“It was the details of the cart that gave me the idea,” Albert was saying. Karyn had figured it out, but she concluded that, for a detective, being able to explain everything had to be a highlight of the job. “The neatly sawn harness. It made no sense unless it wasn’t sawn, but cut off because the cart had simply vanished, because it was coming into our world and there was a limited range, like in the beginning of the Terminator movies.”
Karyn made a note to explain that to Derpy, and possibly to show her the movies in question, but she was more concerned with the immediate situation. “But how did they get here?”
“I’m not sure, but if I know you as an IT person, you have backups, and that would include for your...” He swallowed as if the word hurt him. “spells. So it’s possible that these salesmen...”
“Salesponies,” said Derpy.
“...found a way to get ahold of that.”
“He’s right! I still never got the bag back from Dinky. They could have come to Ponyville through Canterlot and stole it on the way.”
Albert said nothing, but wore his pensive look again.
Karyn leered at him. “Looks like you’re a pretty good detective even when magic is involved.”
“I don’t know the details of how it works, and I don’t want to. But I can look at it objectively and deduce from that. Case in point. Even though I don’t particularly care to see them, I could interrogate a pony. Or two, in this case.”
“Now hang on. We can’t just...what’s the point?”
He looked at her as she would at some of her amateur users. “Because even if we know that they’re here, we don’t know why they’re here, what their goals are, how they’re going to do whatever it is they’re going to do, and who...there’s a lot we don’t know.”
Karyn looked toward where she believed Derpy to be, hoping that somehow she could assist in the argument and make him see how foolish and dangerous it would be.
“I’m afraid he’s right,” said Derpy. “We’ve got to stop them now before they do whatever they’re trying, and more importantly, we need to get the bag back. I’ll never be so neglectful with it again!”
“So we’re all on board.” Albert looked to the river. “Now, the nearest crossing is a few miles away and, since I don’t fancy getting wet, we should take the cars.”
“We could cross over right here.”
“Derpy,” said Karyn, “please remember that we can’t all fly.”
“No, what I was talking about was what we did before. Go over to Equestria, walk across whatever’s there until we come to the other side of the river, and then come back.”
“Yeah, we’re not going to do that.” Albert got out his car keys to emphasize the point. “You can use your freaky magic all you want on your own, but leave me out of it.”
“And how are you going to get to them without alerting them to your presence? They’re probably on high alert already.”
“I’m a detect—you know what, I’m not going to stand here arguing with a pony.”
Karyn could, at time, be ornery. It was, of course, perfectly within Albert’s right to disdain magic and all of Equestria. But she didn’t think it was fair of him to specifically insult her friend. “Derpy, grab him and let’s go.”
She got in close and found a wing to grab onto, as moments later they were no longer beside the river, but standing in front of a green hill in the Equestrian night.
“What the he—“ Albert began.
“Ah, ah, ah.” Karyn was enjoying this now. “No cursing in Equestria. Unless you want to say, ‘Buck.’ That’s allowed, I think. Now come on, let’s get over the hill. You don’t want to stay here any more than you have to, and nopony here wants you either.”
“That’s a little harsh,” said Derpy, “but I’m inclined to agree.”
Walking the incline of the hill was tough work for both of the humans, but they made it over. At that point, Karyn said, “Are you sure that we’ve gone far enough to avoid the river? I don’t want to get soaked.”
“Oh, yeah. Almost entirely sure.”
She knew that that was Derpy’s expression for when she was sure, but was too shy to commit to saying so and wanted an out just in case. But of course Albert took her literally, and panicked for falling in the river as Derpy returned them all to Earth. Her directional sense had worked perfectly, and not only were they across the river, but the glow of the lights were tantalizingly close.
“Now what do we do?” asked Karyn.
Albert contemplated. “Well, you tell me. What’s going to happen if we just run up there and confont them? Will they fire some death spell at us?”
“To my knowledge no unicorn has worked on a death spell. From what I know, if it is Flim and Flam, they’re kind of cowards.”
“Then let’s go.”
Derpy went visible, disconcerting Albert for a moment, but he recovered and used the bump of adrenelin to speed his way through until they came to the cart.
“You two!” shouted Derpy. “What are you doing here?”
Flim and Flam did react as Karyn hoped they would, and froze up at being discovered. “So much for indetectibility,” said Flim.
“I’m surprised you even know how to work a crafted spell. Seems like too much work for you.”
Flam sidled up to her and tried to put a hoof around her neck, but Derpy slid away. “What do you say that we all just walk away...or fly away, and pretend that nopony saw anypony. We can make it worth your while. How does a thousand bits sound?”
“Forget it!”
“Oh, don’t worry. We can toss in a few cents for your friends here.”
Now Flim joined him. “I think they call them cents here too.”
“If you don’t tell us what’s going on right now, you can tell it to Princess Luna, because that’s who we’ll be heading to next.”
Albert looked at Derpy confused, not knowing who Princess Luna was, but the two brothers didn’t notice. “All right!” said Flim. “We got the word about ponies crossing over between the worlds, and we saw the opportunity for a little arbitrage.”
“Use words I know!”
Karyn was relieved to have some of the tension broken. “It’s a real word, Derpy. It means that they want to find things here that they can sell in Equestria and vice versa.”
“So, just another get-rich-quick scheme. What was it that you wanted to take?”
“Oh, just anything we could find,” said Flam.
Now Karyn rolled her eyes. “Derpy, let’s go. Princess Luna can do the rest of the questioning.”
“OK! We want to pipe that...what do you call it, brother?”
“Electricity,” Flim replied.
“Right, we want to bring that to Equestria so that ponies could run their own devices.”
Both Karyn and Albert came to the conclusion at the same time, and it was Albert who got it out first. “You two are responsible for the blackout!”
“Yeah, sorry, we took a little too much at once.”
“So, you’re just stealing it? That’s not making money, that’s...well, it’s stealing!”
Flim and Flam looked at each other. “What do you mean?” said Flim. “There’s plenty of it around. Look at all the lights of the cities and towns.”
Karyn shook her head. “Wow, you guys really don’t know, do you? All of that, every volt and ampere of it, has to be generated, often in ways that are damaging to the environment, always at high expense. It’s not magic, you know.”
To that, they had no answer, but Albert did. “I find it difficult to believe that you could be that ignorant of exactly what you were taking. And I think that you fit the profile”
“The profile of a thief?” asked Derpy.
“No, the profile of a patsy. I think there’s someone else behind this.”
Karyn again indicated her displeasure with the situation. “I think you’re overcomplicating it. You don’t know ponies.”
“But I do know the mentality of con men, cheats, and thieves. Electricity is worth something, but a con man sells something that’s worthless. So someone, with the proper attitude of a thief has to be pulling the strings.”
Derpy shook her hoof at the brothers. “How about it?”
Flim and Flam were visibly sweating. Flam broke first. “We don’t know who he is.”
Derpy opened her bag and went for her spell. The brothers knew what that meant.
“I promise! We only heard his voice.”
“Then how were you supposed to work it?”
“We had a meeting tonight set for an hour from now.”
Still keeping an eye on them, Karyn went over and whispered something to Derpy. “That could work.” Derpy scanned all around her thinking of details. “First off, the spare bag. Give it back.”
Dejected, Flim floated the bag out of the cart and tossed it to Derpy. After checking that all the spells were present, she turned to Albert. “Can you keep an eye on them? Please?”
“For how long?”
“Well, if all goes right, about ten seconds.”
Albert rolled his eyes as he continued to be out of his depth. Karyn got on Derpy and flashed to Equestria.
Night had fallen completely over Ponyville. Counting on Flam’s estimate of an hour until the meeting being on the low side, they moved quickly. They had a plan, but wanted to make sure they had help.
“That’s one of the things that I always see people doing wrong in fiction,” said Karyn as they ran, “they rush into things without telling anyone.”
“Are we really going to get Princess Luna?”
“No, but Twilight’s here. I hope she’s up. If not, we’ll just have to wake her and let Spike be mad. We can’t have pony criminals running over Earth.”
Twilight was awake, taking late notes with Owlowiscious, but they still woke Spike. After bringing her up to speed, Twilight asked, “So what exactly is your plan?”
“Well, we want to keep the appointment to find out who’s behind it all,” said Derpy. “Karyn?”
She focused, and green light filled the room. When it subsided, there was Karyn disguised as Flim. “It doesn’t have to be long,” she said, not liking the smoothness of the voice, “just enough to find out who the meeting is with, if indeed there is somepony.”
“All right. I approve it. But be careful. It could be someone really villainous, like Sunset Shimmer or Queen Chrysalis. Cadance trusts her, but...”
Derpy grinned. “I’m thinking it’s just some greedy pony like Filthy Rich. But we’ll find out.”
They moved out and arrived back near the alley where they found the cart. Derpy went to hide in the shadows while Karyn waited. It was a dull and boring hour for Karyn, who couldn’t even sit down, there being no place to do so. But at last a figure entered the alley, checking around to see if he had been followed.
“What’s the word? Did you get the feed?”
“Yeah, we got it,” Karyn said, hoping to not have to play the part too long. “We could be found out, though.”
“By humans? From what I’ve heard they’re not too bright.”
That was enough for Karyn. She dropped the disguise and said, “We’re not, huh? Bright enough to fool you!”
The other pony bolted for the alley, but Derpy got in the way and spread her wings to deny any exit.
“Derpy?!” the pony cried out, in surprise and confusion. He turned to look back at Karyn, and a moonbeam struck him. Karyn needed a moment to recognize him. For Derpy it was instant.
“Rocky Top? Really?”
For indeed it was Derpy’s prodigal ex-husband, and Dinky’s father. Karyn had thought him rather a cowardly figure, and she echoed Derpy’s sentiment. “You were the one who planned to steal our power?”
It was, perhaps the wrong choice of phrase, because it made Rocky laugh, and that made Derpy want to hit him. But before she could, she made a connection. “I bet it was you who took the bag from Dinky in Canterlot! You really are a thief!”
“No, I—“
“Save it. We’re going to tell Princess Twilight that it was you behind it all, then we’re going to send Flim and Flam back and she can deal with all three of you.”
They escorted him back to the library, Rocky too cowed—or too cowardly—to disobey. Once there, they showed him to Twilight.
“I see. Now that we know who it is, we actually have time to discuss everything. Tell me exactly what happened, from when you first noticed something out of the ordinary. If what you told me is correct, time on Earth is still frozen, so please make your account as detailed as possible.”
They told the story, going back and forth between Karyn and Derpy as each remembered details the other forgot. Twilight made notes with a quill, nodding her head as she went along. She asked many questions, and both Karyn and Derpy would have preferred that she held them until they were all done. But since it was she that they were going to for official justice, they let her have her way. She asked about the nature of electricity, and about exactly how much it cost, and how it was generated, and if they thought it could be used in Equestria.
For his part, Rocky stood there, defiant, volunteering nothing. Twilight didn’t ask him any questions, and he seemed not to care about the entire proceeding. Derpy was worried about the general situation, but part of her felt that if he got some comeuppance, it would be well-deserved.
“All right,” Twilight said at last, “I think you had better go and get the Flim Flam brothers. I’ve got to think long and hard about how exactly to deal with this.”
They left and returned to Earth. Albert was still amazed at how they could speak of hours worth of time passing without him knowing. But they had no time to put up with his discomfort, as Derpy made each of the brothers put on the spell and return. Finally, all was sorted and only Derpy remained as the Equestrian on Earth.
“So what are we going to do with the cart?” Albert asked.
“Good question.” Karyn looked around each side. “Probably we’ll go through and find anything that’s too overtly magical and get rid of it, then leave it here.”
“And who turned out to be the ringleader?”
“Derpy’s ex, believe it or not. I’ve met him before and he’s kind of a jerk, but I didn’t think he’d go this far. He stole the bag from their daughter who lives in Canterlot.
“Hm.”
Derpy perked up her ears. “What?”
“Well, I think that’s a funny coincidence. The ex of the regular visitor happens to be behind it all, and the spare bag was with their daughter. For all we know, it could be a conspiracy.”
“How dare you...I mean...”
Karyn stepped between them and spread her arms. “That is really cold. Accusing her is bad enough, but her daughter, who you don’t even know, and who’s the most innocent little unicorn out there...you know, if you’re ever going to be good at what you do, you’ve got to learn to think first.”
Albert stuck his finger in her face, and got ready to argue, but then he stopped. “You’re right. I’m sorry.”
“Well...that’s a start. And thank you for all your help. We probably wouldn’t have found out it was Flim and Flam without you, certainly not that it was Rocky Top.”
“You’re welcome. I guess I’ll see you around campus.”
Karyn watched him turn to go. “If you do, you know it’s OK to say hi. You don’t always have to sneak around.”
“Maybe I will. Who knows, we might even be friends.”
“Let’s not push it too far.”
He laughed and left.
“Whew,” said Derpy. “Crazy day. I’m going to go back to Twilight to see how everything plays out. You want to come with? Or I can drop you off at the car.”
“No, I’ll join you. I’m kind of in the mood to see what’s going to happen to Rocky and to the Flim Flam brothers too. It’s probably none of my business, but I’ve been punished enough times in my life that I don’t mind seeing other people get it once in a while.”
They went back to Equestria, and had to retrace their steps one more time. When they got to the library, the lights were already dimmed. Karyn tapped on the door.
Twilight welcomed them in. “Ah, good. I’m glad that you came back tonight. Now I can take care of all of this business at once. Let’s begin with the contributions of your friend Albert.”
“He’s not my friend. In fact he’s one of our worst enemies.”
“And yet it wasn’t he, but an Equestrian who turned out to be the biggest threat to keeping our secret. That was unexpected. But in any case, I believe that Albert is also under sanction for what he did. I think it’s time that we lifted that. You can tell him the next time you see him that nopony will watch him anymore.”
Karyn gave a sly grin. “Maybe I won’t tell him.”
Twilight looked askance at Karyn. “Really?”
“He seems to be better off for it. Living cleanly and taking care of himself. But I’ll probably let him know eventually.”
“Good, I think that’ll be best for everyone.”
Derpy was eagerly bouncing up and down. “And what about the bad ponies?”
Twilight took a deep breath, and the look on her face was far from one of relish. “They’re my problem. Mine and the other princesses. They did wrong, but at the same time...this is very difficult.”
Now they could sense that there was something more intense here, and all thoughts of schadenfreude left Karyn and Derpy.
Twilight stood tall and faced them. “I’m sorry, but effective immediately, no more ponies can be guests on Earth.”
“What?!” Derpy gave a full-throated scream, not caring who knew at that time of night.
“Excepting you, of course. You may keep going to Earth each Sunday as you have been, but I’m going to have to ask for the other bag back.”
Forlorn, as though she had been stripped of a badge of office, Derpy unstrapped the saddlebag and held it out on the end of her hoof. When it floated away, it felt like Twilight took a part of her too.
“This isn’t fair,” said Karyn. “We didn’t do anything wrong, and neither did any of the ponies who wanted to come. Why do you have to punish everypony for three bad apples?”
Derpy interrupted. “They weren’t Apples. Big Macintosh and Applejack didn’t cause the problem.”
“It’s a figure of speech.”
“You’re right,” said Twilight. “It isn’t fair, but it is safe, and that’s what we’re going to do. It’s my decision and I’m taking the responsibility for it. Maybe, in time, under proper supervision, ponies will walk on Earth again. But not right now.”
There was nothing more they could say. With her head held down, Derpy plodded to the door, Karyn trailing behind.
Karyn snorted. “Come on. Let’s go home.”
“Yeah. I want to be on Earth now. It’ll make me feel better if I know that I can still go.”
Karyn mounted up, but she could tell that Derpy’s heart wasn’t in the flying as she reached the transition point, and seemed more happy to have her hooves on the ground to walk to Karyn’s apartment.
The light as Karyn turned it on seemed harsh and cold, stinging their eyes. Derpy went to collapse on the bed, but even that didn’t seem right.
“Why does this hurt so much?” she asked.
“Because it’s the first step backwards. All this time we’ve only gotten looser with the rules, never tighter. There’s been more magic on Earth, one way or another, but now we’re going to miss out on some. It’s like when you’re in class, and you have a good rapport with the teacher, and you can get away with anything, and then one day they just come in and say that they’ve gotten yelled at or something, and that they’ve got to enforce the rules now. So you hope that it’s just temporary, and they’re not really that hard, and that it can go back to the good times soon.”
“Well, let’s hope that that’s what happens here.”
“And it’s not all bad. Maybe we can go back to the times when it was just us and we had relaxing Sundays together, not worried about doing anything in particular. And too, I’ll be busy in school, so I won’t have to be distracted with anticipating somepony coming each week.”
Derpy tried to smile, but she couldn’t. “I hope everypony won’t be upset with me that they can’t go.”
“They won’t be. Whatever else, it isn’t our fault.”
“I know, but there are still times I dread facing other ponies. Can I stay here a little bit longer?”
Karyn held her hoof. “I was going to ask if you would.”