Tog Lalaith Ar Dagnir Mokaarwa (Bring laughter and slayer hate-possessor)
Dan's Comments
DISCLAIMER: My Little Pony is the property of Hasbro, Inc., Star Wars and the Star Wars Universe are the property of Disney and 20th Century Fox, the Rings of Power and characters of Lord of The Rings belong to the Tolkien Estate.
Wendy avoided yet another pony 'wandering' through the library. They weren't doing anything against the rules, but she recognized schoolyard bully tactics when she saw them. They'd tried to box her in twice and 'just ask some questions'. She'd pulled out a pencil and advanced. After she had ordered herself not to feel fear or remorse. They had done what bullies always did, rushed off and accused their victim of starting something.
After a couple weeks of ponies turning her refuge into a house of horrors, she waited outside the Equestrian Embassy. She'd briefly considered simply burning the place to the ground.
That would give them what they want, she thought, I'm glad I could talk to grampa, this is better. Just put their actions at the library in proper context.
Narya gave her massive 'fire' power. It also gave her excellent fine control. The message she burnt into the wall of the embassy didn't set the place on fire, but they'd take a long time to erase it. Now that they have their answer, I'll go home, I mean my room, and wait.
She laughed at the effect this would have and decided that it would be fun. I can always escalate to some of Graham's stupid pony saying later, she thought.
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"Have you seen this?!" Granny nearly threw down the paper in front of Wendy. Wendy never remembered seeing Granny so angry.
"No," Wendy said softly, forcing Granny to either calm down, or redirect her anger.
"I'm sorry, but it is so," Granny said through clenched teeth, then she growled and blew steam out of her nose.
Wendy looked at the paper, and read. " 'Stupid minotaurs, if you think you have the right to read, you can kiss my sexy flank, Celestia'." Celestia's profile with a grin stood beside the words burnt into the side of the building.
"That's why all those ponies have been in here. Harassing our clients. Harassing the staff. How DARE they?!"
"What are you going to do?" Wendy asked, "You can't simply deny ponies the right to come in here, then you'd be as bad as they are."
It was the same, idiot nonsense she'd heard on endless television shows and from particularly stupid adults. Grampa explained the difference is, when I've beaten you, I'll stop, you'll go after someone else.
She watched the librarian fume, but she was also struck by the problem.
"We'll figure something else out," Granny said, "But we're not going to tolerate the harassment anymore. If we have to call the police, we will."
"I think the police are going to be busy," Wendy said, "If the crowd around the embassy is any indication."
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Celestia threw down the paper, and briefly considered burning it to ashes. "This is not to be reported or even mentioned around Princess Luna, is that understood?" Celestia asked Shining Armor and the members of the palace servants' and guards' leadership.
All nodded their agreement, as horrified by the implications as Celestia was.
"Thank you, Captain Armor will you stay?" she asked, and the others filed out. She placed the broadsheet on the table in her 'day room', smoothed it out and stared with hatred at the words.
'With my Sister back, I can finally civilize you barbarians' had appeared overnight emblazoned across the walls of the embassy. This second message had been unsigned, every minotaur in Labyrinthopolis had instantly assumed it was Princess Celestia's stated word.
The diplomatic pressure from every nation was mounting, except, worryingly, Minotaura. They had accepted explanations without comment, had printed the Equestrian retractions and defense in their papers without any censorship or manipulation. They had not commented on the truth or falsehood of any allegation. 'No comment' seemed to be their new watch word. Which had fueled the anti-Equestria hysteria.
Then, they had started putting up recruitment posters for the Minotauran military. No anti-Equestrian rhetoric or images, just the Minotaur king looking sad but resolute, and the message, 'In trying times, your country needs you'.
"At their current rate, they'll have tripled the size of their military in six months," Armor said, "Although with the cordon they've thrown around the embassy and the consulates, they may need those troops just to keep order."
"How was it done?" Celestia asked. She'd felt the sharp pulse, but it was infinitesimal, until the morning brought the messages to light.
"By no magic anyone in the embassy could feel," Armor said, "It became apparent to them, when it became apparent to the people in the streets."
Celestia frowned at that. It was too subtle to be the cult, and with the rash of pony crazies, the minotaurs were already primed to think negatively of ponies. Her 'investigations' had played right into her enemy's hooves/hands. "How did it happen, do they know?" Celestia asked, "They found the exact weak point and struck it. We went from learning all we could about them, to being totally on the defensive."
"I don't know highness. But we have an additional resource, one that could slip in and do our surveillance without attracting anti-pony attention," Armor said.
Celestia nodded. "Have someone brief Darth Bates and ask him to head to Labyrinthopolis."
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Darth Bates had performed his revenge, I think and avoid cackling as I walk the streets of the minotaur capital, And the idiots who'd been harassing minotaurs had their real actions revealed to the Diarchs. I'd also discretely, and discreetly, sent a message to Shining Armor that Special Forces also need go to charm school. The automatic assumption that they were so tough that where they rested their hooves was Equestrian soil by fiat didn't work on more subtle missions.
I don't like leaving Equestria, I think, there had been subtle tremors in the Force that had been growing. Either there is going to be an explosion, or the tremors will shake the place to pieces slowly. I want to be there to help when they need it.
The streets of Labyrinthopolis are unusual in one respect, that vastly differs from what I'd been told to expect. Running into a minotaur on the street would generally require an apology, and surviving a punch. That rule seems to have changed.
Second, nearly every single person: minotaur, griffon, or other, old, young, and in-between, seems to have their nose or equivalent stuffed in a book, and possession of such seems carte blanche immunity to being challenged. And being run into despite your best effects, is instantly forgiven with 'I'm very sorry, I was looking for a book store.'
About the most aggressive response is one buck picks me up and set me down facing one, and growling a warning about watching where I was going. Then stuck his nose back in his book and starts marching off. The bookstore is doing a land-office business, and its windows have posters of the minotaur king pointing at the passers by, the legend read 'Read, because you can.' Not 'while you can' but 'because you can'. The official buildings have that, along with the posters of the king 'In trying times, your country needs you'. There are minotaurs in uniform everywhere, many reading military manuals.
Sparkle made a potion that converted everyone dosed with it into her, except it didn't change their gender or species. Diabolical! I'll have to compliment her. The Equestrian embassy is cordoned by a battalion of minotaur soldiers. Including at least two precision drill teams. While the soldiers may look like tourist traps, they watch everything, and they aren't about to let trouble happen on their watch.
The griffon embassy is very different, almost festive. They have great banners 'Read the History and Literature of your staunchest allies', and similar missives. They have two kiosks set up, one has a flag waving above the besieging crowd 'Read', the other doing a slower, more civilized business has a flag that says simply 'Buy'. Presumably, 'Read' is giving away cheaper, or smaller versions of what 'Buy' is selling.
"What do you recommend?" I ask. I am on an expense account, and I need to buy Purple an 'I'm still alive' present.
"The Omnibus Edition of the Plays and Sonnets of Shake Spear, The Complete Poetry and Essays of Bludyard Crip'-Wing, and The History of the Griffon People by Wing-Storm Chirp Hill," the griffon says. Each offered volume would have gagged a hydra. You could have torn any into thirds or quarters and still have sufficient mass to block those massive throats.
"I'll take the leather bound set for the library at home, and the hardback for walking around reading," I say.
The first sour note comes as the griffon looks at the Equestrian bits. "You might want to go inside and get those changed."
"I understood that bits were accepted everywhere." I know for a fact that minotaur and griffon coinage exactly duplicated Equestrian bits in weight and purity, so they would be interchangeable.
"That isn't perfectly true anymore," the griffon says.
I realize that the griffon and minotaur leaders are both taking advantage of the hysteria, and doing their best to quell it. The eager, patriotic hotheads are being welcomed into the military in droves, to deal with the self-interested hotheads, and to form a reserve if a natural disaster strikes. They also are making the otherwise innocuous act of reading a show of defiance against the Equestrians. It's a well-thought out and wholly civilized response to the provocation. I heartily approve. They are behaving in an infinitely more adult way than the Equestrian rulers, especially when they found out what had happened.
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It's unusual to watch the very face of serenity have a grand mal freak out. It's also funny as hell.
"It defeated Nightmare Moon. I felt it! All that dark energy," Celestial ranted, yes ranted. Disheveled mane, wild eyes, pacing putting everything in her path in jeopardy, the whole package, proving once again that Twilight can't do anything that Celestial can't do much better.
"Funny how it created a SUN with all that 'dark' energy," I commented, having escaped death (and the party afterward which would have been worse) by careful use of my special powers.
Celestia paused, letting that little fact fall into the abyss of her paranoia.
"That it didn't harm Nightmare as much as scare the pronk out of her helps," I added, not that it dissuaded Celestia's increasing hysteria.
"What will it do next, turn on Equestria? Reclaim my sister? Enslave the Minotaur lands? Enslave the griffons?" she asked as she paced and gesticulated with wings and tail.
Time to put a stop to this, I thought as she stepped in her way and let her run into my seeming.
"Oh, pardon -"
"You know," I said, tapping my chin, "I think you like the idea."
"What?" she asked, not confused but shocked.
"Well, big, deep, dark monster, this one so powerful it gently flicked Nightmare away from its chosen territory, and it talked first. So you can just imagine, groveling before it, offer your crown, your life, your body that it leaves your ponies alone. I think that it appeals to your martyr complex. Getting chained up and terrified of what it will do to you, but knowing your ponies are safe."
"That's DISGUSTING!" Celestia shouted.
I just pointed to her completely poofed out wings. "It's your fantasy not mine."
She looked appropriately horrified and began preening down her wings.
"That is not a fantasy of mine!" she exclaimed.
"No shame in thinking about what you can never have," I told her, "After all, it might be nice not having to worry about everything for a while. 'Stone walls do not a prison make, nor iron bars a cage'. Everyone assumes that means you can't be imprisoned by someone locking you up. It also means you don't have to have the trappings of a prison, for some place to be a prison. Even a throne room can feel a prison, if you can never escape it."
She frowned, but seemed to have left her madness behind.
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I accept the books from the griffon, and get past the embassy guard with the explanation I need to exchange currency. A few minutes later and 5% slimmer in funds, I exit with all minotaur and griffon currency. The Grand Library, which seems to be the nexus of all activity is my next stop.
It has the 'Read, because you can' banners, and also is doing a land office business, although they seem to be limiting people to taking out one book at a time.
I approach one of the guards standing tall at the entrance. He gives me a once over and seems to accept I'm not a pony harasser.
"I beg you pardon, but I purchased a set of books from the embassy, and I don't want to cause trouble on the way out."
The guard nods. "We've been briefed on the griffon books. Just show your pack on the way out."
"Thank you." I head inside.
The inside is almost as chaotic. The people are reading as if the embassy message were accurate and reading were to be going out of style. I open my senses and walk the halls, trying to find something, anything of this anomaly. Since it seemed focused on the library, it logically would have a focus here. The event that stuns me is walking by an alcove, seeing a girl in there who wouldn't draw a stare on Alderaan or a hundred other worlds, but my Force senses tell me she isn't there.
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Darth Bates watched the girl, if girl she was, study the texts, make notes on her papers, and be completely 'not there' as far as the Force was concerned.
Wendy had giggled about the sudden increase in the library's 'business' and the minotaurs' defiance of what was already being called 'the Equestrian Mandate'. In smiley rainbow land, they aren't going to start a war, she thought and simply continued on her studies.
Darth Bates hadn't detected any more active defenses, she seemed to be using only invisibility to protect herself. Very clever, or very foolish, he thought, We shall see.
She looked up at him and her hands tightened to fists. He gave her a slight bow but stood his ground.
"Please to make your acquaintance," he said, "My name is Darth Bates."
She tensed at 'Darth' rather than reacting to the entire name.
So she knows something about the Sith, this could be bad, or good, he thought.
She watched him closely, but her grip on the invisible rings, and an array of battle spells didn't relax an iota.
"May I," he indicated the chair nearest him, farthest from her.
"If I say no?" she replied.
"Then I leave," he replied and waited.
She nodded.
"Since you already reacted to 'Darth', you know the Sith and some of their more flamboyant and stupid practitioners," he said hoping that the creature who had likely sent Nightmare Moon packing would listen to reason. "I am more of a hybrid. I see the passion of the Dark Side and the detachment of the Light Side as complements not opposites."
She was listening, but ready for a trick. He moved on, realizing that openness would be the best course.
"Outside is a perfect example of my beliefs. Great passions, inflamed to right wrongs, but the ordinary people have channeled it into a quiet defiance. And a peaceful challenge to Equestria."
She nodded, but her suspicions were not reduced. "Then why are you sitting here chatting? Why not do something rash for the greater glory of Equestria?"
He ignored the childish taunt. "Because Equestria's greatest glory is its tolerance."
She snorted with laughter at that.
"I never said it was common," he replied. "Now let me tell you something about you."
She tensed but held her fire.
"Your defense is complete invisibility to scans. But because you remain visible, you are a sore thumb to anyone who actually comes and looks. Your two alternatives are arguably worse. Let out a low level signal, but that would give you away by letting you be tracked by the very steadiness of your signal. Or, randomly vary your signal over a low-energy band. You'd appear like everyone else, but that would take considerable concentration. So neither are better."
She'd relaxed slightly, but she still held her suite of attacks ready.
"The other thing is you're human, or appear to be. That makes you a rare creature here. Third, I don't think the Equestrians realize what an overwhelming force drove off Nightmare Moon. Not imprisoned, not battered into insensibility, drove off. The creature that embodied all ponies fears fled in alarm. What manner of creature could do that?"
She watched him and knew he was lulling her into a relaxed state, but she dragged herself mentally back to alert. "You can ask any of the hundreds of thousands of witnesses."
"Yes, but they can't tell me if the creature is a threat to Equestria, or merely a guardian of the Minotaur territories," he said, watching her reaction and getting very little, "The difference I think you can guess is immense."
"Not my greatest concern," she said.
Unless someone makes it mine, she thought.
"So the question becomes, 'what do you want?'" he said.
"I want to go home," she replied, her tension was there, but it was no longer concerned but a coiled spring ready to strike. "But since we're trading magic tricks, everything the ponies wove and sealed, is coming undone. Nightmare Moon, Discord, Sombra, Tirek. And other forces have set their sights on Equestria. The Changelings see it as a fat, happy land ready for their tender care. Thousands of bright, shiny morsels on legs. They aren't wrong."
A kindred spirit, he thought, Give everyone a sharp wake up call, and get them prepared for her, and thus be more ready to face their real enemies. Quite the scheme.
She kept expecting him to whip out his light saber and strike. At the first hiss, she'd go invisible and blast him with everything she had. He might deflect it all, but I should be able to slip away, she thought, This is not the fight I want.
"And what is your purpose?" he asked, "To preserve just your people?"
"I couldn't care less about the group that has the three equine Mary Sues, the Rainbow Friendship Cannon and faith that hard work and good preparation be damned, the glistening princess always wins."
"I think I can relate from personal experience, the Sparkling Princess doesn't get the best breaks. If she is going to get her happy ending, she's going to have to work for it," he assured her.
She frowned, disgusted by his assurance. "Before you go all gooey on them, they annihilated their first homeland because they couldn't stop hating one another," she said darkly, "If Super - Celestia, ever let them be themselves, they'd turn this place into a planet that makes an ice cube look like a blazing desert."
"You don't much like ponies, do you?" he asked.
"I can take them or leave them, but am more inclined to leave them. There's nothing special about them. Nothing at all."
Interesting attitude, considering she's studying magic, a science practically governed by ponies. Unless she's a greater master than they and is learning all their foibles and how to correct them? he wondered.
"So I'm going to tell the ponies to quit poking the spirit of the library with a stick, and they have nothing to worry about."
"I wouldn't say that exactly," she said, "But I think telling them the spirit of the library will only finish what they've already started is a good idea."
What have they done in my absence? he wanted to know.
The commotion in the main hall drew his attention, and a quiet sigh from the girl. He looked over the railing at the pack of three minotaurs and a diamond dog in approximately matching jumpsuits. He looked back to the girl to find she and her gear had vanished.
I'm going to find who hired them, and run them through the gates of hades, then Tartarus, personally, he headed down the stairs.
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Star walked in first and gave his trademark, "Anybody seen a ghost?"
Wendy remembered Granny saying Tuxedo had never understood why anyone thought it was funny when she'd been talking about her 'eccentric' offspring. Zephyr, the diamond dog simply pulled the crystal scanner and found the hottest trace and began following it. It led straight to where Wendy had been. From the wraithworld, she watched him pass and begin back tracking.
Winter, a white-haired minotaur spotted the same thing Zephyr had. "Tux, violet's supposed to be low-energy right?"
"Yes," the glasses wearing minotaur ambled over to where the minotaur and diamond dog looked at the brilliantly glowing crystal. "And brightness denotes intensity."
"So how do you get high-intensity, low-energy?" Winter asked.
Zephyr grinned. "Let's go find out!" He was charging off towards the stairs Wendy had walked down only a few moments earlier.
"Containment formation," Star said, "Winter, keep an eye on Zephyr," he added.
The diamond dog nodded and headed after the most enthusiastic member of the team.
Wendy followed, their equipment seemed incapable of discovering where she was, but could track where she'd been. She watched as they approached the self-proclaimed Sith, and like a compass needle all of them turned towards him.
He's not going to . . . she thought.
"I'm not the one you're looking for," he told them.
The cynical Star, and enthusiastic Zephyr both frowned. The verified they're out of each other's line of fire, and their equipment starts to make a high-pitched whirring sound.
"Not your wisest course of action, friend," Star said quietly, he smiled but the smile had teeth.
Darth Bates frowned then raised his hands. Wendy followed them at a short distance, then stowed away on their wagon as they returned to their base.
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This is both stupid and embarrassing, I think as I glance at my four captors, It is the best way to find out who hired them. I swear, if it was Luna, I'll wring her neck. Thus spake Darth Bates. The kid is probably laughing her ass off at being caught by the local witch hunters.
The city is more like the ones I was used to, although infinitely cleaner. The chatter of the other four contains jargon that is impenetrable, and oddly worrying. 'A full torso apparition' is worryingly close to the truth of my condition. They also are keeping my captivity low-key. No insults or abuse, just two of their number observing me closely. I hate facing off against professionals. They have a lot more experience with tricky opponents, and many more ways to prevent repetition of tricky behavior.
The building we pull into is part base and part domicile. There are diamond dogs all over the place, a few minotaurs, a griffon or two. No ponies, and none of the people is a child. One or two are in the throes of puberty, but the look in the eyes takes away the childish sense of them. Everyone here has 'seen the wampa' and survived intact. On Equestria, problems are either utterly trivial, or 'rip your mind and soul apart and jump up and down on your bleeding corpse'. If they saw one of the latter, and lived, sane and rational, they are not to be trifled with.
The leader begins walking to the back of the wagon, and placed his hand down, several inches from the rail of the wagon. "You go ahead. Star, you and Zephyr question him, I'll catch up."
The two minotaurs nod and lead him through the building to a small library.
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Wendy froze as Tuxedo laid his hand right on her shoulder. "You two go ahead and question him. I'll catch up," the minotaur said, just resting his on her shoulder. She realized the diamond dog was looking straight at her face, not just at where the minotaur was touching.
He waited until the pair and Darth Bates were out of sight. "Then we can talk privately."
They led her to a kitchen. Tuxedo released her and gestured to a chair. "Please have a seat. Is tea all right?"
She pulled out the chair and slid it back in, as if she were sitting in it. The diamond dog held the cup of tea in front of her face.
"I am Winter Meadow, because I have the sight," the diamond dog, Winter, said.
She willed herself back to visibility and sat down before accepting the cup. "Thank you. So you can see me?"
"I can make out where you are," Winter said, and smiled, "But if I look at you too hard, I can't see this world anymore."
She nodded. The tea was warm and soothing in her hands. "I didn't know there was other magic in this world."
Both of them, and a voice out of sight behind a curtain all chuckled.
"My teacher. He's a zebra and you have a problem with ponies, so despite a thousand questions, he will remain unseen," Winter said.
She drank some of the tea, and looked around at the very homey kitchen.
"My grandmother is very worried about you," Tuxedo said, and set down a large bag beside his own tea. "Before you ask, I am a parapsychitrist, that means I am a doctor doctor, as well as a spook chaser. All though my expertise sometimes makes me feel more like a veterinarian. The species being so different. You'd think pegasus wings and griffon wings were similar, but they aren't. This tells overall health from basic cell activity." He held up a large crystal. "It's not perfect but it will see if there are areas where the action is different." He held the crystal like someone in the movies would hold a Geiger counter. The crystal glowed a steady, soft, yellow-white.
If that's the color it's supposed to be I'm in good shape, she thought.
"How are you finding this world?" the voice behind the curtain asked.
"I want to go home, but I have to complete my journey first," she admitted.
"Ah, Winter has strayed so far off the path, he may crash into the goal at any moment," the unseen zebra said. He and Winter chuckled.
The crystal had changed color near her neck. She froze and stared at it.
"Just some scar tissue. You were injured there," Tuxedo said, "Some time back."
"Yes, I had a run-in with a horse," she said.
"Strong language," said the man behind the curtain, "For such a young one."
"I was attacked just because I was weaker. My grandfather rescued me," she admitted. She looked at Tuxedo. "Why is your grandmother worried about me?"
"Sleeping in that ancient apartment under the cafeteria. Spending all your time studying things someone with your powers should already know. Facing monsters who would overmatch the entire defense force," he said as he completed his scan. "Why shouldn't she be worried? It didn't take her long to figure out someone invisible helped her in that alley. And that same invisible person was poking around the library. She's a senior librarian because she has a doctorate in Library Science, part of her thesis was basically figuring out what your 'customers' need, before they walk in the door."
"You also messed up, the area where you rescued her has been manufacturing and offices for two centuries," Winter said, "There's no way you could have been from around there."
"She's assuming where I rescued her is where I was talking about," she replied then squeezed her eyes shut as Winter smiled. She realized she'd given herself away.
"Don't blame yourself," Winter said, "Our job is often to find out what people, well, spirits want, so they can pass on. They aren't the best or most willing talkers. We're very good at what we do. We can't simply blast something with superpony magic and have the problem go away."
"The problems don't go away," she said, "Nightmare Moon was just the first. The bindings by the Princesses and the Elements of Harmony are unraveling. Nightmare Moon first, and then Discord, then Sombra, and then Tirek. They didn't solve anything. They just swept it under the rug to jump up and bite someone else later on."
"Is that why you journeyed from your world?" Tuxedo asked.
"There are more worlds than you can imagine, not just the spirit world," she said, and finally managed to shock them. "Some would watch your daily lives and consider it entertainment."
Winter and Tuxedo shifted uncomfortably.
"But some still value and have empathy for you here. 'Childish' as it may seem, I cannot solve all your problems, or give you but the most basic answers, but I can deflect some of the worst until you can stand against it yourselves." She looked at the faces and wondered what they thought of what she'd said.
I might as well be transparent to them, same way I was to Grampa and Nana, they seemed to instantly know what I was doing, and get inside my head, she thought.
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I am not having any fun.
"Look, Mister -?" the star-blazed minotaur asks.
"Darth Bates," I reply, "And you two are?"
"Star."
Of course.
"I'm Zephyr," the other minotaur says, he seems the more joyful of the pair.
Star looks at me with undisguised cynicism. "Look, we appreciate that Celestia sent you on your little spy mission, and full marks on not invading with a passel of ponies, but we really don't need people poking around where we are investigating," Star says, politely explaining, for a given level of polite. "This entity has not crossed into Equestrian territory, heck, it hasn't even left the capital. So why go poking at a hornets' nest when it spanked one of Equestria's legendary big-bads. I know the ponies worry about us poor deluded folk without sparkly powers and a goddess, but we make out all right."
"Considering that Equestria probably hired you, I think we have a case of one hand not knowing what the other is doing," I reply.
Star covers fast, but the flash of uncertainty was there. Zephyr tries to hide his expression in his coffee cup.
Star doesn't even try to deflect that, he stays on his point, "We live here, we have the experience and a thirty-year track record," he says, "Nopony'd heard of you until Nightmare Moon returned, and you are from the Everfree Forest from all accounts. It may surprise you that we are capable of handling our own internal affairs and that we've had the girl under surveillance for quite some time. And that short of the provocation that Equestria seems eager to deliver, she's personable, nonthreatening, even eager to please and avoid harm or even discomfort of the people around her. You might also like to know that we have also determined that her response to Nightmare's invasion was a measured one to force her to leave."
"In other words," Zephyr says, "If she wanted Nightmare dead, she'd be dead. Does our hands-off approach make sense now?"
I nod. I am not pleased being dropped into a situation already being handled, and it seems handled expertly. It makes me and my 'employer' look like clumsy fools. Equestria needs as spiffy an image right now as it can get.
"And we were already aware that with the Elements of Harmony in new hooves, whatever was wrought with them by Princesses Celestia and Luna would begin to dissipate," Star says, "So if that hasn't gotten back to the highest circles of Equestria, then you've earned your pay, and have every reason to race home to inform them of the dire situation they find themselves in."
"You aren't afraid of Discord's return?" I ask.
The pair chuckle. "Not really. If something transfers us into the puddle of greatly increased scariness, we don't panic like ponies do. We overcome," Star says, "We venerate him."
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"Discord is called 'The Strengthener'," Tuxedo told Wendy, "Chaos happens with or without him. Surmounting a little extra on our life's journey makes us stronger, better and more worthy. Probably the same thinking that sent you here."
What? she thought and couldn't keep the shock from her face.
"So, if he broke free and came here?" she asked.
"There'd be a transition period, but we'd welcome it. If he turned a building upside down, but kept everything stuck to the 'floor' we'd just get a step ladder and climb in," Tuxedo said. "The ponies had a history of doing that and worse to their rivals. The princesses haven't exactly threatened us with cutting off the sun, but every griffon and minotaur knows it's well within her power to do so. The ponies used to do it all the time."
I can't say I believe Superhorse would do it, but I never believed that the Russians and Americans would nuke each other either, she thought, They just believe she could.
"So what do you want me to do?" she asked.
"Aside from guaranteeing you aren't going to wash us all away in a gigantic flood, or generate a memetic construct that will reduce us all to drooling zombies, not a thing. No, I take that back. Wait a moment." Tuxedo began fishing through his jacket, and pulled out a slip of paper. "Sabbath dinners with Granny and I, and a couple of others. She's nervous I don't get out more, and she got the same concern for you."
"Considering she knows where I live, I guess I don't have a choice," she said, "Is she, ah, mad for what I did?"
"After finding that hidden store of books, she'll forgive darn near anything, so will Henny," Tuxedo said.
"It also gives them a live-in mage to protect the library," Winter added.
"Why are there so many problems with ponies?" she asked, "I haven't had a single problem with minotaurs."
"Cutie Mark Insanity Syndrome," Tuxedo said, "Ponies believe they are linked to magic and their destiny on reaching puberty. They still have some latitude, but they are basically locked in. If they transgress against their destiny, their magic or their psyche backlashes, and they go dangerously insane."
"No wonder you folks don't mind not having magic," she said, "Does every pony go through it?"
"Every pony," the voice behind the curtain said, "Summoning and giving into Nightmare Moon was Luna's."
"What about Celestia?" she asked.
Winter and Tuxedo looked at each other. "We're rather hoping she's immune," came from behind the curtain.
Oh crap. The rings on her fingers got a lot heavier.