“Crap…my head is about to fucking explode…” I moaned as I awoke from my drunken slumber, “and why does my eye hurt so bad!”
“I know the feel,” replied Vinyl. She was lying on the couch barely conscious. “But, unlike you, I’m not a little foal, so I don’t whine about things.”
From my place on the floor, I could barely make out a set of legs in the kitchen. That was the least of my concern. My head hurt, my stomach rolled with every slight movement, and I’m pretty sure I was laying in my own vomit. I slowly rose from the ground making sure I didn’t move too much. Soon, I was standing on my own two feet-barely. I made my way for the kitchen since a delicious smell was coming from there; my eyes were half closed so smell was my only guidance. Too much light and, I would go blind. Fortunately, I made it to the table-barely.
“Ugh…Tesla…where’s my Bloody Mary?” I asked the system, “How else will I make it through this agony?”
“By not being a lil’ bitch.” I heard a female voice reply; it wasn’t Vinyl’s, “You were always a lightweight. Here, drink this instead. It’ll get you back to normal quicker.”
“Anastasia?” I opened my eyes just in time to catch a green liquid headed my way, “Why are you here?”
“Well after you and Vinyl got wasted last night, you both left the club, but forgot your I.Ds. I came here to give them back and found both of you passed out on the front lawn. I had to carry you both in.” Ana explained,” Also, you didn’t pay the tab. I came to collect. It’ll be one- hundred credits. That’s the friend fee.”
“ Friend fee....my ass,” I chugged down the disgusting liquid as fast as I could. It wasn’t the first time Ana saved me from a hangover. “Tesla, transfer one-hundred credits to Ana’s account.”
I felt the money transfer from me to her. I became weaker as she grew stronger. I was slowly starting to dislike her until she slid a breakfast plate in front of me. Eggs, bacon, pancakes, and even hash. All parts of a healthy breakfast. I dove in head first forgetting about my surroundings.
“Not even a thankyou?” Ana sighed. A small smile appeared on her face. “Vinyl, you hungry? There’s plenty here for you.”
“I’m not alive yet. Just stuff the pancakes down my throat and rub.”
“You don’t know how many times I actually had to do that. Unfortunately, I can’t today. I gotta head out. Cya around, guy.” Ana went for the door, “Oh, and you guys should play at the club sometimes. All you have to do is ask.”
“I’ll have to take you up on that offer one day. Till then, Cya around.” I said as I stuffed my face with syrupy pancakes.
“Alright.” With that Ana closed the door, yet stuck her head back in, “Oh, and here comes your witch of a girlfriend. You have about a good minute of solitude.”
Ana officially left my house. I continued to eat as I heard Vinyl literally crawl to the kitchen. She pulled herself up into a chair, laid her head by her plate, and slowly shoveled food into her mouth. Her glasses had fallen to reveal the darkened circles under her eyes and blood sight irises. In a way, her entire eyes was red. Sorta creepy.
We ate in silence. Both had a hangover and didn’t want to cause the other pain with sound. Luckily, thanks to Ana’s remedy, they were slowly fading away. Each second that passed we felt better and better.
“So who was that Ana chick?” Vinyl asked. She got to the point where she could finally raise her head. “She’s pretty hot, thick in the right places, and by the sound of it, has you wrapped around her finger.”
“She’s my best friend since childhood. And don’t get any ideas, or else I’ll tell Octavia.” I responded.
“Don’t worry. I’m stuck to Octy like that vomit is stuck to your shirt.” Vinyl took a bite of eggs, “So I’m guessing she works at the club or something?”
“She owns the club. How else do you think I just stroll in there?” I paused speaking and started to reminisce, “She took out a loan, bought the abandoned space, fixed it up, put out some advertising, and boom! One of the best night clubs in L.A. She even let me play the first night where no one else would. Coincidentally, that’s how I was found. I owe her everything.”
“She seems like a nice match for you.”
“Please...She’s just a friend. And this won’t turn into a best friend into relationship story. She’s just a friend.”
“Alright, bro. I’m just saying.” Vinyl stood from her seat and gathered the dishes, “Ana would make a better fit for you than the witch coming in.”
I turned to my door to see my girlfriend stepping into my house. Her hair was dyed purple, her skirt was way too short, and she carried an animatronic dog in her purse. A heart tattoo decorated the side of her neck surrounded by lipstick kiss tattoos. She walked toward the kitchen. She kneeled down to quickly kiss my cheek before staring in disgust at Vinyl.
I knew Vinyl could feel the eyes glaring at her, but she did her best to ignore them. To occupy her time, she did the dishes. One at a time, she used her magic to levitate a plate into the water, wash them, dry them, and then stacked perfectly into the cabinet. Though, I didn’t know why she just didn’t use the dish washer.
“Hey, baby. What brings you around?” I asked as I hugged her waist.
“What…the…hell…is that thing?” she responded. Her voice was just as stereotypical of a blonde girl as it could be.
“Her name is Vinyl Scratch. She my friend, Chloe.” I answered. Her name was just as stereotypical.
“Can’t…it like talk or like…does it only neigh? Can I ride it? You know, I always wanted to ride a horse.”
“Yes, I can talk…No, you can’t ride me…” Vinyl chimed in, “and I’m a pony…Stupid bitch…”
“What did it call me?”
“Nothing…nothing.”
I grabbed Chloe’s arm and pulled her into the living room. There we sat down on the sofa. The silence wasn’t awkward, but I believe Chloe wanted me to speak first before
she did. Specifically, about Vinyl. For now, I would steer clear of that topic.
“So, uh, what brings you here?” I asked again.
“Oh, I was just in the neighborhood. Thought I would just drop by to see my most favorite guy in the world.”
“Well, that’s nic-”
“Plus, I need you to take me and my girlfriends to the mall.”
“Don’t you have a car?”
“It’s too small to hold the three of us.”Chloe leaned to my ear to whisper the rest, “Between you and me, Jessica has gained some weight.”
“I would love to, but I’m just coming off of a hangover…”
“Please…” Chloe opened her eyes wide and puckered her lips. Her blue eyes sparkled in the sunlight making her look ever so innocent. Or maybe I was imagining it. Either way, I couldn’t resist it for much longer.
“Alright, alright…I’ll take you to the mall.” I couldn’t help but smile. I fell for that trick more time than I could count. “Yo, Vinyl! We’re going on another trip. Get your flank ready!”
“Whoopie!” replied Vinyl sarcastically.
“OMG! You’re bringing the horse. Why?” complained you know who.
“And you’re using texting language in real life again. I’m bringing Vinyl because it’s the nice thing to do. She’s my friend, and you’re my girlfriend. You guys should get to know each other.”
“What…ever.”
After some debate about seat position, we all climbed into my Honda. It was settled that Chloe received the front passenger seat while Vinyl decided her position in the back. I could tell the unicorn didn’t like the position, but she accepted it to keep everything calm. I could tell she was trying to be a good friend. No, she was being a good friend.
I started my car and drove to pick up the other passengers. What I didn’t know was that they were half way across this city. The ride was filled with awkward torment. Vinyl tried to make conversation with Chloe who only responded with short sentences. Soon, she gave up. To fill the silence of the ride, I told Vinyl about the city. From its past to the food, I didn’t leave anything out. That really got her interested, but the fun died when we reached Chloe’s friends who each screamed with delight at the sound of her.
“Who’s ready for a day at the mall!!” Chloe asked as we pulled up to a mansion. The place made my home look like a tin shack in Haiti. (Well, thirty years ago Haiti. After they recovered from the natural disasters, massive gold and silver mines were found. Lucky them.) Both girls, who had too much makeup on, climbed into my car. Then they all shrieked again. I noticed that they didn’t seem to mind Vinyl much which was a good thing, yet they still kept from any unnecessary touching.
“To the mall, Mason!” Chloe ordered. For a second, I believed I was her chauffeur instead of her boyfriend.
“As you wish, madam.” I said then turned on the radio. Immediately did the local EDM station tune in. The speakers began pumping out the tune and the subwoofer spitting out the bass causing the car to vibrate. Instinctively, Vinyl and I started rocking our head to the beat, but Chloe ended our fun when she turned the radio to another station…a pop one. And of course did the three passengers shriek when one of their favorite songs came on the radio.
I looked in the rearview memory to see Vinyl make her hand into a pistol shape, put it in her mouth, and pull the trigger. Her body went limp against the back seat. When she “revived” I did the same thing, but used a shot gun. She smiled before pulling out a samurai sword and committing seppuku. I responded back by tying a noose around my neck and jumping. Amidst our game, we forgot that Chloe and her friends were in the car. They didn’t appreciate our game too much, so we stopped. Vinyl went back to looking out the window, and I began driving, but not before handing her my phone and earphones with all my music on it. She smiled before putting the buds into her ear and separating herself from the world.
(Vinyl’s POV)
I hate Chloe and her friends. But my mom told me to get know a pony before I judge them. Celestia only knew why Mason would go for a mare like that. She must have him under a love potion or something. Maybe a love poison? I heard that stuff was dangerous. Gives ponies the strength to move houses and stuff.
We arrived to the mall, thanks Celestia. I could hear their bad singing and screaming over the earphones. I even had them on max. As soon as the carriage stopped, I climbed at out for fresh air. Mason stepped out and stretched. He seemed to be irritated about the situation in the car also. The girls jumped out of the carriage and ran into the mall, leaving Mason and me alone. We each took a heavy sigh, and walked into the mall.
We were too far behind the girl to track them down, so we settled to wait in the food court for them to arrive. Even though we both just ate, we both decided to get something to it to fill the barely empty areas in our bellies. Mason ordered a cheese burger while I opted for hay sandwich. Though, they didn’t have any, so they simply made a burger without the actual meat and cheese, leaving only the tomato and lettuce.
Mason went to take a bite of his burger yet stopped and looked me in the eyes. “Uh…I know in Equestria cows have personalities…so is this…”
“Don’t worry. I know you guys eat meat.” I reached my hand across our small table and took a pinch of meat from his burger and ate it, “Taste weird. I’m not saying I hate it, but I don’t love it. How do you eat it?”
“Because it’s bloody delicious.” Mason responded, taking another bite.
“If you say so.” I took a bit of my sandwich. I misjudged my grip and the tomato slipped out. It was in slow motion as the vegetable (fruit?) descended, and then landed onto my sweat suit. I peeled the red fruit (vegetable?) from my suit. A red stain was left on the pure whiteness of my clothes. It was a shame…these were my favorite clothes.
“Dammit…”
“I don’t think that stain is gonna come out, Vinyl.” Mason said still chewing his food, “Don’t you have other clothes?”
“No. I only brought this with me. “I motioned to my suit, “and it’s ruined…”
“Well, I guess we better get you new ones.”
Mason grabbed my hand and pulled me to the stores. The shopping all went in a blur as we went from store to store. Unfortunately, the stores carried nothing I wanted. Absolutely nothing. It was either too bright and happy, too dark and grim, or too…I don’t know. Just not me. So I settled on simple things. A couple pairs of slim-fitting pants, T shirts, tank tops, and shorts. Being the nice guy he is, Mason paid for it all.
“Aren’t you going to buy you something?” I asked.
“Naw. I don’t need anything.” He replied.
“Yeah ya do.” I grabbed a pair of Sunglasses from the rack and placed them on his face, “ You need to cover up that black eye of yours. It’s grossing me out.”
He looked into the mirror on the counter and smiled. “Add the glasses to the purchase,please”