Chapter 2 – My Lips are Sealed
The cool morning air feels refreshing, its breeze moving across the travelers’ campsite. It coaxes one out of their slumber like an alarm clock. It chills your body and yet wakes you gently. But alas, that is not the luxury nature has given you.
You awoke to the sound of nothing.
Absolutely nothing, but then again, you covered your head with your pillow last night. To drown out that blasted harmonica that nearly sent you over the edge. But in the middle of the night, you decided against murder. You can’t really blame the pony. By the loud sobs you hear every time he pauses to take a breath [and take a full hard swig of his...cider?]. The pony most likely has lost something dear to him like a family member or something.
‘At least the sound of that harmonica woke me from that accursed nightmare!’ You think to yourself as you try to shut out that dream as much as you can.
Long story short, what happened in that dream has you on edge. Whatever you dreamt about, you will never be able to see cucumbers the same way again.
“Mental note: Never accept an offer from a nerdy mare who has cucumbers”
“What’s that about cucumbers?”
“Aaah!”
You have been startled, congratulations. Now is the time to act like a fool by flailing your hooves in the air. Then comes the part where you return to Equestria. Your realization of this causes you to figure out your current situation. You are now covered in your bedroll and currently seeking refuge under your cart. You are now a beaming example for colts and stallions everywhere.
Achievement unlocked: An Easy Wuss.
“Tha way Ah see it, them ponies here won’t be remembering what ya did back there” Big Mac says while hitching himself to his cart, chuckling as he remembered you hiding under the cart turned into an impromptu skit.
It drove most travelers around camp to give you some bits, like a street performer looking for some tips. In total you received 43 bits, not bad.
“I think I’d rather die right now. This amount of embarrassment can kill a guy- I mean pony.”
Whoops! Nearly let that slip. That was a lousy save, a yellow card for you.
“Hmm?”
And now that there is some light out, you can clearly see the load the red stallion is hauling.
“Never mind...S-so Big Mac, what have you got there?”
“This? This here is tha crop Ah'm about to deliver to Canterlot. They pay a mighty hefty fee for these here tart apples.” He finishes with a grunt as he takes his first step onto the road.
“Huh, that seems to be quite the haul there. Are you sure you don’t have a partner to help you with these deliveries?” you ask as you clean up your camping kit.
Seeing as everyone else has settled down from watching your antics, you decided that it would be best to do what everypony is doing.
“Nnope!” giving what you picked up as his trademark reply.
Sensing that he might have a reason, you press him for it. You take a position opposite from him before speaking.
“Why not?”
“Well, it’s a matter of principle really. Ah need the exercise and a break from all tha farm work back home.” he then points to cart.
“In any case, ah just like going around. Seeing new sights and meetin’ new ponies like yerself. It helps expand how y’look at tha world.”
‘Deep. Real deep.’
That simple statement has left you speechless. Such insight for somepony like that is rare. Well, such insight for anyone you know is rare. Big Mac, noticing you staring blankly into nowhere, takes his queue.
“Welp, it looks like ah best be going now, Spice. It was a pleasure meeting ya!” He offers his hoof and you gesture to reply.
“You too”
“Oh and if ya ever need somethin ta eat with apples, Trot on down to tha town square an’ look for an orange mare with a blonde mane an’ three apples as her cutie mark. Tell ‘er that Big Mac send his regards!”
You give him a nod. On the road, now hitched to your cart, you both faced your destinations, mirrored to the other. Hearing his hooves clop against the dirt, you set off on your way to Ponyville and he to Canterlot.
‘I’ve never met anyone so polite. Then again, most humans I know are douchebags. It’s a fact, so don’t go denying it. I never got an answer out of him, but at least he lives near the town.’ It is either your luck, or the will of some great deity that has lead you to meet this pony.
It has been 4 hours or so of travelling. So far, you’ve figured that you’ve covered the equivalent distance of half a day. You then decided to take a break and refer to the map you have. Feeling a wee bit peckish, you opted for lunch as well.
“Now, what would be a good spot?” you say to yourself as you put aside your cart.
Pulling out your map and your canteen, you scout around for a place to settle down.
“How about that glade over there, by the tree stump? Nah.”
“The edge of the road would be nice. Sure, under the sun again.”
“Well, how about the hill over there? Wait, why am I talking to myself?”
“No, you’re not. Yes you are. You sure? Positive. So, I am not taking to myself.”
”Well, you are now.” You hear yourself say in a feminine voice. But then you realize that it was not your own.
As you were clearly talking to yourself, your body went ahead toward the hill. Upon arriving you hadn’t noticed that the hill is already occupied. There sat a white Pegasus mare with a long icy blue mane and a sun with a sparkly water droplet for a cutie mark. She’s eating her lunch, by the looks of it.
“Uhh...Hi there.” Yellow card number 2.
She took a bite of her sandwich, chewing slowly and thoughtfully. She eyed you the whole time before swallowing, measuring you with her deep purple eyes.
“Are you Spice Tea, by any chance?”
“Yes, that would be me. And you are?”
She smiles. Then she stuffs what’s left of her sandwich into her mouth and stands up. After swallowing, she then does something completely unexpected. From behind a rock she pulls out a set of armor, donning it and tossing a salute in your direction.
“Princess Celestia and Princess Luna send their regards. My name is Morning Dew, from her majesties air courier division. I am here to deliver a parcel that her majesties forgot to give you the day before.”
“I see…” you nonchalantly reply.
Holding out your hoof, she pulls out the parcel from behind the tree.
“Uhm...what is this?”
You eye the parcel. It is a small cardboard box wrapped in twine, with a royal seal on the top. There also seems to be a letter attached to said parcel. You take it out and started reading the lovely cursive on it.
‘Dear Spice Tea,
I hope this finds you well. We are so terribly sorry for forgetting this crucial part of your transformation. Since you chose a unicorn as your base form, in this parcel is a crystal ball and an amulet. The ball is to unlock the magic of your unicorn half, whilst the amulet we have enchanted for another purpose. The amulet when worn will ask you if you want to change forms. Using the amulet will be self explanatory, as it will speak only to you. And as a little bonus I snuck ‘Alicorn’ as a choice as well. So that means you have 4 choices.
And if you ever get lonely, the crystal ball acts as a medium for communication. So if you ever want to talk, or just have this URGENT desire to have some heated verbal discussions, and when I say heated, I mean that since the ball also shows images, we could—’
“O-okay....” you say to yourself.
You then notice the letter cut from here. The rest of the letter seems to have been written by another hoof, a refined, yet constrained cursive, but elegant nonetheless. You continued reading the bizarre letter.
‘-Yes, well if you do wish to communicate with either of us, I have placed a note by the crystal ball. Written on it are the times that we are respectively available. Do note that there is an inscription on the ball per se. When cast will activate the ball and you can speak as you please. Do note proper decorum when using this around others but in any personal space you may speak freely.
In any event, I hope this note and parcel reaches you before you arrive at Ponyville.
The Royal Princesses Celestia and Luna’
‘Immortality gets one to do crazy things. Well, at least these will help.’
With that, you store your letter and parcel in your cart. But while you were reading, Morning Dew decided to go investigate the contents of your cart. She rummaged on with care and consideration, as it was your belongings, not hers. She was about to end her search, till she found a familiar locket.
“Lookie here, a locket! I wonder who the lucky mare is?” she says with a curious glee as she wiggled her eyebrows towards you. That is, until she opened it.
“Oh my...I mean...I’ve heard of some stallions but...both of them?!...I-I’m sorry sir!” she panics, with a mad blush apparent on her white coat. She stares at you with wide eyes.
“D-Don’t worry sir, your secret is safe with me. I do hope the lineage will continue....” she ends with a salute and carefully replaces it back into your cart.
“N-NO! I-I mean, it is not what it looks like. Please, you’ve got it all wrong...whatever that you think I did!”
“It is alright, sir. You have taken the burden of being the royal plaything. My lips are sealed” She said with her eyes closed, but the blush still there.
“The what now?!”
She then opens her eyes and watches you intently. It seems that she jumped onto a conclusion. But then again, that did not put you in ease. For a member of the guard hearing about such rumors, that means there might be some reason to be paranoid, after all they ARE goddesses.
“I’m sorry...it is just that many of the guard have requested relocation. Some even handed their resignation.”
“It’s alright I suppose. I mean working with two immortal beings, would have these certain rumors flying around, right?” you jokingly say, keeping the conversation light.
“I recently heard that...several mares from the Night guard disappearing right after the Royal court switch over...they appeared in the morning covered in sweat.” She grimaces.
“I’m sure that it’s not that bad-“
“Some of her highness’ Luna’s personal hoofmaidens have been found tied to a bed, in the guest wing of the palace, the morning after...”
“Really, I think-“
“...Then there were the cucumbers... poor lad, he was recently promoted...he couldn’t sit for a week...”
“...uhhh”
“... I’m sure that it’s nothing. Sorry to give you discomfort of any sort.” She says, her hoof pawing at the dirt, her head slightly turned down.
Quick! Do something! A stallion would not let any mare feel bad. Just do anything, as long as it’s not overly embarrassing. You have decided.
You hug her.
This action has immediate results, in a good way at least. Morning Dew seems to have calmed down. Her breathing became shallow and she seems to have stopped fidgeting. But now her face resembles that of a tomato. Alas the hug has prevented you from noticing this.
“There....you feeling okay?”
“...Y-Yes! I-I’m sorry but it s-seems I need to go....duty calls” she says with a stutter as she clumsily escapes from your hug. You take this as your cue and release her.
“...”
She stares at you silently
“It seems I got a little carried away...”
“...”
‘I think I broke her’ found suspicion of mentally breaking the mare, maybe.
“...I heard from her majesties that you are heading towards Ponyville. I-If by any chance you need some assistance...I mean I live there and...and I....aahhhh.” And there you have it, ladies and gentlecolts. Spice Tea has broken a mare.
Not really. The flustered white pegasi immediately took to the air, only returning to say something.
“You’re cute!”
The she left. Leaving you to think what has went on since yesterday. This led you to believe that some higher power is indeed pulling the strings. Like one of those authors who write in the 2nd person. Guiding you, into scenarios that test your sanity and integrity-
“Don’t be ridiculous. That would never happen to me. But then again, I ended up in Equestria”
You say to yourself, staring up at the direction where Morning Dew flew off to. You shrug it off as you decided that what is done is done. You now take this moment to enjoy your respite from all these hijinks. Laying your lunch and the map you have in front of you.
‘Half a day’s journey more and I’m still not there yet....Should I say it?’ you sigh. “What’s the worst that could happen?”
[Author's Note: Nothing much to say, but my proofreader did [Inkdrop] : Dat Ending]