//------------------------------// // Critique // Story: Reddux the Tyrant // by PaulAsaran //------------------------------// Reddux the Tyrant Chapter VII Critique “It’s okay,” a voice called from within the room, “he may pass.” The guard stepped aside and Fancy promptly entered. He was back in Celestia’s temporary chambers, the princess lying in her bed and surrounded by distraught looking ponies. Sir Deeds gestured for him to come closer. “Sorry about that, First Lieutenant,” he said. “You can’t blame them for being a little jumpy right now.” Fancy took in Celestia’s broken body. The sight held his chest in an iron grip and he lowered his ears against the sound of her shallow, raspy breathing. “What did the healers say?” “She’s refused them,” Sir Deeds replied with an unpleasant frown. “What?” Fancy stared at him. “And they agreed?” “They… had no choice.” Fancy turned to find Celestia’s eyes half-opened and set upon him. He promptly stood at attention, the other ponies around the bed doing the same. Celestia surveyed her surroundings, her mouth open a she sucked down long breaths. She somehow managed to crack a smile. “Please, everypony. Leave me… to my rest. I promise not… not to die anytime soon.” The ponies all exchanged wary looks, but slowly began to file out. Celestia managed to barely raise her uninjured leg. “Not you, Sir Deeds. Or you, Fancy.” The two stallions shared a glance before nodding. They watched her as the others left, but Celestia only closed her eyes and remained silent. When the door closed, she finally spoke. “I do not have long. An alicorn’s body… heals quickly, but I fear the process… will require much energy. I will sleep soon.” “Sleep?” Sir Deeds frowned, his eyes going to the window and the smoke still rising from the city. “For how long?” Celestia emitted a small groan as she shifted to a more comfortable position. “Long. I have not sustained… such injuries in centuries, so I am not sure. A few weeks.” Her eyes turned to the lord. “I apologize Sir Deeds, but you will have… have to lead the defense… without me for a while.” Sir Deeds’ mouth worked silently for a couple seconds, but at last he nodded. “I understand, Princess.” Fancy shook his head. “Princess, why not let the healers help you?” “They are needed in the city,” she replied, her sleepy eyes turning to him. “And the dragons could come at any time. They need to be well rested to… to support everypony. I will heal on my own.” She smiled at his frown. “Do not fret, Fancy. Alicorn anatomy is such that… that they couldn’t do much for me anyway.” Sir Deeds leaned towards her, his expression fierce. “I swear to you, Princess, Reddux and his cohorts will pay for your defeat. On my honor as a dragonslayer.” “Defeat?” Celestia smirked, and the expression made both stallions lean back. “This was not a defeat, Sir Deeds. Oh, no. This was a draw.” Fancy tilted his head as he glanced upon her battered body. “A draw?” “Reddux expected an easy victory,” she explained, her eyes going to the ceiling. “He never imagined a mere… mere pony could harm him, and harm him I most certainly did. He will think twice before trying again.” Fancy shook his head. “But what if he attacks while you are healing?” She was quiet for a few seconds, her eyelids drooping a little more. “Then it will be up to all of you to protect Equestria.” Sir Deeds snapped to attention. “Of course. If he comes back, we’ll be ready.” Fancy shot the stallion a dubious look. “And if every dragon in the Burning Lands comes?” The Lord of Estéril Pezuñas blanched, but didn’t lose his solid stance. “I haven’t the time to explain,” Celestia whispered, “but the dragons will not… will not follow Reddux just because he killed… killed the First Fang and his mate. He will need something more to… to rally them to his cause.” “See, First Lieutenant? It’s not hopeless just yet.” Sir Deeds offered a smile, but Fancy noticed the waver in his lips. Celestia rolled her head to face them. “Sir Deeds, I would like a moment with Fancy.” Fancy blinked. “With me?” “As you wish.” Sir Deeds turned to walk for the door, but paused to whisper in Fancy’s ear, “Aren’t we the popular stallion? Do behave yourself, Oh Chaser of Princesses.” Fancy glared at the back of Sir Deeds’ head as he made for the door. His words came out in a low growl. “Why does everypony make that ridiculous assumption?” “Fancy.” He turned to Celestia as the door closed, his stomach twisting as he realized he was once again alone with the princess. She stared at him, lips set in a deep frown. “You promised me you would not needlessly risk your life.” He cocked his head at this statement. “I don’t understand.” She sucked in a deep breath and cringed, but her eyes never left his. “Did you think I wouldn’t notice you on the beach?” “Oh…” He shuffled his hooves and bowed his head. “I couldn’t just run away.” “It was reckless of you,” she whispered. “You broke your promise, Fancy, and I do not appreciate it.” He stared at the floor and his ears lowered. “What else was I supposed to do? Flee like the others?” She raised her head, but only by a fraction. “I understand your wish to make a difference, Fancy. I know you cannot be lulled from this course.” She let her head fall back to the pillow, her pink mane surrounding her face like a carpet. She took a few more deep breaths before speaking again. “If you truly must fight… then do it properly. You were very lucky you weren’t killed.” “And what about your—” Fancy clamped his mouth closed so fast his teeth clicked. Blood rushed to his cheeks as he averted his gaze once more. What was it with him and debating with her? Her hoof touched his leg, making him jump and look her in the eyes. Her words were soft, but commanding. “Next time, Fancy, be prepared. Have a plan. Know what you are going to do before you actually do it. I want you to enjoy my sunrise a few thousand more times.” She smiled for him, but it faded quickly as her teeth clenched in pain. “I… I will try, your majesty.” “Good.” She relaxed and closed her eyes. “I am sorry… I am too tired. I have to… sleep…” As her voice drifted, her breathing took on a slow and steady rhythm. He watched her for several seconds, heart twisting as he took another look her wounds. Fancy considered leaving… but couldn’t bring himself to turn away. So he sat and watched. He was there for a long time, pondering on her words and how he could keep his. How does one plan for a dragon attack? He glanced to the window, where the sun still shined high in the sky. He wondered if the world would remain stuck this way until she awoke. Time passed, yet still he didn’t leave. He wondered if somepony would come grab him after a while. He was abruptly aware of a new presence, though he’d not heard the door open. “You’re a pain in the flank, Son of Bright Plume.” Fancy looked up to find that strange, pink-maned stallion standing opposite the bed. “You?” The stallion’s eyes were set on Celestia’s face. His shoulders were slumped and his eyes heavy with concern. “How’s a stallion supposed to spend some alone time with the mare of his dreams when others won’t leave?” Fancy offered no response. The stranger paid him no more mind, instead leaning over so his lips were near Celestia’s ear. “I’m not sure if you can hear me,” he whispered, “and I know you hate me and what I do… but we’re here, Celestia. We’re doing our job. Equestria won’t fall, not while we’re watching her. Try to take comfort in that, okay? I promise, we’ll still be here when you wake up.” Celestia made no attempt to answer, and after a few seconds the stranger stood up straight. Fancy studied his concerned frown and shifting stance. “Do you… work for her?” The stallion’s eyes turned to him. “I understand you, Fancy Pants. I understand what you feel towards Celestia. Other ponies make fun of you for it, but I know that a loyalty like yours goes beyond obligation or respect.” Fancy fidgeted and turned his eyes back to the princess. He could think of nothing to say, so he remained silent. The stranger went on, “Many ponies serve Celestia because she is the princess of Equestria, but you and me? We know she is much more than that. Keep hold of that faith, Fancy. You may find it as invaluable as she is in the coming days.” Fancy looked up as the stranger turned away. “Who are you?” The pegasus paused at the door. He stood there for a couple seconds before finally looking over his shoulder. “A pony who will stop at nothing to keep her safe.” He left without another word. Fancy stared at the door for several long seconds, but finally turned back to the slumbering princess. He settled himself into a comfortable position by the bed. He had absolutely no intention of leaving until he had to. The sting in Reddux’s ribs became too aggravating. He grimaced and clutched at the large burn as he circled for a landing. His claws touched down on the cracked, orange ground that stretched all about him for as far as his keen eyes could see. Rearing onto his hind legs, he inspected his wound. Though melded together in an ugly mess, his scales were intact. It wouldn’t be pleasant when it came time to shed them. Reddux tucked his gargantuan wings to give the wounded muscles some relief. Yet even as the searing pain dulled to a mere aching, he couldn’t relax. On the contrary, his claws opened and closed into fists over and over again and he sneered at the ground. He had heard of Celestia’s power, but the thought that he’d underestimated her had his blood boiling. Mere ponies should not possess the power to harm dragons. His gaze rose to the sun, which glared down from a cloudless sky. It hadn’t moved at all since he’d left the city in flames. He realized it probably wouldn’t move for some time. How long before his allies figured out the magic? Then again, maybe it wouldn’t require much study. As he lowered his head, he spotted something in the distance. It was a dragon of a deep gold, and it flew directly for him. He frowned as he rubbed his wound and waited for the stranger to come closer. At last he recognized the drake. He was big by dragon standards, though still small in comparison to the mighty Reddux. His scales were dull with age, his horns cracked in places and his tail cut short by a dozen feet, ending in a scarred nub. His eyes were fogged with cataracts, but they were able to focus on Reddux easily enough. Reddux stiffened his shoulders and crossed his arms as his visitor landed before him. “Parjin. Come to pontificate, I assume.” Parjin sat back, his eyes narrowed as he contemplated Reddux. “You never learned to mind your elders, young drake. I heard some disturbing news involving you.” A toothy grin came upon Reddux’s face. “All true, old drake. I have claimed the Hoard of Blazen.” “Foolish.” Parjin scowled up at Reddux, his fogged eyes still capable of flashing in anger. “What do you hope to achieve? The hoards will not follow you just because you have killed the First Fang and his mate.” “Blazen was weak,” Reddux replied with a snarl. “You know this, Elderwyrm! He all but bowed to the ponies.” “A typical response from the ignorant.” Parjin waved a dismissive claw. “When faced with a Hoard that cannot be breached, fly circles around it.” Reddux’s claws tensed. “Be careful what you say, old drake. The hoards understand force. They will follow me against the ponies.” Parjin snorted a small cloud of smoke right in Reddux’s face. “Why should they? All you have done is divide the hoards until a new First Fang is chosen. Have you forgotten Blazen’s daughter?” Ignoring the smoke, Reddux turned and began to walk away. “Sorahna is dead. I’ve seen to it. Go stare at some rocks, old drake; there’s genocide to be had.” “You’re limping, little lizard.” A vicious growl rose from Reddux’s throat as he turned on the Elderwyrm. “Celestia is broken! I defeated her with my own claws, scorched her with my own—” “You cannot burn Princess Celestia,” Parjin said, head held high. “Not even with dragon fire.” Reddux claw reached forward to grasp Parjin’s throat. “Do not test me, old fool, or I’ll end you as I did her!” Parjin didn’t even flinch. His eyes narrowed and his lips sank into a frown. “Did you really kill the princess of the ponies?” “No.” Reddux leaned forward so their snouts were touching. “She will live long enough to watch her precious Equestria burn.” Parjin pressed back against Reddux’s aggressive pose. “The hoards will never support a war against the equines.” “They must!” Redux bared his fangs. “They all know the ponies are weak, feeble wretches. They don’t deserve to breathe the same air as us! Why should we leave them their lands, their freedoms, their lives? They should be bowing to us as deities, yet instead we make deals with them. Why, Elderwyrm?” Parjin was unaffected by Reddux’s anger. “Get your claw off my throat.” Reddux only tightened his hold and growled. “What are you going to do, kill me?” Parjin sneered. “The hoards are already upset with your actions. Many will treat you as their enemy should I die by your claw. Do not think there aren’t those who know where I am at this very moment.” Reddux’s shoulders tensed and he let out another growl. His claw squeezed a little tighter, his other shaking with the urge to rip apart the old bastard’s face. At last he pulled back, releasing Parjin and folding his arms with a snort. “You are lucky the hoards respect you so, Elderwyrm, or I would cease your meddling here and now.” Parjin leaned back in a more relaxed pose and took a moment to rub his throat. “Do you even understand why they call me the Elderwyrm, little whelp?” “I tire of your lectures, old fool.” “You are far too young.” Parjin set a claw to his own heart and bowed his head. “I remember The Voice, Reddux. She spoke to me, back when the world was young. You cannot fathom—” “The Voice is gone!” Reddux threw up his claws with a roar. “She abandoned this world to its own devices! Do not speak to me of deities long dead.” “She did not abandon us,” Parjin snarled. “She sacrificed her existence so that we might exist free of The Blight. The ponies were her favored race. You would do well to respect that.” “The favored race of a dead goddess.” Reddux thrust his claw aside in a denying motion. “She had poor taste. The dragons are the superior race, and I will prove it to you all. The hoards will recognize this soon enough.” “The Voice wished for the ponies to thrive,” Parjin countered, his calm a stark difference from Reddux’s anger. “The hoards will not so quickly abandon the will of one who gave her existence to save us all from destruction. We do not even need the territories beyond the Burning Lands; they provide us with everything that we desire, for The Voice was wise and gracious.” Reddux leaned forward to glare into Parjin’s eyes. “And what of the eggs, Elderwyrm? Will you deny what was laid before your very eyes?” Once again, Parjin waved a dismissive claw. “One broken egg and a pony’s corpse is not proof that the ponies are stealing from our nests. That sounds more like the work of changelings to me.” Reddux let out another roar, smoke flying from his nostrils over Parjin’s head. “They are killing our unborn! Dozens of eggs have been lost already and you peddle in specifics! I will not await your precious evidence, and neither will the hoards. Support me, Elderwyrm, and let the hoards unite, or defy me and leave us divided. Either way, I will destroy the ponies.” “No.” Parjin crossed his arms in defiance, snout raised high. “I will not condone the slaughter of the ponies. I will not betray the will of The Voice.” Reddux leaned forward, his claws tensed once more as his shoulders shook. Her bared his fangs and let out a long growl as he half-reached for Parjin’s throat once more… but he held back. “Damn you, old fool! You doom us to war amongst ourselves!” “You killed Blazen and Sihalay. You chose to harm Princess Celestia. And—” Parjin’s tail swung about to slap at Reddux’s scorched scales. The larger dragon winced, “—nodrake will believe you are invincible after seeing this. I saw Celestia’s grandmare use the same spell on my brother, little whelp. You are lucky to be alive.” Reddux let out a bellow and leapt forward, knocking Parjin on his back. He made no attempt to follow up the attack, though. “Listen well, Parjin the Elder!” Reddux thrust a single finger at Parjin. “When the last pony is but ash and the last dragon has resisted my rule, I will snap your puny neck and hang your wings over my cave. The respect the hoards grant you now will not last, and I will be the First Fang long after your desiccated corpse has been forgotten and withered to dust. I am Reddux the Tyrant, and every creature on this planet will bow before that name.” He launched, wings raising him high as he turned to the northwest. A wicked smile curled on his lips as he anticipated the glorious moment when he would no longer have to bear that foul creature’s yammering. Parjin’s shout managed to reach him as he made distance between them. “The ponies are stronger than you think, Reddux! “You underestimate them at your own peril.”