Chapter 9: Cutie Troubles
It didn’t take long for the Cutie Mark Crusaders to reach their club house. After all, it was only a short distance from Sweet Apple Acres.
Alex had spent his time trying to piece together what had happened so far. For reasons he couldn’t quite explain or understand, he was now the size of a mouse (or bug pending his current predicament). He had escaped Applejack and her brother, only to get lost in the apple orchard. Nearly became a meal for a hungry spider, got trapped inside a glass jar by three young fillies and was now being taken to their ‘club house’ somewhere in the woods.
Despite the inconvenience, he really couldn’t complain too much. He did feel a lot safer inside the jar. After that near-nasty incident with the spider, he rather welcomed it. He obviously didn’t plan on staying long though and knew that he had to find a way to escape and get big again, without having the other ponies find him.
In the meantime, a series of questions ran through his mind. ‘Why does this always happen to me? What was that light? Why did I wind up here in Equestria? How did that apple pie shrink me? For that matter… how come my clothes shrank with me?’ Alex then sighed. ‘I wonder what my family is doing now. They’re probably worried sick and wondering where I am. I’ll bet they miss me…’
*****
Meanwhile, somewhere on Earth, Alex’s father sat comfortably in his living room chair reading a newspaper while his mother was in the kitchen.
“MURIEL!”
“Yes Dear?”
“WHERE’S MY DINNER?”
*****
Alex smiled. ‘Yeah… They miss me-’
SCREECH!
“OFF!”
He was suddenly knocked out of his track of thoughts as the scooter suddenly skidded to a halt, causing him to get thrown face first into the glass. Painfully peeling his face off the glass, Alex rubbed his face, peered through the thick glass and saw that they had arrived at the club house.
It was a cute little treehouse with a pad and boardwalk, with a flag on a pole on the roof. Parking her scooter, Scootaloo and her friends lifted Alex out of the trolley and carried him inside.
They placed him on the floor and surrounded him. Alex saw how the curious eyes of his captors regarded him with great interest. He also had a good look at the club house’s interior. There was a podium at the end of the room. A map of Ponyville on the wall with several ‘X’ marks crossed over it. There was a rope leading up to the celling and a bull’s-eye(?) on the floor in one corner. Aside from that, everything else seemed like how he would expect from a normal treehouse.
“What a strange bug…” Sweetie Belle was the first to say anything.
“It must be a new kind of bug. One nopony has ever seen befur.” Applebloom second.
“If that’s true…” Scootaloo third. “…Then we are the FIRST to discover one!”
“Definitely worth a cutie mark!” cheered Applebloom.
“YAY!” Sweetie Belle chirped as she reared in excitement.
Alex wasn’t too thrilled to being called a ‘bug’, but he didn’t have much of a choice. He decided to remain quiet until he had figured out what he was up against and how he could escape.
The three fillies then suddenly lined up and pressed their flanks against each other, regarding them with gleeful anticipation. Alex watched them with a cocked eyebrow, wondering what they were doing. His eyes then narrowed as he realized something was wrong with this picture. They didn’t have marks on their flanks! What was that about? He then noticed their faces suddenly turn to disappointment.
“Aw… Nothing?” Sweetie Belle groaned.
“Still no cutie mark? Darn it! What are we doin’ wrong?” Applebloom wondered.
Alex was puzzled for a moment and scratched his head before he slowly began to piece together what the so-called ‘cutie marks’ they were talking about were.
The marks!
These ‘cutie marks’ were probably some form of next stage in their lives, like puberty. From what he had gathered, every pony he had encountered so far had a mark that seemed to signify their occupation or personality. Maybe even both?
It struck him now that these fillies, these ‘Cutie Mark Crusaders’, were trying to find their special talent. Obviously ‘bug collecting’ wasn’t one of them. Not to mention ironic since he wasn’t a bug at all.
His eyes darted back to the map as the ‘X’ marks seemed to make more sense now...
“So what do we do now?” asked a deflated Scootaloo. All three of them sat down on their haunches and began to think. Alex just quietly watched them.
Then Sweetie Belle had an idea. “I know! We should name it!”
“Name it?” asked Scootaloo.
“Yeah, name it.” she chirped. “Perhaps if we think of name for it, maybe then we get our cutie marks?”
“That’s a great idea!” said Applebloom.
“CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS: BUG NAMERS! YAY!”
Alex covered his ears in agony. Did they really have to cheer so loud?
The three fillies sat around Alex, trying to come up with a name for him. Applebloom rested her head on her hooves, eyeing the ceiling in deep thought.
Sweetie Belle sat upright and rested her right elbow on top of her left foreleg, while tapping her head with her right hoof, sticking out her tongue as she strained her thoughts to think of a name.
Scootaloo played with her hooves, with a rather bored expression on her face.
Inside the jar, Alex continued to regard the fillies with silent amusement.
Suddenly, Sweetie Belle sprung up for her pose in excitement. “I GOT IT! We’ll call it Alan!” she beamed.
“Alan???” Applebloom glanced questionably at her. Alex silently did the same.
“Alan is a good name…”
“For a bug?” Scootaloo interjected. “That’s a terrible name! It’s gotta be something cool and awesome! I wanna call it Rainbow Dash Jr. You know, after Rainbow Dash.”
“We know…” They both said bluntly in unison. Even Alex thought that was dumb.
“We ain’t callin’ it Rainbow Dash Jr.”
Scootaloo sighed. “Okay, fine. Then what do you wanna call it?” she asked Applebloom.
Applebloom thought for a moment. “Hm… How about… ‘Little-Weird-Apple Acre-Bug creature’? Squee!”
The two fillies (and Alex) stared deadpanned at her before frowning. “That’s not name, that’s a description!” said Sweetie Belle.
Scootaloo groaned. “Ugh! This isn’t getting us anywhere…”
“Maybe we’re goin’ about tis’ the wrong way.” Applebloom wondered.
“I say we’re not trying hard enough!” Scootaloo added, hammering her hoof on the floor and causing Alex to momentarily lose his footing.
‘Easy girls…’
“Maybe we should ask Fluttershy?” Applebloom suggested. “She knows a lot about bugs and animals. Maybe she can help us pick a name for it?”
‘She sure would.’ Alex grumbled sarcastically as he got back up, getting slightly worried now. If they told Fluttershy about him, then it wouldn’t be long before he found himself inside his new little habitat. Of course now she’d probably resort to a bird cage instead. Due to his current stature, she would definitively take the whole ‘mothering’ role further and he imagined himself being pampered and fed with a tiny baby bottle. Not to mention some her animals might even see him as a snack. And then there was Angel. He shuddered at the idea. He had to stop them somehow.
He then had a thought. Due to the fact that he was now too small to even be considered human anymore, he decided to try something else. And seeing as how he was dealing with children, they were probably innocent enough to believe just about anything. He was no Child Psychologist, but he had been around kids before and knew how gullible they could be at times.
Since he clearly didn’t resemble anything they had ever seen before, that gave him an idea...
“Maybe we should go n’ see Fluttershy?” Applebloom continued.
“I don’t know…” Scootaloo said rather unsure. “I just don’t think we’ll get our cutie marks if we ask for help…”
Sweetie Belle, having been quietly thinking for a bit, suddenly chirped. “Let’s try naming it again! I got a good one this time. How about Tom?” she smiled. The others just frowned at her.
“Tom? Pfft! I wouldn’t even give that name to a rock. While we’re at it, why don’t we just call him Dick?” Scootaloo teased, clearly not taking the name issue serious anymore.
“Or Harry?” added Applebloom.
They all started giggling.
“How about Alex?”
“Alex?” Scootaloo stopped her giggling and stuck out her tongue in fake disgust. “Bleh! That’s even worse! We’re definitely not calling it Alex, Sweetie Belle.” she laughed.
Sweetie Belle looked bewildered. “I-I didn’t say Alex.”
“Sure you did!” Scootaloo snickered.
“No… I didn’t…”
Scootaloo’s laughing seized and they suddenly eyed Applebloom.
“Don’t ya’ll look at me! Ah didn’t say’ anythin’.”
“Well if you two didn’t say it... And I didn’t say it… Then who said it?”
“Ahem!” The fillies turned their eyes towards the source of the sound and found themselves staring at their ‘bug’. They watched, with mouths agape as Alex stood upright, cleared his throat and waved at them. “Hello.”
The three fillies gasped as they leaned over Alex with disbelief in their eyes. Their little bug talked!
“Did… Did it just… talk?” Scootaloo stuttered surprised.
“Nah’… It… It couldn’ have!” Applebloom replied in same manner.
“But… Bugs don’t talk…” Sweetie Belle sounded worried.
“I do and I did. And I would prefer if you didn’t call me ‘it’ or a ‘bug’.” Alex said, regarding them confidently as he stood straight with his arms crossed.
The fillies looked nervously at one another. Eventually they became more curious and bravely introduced themselves.
“Uh… Hi.” Applebloom waved at him. “Mah’ name’s Applebloom…”
“Sweetie Belle.”
“And I’m Scootaloo.” The little pegasus tried to act cool. Suddenly all three huddled together. “And we’re- ”
“THE CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS!”
'Ouch!' Alex shielded his ears. As the ringing finally subsided, he straightened himself and coughed. “Okay… Let’s see.” He pointed at one filly at the time while recalling their names. “Applebloom… Sweetie Belle… and Scootaloo…” the little pegasus’ wings buzzed excitedly while she nodded. Alex kept looking curiously at her. “Really? You’re named after a chicken?”
Scootaloo was taken aback by that. Applebloom giggled, while Sweetie Belle tried to muffle her laughter (failing miserably).
“HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!”
Scootaloo fumed. “Hey! I’m not a chicken!” she growled at them. Applebloom and Sweetie Belle quickly stopped giggling and tried to act innocent. Scowling at Alex, Scootaloo moved closer to the jar. “More importantly, what are you? And how is it that you can talk?”
Having finished chuckling, Alex got serious. He decided to enact his plan and became the one thing his clever mind could think of.
“Me?” He danced around a bit while smiling. “Why I’m a Leprechaun.”
Maybe not the cleverest idea ever, but it had to do… It was either that or genie, and genie material he was not.
“LEPRECHAUN?!?” The fillies exclaimed in unison as they looked at one another in surprise.
“That’s right! I’m a Leprechaun from the Everfree Forest. I was just visiting your lovely orchard when you trapped me inside this jar.” They all dropped her ears and blushed.
“Sorry…” Scootaloo said sheepishly.
“It’s alright.” He waved it off. “You meant no harm by it. And you did save me from a nasty spider.”
“Aw! No biggie!” smiled Scootaloo.
“Ah’ never heard of a ‘Leprycan’ befur.” said Applebloom, clearly unable to pronounce it. “What’s that?”
“It’s Leprechaun." he corrected her. "We are magical creatures and I couldn’t help overhearing your little cutie mark problem.” The surprised fillies eyed their flanks and realized he had heard everything they talked about. “I believe I can help you with that.”
“YOU CAN?!” they all exclaimed in unison, with stars twinkling in their eyes.
“Seeing as how you fairly caught me, it’s the Leprechaun Code to grant the wishes of his captors in exchange for his freedom.” He took a bow.
The fillies excitedly looked at eachother. “Did you hear that?!” Sweetie Belle beamed.
“Awesome!” cheered Scootaloo.
Applebloom suddenly became unsure. “Wait, let me see Ah got tis’ straight… Yer sayin’ ya’ll goin’ to help us get our cutie marks. How?”
“Why, with a little ‘Leprechaun magic’, that’s how!” Alex smirked, playfully wiggling his fingers about. He crossed his arms while glowing with self-confidence. ‘Giggle! This is going to be easy!’
BOP!
Alex suddenly found his view obstructed by a large crack on the glass.
“Well? What are you waitin’ fer?” asked an excited Applebloom as she presented her rear right in front of him. “Give me mah cutie mark!”
“Uh…”
BOP! BOP!
“Yeah!” added Scootaloo as both she and Sweetie Belle did the same and surrounded him. “Use your ‘Lepercan’ magic on us and give us cutie marks.”
“It’s Leprechaun…” Alex corrected nervously. Somehow this backfired on him. “I uh… Cough! Listen girls, this isn’t…”
“What’s wrong? Ah thought ya said y’d help us get cutie marks?”
“Yes but-”
“Well then what are you waiting for? Do it already!” demanded Scootaloo.
“Please? We’re desperate!” pleaded Sweetie Belle.
“Do me first!” said Applebloom.
“No way! I want to go first!” argued Scootaloo.
“No! ME!” shouted Sweetie Belle.
As they argued, they unwittingly began pressing and rubbing their rears against the glass, cutting off all light. Alex knew he had to break this up before they smothered him.
“GIRLS! GIRLS!!!” His sudden yelling made the girls stop. By now they had backed themselves in so much they had basically lifted him up from the floor. “THAT’S NOT HOW IT WORKS!!!”
They quickly removed themselves from him, causing the jar to drop down on the floor. The jar wobbled a bit before finally resting in its upright position. The girls approached the jar with concern.
“Omgosh! We’re so sorry! Are ya okay?” asked Applebloom concerned.
Rubbing his head and muttering something not meant for the ears of children, Alex got back up on his feet while the fillies stared at him.
“Mr. Leprechaun?” asked Sweetie Belle.
“It’s Lep-!” He blinked and shook his head. “Nevermind…” He breathed a sigh of relief. “I’m okay. And just call me Alex, please.”
“Oh good!” exclaimed Scootaloo with relief as she suddenly pressed her muzzle in front of him, making him jump. “So? How do we get the cutie marks?”
Alex then rubbed his chin and acted hesitant. "I don't know... You girls don’t seem to be quite ready yet. Perhaps I shouldn't..."
“Pretty please?” Sweetie Belle begged.
“We’ll do anything!” said Applebloom.
“ANYTHING!” exclaimed Scootaloo, buzzing her wings.
Alex smirked as the plan seemed to work. “Did you say ‘anything’?”
“Sure did!” Scootaloo smiled. “Just name it.”
*****
“A little more wind please.”
Scootaloo sighed looking rather annoyed as she used her wings to cool Alex off as he lay back comfortably on a large pillow. “This is not exactly how I pictured it…”
“Here’s the applejuice Mr. Leppeychaun!” said Applebloom as she trotted up to him with a glass of applejuice on a tray, equipped with a curly straw. She lowered it down beside Alex and held it as he took a few sips, enjoying the sweet taste.
“Thank you Applebloom. And it’s Leprechaun.”
“Here! Let me fluff your pillow again!” asked Sweetie Belle. Alex was magically lifted up as Sweetie used her magic to fluff and soften the pillow before setting him down again. “Comfy?”
“Thank you Sweetie Belle.” he smiled. Sweetie Belle happily smiled back.
“Shall I sing you a song?” Sweetie Belle suddenly asked Alex. Before he could answer, Sweetie Belle had already started singing.
~~~~~
“There was a colt who had a dog, and Bingo was his name-o~!
B- I- NGO~! B- I- NGO~!
B- I- NGO~!
AND BINGO WAS HIS NAME-O~!”
~~~~~
Apperantly she was putting TOO much effort in it. Alex covered his ears and grimaced at the sound of her high-pitched singing. Even Applebloom and Scootaloo grimaced at the horrible singing. Scootaloo started flapping her wings so much it nearly blew Alex off the pillow. The glass with applejuice on Applebloom’s tray suddenly shattered, soaking Alex from head to toe.
~~~~~
“There was a…~!
~~~~~
“SWEETIE BELLE!” shouted Alex, silencing her. “That’s… That’s enough Sweetie Belle. Thank you. That was… pleasant.”
“Really?” she chirped. “Want to hear another one?” She inhaled the air and was about to sing another song.
“NO!!!”
Sweetie Belle exhaled in confusion as Alex, Applebloom and Scootaloo yelled in unison.
“I mean… I’ll hear your lovely singing later, okay?” said Alex. Sweetie Belle smiled and went to do something else for him. ‘Sweet girl…’ Alex chuckled silently to himself as he leaned back on the comfy pillow. ‘Needs singing lessons though…’
“Uh… Ah don’t mean to bother ya or anythin’ Mr. ‘Lep-eri-caan’…” said Applebloom, still struggeling to pronounce his name. “…but isn’t it bout’ time ya gave us our cutie marks yet? It's been a while now...”
“Hm?” Alex muttered before realizing she asked him a question. “I’m sorry, what..?”
“Yeah… We are going to get our cutie marks, aren’t we?” asked Scootaloo. “I mean, it is the reason we’re doing this, right?” They now all looked at him, eagerly waiting for an answer. Alex only now realized he had goofed it up.
“Oh! Um… Your cutie marks! Ahehe!” he laughed nervously while pulling on the neck of his sweater. His original plan was to get out of the jar and leave with the fake promise of cutie marks in return. But since the fillies were so desperate for cutie marks, he couldn’t pass up a chance to be waited on hand and foot. Not to mention the club house seemed like the perfect place to hide out while he tried to figure out on how to fix his problem.
The only options he had so far was unicorn magic, and he really had no intention of letting Twilight help him just so she could capture him again. He did consider Sweetie Belle, but quickly found out her talent for magic was almost as bad as her solo singing.
As much as Alex enjoyed this little happy hour, he knew it only be a matter of time before their patience with him ran out.
“Of course, your cutie marks! I haven’t forgotten.” He laughed nervously as he started to sweat. “I haven’t forgotten! Cough! You see girls… The thing is-”
“Y’ ain’t givin’ us cutie marks, are ya?” Applebloom bluntly asked with a frown, clearly beginning to show signs of distrust. Scootaloo seized her role as an air-conditioner and Sweetie Belle dropped her feather duster, narrowing their eyes at him.
“Um…” Alex gulped. “Of course I am! I’m… I’m giving you… ‘Leprechaun Servant’ cutie marks!”
“LEPRECHAUN SERVANTS?!?” the fillies exclaimed in unison.
‘Please tell me I did not just say that…’ He gulped again. He was really up the creek now. He watched as all three fillies ganged up on him, regarding him with a serious look in their eyes. ‘That’s it! I’m done for!’
“So… Do we get one?” asked Applebloom.
Alex’s jaw fell. “What..?”
“Do we get our ‘Peprechaun Servant’ cutie marks?” asked Scootaloo. “Did I get it? I did cool you off.”
“What ‘bout me? Ah served ya’ drinks.” said Applebloom.
“What about me? I sang for you!” exclaimed Sweetie Belle. “Listen! B-I- Hmpf!?” She was quickly silenced by Applebloom and Scootaloo before she could finish.
Alex was speechless. He expected them to get mad. But now it just got worse! Not to mention how mad they really would be once they found out he wasn’t a magical Leprechaun. In the end, there was only one thing to do.
“As a matter of fact girls, you have! CONGRATULATIONS!” he smiled.
The fillies gasped and happily turned around to see their new cutie marks. Their happy expressions quickly dashed once they discovered they were still blank flanks.
“Um… Mr. Lepardkahn..? We don’t see any-” the fillies eyes widened and they gasped as Alex was suddenly gone. “Hey, where did he go?” shouted Scootaloo. They cantered up to the pillow but, aside from his imprint on it, there was no trace of him.
“What about our cutie marks?” wailed Sweetie Belle.
“That no good cheater! He’s trying to weasel us out of our cutie marks” exclaimed Scootaloo angrily. “Look everywhere! He has to be around here somewhere!”
The Crusaders searched all over their club house for him. “Found ‘im?” asked Applebloom.
“No!” said Sweetie Belle from up the attic.
“He’s not out here!” said Scootaloo as she opened the door to look outside.
Applebloom stood thinking for a moment before she noticed the pillow seemed to be moving towards the door.
“Hm…”
Crouching down, Applebloom sneaked up on the pillow and carefully lifted it up, revealing Alex as he had so cleverly hidden under the pillow and used it as a means to escape. Only until he felt the load he was carrying was lighter than it was just seconds ago, he tilted his head up and turned around.
“Goin’ somewhere?” Applebloom asked as she eyed him very closely with a sly grin.
“Uh… Yeah!”
POKE!
Alex suddenly poked Applebloom in the eye. “GAH!” With Applebloom momentarily blinded in one eye, Alex made his way towards the open door.
“Sweetie Belle! The jar!” Applebloom called out.
“I got it! Woah!” Running while holding the jar with her forelegs, Sweetie Belle was nearly on top of him when she tripped over her hind legs and dropped the jar, causing it to roll towards Alex. The sudden impact of Sweetie Belle hitting the floor caused Alex to suddenly jolt up from the floor and onto the jar, log rolling it towards the door.
“Scootaloo! Behind ya!”
“Huh?” Scootaloo turned her head and glanced down just in time as Alex passed her and out the door. “Hey!”
Alex grinned and stuck his tongue out at her as he was just moments away from freedom.
“NO YOU DON’T!” yelled Scootaloo and slammed her hooves down on the boardwalk. It loosened and suddenly lifted up like a drawbridge, stopping Alex just as he reached the end. He started rolling back towards the waiting hooves of Scootaloo. “Got you!” she grinned. He was moving too fast however and slipped between her legs, causing her flip over on her back as she tried to grab him.
“Whew!” Alex dried his forehead before he suddenly found Applebloom and Sweetie Belle right in front of him, ready to grab him. He made a sharp turn and evaded them. They quickly gave chase and soon Alex was being chased all over the room with the two fillies close behind.
“Come back here ya ‘Leppycaan’!” yelled Applebloom.
“It’s Leprechaun!” corrected Sweetie Belle.
Knowing that his way out the door now was impossible, Alex saw the window and decided to make a go for it. Rolling close to the wall, Alex made a sharp turn just as the fillies were close enough, causing them to crash into the wall.
CRASH!
“Ouch…” Applebloom dizzily rubbed her head while Sweetie Belle tried to pull her horn out of the wall.
With his pursuers momentarily out, Alex rolled across the floor towards the window. The jar was suddenly stopped by a tipped-over stool and Alex was sent flying towards the window, grabbing the curtain.
“Oh no you don’t!” yelled Scootaloo as she finished closing the door. She quickly galloped over and grabbed the curtain with her teeth. With all her strength, she pulled the curtain down along with Alex.
CRASH!
As the dust settled, Scootaloo pulled herself up from the floor, with the curtain drapped over her. “Where did he go?” She looked around beside her, behind her and between her legs before she noticed movement underneath the curtain on her back. She pulled it off and found him.
Without thinking, Alex suddenly grabbed her mane and, without really understanding why, he kicked his heels on her sides. Surprised, Scootaloo’s wings suddenly flared up, she reared and made a whining sound as she began galloping around the room.
“What the-? HEY! Get off!”
“Scootaloo?” asked Applebloom.
“Don’t just stand there! Get him off!”
The two fillies started chasing Scootaloo. “Scootaloo! Stop!”
“I… I can’t!”
Alex was puzzled by this as well. Somehow he had triggered a natural reflex in Scootaloo, making her run against her will. By pulling her mane, he also found himself being able to guide her wherever he wanted.
“OUCH! Hey! Stop that!”
This proved useful as her friends tried their best to stop her. Sweetie Belle tried to simply block her, only to be easily bypassed. She then teamed up with Applebloom, but even then they were easily evaded. They tried tipping over a table and use it a blockade, but they graced over it with easy.
Alex then realized something and grinned. Making a sharp turn, he made Scootaloo gallop towards the window. Picking up the pace, Alex pulled back and made her jump out the window.
“Fly! Fly to freedom! Ahaha-ha!” Alex laughed like a maniac as he felt the wind in his hair.
“I can’t fly!”
“Ahahaha- Say what!?”
CRASH!
“SCOOTALOO!” yelled the two fillies.
“Oooh…” As the dust settled, Scootaloo and Alex were lying on the ground with their eyes rolling. They had stopped short in mid-air and plummeted straight to the ground hard. Alex sat up and painfully rubbed his head while shaking off the three imaginary fillies that galloped around his head. Scootaloo lay on the ground behind him with her chin planted in the dirt and her rear in the air. She was seeing stars that resembled Alex.
Alex dusted himself off, only to quickly find that Scootaloo had recovered as well and was glaring at him while still in her crashed position. “Ahehe… sorry?” He was about to make a break for it, only to get caught as Scootaloo grabbed him by the jacket with her teeth and lifted him off the ground.
As the others lowered the boardwalk, Scootaloo trotted quickly back inside with Alex struggling to free himself.
*****
“OOF!”
Alex was dropped rather roughly back inside the jar as they sealed it tight. Alex felt he had that coming, but now it seemed to look pretty dark for him as they again surrounded him with a now hateful look in their eyes.
“Give us our cutie marks!” demanded Scootaloo.
“You promised!” said an even angrier Sweetie Belle. “You said it was the Leprechaun Code!”
“I can’t!” said Alex.
“Do it or else I’ll tell Rainbow Dash!” threatened Scootaloo.
“NO! PLEASE DON’T!!” Alex wailed. “I’ll confess! Look! I can’t give you cutie marks because…” He gulped. He nervously pushed his fingers together and smiled sheepishly. “…because I have no magic…”
The fillies gasped. “You lied?!?” exclaimed Sweetie Belle. She picked up the jar and started shaking it. “You naughty little Leprechaun! If my sister Rarity was here, she’d teach you a thing or two!”
“Relax Sweetie Belle.” said Applebloom, taking Alex off her hooves and placing him back on the floor while Sweetie Belle huffed with anger. A dizzy Alex wobbled around as he tried to stop the room from spinning. As much as she thought he deserved that, she couldn’t help but feel a bit sorry for him at this moment.
“Well this is just great!” Scootaloo huffed. “If we can’t use Leprechaun magic, then what can we do now?” They all slumped down on their haunches, completely out of ideas.
They sat and pondered for a while until Scootaloo’s ears perked. “Wait! I got it!” She sprung up on her hooves and grinned as she eyed Alex deviously. “I know how he can get our cutie marks! We can be Leprechaun Experts!”
“Leprechaun Experts?” Applebloom and Sweetie Belle said as they sprung up. Alex curiously cocked his eyebrow.
“That’s a great idea!” said Applebloom with a smirk as she too eyed Alex. Alex gulped as he started to have a bad feeling about this. “If nopony in Ponyville have ever seen a Leprechaun befur…”
“…Then maybe nopony in Equestria has too!” Sweetie Belle interjected, giving Alex an equally menacing glare while grinning.
“We can bring ‘im to school for ‘Show n’ Tell’!” added Applebloom. “Show him off to the whole class!”
“That’s an even better idea!” said Sweetie Belle. “Although…” She looked at Alex. “….I think he needs to be more presentable.” she said with a wryly grin. “I’ll ask Rarity to borrow some of her fabrics and sewing equipment and make a nice little suit for him, with a cute little hat. I’m thinking green is the color.”
‘Well, they certainly got that part correct…’ Alex sighed. He could just see himself wearing some stupid Leprechaun outfit as hordes of little ponies were laughing and pointing at him.
Suddenly, the jar moved as Scootaloo pulled it towards her, causing Alex to tumble a bit. “Then it’s settled!” Scootaloo banged her hoof on the floor. They huddled together, held Alex high up and shouted in unison.
“CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS: LEPRECHAUN EXPERTS! YAY!”
The suffering Alex felt was unbearable. If they kept this up, it wouldn’t be long before he had gone completely deaf. There was however a much more pressing concern. He was about to become a school’s science project; A hamster to be led inside a maze, a mouse forced to find the cheese, a frog to be…
Alex shook that last horrible idea out of his head. There was no way these cute fillies would even stoop to that. Still, the biggest concern was them revealing him to the other ponies. Once word got out, it wouldn’t be long before the six ‘nightmares’ showed up to pry him away from the fillies.
He had to stop them somehow.
“Please! I beg of you!” pleaded Alex. Hearing his pleas, the three fillies placed him back on the floor and listened. “Look… I know I can’t get you your cutie marks. But if you let me go, I’ll… I’ll…” Alex was sweating. “I’ll give you all my big pot of gold Bits!”
“A BIG POT OF GOLD BITS!?!” the filles exclaimed surprised.
Alex began to sweat. ‘Smooth Alex… Real smooth…’
“Okay!” Applebloom suddenly said and reached for the lid.
“Hey!" Scootaloo swatted Applebloom’s hoof away. “What are you doing?”
“What? Them’ gold Bits sound like a sweet deal. Plus Ah think he’s real sorry now.”
“Oh please! He’s just trying to trick us again.” said Scootaloo as she lightly kicked the jar. “Besides, a cutie mark is worth more than all the Bits in the world.” Alex slumped down in defeat. He knew there was no way he could bargain his way out of this one.
“Yer probably right…” said Applebloom.
“Then it’s settled!” Scootaloo smiled . “We’re going need books and quills.” she said. “We’ll go and ask Twilight for some.”
“And fabrics!” added Sweetie Belle. “We’ll stop by Rarity on the way!”
“To the scooter!” shouted Scootaloo as they raced to the door. They stopped just as they noticed they were one short. “Coming Applebloom?”
Applebloom took a quick glance at Alex. “Um… Ah’ think Ah’ should stay here. You know jus’ to keep an’ eye on ‘im so he doesn’t get away.”
The others looked at one another and nodded in agreement. “Good idea! We’ll be back as soon!” Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle were quickly out the door.
Now alone, Applebloom trotted over to Alex who was still in his defeated pose and picked up the jar. She held him close at eye-level.
“Was it true about what ya’ll said?” She earned his surprised attention. “About tha’ big pot of gold Bits?”
*****
The buzzing of Scootaloo’s wings echoed through the forest as she sped away in her scooter, with Sweetie Belle sitting in the trolley.
“This is gonna be great!” said Scootaloo. “We’ll definitely earn our cutie marks now.”
“Yeah!” said Sweetie Belle. “And I can’t wait to start working on that suit. I’m sure Rarity won’t mind us borrowing some of her fabric...”
SCREECH!
Scootaloo suddenly grinded her scooter to a screeching halts, causing Sweetie Belle to tumble forward in the trolley. “Ow! Hey!? What wrong Scootaloo?”
“What do you suppose they’re doing?”
Sweetie Belle looked in the direction of where Scootaloo pointed and was as perplexed as her.
They had stopped just outside of Sweet Apple Acres. In the apple orchard, four ponies were trotting carefully about and searching through the grass.
“Try here Twilight!” Twilight aimed her horn to where Spike was pointing and lifted various bugs and wildlife up from the ground with her magic while Spike inspected them one by one. “Nope… Nope… Nope…”
“Find anythin’ Winona?” Applejack asked as her dog sniffed through the grass. She looked up at her master and whined sadly as she had been unsuccessful in her task. Applejack patted her on the head. “Don’t worry hon’, jus’ keep lookin’.”
Oh! Careful bunnies…” Fluttershy whispered as she hovered above ground. Several bunnies beneath her searched through the grass. “Anything Angel?” Angel popped his head up, shook it and shrugged. “Oh, it’s okay Angel… Just keep searching. Um… Please?”
“Hm?” Pinkie Pie popped her head out the grass, sporting rather outlandish device on her head with a series of magnifying glasses, strange specs and enhanced hearing apparatuses crafted on it. On her back were various butterfly nets. She suddenly heard something in the grass in front of her and used her specs to zoom in on the grass. There was movement.
“Hmmm?!” She grinned as she slowly pulled off her helmet. She snuck up on her target and, like a cat, curled up and pounced on it. Having it firmly in her hooves, she brought it close to her face with a big smile. “Aha! Gotcha!”
WHAM!
A spider suddenly jumped out of her hooves and directly in her face, causing her fall over and roll around on the grass shrieking as she tried to fight it off.
“GETITOFFGETITOFFGETITOFF!!!”
Watching the whole thing, the two fillies looked at eachother and decided to check it out. They parked the scooter and trotted over to the nearest pony, Twilight. She looked exhausted.
“Hey Twilight? What are you-?”
“STOP RIGHT THERE!” Twilight suddenly yelled. The two fillies instantly froze, only to be covered by Twilight’s magic as she lifted them up in the air and checked beneath their hooves. Letting out a relived sigh, Twilight gently put them back down. “Thank Celestia… Sorry about that girls, but you could’ve stepped on-” She sealed her lips.
“Stepped on what?” asked Sweetie Belle, looking at Scootaloo who shared her confusion.
Twilight bit her lip as she realized she was talking ahead of herself. The last thing she needed was to involve the Crusaders. “Uh… Nopo- I- I mean, I’ve lost something very important in the orchard, and I really need to find it.”
The two fillies looked rather confused at Twilight . “What about them?” asked Scootaloo, pointing at her friends.
“They’ve… lost something really important too.” Twilight smiled sheepishly, just as Pinkie ran screaming passed behind her, still fighting off the spider.
“I see…” nodded Scootaloo, curious as to how all four of them happened to lose something in the orchard on the same day.
“Can we help?” asked Sweetie Belle.
“Nonono! We’re fine! We got everything under control…” She smiled nervously as she noticed Spike signaling her to check another part of the grass. “…nothing to be concerned about.” She used her magic and immediately went to work. “It’s nice of you to ask though…”
“You sure?” asked Sweetie Belle again. “We could be of help-”
“We can’t, Sweetie Belle.” interrupted Scootaloo. “We gotta get to Ponyville, remember?”
“Oh yeah!” Sweetie Belle realized. “We got to go Twilight. By the way, could we borrow some quills and books from the library? We’ve got a project going on.”
“Project? What kind of project?”
“We’re going to be 'Lepridaan' Experts.” said Scootaloo.
"'Leprechaun' Experts." Sweetie Belle corrected her.
“That’s nice, girls.” Twilight said rather offhandedly. “Just make sure you return everything afterwards.”
“We will.” they said as they trotted back to the scooter.
Twilight continued her search. ‘Looks like the Cutie Mark Crusaders are at it again.’ She giggled. ‘Leprechaun Experts… Those fillies sure can come up with the most silly-’ Her head suddenly shot up and her eyes widened. Her magic seized abruptly, causing all the bugs she was levitating to drop all over Spike. “Leprechaun!?!”
A VERY interested and curious Twilight suddenly appeared right in front of the two fillies, startling them. “Excuse me girls! Just what do you mean by ‘Leprechaun’?”
The confused fillies looked at eachother. There was a tense moment before Sweetie Belle finally said something. “We’ve got this really obnoxious (but rather cute) Leprechaun in our club house.”
“I caught him here in the orchard.” said Scootaloo.
Twilight’s eyes grew wider as it seemed her suspicions were confirmed. “You caught him..? A Leprechaun..? Here..? In the orchard..?”
“Yeah..?” The look on Twilight’s face made Scootaloo feel uneasy.
Twilight suddenly looked passed them towards the orchard. Her friends were still searching, unaware of their conversation.
“What’s going on Twi- ?” Spike asked annoyed, having brushed off the last bugs and only to be silenced by a zipper that magically appeared over his mouth. Twilight then used her magic again and teleported them all behind the nearest apple tree.
“Girls, this Leprechaun… Does it have two arms, two legs, wears clothes, hair on its head and goes by the name Alex?”
“Yup! That’s him.” replied Scootaloo. The girls then looked surprised. “Wait, you’ve seen him too?”
“Aaaaw…” lamented Sweetie Belle. They had really hoped nopony knew about him.
Twilight held her mouth in suppressed joy. The Cutie Mark Crusaders had found Alex! Breathing heavily with excitement, she thought for a moment as she removed the zipper from Spike’s mouth.
“OUCH! Twilight? What gives-!?” She shushed him. She then pulled him in a private conversation away from the fillies. Spike was beginning to get slightly annoyed with all this secrecy.
“Spike!” she whispered. “They have Alex!”
Spike’s eyes grew wide. “Really?” he whispered. “That’s great!”
“But I need to get to him without the others getting suspicious.”
“So what do we do?”
Twilight only had a moment to think. “I have an idea.”
*****
Moments later, as all ponies continued their search, Spike suddenly came running, concealing something in his claws.
“TWILIGHT! I CAUGHT HIM! I CAUGHT HIM!”
“Quick Spike, give him here!” yelled Twilight.
“Oh no you don’t!” yelled Applejack and blocked Spike’s path to Twilight. “Give ‘im to me, Spike!”
“Applejack! Spike caught him! He’s mine!”
“Like ya said Twi; the pony that finds Alex gets to keep ‘im! Spike found ‘im and he ain’t a pony!”
“Your… right. I suppose..?” Twilight replied, confused by that logic.
“Alright Spike, hand ‘im over!” Suddenly, she was bumped aside by Pinkie Pie. “Off!”
“Na ah, he’s mine! Pttt~!” Pinkie stuck her tongue out at Applejack before turning her attention to Spike. “Give him to me Spike! Pretty pleeeaaase! I’ll make you jewel incrusted caaaaake~!” said Pinkie, sporting the widest grin ever.
“With emerald frosting?” asked Spike hopefully.
“Ye- Off!” Before Pinkie could answer, she was suddenly tackled to ground by Applejack, leaving the path open for Fluttershy.
“Please Spike. Give him to me. I’ll be ever so gentle…” Fluttershy held out her hooves, as her sweet voice and large pleading eyes almost made him go limp.
“SPIKE! RUN!” yelled Twilight. Snapping out his trance, Spike bolted away as fast as he could. His departure caught the attention of Applejack and Pinkie Pie.
“SPIKE!? GET BACK HERE, CONSARNIT!”
The three ponies and their pets followed in pursuit, leaving Twilight behind. Twilight chuckled as her plan had worked to perfection.
“Is Spike going to be alright?” asked Sweetie Belle worried.
“Don’t worry about Spike.” Twilight said reassuringly. “He can handle himself. Now, why don’t you take me to your club house and show me that ‘Leprechaun’?”
The two fillies looked at eachother. Scootaloo rubbed the back of her head. “Gee Twilight, we’d love to but I don’t know…”
“You’re not going to take him away from us, are you?” asked Sweetie Belle worried.
Twilight was at a loss for words. She hadn’t expected this.
“We just want to earn our Leprechaun Experts cutie marks.” she then added.
Twilight felt a knot in her stomach. As much as she wanted Alex back, she couldn’t just rip him out of the fillies’ hooves like that. She had to make them some kind of exchange or compromise. “Tell you what, my little ponies. How about I help you out with your project…”
“Really? You’d help us get our cutie marks?” chirped Sweetie Belle.
Twilight nodded. “I’ll help you out with the reports and presentations. And in return, you lend him to me. Deal?” The two fillies looked at eachother and nodded in agreement. It seemed fair enough. “So, how about you take me to him?”
*****
Not too far away, Spike was running for dear life as the ponies slowly but steadily gained on him. He tried to create as much distance from them and Twilight as possible. Applejack suddenly used her lasso and managed to throw it around Spike’s tail. With one yank, Spike tumbled to the ground and was quickly pinned down by Winona and Angel. The ponies ran up and surrounded him.
“Hand ‘im over, Spike!” demanded Applejack.
“Um… Please?” Fluttershy whispered.
“No.” Spike answered and held his concealment close.
“Spike?” Applejack’s eyes narrowed.
“I said NO!”
“Move aside girls!” Pinkie Pie pushed the others roughly away, cracked her hooves and gripped firmly around his arms to pry open his claws. Spike struggled as he used all his strength to keep them shut, but ultimately discovered he didn’t have the strength to fight her. Pinkie grinned as she saw that he was starting to get tired. “I have you now!”
With one suppressed ‘grunt’, Pinkie finally pried his claws open. “AHA!”
WHAM!
“GETITOFFGETITOFFGETITOFF!!!”
A spider concealed in Spike’s claws suddenly jumped up in Pinkie Pie’s face.
Applejack and Fluttershy stared deadpanned at Pinkie as she tumbled around on the grass before turning their sights back on Spike, who now sat there laughing nervously.
“Eh… Hehe. Sorry..?”
Applejack scowled at him before realizing that one of them was missing. “Hey! Where’s Twi?” Fluttershy just shrugged while Pinkie Pie kept rolling around on the ground behind them.
“-GETITOFFGETITOFFGETITOFFGETITOFFGETITOFFGETITOFF!!!”
*****
“So… He’s not a Leprechaun?” asked Sweetie Belle as she and Scootaloo led Twilight back to their club house.
“I’m sorry girls.” Twilight said. “He’s actually a human from another world.”
“Darn it!” Scootaloo groaned. “He even lied about that too! Now we’ll never get our Leprechaun Expert cutie marks.”
“Don’t look so gloomy, Scootaloo.” Sweetie said, trying to cheer her up. “Now that we know what he really is, we can be Human Experts.”
Scootaloo’s ears perked. That seemed to cheer her up. “Your right!” She skid the scooter to a halt and they huddled together.
“CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS; HUMAN EXPERTS! YAY!”
Twilight gritted her teeth and rubbed her ear with her hoof in agony. She admired the spirit of these fillies, yet she kind of wished they wouldn’t yell like that every time. Still, she didn’t have time to be concerned about that. Right now she had to get to Alex. She was more concerned for his wellbeing.
It wasn’t long before they finally reached the club house. Twilight’s heart was racing. She was so close to finally getting Alex back. They all went up and Scootaloo opened the door.
“Applebloom? We're back! We brought Twilight and… Applebloom?” Applebloom wasn’t there.
“Where’s Applebloom?” asked Sweetie Belle.
“Applebloom isn’t here?” asked Twilight.
“She said she’d stay behind to watch…” Scootaloo pointed at the table, only to gasp. The jar was gone. “He’s gone!”
“What!?” yelled Twilight.
“Applebloom and Alex are gone!” exclaimed Scootaloo.
“But… She said she was going to stay here and keep an eye on him. Where could they’ve gone?” asked a worried Sweetie Belle.
Twilight glanced at the table. She then eyed the interior of the club house before drawing her sights back outside. Using her magic, she cast a spell that made hoofprints made in the last 24 hours to appear. And boy there were a lot of hoofprints…
One track of hoofprints however, led down a different path away from the club house.
“Those tracks lead to the Everfree Forest!” said Twilight.
“Uh oh…” Scootaloo uttered, drawing Twilight's attention. She held up a note. “I know where she’s going…”