The Dead Stallion's Hand

by Lord Zalgo


The Calm...

Sunlight illuminated the city of Canterlot as a shadowy figure looked out of his window, watching the city begin to fill with life. He waited impatiently as time seemed to tick by at a snail's pace. He growled quietly in annoyance before a knock came at the door.

"Enter." The Boss instructed. The door opened to reveal Valliere with a number of ponies entered the office behind her.

"I've brought the recruits that you wanted. They say they're spies." Valliere said. The Boss rose from his seat with an unimpressed scowl on his face.

"It took you long enough. Why would it take you three weeks to track them all down?" The Boss complained.

"...With all due respect, sir; they're all spies." Valliere emphasised. The Boss simply growled softly before turning to the first spy. He was a unicorn stallion with blood red fur, a ginger mane and tail with bright green eyes. His cutie mark depicted an explosion from a firework.

"Well? Are you any good at what you do?" The Boss asked sceptically.

"To put it plainly, lad; I'm the best in all of Coltland. I can't say for the rest o' this lot, but I'd like to say that they're as good as me." The stallion replied with a thick Coltic accent. The Boss, Valliere and the rest of the spies watched him in slight shock at his boldness. The Boss then walk forward and pushed his face against the stallion aggressively.

"Who do you think you are?!" The Boss said aggressively.

"...I'm Tartan Pepper. And I suggest you back up, laddie." Tartan replied, his horn glowing black with a small dagger that was ready to pierce the Boss's abdomen.

"You would threaten me? Are you that foolish?" The Boss asked.

"I could ask you the same thing, buddy boy." Tartan replied in kind. The Boss finally backed off before turning towards the next spy.

"Name." The Boss said simply.

"Fen Seed." Fen replied. Fen had a lime green coat, with no mane or tale, green/yellow eyes and a flower cutie mark. He had several bottles strapped to a bandolier on his chest, each labelled with a different poison. The Boss moved onto the next pony.

"Cinnamon Apple." The stallion said with a strong Appleloosian accent before the Boss could ask. He had a bland, orange coat, a bright brown mane and tail and dark green eyes. His cutie mark was that of an apple and a single cinnamon stick. He also appeared to have some form of braces on his hooves and some kind of eyepiece in the form of a scope. The Boss paid them no mind as he moved on.

"Star Spice." The last stallion said in a muffled voice, but it was still understandable. He had a bright grey coat, a black, spiky mane and tail. However, his entire face was covered by a gas mask and the rest of his body was covered by the full-body, black, fireproof suit he was wearing. The Boss shrugged off a little uneasiness as he walked past and looked at the final spy and the only mare in the room, other than Valliere.

"And you?" The Boss said. The mare didn't reply. She merely stared back at the Boss. She was completely clad in a black karategi and a ninja mask with a long, black headband; but her body was still visible. She had a blue/grey coat, a black/brown mane and tail that were tied up into ponytails, her eyes were dark grey and her cutie mark was that of a shuriken. In fact, she had several shuriken and kunai on a bandolier strapped to her karategi.

"Answer me!" The Boss demanded. Valliere stepped forward.

"Sir, she's taken a vow of silence. Her name is Clover Evergreen. She is one of the most skilled ninjas in Equestria." Valliere explained.

"None of you seem to be spies." The Boss said, annoyed.

"Well, we're closer to... assassins for hire. But, we tend to infiltrate places in our line of work. What do you need us for?" Fen asked. The Boss walked back to his seat and sat down.

"I need you to keep me informed about specific targets. And... later down the line... if any of them discover our plans... you take the fuckers out." The Boss said, his back turned to everypony.

"Well, that's right up our alley, partner. Who're the targets?" Cinnamon asked. The Boss turned back to them and turned to each of them, giving them their individual targets.

"Cinnamon, you appear to be some kind of sniper. I want you to keep track of Fancypants Von Trottingham, one of the most influential ponies in the business world currently living. He is surprisingly observant, so keep your distance." The Boss instructed.

"That's mah bread and butter right there." Cinnamon said with a smile.

"Fen, you will keep track of Golden Badge: the chief of the Canterlot Police Department. He's an alcoholic, so if he begins to suspect something, you can always poison his brandy." The Boss instructed. Fen simply nodded as the Boss moved on.

"Star, I want you to watch the mayor, Cloud Fortesque. He is a particular loose cannon. Should this plan turn sour, we still have a chance to manipulate him, but only as a backup plan." The Boss said, to which Star nodded in response.

"Clover, you have one of the most difficult tasks. You must keep track of Shining Armour. He is a top choice to be made Captain of Celestia's royal guard. We cannot risk being in the dark about such a position. Make sure you are not spotted once. He is a legend in the making when it comes to his skills and abilities. Be very wary." The Boss warned. Clover bowed as a sign that she understood. The Boss finally turned to the final spy.

"Tartan. You do have the most difficult task of all. You must keep track of... Twilight Sparkle and her friends. They are the most uncontrollable variables in our plan. They have undying unity to each other and undying loyalty to the Princesses. We cannot allow them to make a move without our knowledge. Understood?" The Boss said seriously.

"Aye. I get it. And, don't let them discover why I'm there?" Tartan asked.

"Precisely. Sparkle has a quick, untraceable and unstoppable message link with Princess Celestia. You would be kissing the surface of the Moon before you could utter a single fucking syllable." The Boss said in a raised voice.

"Right. No pressure." Tartan replied. The Boss motioned for them to leave, causing all six ponies to comply and the five spies to prepare to move to the locations in which their targets resided.


"Tia? Do you think it went well?" Luna asked.

"I believe so. The spell says they are still alive." Celestia replied.

"...Maybe this wasn't a good idea. We've sent a mouse into the lion's den and asked them to come back in one piece." Luna said, worriedly.

"Well, more like a rat, really." Celestia replied.

"The rodent doesn't matter, Tia. We've sent a pony into a situation where death could come at them in any minute!" Luna replied, her worries elevating.

"What choice did we have, Luna? We needed evidence and sending in an informant was the only option we had that would allow them to catch on immediately. We will protect them, should their cover be compromised." Celestia said, trying to calm her sister. Luna took a few deep breaths before sighing.

"Alright, but should we need to extract them, we are to do it immediately. No exceptions." Luna said.

"Agreed. May the Sun and stars watch over them." Celestia replied and added a small prayer for their mole.