//------------------------------// // Life Goes On // Story: What Comes Next // by Rocket Blaze //------------------------------// As Rainbow Dash awoke the next day, Luna's promise repeated itself in her mind. With the benefit of hindsight, she had no difficulty believing that she did indeed survive the hardest day of her life. Perhaps that also meant that the next day would truly be easier than the one before, and hopefully the next one better than that. Regardless of her luck, the conversation she'd had with Fluttershy the night prior affirmed that she could not do it alone. Without reservation she told Fluttershy about her dream, and how she'd not needed to be asleep to experience it. With helping hooves, Rainbow Dash collected her cherished posessions that she felt safe taking with her: Her Daring Do books, her favorite blanket, some pictures of her and her friends, and Tank, who seemed genuinely relieved to be experiencing a change of scenery. All of it was loaded into Twilight's balloon, still perched stoically at the edge of the cloud. With all said and done, Rainbow Dash climbed into the basket followed by Fluttershy, who kicked the balloon off of the edge to send them on their way to the vale. Rearranging Fluttershy's home had left Dash feeling exhausted, but the night did not represent a significant improvement from the previous one. Fluttershy did not have a spare bed for Dash to sleep on, so they decided to sleep together that Fluttershy may be there for her friend should the night terrors arrive again. Being so close to her friend did help Rainbow Dash to stay calm amidst her clear uneasiness, although the morning saw Rainbow Dash feeling just as tired as she had the night before. Fluttershy tried hard to get Rainbow Dash to stay home while she returned the balloon to Twilight. Dash insisted that if she tied a rope around her waist and only partially inflated the balloon, she'd be able to run it back into town. "Dashie, you're too tired. I don't want you to get hurt!" But Rainbow Dash eventually convinced her that she could handle it. "And besides," Dash encouraged "I need the exercise!" It was a long run back to Ponyville, but Rainbow Dash enjoyed being free to run again. Her hooves had healed to the point that she no longer felt pain as she ran, although her flanks twinged slightly against the strain of the balloon. Fluttershy pushed from behind, her wings straining to match speeds with the far more athletic Rainbow Dash. "My balloon!" Twilight cheered when she saw it. "I was wondering where it went off to. The clouds were too thick for me to properly view Cannus Major last night, so I went looking for it to try to get above them. Why didn't you just ask for it, Rainbow?" Rainbow Dash smiled and brushed her hoof through her mane nervously. "I thought I did, Twilight. So sorry!" Twilight smiled. "It's okay! Maybe you did. I hardly remember anything from the last few days anyway. I'm glad you're feeling better though!" *** Day and night blurred into one another as Rainbow Dash searched for ways to make herself useful, despite Fluttershy's insistence that she focus on herself. If she couldn't fly, the least she could do would be some household chores, or maybe even tending to the animals who called Fluttershy's vale home. The latter task was more difficult than Dash had imagined. One day while trying to catch a raccoon that had taken to eating bird eggs straight from the nest, she ended up accidentally scaring the family she was trying to protect. The angry mother promptly took to pecking at Rainbow Dash as she fled, sending her into a bush hosting a nest of angry bees. She spent the rest of the day reading her books while covered head-to-toe in poxy bee stings. The rabbits, however, seemed to enjoy racing Rainbow Dash around the property, though once Dash had gotten competitive it ended up discouraging the rabbits. She tried once to let them win but that didn't help to salve the lost sense she was feeling. "Perhaps I should find something else for you to do," Fluttershy teased. When she wasn't moving logs for the resident beavers on Fluttershy's land, or guarding the ducklings as their mother marched them from pond to pond, she was catching up on her reading. Daring Do became her escape into a fantastic world where she could still fly, and used those wings and her wits to defeat the dreaded Ahuizotl over, and over again. Oh, if only this could last forever. Rainbow Dash thought, longingly. The most difficult days were the ones on which she could see the distant silhouettes of pegasi moving the clouds to shade the trees and ring in the fall season one beautiful brown leaf at a time. "That should be me..." she muttered to herself whenever Fluttershy wasn't around to hear. At least the colors were pleasing at first, but soon Dash found herself desensitized to the sights as she sunk once more into the deep depression that had been haunting her for weeks. During these bouts, she would find her mind wandering to the less savory thoughts that tortured her since she woke up in the hospital so many days ago. Her nightmares remained as a constant presence in her life, although most nights she would recognize the signs and train herself to wake up, calm herself, then get back to sleep. Fluttershy's company was a big part of what got her through the nights. However, some nights the fear didn't vanish so easily when she awoke. More than once did Pinkie visit her outside of her sleep. Sometimes more vividly than others. The worst instance saw Rainbow Dash fleeing outside to hide in the darkness among the trees. Fluttershy had awoken during the scramble and followed the soft echoing sobs through the forest to find Rainbow Dash terrified and alone. Compounding her frustration was the guilt she felt at having not been nearly as present for her other friends as she'd have liked. Fluttershy's seclusion meant that company was never close in hoof. Although she knew her friends were thinking about her, she also knew that they had their own lives to attend to. Life goes on for everypony else she reflected, feeling bitter. "I need something to do." she told Fluttershy woefully. "Something else I mean. Don't get me wrong - I'm happy to help! But I still don't feel useful." "Oh Dashie, you're always useful. You don't have to be running chores to contribute. Just having you here is making the animals happy, which makes my job easier too!" "Awww thank you, Fluttershy." Rainbow Dash blushed. "But you know, I really want a job of my own. I just don't know what it could be..." She looked at her haunches, which had healed almost entirely. "Being without my cutie mark is like having a fresh start, but I don't know where to find it. Now I know how Scootaloo and her friends feel when they go off on crazy adventures together. They just want to find their place... And so do I." Fluttershy nodded. "That's the right attitude, Dashie." "But I'm not sure where to start looking. I'd probably make a terrible acrobat without my wings." she smiled. Fluttershy looked confused "An... Acrobat? But... Why?" "Oh, no reason." she snickered. "Those 'Cutie Mark Crusaders' will do anything. I should be willing to do the same!" "But not an acrobat?" Fluttershy asked sweetly. Rainbow Dash looked up into the trees where squirrels jumped effortlessly from limb to limb. "No, not that. Too hard! I think I should go to Sweet Apple Acres to visit with Applejack. I haven't really seen her since the hospital, and I'm sure she could use my help around the farm. Who knows - maybe being a really awesome Earth pony is my new destiny!" "You rock, Rainbow Dash!" and with that, Rainbow Dash was cantering down the road towards Sweet Apple Acres as fast as her hooves could take her. *** Sweet Apple Acres had changed significantly since the last time Rainbow Dash saw it, but not for the better. Unpicked apples clung tentatively to the auburn trees grown lousy with crows and other farm pests, their bows drooping low under the cumulative weight. The farmhouse in which the Apple family took up residence had begun to show signs of disrepair. What has Applejack been doing lately? Rainbow Dash wondered. Rapping her hoof on the farmhouse door, Rainbow Dash looked all around her. Half-filled bushels peaked out through the open barn door, with nopony tending to their care. It looked like any hope of a strong cider season this year was gone, but Rainbow Dash feared deeply what this meant for Applejack herself. After a long wait, the door opened a crack. A lone green eye - droopy from lack of sleep - peered out at her. "Uh, Applejack? It's me! You, uh... Gonna let me in?" "Yeah... Yeah, o'course." Slowly creeping open, Rainbow Dash could see that Applejack wasn't in much of a better state than she had been before moving in with Fluttershy. Her mane was unkempt, her eyes itchy and red, and her coat was spotted with mats. Rainbow Dash crossed the threshold with a worried expression etched onto her face. "Applejack. Uh, are you okay? I've never seen you like this before. And where's Big Macintosh? Granny Smith? Apple Bloom?" Applejack sighed. "They went away for a little while, Rainbow. Gone to visit family'n Appleoosa or somethin'. I don't really remember, to be honest." "And they left you to take care of the farm all by yourself? Like this!?" "Well, uh..." She rubbed the back of her head uneasily. "I told 'em I had this. We been fightin' a lot lately. I think they needed a break." "It sure doesn't look like you have this, Applejack. You're a mess! What happened!?" "I don't want to talk about it Rainbow Dash..." she barked. There was an uncomfortable silence during which Applejack scanned Rainbow Dash from top to bottom. "You're lookin' better." "I had help. Which is something you look like you need." Applejack scoffed, looking indignified. "Well, I'll have you know that... Oh, dog gonnit..." she stopped in place and looked down at her hooves. "Okay, you're right. Ya happy?" "Why don't we get out of here and you can tell me what's been going on." Applejack nodded and stepped outside through the still-open door, Rainbow Dash following closely. Once freed of the confines of the farmhouse and out amongst the fresh fall air did Applejack begin to revert from her strangely guarded demeanor. "I'm sorry Rainbow Dash. I ain't too sure what's been up with me lately." "It's okay, girl. That's why I'm here!" Rainbow Dash gave her a friendly nudge. Applejack gave a forced smile in return, which gave Dash pause. "What is it?" she pressed. Applejack sighed as she gazed up into the sky, letting the warm sun beat on her downtrodden face. "I haven't been able to stop thinking about that day. I know it's silly, cause I was the one who came'n saved you'n all... But somethin' about it stuck with me. I don't know what it is." "Have you been to see anypony? Twilight? Fluttershy?" "Naw. I just... I didn't think they'd understand. I told 'em I had to buck some apples. I tried, Rainbow Dash, I really did. But I just got started'n, well... I never got very far before I'd start feelin' things I never felt a'fore. After a while I 'spose I just gave up." "Applejack, I... I don't want to put it this way but you know, I was there too. And you know what's been helping me get through it so far?" "Your friends... I know... But I-" "-No need for buts, Applejack. I'm here now!" Applejack's voice dropped to a whisper. "Rainbow Dash... I ain't even told ya the half of it." Rainbow Dash blinked. "Well... Why don't you tell me?" Applejack shook her head and wandered off down the road, leaving Rainbow Dash staring after her in her wake. "You'd just think I'm crazy," she called over her shoulder. Frustrated, Rainbow Dash sauntered to the nearest tree, turned, and bucked it as hard as she could. Apples fell from its bows with a series of light thunks. Applejack stopped in her tracks and looked back. "Uh, what're ya doin'?" "You don't have to do this by yourself, Applejack. I've been going through the same things! Let me guess... You've been having bad dreams. Right?" Applejack nodded. "Waking up in the middle of the night?" She nodded again. "Do you see things now? Things that can't be there?" There was a long pause, but Applejack cleared her throat and nodded again. Rainbow Dash trotted up to her friend and looked at her right in the eye. "Me too! "But we don't have to go it alone, you know. I'd be nowhere without Twilight, or Fluttershy, or Rarity... But I wouldn't even be here without you. Now it's my turn to help." She gestured back at the apples she'd just kicked out of their tree. "Let's see if we can't save some more apples from the harvest before cider season." Applejack just shook her head. "I 'preciate it, Rainbow Dash. I really do. But I'm 'fraid there ain't gonna be a cider season this year." She started trotting back to the farmhouse, but then paused. "I haven't told ya everything... I've been..." she stared intently at the ground. "Applejack. What is it?" "There's times I can't... It's like I just forget things. Long times I just can't account for. And I dunno where I've been going or what I've been doing, but then I have nightmares of things where I'm..." she shook her head and rapidly changed the subject. "...On top of all that, I went..." she swallowed "...I went back to Sugarcube Corner. I thought it might help to go back'n get some closure. Ya know?" She paused to let Rainbow Dash nod. "Well, I went inside and the Cakes, they was tendin' the place... They looked at me'n said 'We were so surprised to hear about Pinkie.' That's it... They were 'surprised,' like it weren't no big deal." Rainbow Dash took a few more steps toward her friend. "Did it help?" "No it didn't. But here's the weird part... I told 'em that I had some things in Pinkie's room I wanted to get, and went up to see for myself. I'm not sure why I wanted to see the place where... Where it all happened... But when I opened up the chest she had her secret way in, it was empty... Just a normal chest. No passageway. No staircase. No nothin'. It's like it never even happened." "Well that seems strange..." Rainbow Dash said encouragingly, though in truth she didn't really want to think about the dungeon in which she'd been held for the most grueling fifteen minutes of her life. She pressed no further, and let Applejack continue. "All of these things; these feelings, this way I've been feeling... I can't imagine how anything's ever gonna be normal ever again. I'm not sure it ever should be normal again..." Rainbow Dash turned her head to the side, puzzled. "I'm right there with ya, Applejack. But we're here right now, together. Perhaps it won't be normal, but that doesn't matter; it doesn't mean it has to be bad! We can move forward together." "It does matter, Rainbow Dash! 'Cause she was my friend too, and she didn't just betray you! She betrayed everypony!" She shook her head violently. "But I was the one that... To rescue you... You know? I'm the one that did it! I didn't want to... But I didn't want you to get hurt! That didn't make it easy! I can't just... Move on. It doesn't work that way. I can't just start pickin' apples again like nothin' happened. I'm sorry." She trotted back to the farmhouse, alone. Rainbow Dash stared down the road after her, stunned. However, she decided not to follow. She had something better in mind.