//------------------------------// // The Big Reunion // Story: The Last Temptation of Hondo Flanks // by angelbunny //------------------------------// Crickets chirped away while Hondo Flanks peered into the water over the edge of the dock in front of his house. The moon, which was being particularly capricious tonight, toyed with the idea of coming out from behind the cottony clouds that shrouded it but never showed itself entirely, making the sonless stallion who peered back at Hondo somewhat difficult to see. Hondo’s right ear rotated toward his house as he heard his front door open and shut, followed by the same jingling he heard when Rarity first came by and he wondered why the jingle sounded so familiar. A series of hoofsteps which started at the front door concluded right behind him. The next sounds he heard were the gentle chime of his daughter’s horn and the opening of a saddlebag. The jingle rang out again and he turned his head to find that Rarity was levitating a six pack of bottled cider which she set down gently on the dock by his side. A drop of condensation trickled down the neck of the ice cold bottle, inviting Hondo to partake of its chilled contents. Hondo looked at Rarity, then back at the six pack, then back at Rarity. She gave him a gentle smile which he returned with one of his own. “You’re officially my favorite daughter until Sweetie Belle turns twenty-one,” said Hondo jokingly as he levitated one of the bottles from the cardboard carrying case and opened it. “After that, it’s between whichever one of you buys me cider last.” He brought the bottle to his lips, tipped his head back and drank heartily. “Oh, what a relief,” said Rarity with a sarcastic smirk. “I was afraid that winning your favor would be based on something arbitrary.” She nuzzled her father affectionately. “Have a good night, Father – and remember...” “I know, I know. ‘Enjoy responsibly’. G’night, kiddo. Love you.” “I love you, too, Father. I’ll try to stop by more often.” “Is that so? Then I look forward to the pleasure of your company.” He raised his bottle and waved it around. “Especially if you bring more of these along with you.” Rarity grinned as she rolled her eyes and shook her head. She left her father to enjoy his drink and headed home. Hondo grew tired of lounging around the dock and he decided to go to the front lawn where he would be able to enjoy his libation while lying on his deck chair. “Excuse me, sir,” said a mare’s voice that came from behind him. Hondo turned around and saw an earth pony mare standing in front of him. She had a tan coat, a dirty blonde mane and tail, and beautiful blue-green eyes that reminded him of somepony from long ago. “Oh, hello, miss,” said Hondo as he placed the six pack and bottle down. “What can I do for you?” The mare’s pupils narrowed. She covered her open mouth with her right forehoof and stared at Hondo, seemingly shocked by something. “Oh... my... Celestia,” said the mare. “Hondo Flanks?” Could he have had another fan like Button? He stood up a bit straighter. “That’s me.” he said. “Have we me-” As the moon made its way out from behind the clouds, its illumination gave Hondo a better look at the mare’s face. His jaw dropped. It was now his turn to be shocked – for this was the very somepony from long ago. “Elaina?!” asked Hondo. The mare nodded enthusiastically. “Yes!” she cried. The old acquaintances hugged and laughed. They hadn’t laid eyes upon one another since before he met his future wife Cookie. “Oh, wow! It’s really you!” cried Hondo. “How’ve you been?” “Good, how about you?” “I’m doing just great. What in Celestia’s name are you doing here?” “I live here!” said Elaina, beaming with a smile she couldn’t hide. “Really?” “Really!” “Where? With that jelly loving dude next door?” “What? No, I don’t mean here here. I mean Ponyville here.” “No kidding? Since when?” “For years now.” “Years? And we never bumped into each other before now? That’s crazy! I need to get out more. So you live in Ponyville here... but what are you doing here here?” “I came here here looking for my son. What are you doing here here?” “This is my house house.” Elaina giggled. “Hold on a sec. Are you... Button Mash’s mom?” Elaina gasped. “Yes!” she replied. “Are you Sweetie Belle’s dad?” “Yeah! Ha ha ha!” “Oh, my gosh! Your daughter is dating my son! What a crazy coincidence!” “But even crazier than that is how I got old and fat while Father Time hasn’t touched one hair on your head. You must be, what, thirty five by now?” “Thirty-six... and you are not old and fat.” “Thirty-six... and every bit as smokin’ hot as when we first started dating in high school.” Elaina beamed. “I see you still haven’t lost that trademark flattery that slew all the girls in Hoofington High,” she said. “Is Button still here?” “Actually, you just missed him,” replied Hondo. “Sweetie Belle’s walking him home right now.” “Oh. I hope he behaved himself at dinner. His table manners can be a bit lacking.” “Ah, he was fine. Better than I was at that age, that’s for sure.” “Your daughter must have inherited her father’s charm. No ordinary filly could pull my Button away from video games for very long.” “Oh, yeah, she’s a chip off the old block, all right.” “Have you got pictures?” “Like I’d go anywhere without them!” Hondo levitated his wallet from his shirt pocket and opened up the accordion-folded photo inserts. Elaina sidled up to Hondo and looked at the photos. “This here is my oldest, Rarity... and this is Sweetie Belle.” Now that Elaina was closer, Hondo caught the familiar scent of his old girlfriend’s perfume and he was instantly taken back to yesteryear when she was his to kiss and hold, things that he was ashamed to admit that he yearned to do once more. “Aw, she’s adorable,” said Elaina. “I hope she and Button have better luck as a couple than you and I did.” “Well, there’s not much chance of them getting their hooves on hard cider at a keg party just yet,” said Hondo. “At least, I hope there isn’t.” The unresolved bit of business that tore them apart was now on the table – which only made sense since they wouldn’t have been honest with one another if they had avoided that subject. “That whole mess was all my fault, Hondo,” said Elaina. “I’m really sorry about my behavior at that party. I was a lightweight and I got carried away. I didn’t know my limit and by the time I surpassed it, I was a lost cause.” “You didn’t know your strength, either,” said Hondo as he rubbed the side of his face. “I can still feel the spot where you socked me across the jaw with a right cross for trying to cut you off for having one too many.” “I hit you? Oh, my Celestia, I don’t remember that at all. I am so sorry.” “Eh, don’t worry, it was a long time ago.” “When my father decided to pack us up and move to Las Pegasus the next morning, I was heartbroken. It might have just been me but I felt that you and I had something special but then, like an idiot, I carelessly threw it all away.” “Trust me, El, it wasn’t just you. I almost went off looking for you but Las Pegasus is a pretty big town and I was barely scraping by on the little money I had working down by the docks for my old man. I didn’t stand a ghost of a chance of finding you and I didn’t have had a clue what I would have done next, even if I did find you. And Coach Stirrup would’ve kicked me off the team if my grades dropped... and you knew how badly I wanted to go pro.” “I always wondered about that. Did you ever get drafted by a pro team? I know that was your lifelong dream.” “Nah, turned out that my body knew what I didn’t. The warning signs told me to quit and I did. I could still throw a ball – just not with a half ton of stallion flesh charging at me and knocking me to the ground at the same time. And since that’s kind of the whole point, I retired from the sport at the top of my game. But I met a wonderful mare in college, married her, and started a family so I made a different dream come true. I don’t regret a thing. Well, maybe one little thing.” “Oh? What’s that?” “I never had any sons.” “Oh. I know how you feel. I never had any daughters.” “But what a son you have, El. Let me tell you, I was ready to haze Button all night long for dating my Sweetie Belle – I mean, I had a list and everything – but then he surprised me by knowing about my college hoofball career and we got along so well that I couldn’t go through with any of it. He really is a great kid. But I guess it’d be kind of hard for him to go wrong if he was raised by the kindest, sweetest girl I ever knew.” Elaina smiled. “You’re too kind,” she said. “He could stand to pay a little more attention in school but, overall, I’m very happy with him.” “And what an athlete! We threw a hoofball around for a while and, Elaina, you have got a future hall of famer on your hooves. Once he fills out a little more, I think he could get an athletic scholarship. Maybe he’ll even get to play for the pros. You should really take him to live games. He told me that you don’t. Why is that, if I may ask?” “I guess I never took him to live games because... hoofball reminded me too much of you... and how my biggest mistake cost me the most wonderful relationship I’ve ever had.” “You mean until your husband came along. Right?” Elaina hesitated to reply. “Yes, of course.” She smiled. “But now that I know that you’re doing okay and that I shouldn’t feel so guilty, I could start taking him to live games. He has so much energy that I haven’t felt my age once since he was born.” “Yeah. He made me feel young again, too. But that’s the magic of parenthood. Kids do that to you.” “They sure do. I wish I could give him a sister but...” “But?” Elaina hesitated again. “I don’t know if this is breaking some sort of husband/wife confidentiality,” said Elaina, “but my husband’s developed some... problems in the fertility department recently. As if my marriage needed to be any more strained than it already is.” “Dang, that’s a real shame. It could be those frou-frou tights he wears.” Elaina raised an eyebrow. “How did you... Oh, Button must have told you that he’s a dancer, didn’t he?” “Yeah. Geez Louise, El! I mean, yeah, it was already a given that you’d never find a more macho he-stallion than me to date... but I never thought you’d go to the other end of the spectrum and hook up with a ballerina dude. What do you call him, anyway? A ballerino? A sugar plum fairy?” Elaina smirked and poked Hondo in the chest. “I call him my husband, Mister Wisenheimer,” said Elaina. “And hoofball players wear tights, too, as I recall.” “Oh-ho-ho, don’t you even go there, missy. We hoofball players are all stallion – and we wear cups under those tights to protect our valuables.” “When he’s not on the road, my husband and I keep trying to conceive – but we haven’t struck gold once since having Button. The pressure of aiming for that mark and constantly failing has been getting to him... and to me, too. It’s gotten to the point where he doesn’t even want to hold me anymore, even for the little time that we have together.” “Have you given any thought to adopting? One of Sweetie Belle’s best friends is an orphan and she’s a great kid.” Elaina shook her head. “I’m sure that she’s lovely,” she said, “but I know that adoption’s not for me. It might sound masochistic but I’m craving the physical state of pregnancy. Having a young filly instantly integrated into my family just wouldn’t be the same as carrying her around inside me. I’ve always wanted at least one boy and one girl. And pretty soon, I’ll be at an age where I won’t be able to carry a baby to term safely.” “Cookie had that same concern so she decided we should call it quits after Sweetie Belle was born. And Cookie’s only a year older than you are. Yeah... Life sure has a way of keeping us from the things we want.” Hondo looked up at the moon as he longed for an answer to his earlier prayer. “I’d do anything to have another,” said Elaina. She looked at Hondo and blinked. “Hondo?” “Hm?” She cast her eyes to the ground and then back to his eyes. “Would... you like to help me make one?” she asked. “Huh? Make one what?” “A baby.” Hondo said nothing. He simply stared at Elaina, frozen in a state of shock and incredulousness. “My husband would have no reason to suspect that the baby wouldn’t be his,” continued Elaina. “My grandfather on my mother’s side was a unicorn so if our baby had a horn, I’d have a rock solid alibi. I might give birth to the girl I never had or the boy you never had. Fifty-fifty. Those are pretty good odds, don’t you think? And you and I could have the night together that we never had. Surely you’ve at least thought about what it would be like to be with me.” She straightened his tie. “I know I’ve thought about what it would be like to be with you. I’ve even convinced my husband to wear a mustache when he and I are in bed... and while he doesn’t know it, it’s so that I can secretly fantasize that I’m with you.” Hondo smiled awkwardly as he loosened his collar. “I never did get to find out for myself if the nickname that the other girls gave you was accurate or just a rumor.” Hondo scrunched his eyes shut and sighed. “Magnum,” he muttered. In Hondo’s younger days, he was quite the ladies’ stallion; handsome, athletic, and very eager to please. He had garnered such a reputation as a fantastic lover, particularly centered around a certain part of his anatomy and its impressive size, that he had been nicknamed Magnum by his female fans. Sleeping with him had almost become a rite of passage for the young mares of Hoofington High. What nopony other than Hondo knew was that Elaina, who was seemingly the latest girl in his life, was going to be the last girl in his life. He was so taken with Elaina’s innocent beauty, both inside and out, that he had silently vowed to put his promiscuous ways behind him and make her his steady girlfriend. And, if the fates were kind, maybe even his wife somewhere down the line. Alas, the fates were not kind. One party with alcohol later, their relationship had come to an unsatisfactory end. “Nopony else would have to know,” continued Elaina. “I promise to keep it a secret. Please, Hondo... spend just one night with me. I wouldn’t ask if I wasn’t at the end of my rope. I don’t want to have a stranger’s baby... and both of your girls look very healthy and beautiful. I promise it won’t go any further than one night. If for whatever reason you don’t get me pregnant, it wouldn’t be a total loss, would it? I know how bad it sounds when I say that committing adultery could save my marriage... but honestly, at this point, I don’t see any other way.” She walked closer to Hondo until she was nearly nose to nose with him. “What do you say? Will you help me? Please?” And there you have it, thought Hondo to himself. You prayed for a chance to have a son and Luna hoof delivered Elaina to you. Have you never heard of the phrase “be careful what you wish for; you just might just get it”? The hottest girl you ever knew is throwing herself at you like you’re some kind of movie star. Well, I got news for you, pally. You’re not a movie star. You’re not a cheater, either. Infidelity? At your age? What’s the matter with you? Cut your losses and go home to your boring, happy life, you moron. Hondo placed his right forehoof on Elaina’s shoulder. “Elaina,” said Hondo. “I was nuts about you when we were kids. And looking into those beautiful blue-green eyes of yours that I still think you stole out of a sleeping angel’s head, I don’t think I ever stopped being nuts about you. I don’t mind tellin’ you that, back in the day, I would’ve done absolutely anything that you’d’ve asked me to do, no matter how crazy it was. But what you’re asking here and now, well... things are different.” Elaina ears drooped. She closed her eyes and hung her head as she prepared to listen to a no that was far longer than she wanted to hear. “I wouldn’t be the only one affected by my decision if I agreed to help you,” continued Hondo. “My body doesn’t belong to just me anymore. I love my wife and my daughters and I love the life we’ve built together too much to throw it all away on a one-night stand. My family means everything to me. You can’t bend a vow. You can only break ‘em. Cookie and my girls wouldn’t have to know that I broke my vow... but I’d know... and I’m not very good at keeping secrets from them. They’d be crushed if they found out. And even if they could find it in their hearts to forgive my betrayal, they’d never forget it. It’d kill me if I saw something other than love in their eyes when they look at me.” “And what do you see in my eyes when you look at me?” asked Elaina, making a last ditch attempt to persuade him. Hondo looked into her eyes as he thought long and hard on his answer. “A crying shame of a lost opportunity,” he said. “It’s sad... but it’s true. Elaina, sweetness, I’ve never been more flattered by an offer in my life... but as tempting as it is, I can’t take you up on it. And if your husband means even half as much to you as my wife means to me, I think you owe it to him and your sons to either have a talk with him to see if you can’t iron things out or to go your separate ways and marry a stallion who can give you what your ex-husband couldn’t – without breaking any of the vows you made to him.” Elaina sighed. She opened her eyes halfway and looked away. “You’re right,” she said. “It was selfish and stupid of me to ask such a thing of you. It’s just that you seemed like the answer to my prayers. I got swept up in the moment, not seeing you for so many years... and I actually respect you, too.” She looked up at Hondo with a weak grin. “Although you wouldn’t know it by the way I asked you for your genetic material like you were some kind of vending machine.” “Just don’t go sticking bits in any of my slots,” said Hondo as he stood on his hind legs and covered his plot with his forehooves. “I don’t give change.” Elaina laughed. “Oh, Celestia,” she said. “I can’t tell you how I’ve missed that wit of yours.” She sighed. “I don’t know what else to say except that... I’m sorry.” “Sorry?” asked Hondo. “For what? For reminding an old, washed up has-been that he’s still got it goin’ on? Don’t be. Your offer is a feather in my cap that I can look at when I’m put out to pasture. Selfish? Mmmmmyeah, maybe.... but stupid? The only stupid thing about it was thinking that one night with you would be enough for any stallion.” Elaina blushed as she brushed a stray hair in front of her face back behind her right ear. “I really have missed that flattery,” she said softly, smiling and tilting her head slightly to the left. “What could have been, huh, Hondo?” “Yeah,” he said softly with a gentle grin. “What could have been.” Hondo and Elaina looked at one another a bit longer than they should have. The embers of the love that they shared so many years ago were still smoldering, perhaps no more than a tender kiss away from reignition. But the flames of that love were not meant to burn. And they both knew it. “I should get back,” said Elaina, clearing her throat. “It’s getting late and Button tends to get anxious if he’s home when I’m not around.” “Yeah, take care of yourself, Elaina,” said Hondo. “It was great to see you again. Maybe we’ll run into each other at the schoolhouse when there’s a parent/teacher meeting or a graduation ceremony or something.” “Maybe.” She took a few steps back and took one last look at her lost love. “Good bye, Hondo. For what it’s worth, you’ll always be... ‘the one that got away’.” It was Hondo’s turn to blush. “Wow,” he said, scratching the back of his head. “I’d say something but... honestly, I don’t think I can top that.” Elaina grinned. She turned around and started to walk away. “Oh, hey, Elaina,” said Hondo. “Yes?” asked Elaina, turning to face Hondo again. “Do you clip coupons?” Elaina grinned. “Does it show?” she asked. “Yes, I clip coupons religiously. Why?” Hondo closed his eyes and shook his head with a smirk. Even if he had married Elaina instead of Cookie, he still wouldn’t have escaped that pasttime. “No reason,” said Hondo, opening his eyes. “I guess I just had you pegged as a smart shopper for some nutty reason. Never mind.” He waved to Elaina. “G’bye.” “Bye.” Sleeping with another mare definitely constituted cheating. Looking at another mare’s plot did not – and Hondo took full advantage of that liberty as he watched Elaina’s southern end gyrate hypnotically with each step. He noted that the years had been kind to Elaina’s posterior and his body responded in the same way that it did with all healthy straight stallions taking in such a ripe and delectable sight. The knowledge that he could have had a piece of that made the physical manifestation of his excitement all the more difficult to ignore. With great haste, Hondo galloped to the front door of his house, hoping that his significant other was as interested in reaping the benefits of his excitement as he was. Cookie Crumbles was hard at work organizing her coupons in her binder. A gentle gust of wind blew one of the coupons off the table and before it hit the ground, Cookie levitated it and brought it to her eyes to see which one it was. It was for a product that she hadn’t used in nearly a decade: diapers. Not only did she not remember clipping this one but the window from which the gust could have come – was closed. She looked at the coupon again. Looking to her left, she remembered the spot where Sweetie Belle’s high chair once stood. It was always a challenge to see just how much more baby food would wind up in Sweetie Belle’s mouth than on her coat, Hondo’s coat, or the kitchen floor. The joy that Sweetie Belle brought them was just as great as the joy that Rarity brought them. Babies weren’t just a never-ending series of teething, sleepless nights and accidentally dropped used diapers. There were first steps, first words, bath times, and that baby smell that nothing else on the planet came close to duplicating. Cookie looked through the window at the night sky. There was a full moon out. She remembered something about the moon that she had forgotten. It was a symbol of fertility. If I were to pray to Princess Luna, she wondered, would she be able to grant me a safe pregnancy? The front door opened and Hondo entered the house. “Well, you sure sat out there for a while, huh?” asked Cookie. “I hope you used some of that time to reflect and think about what to say to Sweetie Belle when she gets back. Seems like she’s been gone a while now. She must be having a long talk with Button about-” Hondo wrapped his right foreleg around the back of Cookie’s neck and kissed her. The level of passion she felt in that kiss was off the charts. Cookie lifted her own right foreleg and wrapped it around the back of Hondo’s neck, drawing him closer to savor the expression of love that her wonderful stallion was giving her. She was unaccustomed to receiving romantic kisses such as these. She had even written off receiving them on anything but special occasions, like when she accepted Hondo’s marriage proposal, on their wedding day, when she announced that she was expecting, and on anniversaries. She didn’t want to be suspicious of her husband but if there was one truth about Hondo, it was that he was a creature of habit. Something had happened to compromise his routine. But what? The answer didn’t come to her. What did come to her was the unmistakable feeling of elation and arousal. A romantic kiss such as this was usually a precursor to lovemaking and that always got her blood pumping. She loved his touch, his taste, his smell... ...which was a bit different somehow. She couldn’t have married a stallion that she didn’t love in every way – and love him she did. She knew that age was slowly creeping up on them and that it wouldn’t be long before a nap would sound better than a roll in the hay. So while youth was still somewhat theirs and their libidos still healthy, they would celebrate their love in their dance of delight for as long as they were able. The kiss broke and Hondo followed it with a neck nuzzle. Cookie closed her eyes and nuzzled him back. “Great googily moogily,” panted Cookie into her husband’s ear, smiling widely and sporting bedroom eyes. “All these years of being happily married and you can still sweep me off my hooves with one kiss just like when we were in college.” “Cookie,” said Hondo. “I love you. If you’ll come upstairs with me, I’d love to show you how much. Don’t worry, I’m over the whole ‘son’ thing. I’ll still wear a con-” Cookie gently placed her right forehoof over her husband’s lips to silence him. “Shhhhhhh,” she hushed. “You don’t have to wear anything you don’t want to wear in bed...” She spoke the final word of her sentence slowly and batted her eyelashes at him. “...bayyyyyy-beeeeeee.” Hondo’s eyes lit up. Cookie only called him “baby” twice before. It was a pet name she only used as a good luck charm – for when they were about to conceive. “Does this mean...?” he sputtered. “You wanna... Can we... You’d want to.. Again?” Cookie nodded. “Uh-huh,” she said. “But hurry before I change my mind. Sweetie Belle should be back home any minute so let’s make this a quickie.” Hondo smiled. Princess Luna had come through for him! His heart fluttered as he levitated his wife and joyfully kissed her while trotting up the stairs. A chance at a son! And if that wasn’t enough to put a spring in his step – a chance at having unprotected intercourse with his wife! His heart was doing cartwheels at the thought of both of those prospects. He had arrived at the door and just as he was about to enter their bedroom, Cookie broke the kiss and stuck all four of her legs outward to prevent herself from being carried inside. “What’s wrong?” he asked. “Put me down, please,” she requested flatly. Hondo quickly did as he was told and he saw that Cookie had a very stern look on her face. She leaned forward and looked him square in the eye. “Hondo, did you happen to bump into a mare while you were outside?” In the split second that Hondo had to decide whether or not he should tell her the truth or a lie, he went with a lie. “Only Rarity,” replied Hondo. “Why?” Cookie closed her eyes. “Then would you mind explaining to my satisfaction why you have the faint smell of perfume about you?” asked Cookie. “I hugged Rarity while she was here tonight – and neither she nor I were wearing any fragrance.” Cookie opened her eyes again. They were not happy eyes. They were now-tell-me-the-truth-and-I-might-let-you-live eyes. Hondo scrunched his eyes shut and gulped, immediately regretting his decision. Always a catch, he thought.