't the time to explain it all, either come with me now and then speak to Twilight or talk to her now and let me wander your orchard."
“Fine, Applebloom, where'd ya say ya saw this?"
“Follow us," Applebloom responded.
_____________________________
Along the way I “learn" each of their names, Scootaloo, Applejack, Sweety Bell, and Applebloom. Maybe I a seudo-name for myself. But then again Twilight and Fluttershy already know my real name so there's point, so I tell them my name.
“So where ya from, Tim," she asks, futilly trying to get a read on me “That accent certainly ain't from around here"
“My accent is French-African, not British mind you, and I am a born and raised New Mexican. Of course that's probably meaningless to you," I respond.
She starts to answer when Scootaloo shouts: “Over there!" We run to a figure laying on the ground. It was Shar. That's strange, he should have followed me in a few minutes after me, if the three of them argued, but its been hours. I must investigate this. Dammit, now I'm Sherlock Holmes. I pull the onion out of my pocket and club him with it.
“groan. What was that for?" He asks.
“Your late," I answered.
“What are you talking about, I spent like thirty seconds laughing at Mark and Harley's reaction to your brashness. They tossed me in."
I smile, “Wanna split this onion?"
“Sure."
We break it and as we eat Shar asks; “Does that chick have a unicorn horn?"
“Yep," I said nonchalantly.
“And the one to the right has wings?"
I hit his head with my wing. “Dumbass, the one to the left has wings."
“What just hit me?"
“My wing."
“If ya'll are done chitchatn'," Applejack said with annoyance, “Maybe we should go see Twilight?"
“My thoughts exactly."
“Are we in Equestria?"
“Hold on," I said as I pretend to twist something behind his ear. “Lose screw."
Everypony rolls their eyes except Shar, who rattles off pi to eight places. Things are getting better by the moment.
_____________________________
When we reach the Golden Oaks Library we find Rainbow Dash trying to convince Fluttershy or Twilight to help her with the afternoon whether.
“Dash, we're always willing to help," Twilight glances to us, “and maybe Tim can help?"
“Never flown before, but sure," I said happily. Dash, on the other hand, was undeniably shocked.
“You've never flown before!?!"
“That is correct."
“This is a joke!"
“No, but I might make an attempt to change that if you stop gawking and give me a second." I extend my wings and give a powerful downward flap. I rocket into the air. Another flap. And another, and soon I hover in the air. Two crashes, three near misses, an epic fail at trying to be a humming bird I master the art.
“Well," I said, “Lets make some rain."