Chapter 14: Harmony’s
Star Swirl came to fetch me, mid-play with the three children.
“Tag!” I cried, darting away from the squealing form of Luna. Discord ran away merrily as Luna gave chase to the fast-moving draconequus. Tempora lay in the shade of a tree, content to overwatch her rambunctious foals.
With a flash, I found myself face-to-face with one of the most powerful unicorns of the age, well at least according to Tempora. I rapidly blinked away the teleportation flash.
“By all that is right and good, will you stop doing that?!” I muttered angrily, rubbing at my hurt ocular orbs.
Star Swirl, swept away my pain with a flick of his tail.
“No time. Experiment now, wallowing in pain and self-pity later," he babbled, grabbing my arm in his mouth painfully.
The next thing I knew, I was on the floor, extremely nauseated. I couldn’t even bring myself to berate the crazy, out-of-this-world unicorn.
“I. Will. Rend. You.” I threatened, then dry-heaved.
“Just give me a second to catch my breath," Star Swirl wheezed. “And I will respond to your threat in due time.”
Tempora flashed into the chamber a moment later, eyeing Star Swirl stonily as the monarch had ever. I would have found the situation more funny if I didn’t feel like regurgitating breakfast. I don’t like regurgitating food. It’s a waste.
I was pleased to see that Tempora had brought in Celestia, Luna and even Discord upon her back. They looked a little woozy, but were a lot less worse than me.
“Star Swirl, what have I told you about teleporting?”
Star Swirl caught his breath and gave the Queen a lop-sided smile.
“Not to do it consecutively because it makes you tired?”
A frown was plastered on her muzzle.
“Not to carry a load greater than one’s ability to handle?”
Her frown deepened.
“Not to bring a load without permission from the owner?”
Tempora’s horn sparked. Once.
“Okay, okay, ask before you teleport somepony. Yeesh.”
I got to my feet slowly, placing a hand over my stomach. I didn’t know if that was helping with the nausea but it certainly made me feel like I was doing something.
Tempora gave me a thorough once over, then turned her attention back to the meddling mage.
“Hmm, Star Swirl you’re on very thin ice here if I ever-“ she began, but was rudely cut-off by the recalcitrant unicorn.
“-Catch you again using magic like that I’ll not be so forgiving, blah, blah," Star Swirl replied dismissively, moving around his lab. He rummaged around a cupboard extricating various tomes and miscellaneous items as Tempora sighed in exasperation and turned back to me.
“Second-hoof teleportation tends to affect creatures with higher-order functioning and bigger body masses with nausea," Tempora explained she was studiously ignoring the eccentric unicorn as he darted in between us to fetch something round and glassy.
I was surprised at the technical-sounding jargon that Tempora was using with regards to magic. Then again, I wouldn’t think you could bend space and time so readily if there wasn’t an intrinsic and fundamental understanding of both nature and the magic itself. Probably. I wasn’t an expert.
“We are modifying the spell-forms to assist with the discomfort but I’m confident that eventually, travelling second-hoof will have no ill side-effects," Tempora ended, giving a satisfied nod of her head. I shook my head, it almost sounded like a report from a scientist.
“That’s really detailed," I admitted, impressed.
Tempora cocked her head, as if suddenly sensing an internal alarm. Her royal armour draped itself over her shoulders. I sagged a bit. I was beginning to loathe that persona of Tempora.
“Ah, it is nearing 3 o’clock and that is as much time as I can spare for the week, let alone today. I have had such a pleasant experience with you, Harmony. Perhaps we could see each other again?”
I recovered, smiling and nodding. Celestia and Luna waved a hoof at me, bidding me farewell from atop of Tempora’s back. Discord clambered off Tempora and made his way to me. Tempora flashed away, taking Luna and Celestia with her. I managed to look away this time so I wasn’t going to end up with a permanent blindness. I hope. You could never tell with other universes and their crazy laws of nature.
“Okay-“ I began but my voice was lost, as I studied the immensely complicated setup that Star Swirl had prepared. There were rubber tubes and hoses connecting flasks, baubles and extraneous equipment I could only hazard a guess at were. An intricate diagram littered a chalk board that had been drawn up somehow with litters of parchment and paper on the ground in piles around the strange contraption. What was disturbing was that various protruding nozzles and wires were all pointing to a centre.
A centre that Star Swirl was gesturing me to occupy.
I hesitantly stepped forward, only to feel a tug on my leg.
Discord’s expression had an intense look of distrust. I knelt down and patted him on the mane.
“Don’t worry, buddy. I’ll be okay," I reassured him, gently pulling his claw and paw away from my trouser leg.
Star Swirl had his head tilted curiously.
“Strange, I wonder if-"
“No," I growled immediately.
“I didn’t even finis-"
“No," I interrupted again.
Star Swirl sighed.
“Oh all right," he grumbled, moving to reposition some equipment. “Just stand there in the centre of the circle and we’ll be able to get a reading on you.”
His horn glowed as wires around the room lit up in some unknown sequence. I watched carefully as the glowing of the wires flowed into various flasks and gems, causing them to glow ominously from deep crimson red to lilac and sky-blue.
A low hum filled the room as the tips of the wires close to me gave off a soft glow. I cringed as various knick knacks and things that looked suspiciously like old valves started the glow sympathetically brighter with the increasing frequency of the hum.
I stood there feeling increasingly antsy as the hum turned to a whine.
“Is it supposed to do that?” I called out as Star Swirl leapt from one part of the complex contraption to the other.
“Can’t talk, wow, busy, ooh, just stand still!” he answered me unhelpfully.
I crossed my arms but kept my peace, trusting Tempora’s words that this was one of the best unicorns of this age.
The fever-pitch whine, which was starting to make me uncomfortable, cut off abruptly.
“Amazing!” Star Swirl commented, stepping carefully past his equipment to appraise me.
I tilted my head.
“Amazing, how?”
“You’re completely normal!” he exclaimed and I let loose a sigh of relief. Normal. Good.
“That’s great, normal is good," I grinned, relaxing.
Star Swirl shook his head as he circled around me like a shark.
“Don’t know about good. Just know that it’s interesting," he muttered as he suddenly came to a stop. He cocked his head and explosively leapt to the side, crashing through a stack of scrolls and throwing them about. It was a wonder he got anything done around here with all his literary materials strewn about like that.
He was reading the scroll intensely as I came up behind him.
“Anything I should know about?” I asked tentatively, I didn’t like where this is going.
Star Swirl only grunted back while he scanned the document. I felt like that was probably all I was going to get out of him until he was ready to explain everything to me.
I waddled over to Discord and started playing a modified version of shoot, shield, reload. Discord was an expert reader and I found myself consistently beaten as he got familiar with the game.
Clap. Clap.
“Bang!” I yelled.
“Shield!” he shot back.
Dang, he had a shield up. Next one.
Clap. Clap.
“Reload!” I shouted as Discord yelled “Bang!”
I clutched my heart, keeling over in mock death.
“Oh!” I yelled. “You got me!”
Discord grinned cheekily doing a victory dance. I sighed, tasting the ashes of defeat against a foal with laser-precision observation.
Star Swirl finally coughed to get my attention.
I decided to let his rudeness slide, he was just enthusiastic, like my Dad. I decided to play an old joke from between my Dad and me, on an impulse.
“Do you need a Doctor?” I asked blithely, smirking. “My Dad’s a Doctor.”
Star Swirl’s face split into a grin.
“Not that kind of Doctor," he shot back, laughing. I joined in.
“Ah so you’ve met my father," I commented as Star Swirl snorted.
“Another soul who is just as annoying as I am, I love him like a brother," Star Swirl replied, chuckling.
Star Swirl led me to a table and I gave him a knowing look as we switched roles as hosts. Discord sat in my lap and curled up contentedly, comfortable taking a small nap in what would probably be a long conversation.
“So, when I mentioned that you were normal, I meant normal for a unicorn’s level of magic," Star Swirl finally explained, after bustling around for a cup buried under some books. He continued as I subsided, absorbing that piece of information.
“You see, ponies all have an inherent amount of magic and they are able to access it and shape it to their will. Over time, even beings without magic initially, such as some native fauna in other lands, will eventually absorb magic quite readily as soon as one trots into Equestria.”
I opened my mouth to reply but he waggled a hoof to stem my question.
“But that takes a long time, generations even! Your father had been tested, zero magical fidelity! Astounding!”
He trotted over, stroking a hoof along my spine.
“I wonder how it sticks," he mused out loud, looking at me as a someone does to an interesting insect specimen.
I shrugged away from his ministrations and glared at him. Ooh, that was a weird feeling. Ever had someone trace a finger down your spine? Yeah. Like that.
“So, what’s caused my sudden absorption of magic?” I asked, looking at Star Swirl from the corner of my eye.
Star Swirl gave me an inane grin.
“I have absolutely no idea! Isn’t that great?!” he shouted, excitedly, bounding around the room. I groaned. Yep. He’s like an equine version of my Dad.
Better do my job.
“Well since this is my body and I’m quite fond of it, I should probably learn more about this. Would you mind if I stick around and learn a few things? I need to learn some magic if I’m going to be staying here-“
Suddenly I paused. I realised what I just said. Did I just accept that I was going to be staying here forever? I churned the thought around in my head and weighed the options.
I had responsibilities here, with every passing day Discord was getting settled in and I would need to make a choice on whether I should rapidly adapt to Equestria or plan for a return to Earth. On Earth, I had friends, a few relatives that were close but not familiar. On Earth there was a chance that Discord could finally be accepted without the underlying prejudices here on Equestria.
I sucked a lip through my teeth in thought.
No. Yes. No. Yes. Ugh!
My mother used to say: ‘If in doubt, go with the flow.’
Oh, shoot, let’s just go for it.
Star Swirl called out to me as I gently cradled Discord in my arms and headed towards the door.
“Hey wait!” he yelled back at me, scrabbling around the table, abandoning the tea he was brewing for us.
“Sorry, got to talk to my father and quite possibly my step-mother," I replied, nudging open the door. A gust of wind blew in my face and I gently and very carefully shut the door with my foot.
Star Swirl skidding to a stop, scuffing a hoof on the floor. He looked just like a child who had been caught stealing a cookie from the cookie jar.
“Star Swirl," I said mildly. “Why are we more than ten storeys in the air?”
Star Swirl chuckled nervously.
“For the killer view?”